My fourth day of withdrawal off of methadone

[snowflake24]

This has been the hardest day yet. I can deal with the sniffles, slight diarrhea, and sneezing. I had energy this morning but now I feel completely drained. It does help to move around, it seems the more you sit around the less energy you have. I still had my bottle of methadone (10mgs) in my lock box from lasts sunday dose that I never took, it was soo wierd.I was standing there, doing the dishes, when all of a sudden it was like the lil devil on one side of my shoulder and a angel on another. What im saying is, my mind started messing with me, telling me if I just drank a lil bit I would feel so much better.....but i knew deep down it would put me back to day one. Sooooo, i walk into my bedroom to open the lockbox with the meds all the way not knowing what I would do once I opened it,,,,,i opened the lockbox, took the bottle out and immedietely flushed it down the toilet, even rinsing out the bottle, boy that was sooo wierd. Glad I did it, though. Does anyone have any advice about getting your energy back or how long I will feel like this? Its manageable, but uncomfortable, if that makes sense. Thanks for everybodys support. If it wasnt for everybody rooting me on, telling me I could do it, I would still be at the methadone clinic.
snowflake

[brian2121]

im on my fourth day off methadone,i say methadone withdrawls are far worse then,fentanal,oxy cotton,heroin,cocaine but i must say that it did help me get clean.i really cant take this pain my knees hurt so much i cant get coffortable,i havent sleept in three days constantly shaking cause i cant get comfurtable.im struggling i just want my energy and sleep back . i had all six carries worked very hard to get cleaqn but now im fu#### going crazy its like one min im fine then the next im punching the walls screaming,all my bed sheets are torn appart cause of my withdrawls its horribale ppl never go on methadone its easy to get off stuff on ur own . but nits up to u if u want to quit drugs and never look back then do it.but if u go on meth not serious abbout quiting DONT

[snowflake24]

thank you.........I recently hit my year mark and for some reason I have been craving and having vivid dreams of using so I think posting and talking about it will help. I also went to a NA meeting this evening. Thanks for your support.

snowflake

[snowflake24]

I am just so happy that I have gotten so much support from everybody. No, I broke up with my bf about 14 months ago.............I think I have been on this sight so much because I just hit my year mark...........I have almost relapsed, been having bad dreams of getting opiates...........I think subconsciously I need the support right now. Thanks for listening. I cut off all drug contacts months ago

snowflake

[clean_in_ks]

Congrats, SNOWFLAKE........so good to hear from you and know that you are still clean!
When I read Nick160's post on this old thread of yours.....at first I didn't realize your last post on the thread was a dang year ago....LOL  It was strange that it was also October.....but last year.  I actually read Nick's post the day he wrote it and reported it as abuse.  Guess the mods didn't agree.
This is a site to help those with substance abuse issues...not promote them.

I'm really glad you are clean and sober a year later....and hope you aren't still having to live with a bf who actively uses opiates.  Keep your guard up and bop back in once in awhile and let us know how you are doing, OK?

[atthebeach]

hi snowflake,
wow good for you. a very big congratulations on your year of sobriety.
I am very happy for you and very proud of you.
it is so great that you checked in on this thread.
what a great testimony, " I WOULDN'T TRADE MY SOBRIETY FOR THE WORLD".
keep on keepin on.
continued blessings,
Debbie

[snowflake24]

Thank you for putting it into perspective gnarly 1. Hope all is well. I had a question. How long did your paws last for you? Just curious everyone is different. Thanks,

snowflake

[snowflake24]

Yes...........looking back I didn't know that for two, maybe two and a half months I went through paws. No energy, very depressed. I thought I was going nuts but it got better. It started out extremely bumpy but now there is just a bump here and there.:) But now I feel a lot healthier, life in general is better. I think doing your research really helped put things in perspective for you (regarding what it does to your nervous system) ect. I'm glad things are going better VICourageous.

[snowflake24]

Wow I wasn't expecting so many comments. As I sit here, feeling ashamed for exploding on the poor guy. I think it comes down to lack of information and ignorance on the subject. If it works for him by all means go for it, but please don't be negative toward people that want off. To each his own. :)

[VICourageous]

PS..I have 401 days off of a 12 year ride with just the dones..more years with the other opiates..My whole life has changed for the best..I can see/think clearly now the fog is gone..ha!!!!

[VICourageous]

Thanks for coming back snowflake. I too was a bit upset..I did not go to a clinic for my Methadone..I was on hydo/oxys before that I decided to go up to the Dones for pain (prescribed)..What a mistake. I was snorting it with adderral (I do not have ADHD) bought it off the streets..The I took a klons at night to come down..If this person would do there homework and find out where and what each and every one of these drugs do to the brain Chems/Transmitters and so fourth and how damaging it is on the nervous system then maybe they would think twice..This is a very synthetic drug..It has no real opium base in it. It does alot of damage to our body parts too. I think it is one of the most evil drugs out here..BUT if he likes it then so be it..They will soon figure it out when they are not thinking with a real brain but a drug brain..I wish you well on your journey.
So true Teri..Way to go girls. I had to bite my tongue on this one a few days ago..Glad you are doing good Snowflake..I have some friends that I avoid these days that are still on it and they are getting more and more spun each day..lol
Bless

[gnarly_1]

Hi well for starters methadone was never ment to be a life long treatment it was designed to give I/V drug user a choice to get clean and work a program to work toward a goal of being drug free so many people have gotten the idea that once your on it your on it for life and the for profit clinics are there to keep you on it for life just so the money does not run out the minute it does they quickly detox you threw a cruel rapid detox and kick you to the street I cringe every time I see this done and also when I see someone hand over there life to this insidious drug. I speak form experience I was a methadone addict for almost 7yrs and at one time thought I would be on it for life just know this is a powerful drug that does affect you in more ways then you think and sooner or later you will need to get off of it we are here to help when your ready good luck and God bless......................Gnarly.............  

[Teri9498]

I agree w/u snowflake!!..I was on methadone 8yrs & they were the worst years of my life...after a few yrs on it, u will totally see what I mean...when ur zest 4 life is gone, u have no ambition for anything, nod off all the time & idk if u know what it does 2 men (ED) after a short time on it!...I couldn't imagine being on that sh*t 4 life!!...it might be a wonder drug 2 u now..but give it a bit & I'll bet u will be changing ur mind!!...& as far as saying u need it like a diabetic needs insulin...ummmm I don't think so...my son is type1 diabetic & he would die w/out insulin...u can't die if u don't have ur beloved methadone!!!!

[snowflake24]

Well that sure doesn't sound as if you support people that cold turkey methadone, huh? Why so judgemental? I don't judge people that are on methadone for life....and your right i should have just quit my opiates and never went to the methadone clinic. However my bf atm would not quit getting opiate prescriptions and i was tired of taking them, so i thought "hey this way i will be legal and get the help i need. And to be honest i wish i never would have stepped into that freaking methadone clinic. It took me 2 months of acute withdrawals and another month of post acute withdrawal syndrome. But ya know what, nick? I WOULDN'T TRADE MY SOBRIETY FOR THE WORLD. I guess you did trade in for the methadone so the best of luck for you and your life long wonder drug. If you cant be encouraging then you are ignorant and niave. Good luck on your methadone for life attitude LOL

[jezz735]

amen, so true

[nick160]

I love my methadone dose every morning. Methadone has saved my life it was a god send. I just dont get why you people get on then whine and cry trying to kick. If you wanted to be compleatly drug free you shoulda just kicked whatever it was that got you to the clnic. I strugled years trying to get clean and withdraw is the easy part. I realized that I have a chemical inbalance. My brain switched off its endorphin production and was probly low to begin with that led me to self medicating and my addiction. I will require methadone for life as a life-sustaining medication. Much like a diabetic will require insolen. I would have never started with out a life long commitment. Good luck with your successful drug-free recovery. Unfortunately countless individuals like my self are greatfull for this wonderfull medication and would eather be dead or in jail with out it.

[snowflake24]

yes, the fact that you have been on it for so long and at a high dose, I would continue dropping slowly, going down as low as you can, without putting yourself in agony....listen to your body, if I had to do it again I wouldnt have changed a thing, I mean, i have a week clean off of methadone!!!!!! yeah!!! Please dont do what i did. I was on it less time than you, and started at only 80mgs, I wish I never would have started the methadone, but hindsight doesn't help now, does it??? LOL I still feel horrible, no energy, exhausted, and i wont stop sneezing!!! Ill keep posting, I hope in a week ill be way better. Patience, patience, patience, i gotta work on that.

[Jenelle2020]

Hey snowflake, glad to hear you are doing better, I think the worst is over for you , you did so well!! I am doing okay, I dropped to 16mgs on Thursday and I didn't feel the drop. I am starting to get anxious about all this as I know my time is coming fast. The fact that I have been on a lot longer than you and at a much higher dose is going to be an issue for me. All I can do is take it one day at a time. I am looking forward to being able to say I have tapered to 15mgs, it's kind of a milestone for me. I know a lot of "methadonians" say they have felt bad at the dose I am at but really I am doing okay, maybe because I have taken such a long time to taper. I am not sure what is going to happen but I am mentally prepared. I hate methadone so there is no fear of me going back on it, and just like  you, no matter what happens I will NOT resort to taking more, no matter how badly I feel. I ordered a book that I heard people talking about, it is called " End Your Addiction Now" by Charles Gant. Some people have found it really helpful. It will be here in a few days and I will have a chance to read it before I do my detox, so maybe I will get some helpful hints from it. Anyway, good to hear from you, please keep posting. I may need your help soon! All the best, Gayle

[snowflake24]

Hi gayle, was wondering how you were feeling today, coming down and all on your methadone, today I am not a emotional wreck like yesterday,,, lol. but it is emotionally and physically draining, but I have come soo far I cant turn back now, nor do I want to. you can do this because I can do this, and theres nothing special about me except I have a strong desire never to touch pills again, ever. And I bet you feel the same way, keep me posted, i know you can do this!!!!

[snowflake24]

Hi gayle, was wondering how you were feeling today, coming down and all on your methadone, today I am not a emotional wreck like yesterday,,, lol. but it is emotionally and physically draining, but I have come soo far I cant turn back now, nor do I want to. you can do this because I can do this, and theres nothing special about me except I have a strong desire never to touch pills again, ever. And I bet you feel the same way, keep me posted, i know you can do this!!!!

[snowflake24]

Wow, that just raised my spirits hearing that. I feel as if my spirit is broken a lil because it is hard to feel bad for days on end. Its emotionally and physically draining, but it will get better in a week or two. I only had one day where I was emotional and crabby and a wreck, that was yesterday. I just wanted off of opiates entirely, enough is enough for me. thanks for your support.

snowflake

[Bonny_T]

Hey just been reading ur comments and i have to say i admire ur bravery to decide to come off meths with no other med help.. i was last on 17ml then switched to subutex 2 weeks ago i could neva imagine coming off meths with nothing it just wasnt an option but you seem like a strong person and i wish you all the luck its a big step uve taken, give ur self a pat on the back and be very proud! :-)

[snowflake24]

it is hard, now im to the point where I just feel blah all the time, crabby and it is wearing on me emotionally. But I have 7 days off the liquid devil handcuffs lol. So in another week hopefully I will feel better than this. I havent thought once about going back to the clinic.....although they called and left a message saying they were going to discharge me and that they hope I am being "safe". they just want their money. Whatever, i can do this, i cant go back no, im way too far in and I have no desire to turn back. THanks for your support

snowflake

[gnarly_1]

Hey Snowflake how goes it today ???things letting up a bit or still the same?? you been doing great keep pushing forward.........Gnarly

[snowflake24]

yes, I would keep tapering down, too if I were you. You have been on it a long time and started at a high dose, be careful with the lower digits, were not allowed to tell people how to taper, just dont torture yourself the lower you get, if that makes any sense. Good luck and keep me posted the lower you get. You can do this!!!!

snowflake