My detox process - Starting to feel better - 3rd times a charm?

[JVegas50]

Again, I want to first thank everyone for the support, messages, notes etc.  Honestly, the support is amazing and it makes a huge difference.   I was debating on posting this but I would feel horrible for the people that care and have supported me and are rooting for me.  I’m also not going to pretend or act like I have a certain amount of clean time, when I don’t.  That just goes along with that whole pill taking mindset.  That being said, if you do not know my story, here is a quick rundown.  I have been using Oxycodone for 2 years, about 12 30mg pills a day.  I joined Medhelp a few weeks ago.  I started my 1st cold turkey detox on Sept 30th and I made it 4 days. I then took a minimal amount over 3 days.  I then started my 2nd detox, which I also made 4 days (last Friday), took a small amount over 2 days.  I know that disappoints people and I wish I could say that this is day 7.  Unfortunately it is not and I again, Im not going to lie about it.   Even though I have done less in 2 weeks, then I used to do in 1 day… I know that’s not the point.  The point is to be done!   Soooo.  I’m back at it today. Going on day 2 again. Sometimes I make things more difficult, maybe that’s why I’m going through detox 3 times in 3 weeks…lol.  If you want to hear some good things about this, for starters I actually feel pretty good today. I also do not feel the crazy cravings. My legs are not throbbing much.   Maybe my body is just getting used to not having them.  More importantly and I think this is what is going to make me successful, I’m doing my job just fine without them and I KNOW I can get through the day just fine.  In fact, I’m actually starting to think more clearly… Imagine that!  I’m positive 3rd time is the charm!    Also, I know you guys give a lot of support and you spend your time trying to help.  So understand if you are annoyed by my detox process.   I hope you can see that I want this very badly and I’m not wasting your time.  I plan on proving it this week.  I will post again on day 7.

[JVegas50]

Thanks!!  Yeah, Ive been taking calmagzinc and potassium.  Ive also been drinking Coconut water, which has a ton of potass. Ive been doing the epson salt bathes too.  Have you ever heard of Calcet?  Its a vitamin as well. Someone said its the best for leg cramps and soreness

[JVegas50]

Good point buddy.   And your absolutely right - If I can do it, so can you. Lets do it!!

[Sonrissa]

Congrats on day 4! That, is great! You should start feeling much better, soon. Are you taking Magnesium and Potassium for the RLS? Also, warm baths with Epsom Salts will really really help! Stay strong and focussed, you are doing great!

[georgiaboy91]

Hey thats awesome J! Keep yourself busy this weekend i guess?! haha im on day one and feeling weird but if you can do it i can to okay!

[JVegas50]

Its a miracle!!!  I made it past day 4 finally..lol.  Im not going to get too happy.  If I can make it thru work today, I will have the weekend to just relax. Maybe someday my legs will stop throbbing and moving, not sure when.. hopefully by christmas...lol.

[JVegas50]

How are you doing today Kimby??  We are on round 3 together then..lol.  I hope your feeling ok today.  Mesasge me if you want to talk K

[Sonrissa]

Don't give up! You will make it! Takes determination and strength! Yes, you need to cut ALL your sources, if you are serious! It's difficult, but necessary! Glad you are feeling better! Stay strong and focussed!

[Kimby34]

Hey:) I'm on round 3 myself with Vic's. I'm so disappointed in myself and feel so ashamed. It's nice to hear your story and see how positive you are. I know we can do this. I know I have to! I'm here if you need a buddy.....we've survived it before!

[toothfairie]

Hey J....no one is disappointed or annoyed with you...most of us have been there done it....just hang in there....3rd time charm right????  you can do this....just hang on...the bad stuff will be over soon.  

[laurel453]

being honest to ourselves is the big step towards sobriety, JVegas.. so you are not doing bad here...next one, quitting for good :)... and for staying clean, learning to live life without medicating ourselves... all the feelings shall pass if we wait enough and not hide behind the pills, you can leave behind the fear of living without the pills, yeah... be proactive on this your new life.. good luck !!:)

[ariley13]

Ooh, bad deal with the Vikings! ;)  And how 'bout them Chiefs!! I would just be honest with your friend. If he is any kind of friend at all he will understand and support you. Be careful though. The saying misery loves company usually applies to situations like this, and our friends that use often want to keep us using. You put yourself and your recovery first. You are worth it and you deserve to live a clean, happy life.

[JVegas50]

Bears are good - Chiefs are good and Im stuck with the Vikings..lol

[JVegas50]

Thanks Riley :)  I have cut my "doctor source".  But like last friday, when I was dying I had a friend deliver 3 of them to me.  I have to text him today, saying he cant contact me for awhile. Im just thinking about how to word it, when I tell him.  He is a freind, so Im sure he will understand.  I found an NA meeting for tomorow night.  Thanks again...  Go Chiefs!

[BearsFan1966]

Hey I am here for you! The pain does get easier as the drugs get out of your system we can handle more than we think! I am so glad you went to your dr and were honest with him! You got it this time! And my Bears did great! ha ha

[JVegas50]

Thank you buddy!  I appreciate it.  I did meet with my Doc last week, cut the Oxys off.  I also have a torn ACL, and I got a shot of cortizone.  I didnt want the knee paid as an excuse.  Thanks again Bears.  Vikings got smashed on Sunday... I knew that was going to happen thou

[ariley13]

Thank you for your honesty. I think that is a huge step in the right direction. As addicts, we often hide behind lies. It's so important for us to be accountable. Don't be too hard on yourself about this. It will end up being counterproductive to your recovery. Live and learn. What are you planning to do differently to ensure that the 3rd time is the charm? Are you going to NA meetings? Have you cut your sources? What about reaching out to people on here or a sponsor when you are craving and thinking about using? Just work on your plan and take the steps necessary to ensure success. We are here for you and want to see you do this! Please keep us updated on how you are doing. Take care of yourself my friend and try to keep your head up.

[BearsFan1966]

No one said this is easy, if it was no one would do it! I hope you can do it this time!
I know a lot of people relapse but you HAVE to cut off your sources to be able to get clean! I will not judge you because no one but you can know what is going on. I do know that if you truly want to be clean we are here for you! Keep us posted and I hope the 3rd time is a charm!