N/A feedback

So I want to start going to N/A to support hubby. I actually want him to go and get a sponsor but he thinks talking about it won't help. Any way, what can I expect out of an N/A meeting? Would I be able to get a sponsor if I'm not the addict? Those of you who have read my posts know that I am trying everything I can to help. I guess I just don't want to waste time in this cold weather going to a meeting if it won't help.

[cathy5841]

i attended meetings for awhile.  you go in and memebers read the cards with N/A info and the 12 steps then they open the meeting for your input...members talk about their feelings and things...i do not think you can get a sponsor, not being an addict...i think meetings will helphim, more than you..if he really wants the help.  they have narc-anon for family members of addicts...that would definately help you sooo much.

[corey411]

I used to go to NA with my son. The speaker meetings are really good for families to attend. I never went to the group meetings because I thought it would bother him and he would not want to talk about things in front of me. They have open meetings which anyone can go to but some are closed and you have to be an addict. I also went to NarNon and like Cathy said, they can support you and teach you how not to enable him....That's harder than you think. As an addict I can tell you talking about your addiction is something that you need to do. I can't imagine staying clean without talking about it. He will not have to talk...He can just go and listen....even when they have topics and go around the room, he can say "i pass" or "i'm just here to listen"  He will be amazed at all of the people who talk about things that he thought only he felt. I went through many relapses before I took the advise that I'm giving...because I'm stubborn. Tell him to go to the meetings and listen for awhile and he will get to the point where he will talk. Good luck and God bless, Corey

[freebird227]

Well I ave attended qiite a few meetings all over the US. Go on line.   and get a meeting directory for your area Each meeting states open or closed. Closed is for those who have a problem with drugs Open is for spouse or anyone interested in NA Each group has its own floormat ie: book sudy,open discussion, speaker, In your area they may have  Nar A Non, there you would find you a sponsor Google Narcotics Anonymous find your state and continue to narrow the search Call the local rehab center, a lot of times they have meetings there.They are monitored by the institution but sometimes that can be a good thing. Remember we're dealling with addicts and some are fresh off the street. Feel free to pm me Good luck

[Michelle_Shawn]

In my experience - meeting makers make it. I have seen people come in off the streets shaking to the bone detoxing, walk into a meeting and find the strength to stay clean and sober. I believe this is a disease that can not be beaten on its own. I get drunk/high but together WE stay clean and sober. Even if you look at these forums, its all about support. Even if your husband is an addict I would recommend trying AA meetings as well. Its the same but different. I know I drank alcoholicly from the day I picked up a drink but it was the heroin that brought me to me knees. I have found more strength and support in AA though. Just try and tell him to keep an open mind. But noone is going to force him into getting sober. If he goes to a meeting for anyone other than himself - its not gonna work. This is a selfish disease and we must be selfish in our recovery. He can't get sober for you - he has to want it. Take care of yourself Al-anon and Narc-anon will teach you how to do so, without being an enabler. Get yourself the help you need and pray for your husband, its all you can do. Step one is about being powerless over our disease but what you learn in the program is you are powerless over  people, places, and things. My sponser has been sober for 26 years. For 23 of those years her husband was active. In God's time he has gotten sober. You can stand by him and take care of yourself.

[Jester2005]

I did look up the N/A site for my area but it confused me because some of the meetings have "codes" that aren't listed in the legend, so I can't tell if they're open or closed... and the number they provide is an automated service. I'm in Canada, BTW.

one more question: is it true that it's religiously-based?

[j34]

What you are looking for is Nar anon it is a support groups for families of addicts. You can not push or direct anybody else's recovery but you can help yourself.I go to Al anon same thing but for alcoholics. All the best.

[gizzy32]

It's too bad he does not realize how lucky he is to have you, I mean your bending over backwards to help him, but it is his recovery and he does not even want to get clean. Like mentioned above, I think you would be better off checking out narc anon or alanon as those are for people with family members that are addicts. There would be many there is the same shoes as you. I don't think N/A would help you, unless he wanted to go with you, which he won't. Here is a link for al anon, not sure if any are in your area, but it's worth a look. I am sorry your so frustrated, but your trying, unfortunately he is not.

http://www.al-anon.alateen.org/english.html

[Jester2005]

so what's the difference between N/A and Narc Anon, or AA and Al Anon? I thought they were the same thing? I just tried looking for narconon and there's none in my city :(  but we do have al anon... will AL ANON really help if I'm seeking help for opiates?

[j34]

It is called Nar Anon.maybe that is why you couldn't find it.As I read your post I thought that you are seeking help for your bf..... is this for your substance abuse as well? If so Na is great it is a 12 step program to teach you how to live life on life's terms without dope.Nar Anon is great too,if you have loved ones with addiction problems.

[j34]

Here is the number for Na in Vancouver Canada, 604 873 1018 it is automated but then it says if you need to talk to somebody push 8? I believe.I don;t know where you are but you might have to dial 1 before the number for long distance but I am sure somebody on the hot line here would help you. Hope this helps..j

[Jester2005]

Thanks, j34... Googled Nar Anon instead and Ontario showed up... I'll just have to go through the links when I have more time.

I am seeking help for my BF who's addicted to perc's atm... I "quit" smoking pot but I'm sure I could get something out of the meetings, too. I haven't had anything since last weekend but I'm still struggling.

[freebird227]

If you are struggling from giving up the dope any dope then you have a place in NA. The readings state that anyone who has or thinks they have a problem with drugs are welcome here. Best wishes and keep us in the loop

[j34]

Yes all the best good job in admitting that you need help and are struggling, reaching out is important and to know that you are not alone we are here for you

[Jester2005]

even it's just pot? I feel that I wouldn't be taken seriously as it's not physically addictive nor a narcotic. I always doubt myself, though. I have such low self esteem.