NO NAME

Let us know how it went at the doctor ...........

[allaboutmary]

Up to the top you go .........waiting to hear from you.  

[No name22]

Hey thanks! I went today it was only 275$ for the apt. and he wants to start me on 2mg at 9 2 more at 10 and if I need a half a hr from there, but he did presrcibe me 30 8mg's but it says on the bottle 2 8's a day so I'm assuming he's going to up it since I have to go back to see him on thurs (another 100$) and I have to call him...To be honest with you guys (those who know me know I've self medicated b4 w/sub) I actually (instead of waiting) took 4mg's at 4 and feel fine! I know the only reason they want you to wait is cause you can go into w/d's, but I never did b4 so I didn't wait..I'm so glad I FINALLY went, cause in less than a week I spent 1k on pills and more just to drive to FL to get them! Also I am the happiest i've been off drugs in the longest time. I pray this will fiannly be it, but it were up to the b/f it wouldn't be. He shoulda went to the apt instead of me he needs the REAL help more than me, but I'm gonna try to go to a NA meeting this week was supose to go to 2 b4 thurs and make hime come with!

[No name22]

Oh and the script was 180ish$ not bad since it will last longer than 5 days :)

[avisg]

I am gald you are feeling ok ,i am really surprised he did not want to watch you take the first dose. Is your BF going to go see him too ? I would check out the NA meetings see what you think.

[No name22]

So am I all he really did was ask when I took my last dose and looked at my pupils and could tell I was w/ding, but new I wasn't fully there. I think he could be one of those lazy dr's and if so thankfully I know enough about the drug and have this site to rely on. Also he said something like he usually thinks long term is better which I agree only cause you have time to get most of everything thoughts cravings ect outa you're system. As of yet no my BF isn't going, but I kinda lied about how much I was using just so I could have him on the same amount as me that way he gets some of the treatment, but without paying...I def wanna check out a na cause we both know my chances on relapsing are HIGH. I need to get all thoughts about pills outa my head I feel fine but wow I'm craving like a SOB I have to start doing activities now since i'm in the country...

[grievingwidow]

I don't think you did the right thing in lying to your doctor.  If you REALLY want to get better and want him to help you, he needs to be able to trust you and he has to know exactly what you are taking and how many.  Anyways, it is the typical thing for an addict to do is lie - and you seem to do it with no conscience.  I think you need to be honest with your doctor  - I know if I were him and found out that you had lied to me, your *** would be out the door.  I don't think you have any chance of making it anyways though if your boyfriend keeps using - I think it's great that you are trying, it is very commendable.  But please don't lie to your doctor anymore, it is part of your addict personality that you need to be trying to change right now.

Good luck.

[wait2long]

You shouldnt be having cravings hun...sub is supposed to take care of that, you need to call your doctor so he can adjust your dose, i had no cravings at the beginning, and i still have none..you shouldnt be having cravings at all.

[allaboutmary]

Wait2long is so right.  No cravings are one of the greatest things about sub.  Please do call the doctor.

[avisg]

yes it would be better  to be honest with your doctor . unfortunately a major part of addictive behavior is lieing . Be aware of that (i am sure you are ,these are things you can work on over the next few months ,the more you start getting into NA the more you will recognize this).

   I am just soooo glad instead of continuing to use and telling yourself you just cant do it that you have started down the road to recovery .regardless of whether bf is getting clean or not YOU can ..this is on you .......
It will make it a lot harder , but right now focus on you getting better then you will realize what will or wont work for you with having a using partner. I will tell you this i went back and forth with smoking for years i would quit and hubby would not. i used this many times as an excuse to relapse ,it was not my fault it his his cuz he did it around me ...somebody once sat me down and said stop blaming everyone else for your relapses .you can quit smoking its your choice to put that cigarette in your mouth not your husband .I listened to that i quit a year and a half ago ....he still smokes .i cant change his behaviors but sure as heck can change mine . ....
YOU CAN DO IT !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[tommm70]

PLease try not to lie to your doctor. I know the cost sucks. I personally feel that type of pain every time I go to the doctor!

and PLEASE remember sub. is NOT A CURE, it is a tool. Sub. alone will not cure an addiction, it just gives you time to make changes in your life. Sometimes that means taking it for 2 weeks, other times it mean taking is for 10 years. Just make sure and be honest with yourself and your doctor.

Good luck to you.

[nuredshuz]

I think she also said she took the sub before going into full wds ~ maybe thats why she's craving, maybe its just the beginning of precipitated wds ?? just a thought?

[No name22]

Thanks for you're comments...I know I shouldn't have lied, but in my defense I don't have the money right now for the both of us to go to the Dr. so instead of him using or suffering I decided to help him. He's not planning on using anymore and neither am I, but i'm sure we will we have umm how many times..ALOT! So in order for the both of us to get clean together and not have pills in my face the only choice I had at the moment was to get him on the sub at the same time so we can do this together. We are actually going to a NA meeting tomorrow night together and he really wants to go so i'm proud of him for doing that much. People who know me ( i've been posting off and on for almost a yr) know that we've started together and will end it together and this is the biggest step we've taken. Not only did we get a dr. but we moved 1000 miles from home and know no one here.

As for my cravings it's probably because my "friend" has been calling me since yesterday and still today with lower and lower prices...