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My Story Again to beach towel
Seems you don't remember my story or haven't heard it before. I guit Drinking and all drugs back in 1991. I was finally convinced on a 1st offense DUI charge after being arrested and having the charges dropped on seven others. This caused me to realize how close I came to looseing my Pilots Medical and my way of life. I went 11 years completely sober "not just dry drunking" before I started using Crystal meth recreationally. The problem came when I hired a pilot to work for me that knew how to cok the Crystal and taught me how to do so for myself. Within an 8 month period I wnet from using ocassionally, to using an endless and free ever day supply. You see, My cooking operation out grew me and my friends. It grew into a $48,000 dollar a week job that included being one of "if not the" biggest suppliers of crystal in the Mid-South area. There were a lot of small labs running an ounce a week, I was cranking out almost 2lbs a week to the 3 biggest biker gangs and two other main dealers. Not small time for a 1 man operation. The cops wanted me bad and the got me through my wife who had a car wreck with some evidence in her car. They used the evidence found in her car to arrest me also. I stayed in jail a week on a $1,000,000 bond. It got reduced to $75,000 On the condition that I would go strait to a rehab center. That's where I attended 90 in 90 Gratefull to not be in jail and facing 48 years minimum.
Needless to say you can not convict someone on evidence found in someone elses car unless the car happened to be in both our names. Luckily for me it was a rental car rented in just her name because she had,had an accicent a week earlier. So the charges aginst me were dropped. Her attorney went to court and told the judge and DA that they had just let the biggest meth cook in three states go and it would not be fare to convict her on evidence that was mine even though tecnically they couldn't prove it. So the charges aginst her were dropped on the promise that she stay in a 1 year treatment physicility. She did and is now a drug therapist there after finishing herclinicals when she cot out. She already had the masters in Psychology and was working in a treatment center before We were arrested. I attended meetings 3 times a week for the next five years staying completely sober. It was not untill some Recent Dental work that I switched addictions to Pain Pills. I have been on and off them for the last 8 or so months and have quit with Tapering, Cold Turkey, and now with Subutex during the first 6 days and then on to Subutex for this month. In which time I will also totally quit taking them.
I do now the words and have known the music for the last 16 years. I just at a couple points didn't want to listen to it. I know what it's like to be sober for years at a time, And have no doubt that I will know that feeling again. I have the willpower, means and ways, and Support to do so with no doubt in my mind.
I will do it one day at a time!
I will do it one day at a time!
PLEASE FORGIVE ME IF THIS SOUNDS LIKE A STUPID QUESTION...BUT WHY WOULD YOU TRY CRYSTAL METH FOR THE FIRST TIME?
A LITTLE BACKGROUND...I HAVE A 29 YEAR OLD SON WHO HAS BEEN ADDICTED TO C/M FOR ABOUT 10 YEARS. HE IS SO "OUT OF CONTROL" AS I AM WRITING. THE ONLY TIME HE HAS BEEN CLEAN IS WHEN HE WAS IN PRISON OR REHAB...AND THAT WAS A SHORT TIME IN COMPARISION TO HIS TIME OUT ON THE STREETS. TIME IS ALL HE'S GOT RIGHT NOW BECAUSE IT WON'T BE LONG BEFORE HE GETS CAUGHT AND GOES BACK...AND I HATE TO SAY IT BUT I CAN'T WAIT...AT LEAST I KNOW HE IS OFF THE STREETS.
OK, BACK TO ORIGINAL QUESTION. KNOWING HOW ADDICTIVE C/M IS AND KNOWING WHAT IT IS MADE OF...HOW CAN A PERSON MAKE THE DECISION TO USE IT...EVEN ONCE? I JUST DON'T UNDERSTAND HOW SOMEONE CAN PUT "THAT RECIPE" IN THEIR SYSTEM.
A LITTLE BACKGROUND...I HAVE A 29 YEAR OLD SON WHO HAS BEEN ADDICTED TO C/M FOR ABOUT 10 YEARS. HE IS SO "OUT OF CONTROL" AS I AM WRITING. THE ONLY TIME HE HAS BEEN CLEAN IS WHEN HE WAS IN PRISON OR REHAB...AND THAT WAS A SHORT TIME IN COMPARISION TO HIS TIME OUT ON THE STREETS. TIME IS ALL HE'S GOT RIGHT NOW BECAUSE IT WON'T BE LONG BEFORE HE GETS CAUGHT AND GOES BACK...AND I HATE TO SAY IT BUT I CAN'T WAIT...AT LEAST I KNOW HE IS OFF THE STREETS.
OK, BACK TO ORIGINAL QUESTION. KNOWING HOW ADDICTIVE C/M IS AND KNOWING WHAT IT IS MADE OF...HOW CAN A PERSON MAKE THE DECISION TO USE IT...EVEN ONCE? I JUST DON'T UNDERSTAND HOW SOMEONE CAN PUT "THAT RECIPE" IN THEIR SYSTEM.
all i can say is wow. You are very lucky to be around to help all of us as we go through our own dramas. glad that you got smart before it was too late
I will tell you the truth about meth and why I started.
I have ADHD and was never medicated for it. my parents didn't believe in medications even though my mother was a nurse. I was in a bar with my wife one night "not drinking I might add" and she came out of the bathroom and told me she had just tried some. She had been hearing all about it from the people in the rehab where she was an intake therapist. She asked If I wanted to try some and stupid me didn't understand the whole addict is an addict principle and I thought I was just an addict to alcohol. Sooo I tried it and for the first time in my life I felt "normal" like other people. I was not high or hyper as I usually am. I felt normal. We tried using it every other weekend and it was great. The problem came when I hired a pilot to work at the flying service that I managed, that knew how to make it. My wife was a pain pill addict and was spending her whole check on pain pills off the street. I figured that if she liked the Crystal just as much and we could make it for almost free that would be great and I would also have a medication for my ADHD.
Next: Crystal meth is not a cake recipe where all the stuff you put in it stays in it. There is no battery acid in it. There is no drain cleaner in it. There is no amonia or lithium or anything else in it. There actually is no chemical in it at all other than sudafed that is missing 1 oxygen atom due to a chemical chenmical reduction caused by the reaction between the other ahemicals. Without giving out too much information, I can tell you that all the chemicals that are used to make Crystal are removed before you gethe final product. Unless someone screws up the process it is just as clean as sudafed that you buy at the store, actually cleaner because pills have binders and other things in them to make them stick together in pill form. The other problem is when the street dealers get the strait crystal and cut it with some other ingredient to increase thier profit margin.
I hate to admit it but strait crystal is no worse for you than sudafed. It's just a lot more addictive. When that 1 oxygen atom is removed from the sudafed it allows it to cross the Blood-Brain barrier because it is now smaller, and goes further into your brain therefore it causes a much stronger effect.
I am not advicating Crystal use by any means, as it ruined my, and my exwife's lives for quite some time even after we got strait. It took me 4 years to build back everything I lost, and last time I taalked to her she was just getting on her feet financially.
It is the most addictive drug out there, and trust me, while I was on Crystal I tried them all with the exception of heroine. I only missed it because I was never around any.
Untill he decides he wants to stay sober he will never do it. And once he does, he will need meetings, therapy and any other support he can possibly find, It is absolutely the worst thing I ever did to myself and I've done a lot. this battle with pain pills was nothing campaired to what I went through with the Crystal. Not physically but psychologically.
I know what you mean anout him being in jail, at least you know he is safe. I feel for you but it is the sad truth.
I have ADHD and was never medicated for it. my parents didn't believe in medications even though my mother was a nurse. I was in a bar with my wife one night "not drinking I might add" and she came out of the bathroom and told me she had just tried some. She had been hearing all about it from the people in the rehab where she was an intake therapist. She asked If I wanted to try some and stupid me didn't understand the whole addict is an addict principle and I thought I was just an addict to alcohol. Sooo I tried it and for the first time in my life I felt "normal" like other people. I was not high or hyper as I usually am. I felt normal. We tried using it every other weekend and it was great. The problem came when I hired a pilot to work at the flying service that I managed, that knew how to make it. My wife was a pain pill addict and was spending her whole check on pain pills off the street. I figured that if she liked the Crystal just as much and we could make it for almost free that would be great and I would also have a medication for my ADHD.
Next: Crystal meth is not a cake recipe where all the stuff you put in it stays in it. There is no battery acid in it. There is no drain cleaner in it. There is no amonia or lithium or anything else in it. There actually is no chemical in it at all other than sudafed that is missing 1 oxygen atom due to a chemical chenmical reduction caused by the reaction between the other ahemicals. Without giving out too much information, I can tell you that all the chemicals that are used to make Crystal are removed before you gethe final product. Unless someone screws up the process it is just as clean as sudafed that you buy at the store, actually cleaner because pills have binders and other things in them to make them stick together in pill form. The other problem is when the street dealers get the strait crystal and cut it with some other ingredient to increase thier profit margin.
I hate to admit it but strait crystal is no worse for you than sudafed. It's just a lot more addictive. When that 1 oxygen atom is removed from the sudafed it allows it to cross the Blood-Brain barrier because it is now smaller, and goes further into your brain therefore it causes a much stronger effect.
I am not advicating Crystal use by any means, as it ruined my, and my exwife's lives for quite some time even after we got strait. It took me 4 years to build back everything I lost, and last time I taalked to her she was just getting on her feet financially.
It is the most addictive drug out there, and trust me, while I was on Crystal I tried them all with the exception of heroine. I only missed it because I was never around any.
Untill he decides he wants to stay sober he will never do it. And once he does, he will need meetings, therapy and any other support he can possibly find, It is absolutely the worst thing I ever did to myself and I've done a lot. this battle with pain pills was nothing campaired to what I went through with the Crystal. Not physically but psychologically.
I know what you mean anout him being in jail, at least you know he is safe. I feel for you but it is the sad truth.
THANK YOU FOR THE INFO. I GUESS WHEN I TRY TO TALK TO HIM ABOUT ALL THE JUNK THEY USE TO MAKE IT, HE IS QUICK TO COME BACK WITH, "I DON'T DO THAT S**T, I DO ICE".
HE TOO WAS DIAGNOSED WITH ADHD AS A CHILD AND TOOK STIMULANTS FROM THE SECOND GRADE TIL HIGH SCHOOL. HE IS STILL SO HYPER THAT SOMETIMES IT'S HARD TO TELL WHEN HE IS ACTUALLY HIGH...OTHER THAN HIS PUPILS, HIS DEAD GIVE AWAY IS HIS SPEECH...HE TALKS FASTER THAN NORMAL AND HIS WORDS ARE VERY CHOPPY...LIKE HE DOESN'T PRONOUNCE THE WHOLE WORD BEFORE GOING ON TO THE NEXT.
STIMULANTS HAVE ALWAYS BEEN HIS DRUG OF CHOICE AND HE BLAMES HIS ADDICTION ON THE FACT THAT HE STARTED THEM IN GRAMMAR SCHOOL. I DON'T KNOW IF HE IS TRYING TO PLACE THE BLAME ELSEWHERE AND NOT TAKE RESPONSIBILITY OR IF THIS INDEED COULD HAVE HAD AN EFFECT ON HIS ADDICTION. I AS A MOTHER TRUSTED HIS PEDIATRICIAN AND KNEW, FIRSTHAND, THAT HE WAS NOT ABLE TO SIT IN CLASS ALL DAY WITHOUT IT. WHAT'S A MOM TO DO...
HE TOO WAS DIAGNOSED WITH ADHD AS A CHILD AND TOOK STIMULANTS FROM THE SECOND GRADE TIL HIGH SCHOOL. HE IS STILL SO HYPER THAT SOMETIMES IT'S HARD TO TELL WHEN HE IS ACTUALLY HIGH...OTHER THAN HIS PUPILS, HIS DEAD GIVE AWAY IS HIS SPEECH...HE TALKS FASTER THAN NORMAL AND HIS WORDS ARE VERY CHOPPY...LIKE HE DOESN'T PRONOUNCE THE WHOLE WORD BEFORE GOING ON TO THE NEXT.
STIMULANTS HAVE ALWAYS BEEN HIS DRUG OF CHOICE AND HE BLAMES HIS ADDICTION ON THE FACT THAT HE STARTED THEM IN GRAMMAR SCHOOL. I DON'T KNOW IF HE IS TRYING TO PLACE THE BLAME ELSEWHERE AND NOT TAKE RESPONSIBILITY OR IF THIS INDEED COULD HAVE HAD AN EFFECT ON HIS ADDICTION. I AS A MOTHER TRUSTED HIS PEDIATRICIAN AND KNEW, FIRSTHAND, THAT HE WAS NOT ABLE TO SIT IN CLASS ALL DAY WITHOUT IT. WHAT'S A MOM TO DO...
Holy Federal time for about a 1000 years, never that about your history.
So your completely out of the judical loop?
So your completely out of the judical loop?
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