Need Avice (addicton to Opiates)

Hey everyone...Im new to all of this and found the site after I googled  
" how to get clean off of percocet" After reading some of these posts I think this may be a good start cause I surely need to vent and I am crying for help for the 1st time. Here it goes..My names Kristy and Im a serious opiate addict. It started about 2 years ago with a few dental procedures and soo forth. At first I had taken them as precribed and actually didnt even like them much. They had only made me feel wierd. To make a long story short, with time I began taking more and more and now I see no doctors at all but someone very close to me sees them and gets precribed an enormous amount of 10's, 30's and Oxy 80's. Im positive I left some out, I just dont keep track but even me as an addict knows its insane and the doctors are absolutely crooked to do so. Anyway my habit is now extreme. He gives me a total of about 5 80's a day when he has only them left, and Id say when he only has 30's I get approximately 20 a day and when he has 10's I am taking 3 or 4 at a time and with each pill I am taking them every 2 hours like clockwork. Depending on the pill or strength it varies the qauntity but still every 2 hours. My body is on like an internal clock, I dont even have to know the time and when it hits 2 hours after my last dose I start snapping, get moody, have crying fits, cant stop sniffling, get the chills etc. My life is controlled and consumed by these pills. Its at the point I know it has to stop, or I am gonna die. Its cause relationship problems and my marriage is about to fail. I also am a mother and so far I dont feel it has affected my ability to be a parent but I know thats coming. I literally cannot get out of bed if them pills arent close to my bedside with a drink. I have to swallow that first set of pills just to climb outta bed or I will stay there all day. I dont wanna stop, Im dreading it. I dont even like gettin high anymore, I just dont know any different and cant imagine life without it. Im a whole different person without them,IM Miserable without them and no1 wants to be around me but I cannot do this anymore. I need help, Im scared and I am killing myself. I need advice on how to get clean.Please any help or advice would be very much appreciated.Thankyou

[GoingToMakeIt]

What you are describing is typical of how this progresses. First it's fun, then you have to take them to perform every day tasks. Are you wanting to quit or just thinking about it?

[feelingcrazierbytheday]

do you have enough pills to taper youself? MOre importantly do you have the discipline and willpower and motivation to do so?

[GoingToMakeIt]

There are 3 ways to quit. Cold turkey. Tapering down slowly and Medical treatment, usually Suboxone. Quitting is the easy part. Staying clean is the hard part. Counseling or NA is highly recommended.

[Krit722]

At first yes I was just thinking about it but I am absolutely sure now I want to quit, I have too. Its gotten way outta hand. I have to do this for myself, my marriage and my daughter. In response to "feelingcrazierbytheday" I do have enough pills to taper myself off because they are given to me and I pay nothing for them.My husband is who gives them to me which makes the situation much worse, since he pays practically nothing for them because of insurance and he sells the remainder that I dont take and he makes huge profit. He wants me to quit and would be willing to do anything. Problem is he does them just not to extent I do but still he does them and I feel its gonna be extremely hard knowing that and fact that he has them around and even selling them for that matter. Thats something me and him have to discuss because I think that has to stop too although no matter how wrong it is basically being a drug dealer even though he's no like the typical drug dealer cuz he has a great corporate job and we'd be ok without him selling them, just we live a really good life and have all the material things we could possibly want.We are well off esp. for our ages. Its a tough thing, but at the same time I do feel I am soo determined to do this for myself and all the other reasons I need to quit that I could deal with him selling but I know I need him to stop using completely too. Maybe cause Im soo into this acciction most of that might not sound ration and if soo Id like to know. I just really need advice on what is the best method/way for me to kick this habit and be ok. What should I do. I def have the motivation and I hope willpower to do this. This is very important to me. I cant live like this anymore. My life is soo consumed. I just have no clue how to go about this. BTW I really appreciate the quick responses. Also what is the best way to go about the situation with my husband? cause fact is he's really enabling me and Im very much codependant on him.

[Krit722]

I def dont wanna do this cold turkey and I tried suboxone before and I just dont think that was for me. I think tapering down might be my best bet. I really feel I need counseling to do this. I need as much help as I can get.

[Krit722]

I def dont wanna do this cold turkey and I tried suboxone before and I just dont think that was for me. I think tapering down might be my best bet. I really feel I need counseling to do this. I need as much help as I can get.

[feelingcrazierbytheday]

methadone works if u take it for no more than 5 days at one 10mg pill a day.  the rest is cake. well...in comparison.  but if u do it for more than that........you'll wish u never had...so if your willing to get 5, AND ONLY 5 methadone.....take one every 24 hours.....it can be done.....or taper...i've tried both methods....methadone worked for me.  BUt than the next time i did it for 4 months and the withdrawls lasted 3 months....ouch...but when i did it for only 5 days at ONE PILL EVERY 24 HOURS....i had minmal withdrawls by the 6 day and was home free by day 10.  good luck on your endeavor

[GoingToMakeIt]

     If you are able taper, and stick to a schedule than that is a good route. Take it slow. Let your body adjust to each new level. If you are chewing or snorting the pills. That has to stop. With you taking several types of meds. This makes it hard. It would be best if you are on one type so that it will be easier for you to figure out an exact dose and taper. It is late and not too many are on right now. I am not real good with tapers.
     Ask again in the AM, if you don't get answered tonight. I will say that it is doable. The methadone thing might work. I am just not familiar with that route. I do know that  Methadone is horrible to get off of, but 5 days won't get you hooked. I would bounce this off of others too so you will have several opinions to make your decision from.                             Good luck and keep posting.
Welcome to the forum.

[Krit722]

thanks...that might just work out perfect. I actually have about 6 or so methadone in a pill bottle down stairs . I just never really wanted to give em a try cause of stuff I heard. I didnt wanna end up with a worse addiction. I will def give that a try

[Krit722]

Ill  try again in the morning but you have def helped a whole lot.I really appreciate all the advice and Im  gonna give the tapering off a shot along with the methadone. It's gonna be hard, of course but it's gotta be done. In the long run it will make me a better person and alot healthier. I have a whole life ahead of me that Im not willing to give up on for these pills. Anway thanks again. Im gonna try and get some sleep. Tomorrow Im gonna go at this again and see what others have to say too but Im pretty sure I got alot of good information tonight. Im gonna talk to the hubby after work tomorrow and get this plan into action. I wanna get myself mentally and physically better and this is what I gotta do. Have a good night guys!

[LQQKThrewU]

Yes PLEASE come back and good for you that you have the courage to take back your life. Many of us would not be as strong as you given the circumstances you are in. Good luck and welcome here. Hope to see you post in the AM.

[Yoda99]

Hi dear:
   I am so glad you joined us.  This is a great place to come for support, encouragement, and of course information.  I've been clean 11 months and I couldn't have done it without this forum.  I owe so much to the caring people here and to the ones that have left us.
   Stick with us.  We will walk you through it, if need be.
Good luck,
Yoda

[Krit722]

Hey Just thought I'd check in. Thanks soo much, You's have made me feel very at home here. I didnt think I'd come into this and actually feel so comfortable sharing and asking for help...but you have all def. made this soo easy. I plan to start the tapering down tomorrow morning. My husband won't be home till 6 and thats when I'll get to talk to him about this. He has no idea I even wanna quit yet. I figure tomorrow morning is the best time to start this, wake up in the morning and get this plan in action. Im a lil scared but I know it'll be ok. Im gonna be on here through the all thing and Im gonna give insurance a call most likely today and find a counselor close by and make my 1st appontment. I have done soo much damage to my life that I absolutely need it.If I don't do this right and full force I know it's not gonna work and I refuse to give into this addiction any longer. As someone said to me earlier, It's time to take my life back. I have no life anymore outside of drugs. I already cut down slightly..instead of 4 10's at one time (which has been twice today) I took 2 10's. I figure it's a start, hopefully kick starting me into a new mind frame. Ill be checking back in later w/ all of you after the talk and let yous know how that went.
Yous have all been wonderful :)

[Krit722]

Does anyone have any good advice or could give me like a type of schedule to go by when it comes to tapering off??? I think this is where my problem comes in because I dont know where to begin with that. Like I said in my first post, I take them like clockwork every 2 hrs. If Im taken 10s which is for the most part what I take, I take about 3-4 10's (usually schoolbuses) every 2 hours  and I wake up about 8 and I absolutely never get to bed b4 3:30-4 am so I usually take about 20 10's a day.Majority of the time I cant even wait the 2 hours and end up throwing a crying fit and flip out and my husband gives in and gives me more so they end up being more frequent. If Im taken the 30's which is only for about a few days outta the month, I take 1-2 every 2 hours and If Im taking the oxy 80's I take about 4 80's a day(give or take) Im planning on sticking with the 10's for tapering off.  I figure that would be easiest method. I just need some time of plan/ schedule cause right now I dont have a plan but to get clean really. I dont know how to taper off. Anyone who can seriously help me with this Id appreciate it. Im talkin to my husband tonight like I said earlier and Id like to have some kind of plan so he takes this serious and tomorrow when I wake up I know what to do. :) :) :)

[toxictome]

Welcome. Glad you're here. There are a lot of people here to help you.I would taper at least down to a lower amt, then you could ct. As far as the long run, I think your hubby needs to cut clean too. The temptation will bee too great knowing they are around. You say he has a great job and you have nice things....but the tricky thing here is after a time something happens and we start to lose it all....and obviously, dealing drugs is illegal..so we hav eto work on doing the next right thing. I'm not trying to be insensitive, this is how it works...everything is great, and then all of a sudden it's all slipping away....be open to this before you guys hit bottom......Good luck
Keep Posting.

[traveladdict]

You will need allot of desire to get off the pills when you make the jump.  You also need to tell yourself it wont be discomfort free. First calculate the daily dose and cut back  a 1/2 pill per dose and extend your time between doses.  Your husband will need to hold the pills and not give in to you whining/crying. When you are ready and committed you can do it but not before.

[Krit722]

I totally agree (toxictome) It absolutely cant last forever. Ive really been supportive of it because we have just moved and all sooo financially its of huge help...but it cant always go on. Its not worth him going to jail one day, or losing what we have esp his job. I especially agree that he needs to do this with me because if not, I dont know how this could work with them being around esp when I know they are there and Im watching him meet people and I know he's still taking them. Im sure he'll say Ill keep them outta the house and I won't take them and everything else but Im ready for all them responses. None of that will work. In the house or not they are still there and I know it cause Im an addict and either way its not gonna be acceptable, and Id almost be willing to drug test him because he should get clean not only for himself but for me too. Thats what you do when you love someone. BTW thats huge part of what this talk was Im planning on having with him when he gets home from work tonight. Hes the one enabling me, Hes the one Im dependant on and most of all Hes GIVING me the drugs. Its sooo much easier to get high when you get them for free soo he is my target right now. I have to get to him 1st then work on myself. He and I have to be in this together and work as a team. I think he'll totally support the idea and will do what he has to do but ya never know.Thats when I have to make some decisions if he doesnt. I will def be on right after I talk to him about all this and update everyone.Thanks

(traveladdict) That sounds like a great plan and thats what Im gonna do. I can def do this. I will make sure that he understands how serious I am about this and to only give me what is planned to taper me off and than thats it .They just need to be gone after that. My biggest fear is how he handles all this while its going on. I hope he is there to comfort me and help me through this cause I know its gonna be extremely uncomfrotable and difficult...and he needs to do this without giving in. I know he tends to do that so thats why Im gonna make it very clear to him that no matter how much Im freaking out and in pain or whatever the case may be HE Has to be strong for the both of us at that point and SAY NO. Im very much ready to do this and committed to taking back control of my life and kicking this addiction. I will be on here every day of this and Judging by the help,support and advice I have been getting soo far I think Im gonna do just fine.  This is exactly what I need...and I found it in this forum.

[GoingToMakeIt]

Krit, good morning. (West coast guy PST) It sounds like you are getting the info you need. If you are at all in doubt about what to do. Make sure you ask! When we are on these drugs the mind is so foggy sometimes. Again welcome to the forum and Good Luck. Keep posting, it really helps when you are going through it.

[kimmiek]

If you post this as a new post asking about how to taper, you will probably get lots more help,  Ive see quite a few people on here that have made up schedules on how to do a successful taper.  Give it a try.  I bet youll get more responses.  Title it "trying to taper how do I" or something like that. Please get some more advise from the people here that have been where you are BEFORE you try the methadone.  Im not sure but you may be getting ready to jump from the frying pan to the fire with that stuff?  Ask people.  Start a new thread?  

[toxictome]

make sure you post l;ater and let us know how it went.,.then we'll go from there.      good luck!

[Greatgreebo]

Do NOT use the methadone!!!  We can taper you are serious. You are already an addict, don't mess with an even worse drug to get off the oxys.......As for a taper schedule, we can get you one. avisg is a miracle worker when it comes to making schedules. I will have her PM you.

Read...this will give you a starting point:

Time for some technical talk... One of the things which increases "dependence" is a spike in drug blood plasma levels. Addicts do this on purpose to get a "high". They do it by Snorting (Very fast delivery), IV Injections, Chewing up meds and taking on an empty stomach.

The above all produce the most amount of drug in the blood in an attempt to get a buzz. These spikes are one of the reasons we addicts get hooked faster than a COMPLIANT Chronic Pain Patient.

Being compliant means they take only as directed. The goal of compliance is to maintain an even blood plasma at the minimum amount to treat PAIN and NOT to produce euphoria (a high).

Since the blood plasma levels are lower, the levels of dopamine at the synaptic cleft do not spike so the receptor sites do not downregulate or decrease in number in response to the initially MUCH higher level of dopamine released as a result of spiking.

Addictive dosing behaviors, the large doses associated to Spike the blood plasma level, vs the lower low dosing and more often which is the KEY factor to the physical changes the brain makes which cause dependency.

Dependency is the actual physical changes to your body which cause withdrawal. Addiction is the BEHAVIOR of taking the drugs to get high, not as prescribed, and when not needed for clinical reasons. It is the un-manageable behaviors associated with lack of control.

Which comes first... Dependence or addiction? Usually it's addiction, but it can be the other way, but the key issue which causes the progression of addiction are the behaviors.

Addiction is what makes you take more and more, spiking doses, etc. This in turn increases dependence. The higher your dependence the higher the tollerance... Round and round you go. The addiction merry-go-round.

How to break the cycle? The only way is to change the behavior. That is a very difficult thing. Pain is usually a very good motivator. So is Euphoria. When the pain out weighs the euphoria one starts to consider breaking the cycle. Unfortunately the pain being eliminated by the drug is a driving force. Then the addict associated the RELIEF of th pain to the drug instead of the drug being the CAUSE of the pain.

SOoooooooo what to do? Break the cycle.

Many have to hit bottom to do that. That's the point where the pain of using overwhelms the relief of using. It's an emotional point which is different for different people. Not every one has to hit a bottom to quit. The sooner you quit the less pain and suffering you have to experience.

For folks who are on smaller doses and their disease has not progressed very far, they have not felt the extent of pain addiction can cause. Only conceptualizing how bad it can get may not be good enough to motivate a person early in addiction to quit.

Intellectually we know what lays ahead. We hear the truth from others, but yet we continue to use. It is not until we get a glimpse of the pain that lays ahead do we become to believe we need to quit. One HAS to believe that in fact addiction does lead to the loss of everything and eventually Jails Institutions and Death.

Addiction is a lot easier to nip in the bud physically but maybe not emotionally because one has not experienced the pain first hand. Some need more pain than others to quit. Some don't make it and end up end stage and their addiction wins.

If you want to get off of the pills you have to change your behavior.

1) STOP SNORTING your pills!
2) Stop spiking your dose!
3) stop taking enough to get high

You will never quit until you do that. Weather you can or not is up to you.

You have to come to a point where you make the decision you want to quit. The en you have to make a plan then you have to execute that plan. SIMPLE .... but not easy.

The solution from a clinical point of view for you at your point of addiction is so easy. A simple taper, and change the behavior. In short break the cycle.

How to do a taper is easy. Changing the behavior is the HARD part, but you have to want to change.

If you are taking 6 pills a day... then start taking them in even doses and don't take like 3-4 at a time. 24 hrs divided by 6 = 4 hrs. So only take one pill every 4 hrs. Then take 5 pills in 24 hrs. That's 4.8 hrs. Then 4 pills a day... break pills into 1/2's so you have 8 1/2 pills. and take 1/2 a pill every 3 hrs. Etc.

If you can't stick to a taper give the pills to a friend to dispense.

Mean while .. you have to start changing the way you think and the things you do... You should educate yourself... Good place to do all of that is NA or AA. It's FREE and takes up time. It forces you to be doing something other than sitting around with nothing to do and just thinking about using.

It's not the only way, but it's a good place to start. Take what you need from it, and leave the rest.

If you take the same amount or less every day and don't spike your dose you will eventually quit.

30 mg of Hydro can be tapered to 0 in 2-4 weeks painlessly. The PAWS will be minimal too.

The ball is in your court. We can not make you do anything. Only YOU can.

When you are ready is up to you. If you need to stay "out there" using and see for yourself how bad it will get that's up to you.

My recommendation.. Start to QUIT now! It will be a whole lot easier.

[ouchiex]

My biggest advice for tapering is to plan the whole thing in advance on paper. Once I knew I was getting a couple of weeks away from the bottom of the pill bottle, I wrote out a journal with the day, the amount of pills I would take that day, and the amount of pills that would leave me with (like a spreadsheet with 3 columns, all of which were important and helpful) and that way you will know exactly when it will be over, it can ease some fear AND most importantly, you have something to stick to. Its just too easy in the moment to think: dang, let me just take one, I'll pay later, but that's OK. I would try to tell myself: if i don't take one now, its like a gift to my future self, but that didn't work. It took me writing it down and checking every day to make sure that the third column, the one with how many pills are left was correct every single day. Keeps you accurate and truthful with yourself.

[Krit722]

Wow, That was very amazing advice and reading some of that really touched me cause I know its that serious. I want to taper off. I wanna do it right  so I can get clean. My husbands on his way home so I will be updating you on that but for now Im gonna leave saying this, I absolutely adore all of you who have posted. This is a great place and I feel safe here...I will be here every SINGLE day of tapering off and so forth. Im looking forward to going through this together with alot of you because yous are what is gonna keep me sane. (greatgreebo) I'm all for that. Im looking foraward to hearing from your friend and gettin started. Every bit of what you posted about the addict, was like you were talking firsthand bout me soo It just reassures me that Im doing the right thing. thanks...

[hopsing94]

You have made the first step and good for you. You are doing the right thing and yes this place will help you. I know it will be hard but if you really really want this(wich it sounds like u do) it will happen. Only you can make it happen. Desire,discipline and determination. The killer d's will get you through. We are here for ya.

[toxictome]

I TAPERED, I STUCK W/ MY SCHEDULE.  IT TOOK ME 1 1/2 WKS. AND I AM ON DAY 2.  CLEAN!!   ..YOU CAN DO IT..    dig deep and find the strength!!!

1.HOW MANY PILLS ARE YOU TAKING A DAY? # of pills by how many doses/day
2.WHAT IS YOUR DOC(DRUG OF CHOICE)?

It sound sounds like you are determined......keep posting....

[bandnmom]

Welcome and good luck to you. This site help me a great deal when I wanted to stop myself. It definetely makes it alot easier when  you have others that understand to talk to! I'm 6 weeks clean!!

[Greatgreebo]

Read Krit722's original post that started this thread... She lays out her DOC, how much she's on and where she gets it from.
greebs

[Krit722]

Congrats to everyone on here clean, I can't wait till Im in the same boat and able to live my life again. Also to TOXICTOME, I am taking about 20 Perc 10's (so about 40 Perc 5's)a day usually more. I did list that in an earlier post just a GreatGreebo stated in the most previous post on this thread. Everyone on here has really welcomed me with open arms and It's been a great experience on here soo far. I am truly blessed to have found all of you on this site and looking forward to sharing our experiences and getting through this together as well. Still not fully finished with the hubby yet but I will share tonight, so far Im not too happy bout how its gone soo Im sure Ill def need you guys tonight for advice and soo on. Ill talk to you guys shortly.

[hopsing94]

You are doing a good thing. Stick to your guns and stay strong

[angel44240]

I copied and pasted this from my journal.. You may also want to read the last journal I had posted as well.. just to get an idea and reminder of WHY you want to quit.. trust me, it works if you work it!

Opioid withdrawal is not life threatening, but it is not pleasant, to say the least. When you experience withdrawal symptoms depends on the type of opioid you are taking and on how long the opioid stays in the body. For example, people taking morphine, hydromorphone, or oxycodone may experience withdrawal symptoms within 6 to 12 hours of the last dose while people taking methadone will experience symptoms 3 to 4 days after the last dose. How many symptoms you experience, how long you experience them, and how severe your symptoms are depends on your body’s individual response, how long you’ve been taking the medications and the dose and type of opioid. Typically, withdrawal from morphine takes five to 10 days while withdrawal from methadone takes longer.

What can you do to minimize symptoms of withdrawal?
In an ideal situation, a person who wishes to discontinue use of opioids or who must discontinue use because of issues outside of their control would taper their medications under the care of his or her doctor. In other words, the person would slowly and deliberately begin taking less of the medication over an extended period of time so that the body slowly adapts to the reduced dose.

If you are unable to withdraw with the help and advice of your doctor, it’s important to make an effort to slowly reduce your dose on your own, called tapering. Reducing your dose about 25% every day or so generally prevents symptoms of withdrawal.

What can you do to ease withdrawal symptoms if you are unable to slowly reduce your medications?
Drink a lot of fluid, try to stay calm, focus your attention on something distant from you, and keep reassuring yourself that the withdrawal reaction will pass and you will eventually feel better.

Where can I get help?
Go to a hospital emergency room and let them know what medication and what dosage of it you were taking. Call FEMA at 202-646-2452 or the American Red Cross at 866-438-4636 for a location of a field hospital near you, if your local hospital is shut down.

What about the pain?
One of the key symptoms during opioid withdrawal is a state of sensitized pain, meaning your pain may feel more intense or severe. This also will pass with time, and your pain should reduce, after the withdrawal reaction is over.

What about withdrawing from benzodiazepines?
Withdrawing from benzodiazepines can be more difficult than withdrawing from opioids. The symptoms are similar, but are more intense and last longer.

Benzodiazepine withdrawal — like opioid withdrawal — depends on the amount of the medication taken, the length of time a person has been taking the medication, and which benzodiazepine the person is taking. People taking short-acting benzodiazepines will have withdrawal symptoms sooner than people taking the longer acting ones.

The best way to avoid serious withdrawal symptoms is to reduce the amount of medication you are taking or how often you are taking them before you run out. Cutting the amount by 25% per day or an additional 25% every other day is fairly rapid and may result in some withdrawal symptoms, but it is better than suddenly stopping them when you run out.

Blessings!
Alli

[StaggerLee]

Keep fighting the good fight and as I always say:  when you get confused listen to the music play!

[Coalregion]

I'm on day 6 Cold Turkey after 3 solid years (every day) of percoset and fentanyl. You CAN do this.It'll get worse before it gets better (for a few days) but it WILL get better buddy, trust me. 8>)

Hang in there,
Gary

[GoingToMakeIt]

You are being blessed with a wealth of information. That is so good. Are you set to go now? Taper plan in hand. Determination at your side.
Just remember that the taper plan is so you can still function, while you are tapering. So if it gets real bad. Level off a day or so. Let the body adjust to the lower levels. Then taper some more. Good Luck. We will be here for you.

[Krit722]

!st off to Nauty One I am entitled to my opinion and your entitled to yours, If you have nothing productive to say than frankly there was no need for you to reply to my post but like I said your entitled to your opinion, A DRUG DEALER IS A DRUG DEALER AND THATS THAT. I in no way am coming to his defense and I am going to put that to a stop as I have stated many a times in this thread and if for some reason which I highly doubt He decides to keep doing what he's doing and not become a good healthy support system to me than thats when I have a decision to make on if he's really worth having in my life then and as far as Im concerned my health, sobriety and well being are much more important than having someone in my life that will only interfere with that and bring me down. He has enabled me and only helped worsen the situation.Although I am responsible for my own decisions and obviously me being an addict tried rationalizing alot of things and only looked out for myself. By no means am I a saint or right and thats exactly in part why I am an addict. AS for MY OPINION on what he does, I do feel theres a bit of difference between some ghetto dealer standing on the corner and what he does because see I know him not you and hes not all about dealing. However I am not stupid or anyway sticking up for him or sayin it is right by any means.Like I said a dealer is a dealer and in no way is that right or a situation I want to be a part of nor do I want to go on anymore not only for myself but for him and our family.It is not worth going to jail for..or losing what we have...or evenhelping other people destroy there own lives with drugs.I want no part of that and I believe our love and family will be enough to make him stop. I said what I said and I do not take it back...but for the most part thats not what this is all about.I am taking the necessary steps to put an end to that and do right for my situation. Im hardly patronizing the fact believe me. This is about me getting clean, not what my husband does because fact is Im not my husband and he will not lose me over money that will not always be there and we actually just had our 1st conversation pertaining to this and its already been agreed upon that it's over. By tomorrow I will have a plan and schedule for tapering off (thanks to Greebo and Christine, whome have really been a Godsend) and I am doing it. Im taking back control of my life and my husband will be there doing it with me. Im sorry if what I said irritated you or bothered you in some way, I understand and thats your right just like It was my right to say what I said it being wrong or not. That was my feeling at the moment and it was said. I am not exactly in a clean persons head right now and not even with the judgment I had before drugs consumed my life, maybe you are and if soo Congrats and thats wonderful. Anyway thats all I have to say on that, To everyone else THANKYOU from the bottom of my heart for everything. Yous have been incredibly awesome and majorly supportive. Like I said earlier, I cant thank yous enough and Im looking forward to talking to each and every one of yous from here on out and sharing our experiences together. With this type of support, I can absolutely do this and I cant wait!

[angel44240]

He's absolutely right! Your body will set the schedule for you, pretty much! When you taper/wean off of something, you have to listen to your body SOME- meaning, for EXAMPLE, if  you're taking like 6 Vics a day- you have a schedule to taper down to a half of a pill every three or four days- you're on day 4 of tapering to a half, and you're body still hasn't adjusted to it, and your schedule tells you that you have to taper down another half the next day, because the 4 days is up, it's not gonna work..
Taper down to the tolerant level, FIRST; As SOON as you feel your body has adjusted to the reduced dose, taper again! Repeat those steps.. until you get down to nothing, or if your bottle is EMPTY, then talk to your doctor about the Thomas recipe (see GoingToMakeIt's journal) so you can finally cold turkey. There's non-addictive meds out there that will actually help with withdrawal symptoms.. If you think you can rough it for three or four days, than do it! Just makes you stronger and you'll be off of the meds FASTER!
I tapered from 3 Ultram a day (I know it's not much, but I was on it for three long a$$ years too LONG!).. I went from 3 pills a day (50mg each) down to 2 pills a day for like a week- I tried pushing it after the first 3 days, sticking to my schedule, and it literally threw my body into shock! (Of course, not in all cases this will happen- everyone's body IS different) Avisg gave me advice on how to do it, and it worked! I had nearly 100 pills left, AFTER I finally tapered down to 3/4 of a pill a day, flushed the dam things down the toilet, then went cold turkey, ONLY with the help of a Catapres patch- I have moderate heart and blood pressure problems, and tapering too fast didn't agree with me, so that's the first reason I slowed myself down, THEN when it was time to stop altogether, I used the patch that my doctor prescribed me. I only used the patch for two days, and took it off.. I was fine after that..
Quite frankly, it all happened so darn fast that I can't believe it's even OVER with already! You won't even remember all of this about a year or two down the road! lol.. Well, of course you WILL, but you won't be dredging on it! Trust me!
We're all here to listen.. Blessings!
Alli

[Krit722]

angel44240...Thanks for pasting that from your journal. That post was extremely informative and good to know. I will definetely refer back to that.  Yous have all been very supportive, Thankyou

GoingToMakeIt... Yess Ive absolutely been blessed with tons of help and support as well as an abundant amount of information. Im soo pleased with all the quick and totally helpful responsed. You were def one of the 1st people I got to talk to here and Im looking forward to talking more with you. I must say you seem to be an incredible person and I wish you the best! Thanks

StaggerLee..Pretty funny you said that cause Im sitting here doing just that and have been for most part of the day, It's been making this stressful time much more peaceful. I appreciate it...Theres a song in particular by Blue October about Addiction I dont know if you have hear of it. I will look for the name of the song and lyrics and try to post them. I think you should check it out, Its been pretty comfoting to listen to. Good Luck to you as well.

Coal Region...Congrats on Day 6 of your recovery. I wish you the best, I can only imagine how hard its been for you going cold turkey. I dont know how you do it but you must be an amazingly strong person. I know cold turkey just isnt for me, so thats why I opted for tapering off after getting soo much help and advice by the other wonderful people on here. A few in particular have really been a blessing, I gotta say. I feel the same way as you, You really have to go through the bad to get to the good and its all very much worth it in the end. Thanks... Good Luck with everything.Stay Strong. Feel free to message me whenever.

[hopsing94]

If you guys are gonna be able to do this you are gonna have to at some point stop getting the scripts filled and as long as you can get them filled it's gonna be harder. Just something to ponder. I may have missed something earlier in the thread about this so forgive me if I did. I just know from experience if it available it is very hard to stop. I just want you to succeed,

[GoingToMakeIt]

Krit, i do believe you will make it this time. I sense that determination in how you speak. IMO this is one of the most important parts to getting and staying clean. Our minds are a powerful tool.

[Krit722]

AvisG is coming up with a tapering off schedule for me as well, I plan on starting on that tomorrow and sticking to it. I know its not gonna be easy. It wasnt easy gettin to this point and thats with getting high all day so I can only imagine it without the pills but I am ready to take it on. Im ready to get clean and get back in control of things, I want me back ..the person I was before all of this and the addiction took over. Hopefully I get that back and even be a better stronger person having gone through all this. Im looking forward to being clean and living a normal life where Im able to do simple things that a normal young woman does that I just havent been able to do anymore because my life is completely gone due to addiction. Thanks,Krissy

[Krit722]

You are completely right, and that is something we discussed not only here in the thread but my husband and I as well, Obviously theres only soo much we could discuss in one night and some stuff just accidentally got overlooked when we got deep into conversation about everything else but that is something I do know, the scripts are done. There will be enough to wean me off and then thats it. The supply will be gone. Thanks

[Krit722]

Very True...Its and incredible thing and a terrible thing to waste.Im glad you see how determined I am in this fight, because I absolutely am. I will not let this take control of me anymore. Im ready

[toxictome]

I'm glad the talk went well...get ready to start your're taper and keep us posted. I am so proud of you...you are taking the first step ...into the rest of your life.

[Krit722]

im happy too...i was pretty nervous about it. Im absolutely ready to taper off now and I will be posting through all of it. Thanks I can honestly say Im proud of me too and thats the 1st time I could truly say that in a very long tim

[Krit722]

im happy too...i was pretty nervous about it. Im absolutely ready to taper off now and I will be posting through all of it. Thanks I can honestly say Im proud of me too and thats the 1st time I could truly say that in a very long tim

[hopsing94]

Thats good to hear. Krissy it's gonna be hard but you sound determined. I have tapered before and it is almost like a slow death. I know you want it overwith now but you will need to take it slow. The thing about tapering is it's like dieting if you attack it to fast you end up worse than you were. Be patient with it and take it slow. Ease yourselves down and if you get to a point where you pretty low in your does maybe then just go for it c/t and get it over with. We will be praying for both of you. We are here for you guys all the way. I can tell your from pa.. I am originally from pitt and I used to say yous guys and yinns all the time. It's funny to hear that again. Good luck and remember we are here for ya.

[toxictome]

You should be proud of yourself...it takes alot of courage to stop using...it will be hard.....but you can do it.You sound strong willed and I remember we always say in AA...  "pain is the touchstone of all growth.   I'm rooting for you!

[angel44240]

You're definitely on the right track.. Sound exactly like me when I finally stopped taking the 'evil pill'.. (what my mom used to call them) If it weren't for everyone here, I don't know if I would have made it! lol.. they helped tremendously!
Keep us posted daily and let us know how you're doing,k?
Lots of Love!
Alli

[bandnmom]

Like I said b4 good luck. I also am a mom and I found myself scheduling things around my addiction. Plans to go to the zoo...only if i had my pills etc....Now i am finally seeing the light at the end of the tunnel. I am a drug free functioning mom again. You are lucky you have a husband that will help u threw this. When i came clean to my hubby he changed. He treats me and talks to me like s**t now. I can't stand it. But i am not giving in. I'm staying strong. I would love to take a pill or 2 or 3 but I have come so far and i never ever want to go back. When i have a bad day i go look at my 2 little kids sleeping and i remember why i got clean. Its a way to help me remember why i need and want to stay clean. My kids need me and if my hubby doesn't change i'm going to end up leaving and doing this all on my own and then they will really need me.the clean mom that they deserve!! Look at my journal its has my story.

[Krit722]

Everything you described is pretty much me, My husband is supporting me as far a weaning me off but I gotta say tonight I had to listen to alotta negative comments and that better change too or I will leave myself. I had to head.."heres your drugs since thats all you f'in care about" and alotta other inconsiderate,very ignorant things when fact is he has alotta nerve and I feel soo hurt I even talked to him now cuz here I am pouring my heart out to him (the one giving me the d*amn things btw) and telling him I wanna better myself and get off drugs for good. Do it the right way so it works and get my life back and then he could say that to me..It was so cruel and like a slap in the face. I hope he atleast keeps his word about everything else but we'll see.I have to worry about me though and not stress myself more about him or our relationship as you should. Its takes alot to do that sooo I know how much it hurts to be treated horrible and differently. I wish you the best. Feel free to message me whenever because really we have experienced and/or are expieriencing alot of the same things and it would be nice to have someone else to talk to about it and not be judged. I myself am doing all the same things, I couldnt even take my kid to a birthday party at Chuckee Cheeses 2 wks ago without having a bottle with me and extra pills in my system before I even went. Its really tough and its soo sad. I cant live like this anymore. Goodluck with everything, Ill be thinking of you. Thanks soo much for the post. KIT

[zzzaaaccckkk]

incredible what an amazing read. The knowledge and caring in this post was exactly what it was made for. I love learning and reading the hope u just gave out. Great job!!

[Avalancheblanche]

My husband didn't get it either.  I COMPLETELY freaked out on him after I told him of my problem.  He had no clue about addiction.   I skimmed all the posts and may have missed some stuff, but, maybe, your husband really has no idea about addiction.. Maybe he thinks he does.  I told mine to go onlline and research.  He still doesn't get it, but , has a better understanding of it.  
If he is not supportive, a friend?  I took a HUGE  risk and told my best friends.  It was gamble.  Someone is out there to support you.  If it's not physically, it's us.  Keep posting.

[hopsing94]

Hey krissy I just read your last post. You may not want to hear this but here it goes. If he is the one supplying and using also and he's treating you that way knowing you want to get clean. Hun he does'nt. He told you what you wanted to hear when you talked but I don't think he's ready. I have been in your shoes and when I was ready and the other person I was taking them with wasn't I got the same treatment as far as to stand in front of me and dangle a pill on their tongue in front of me and then eat it. Krissy this might be a little harder to do than originally thought. I know how bad you want to quit,just not so sure your boyfriend is dear. My heart and prayers go out to you.

[Krit722]

havent been on all day..been basically sleeping the day away, I havent been feeling too well. I def agree fully with what you said in that last post. After today especially I know this isnt going how I hoped at all. I having been having a really tough time with him and don't even wanna be around him. I cant really get into it now cause I really just wanna crawl back into bed but I hope to get back on here tomorrow and be able to talk about all this. I really need to vent, the worst thing for me right now is to bottle all of this up. Thanks soo much for your help, Ill be talking to you soon.

[jim811]

Hi Krit,

I'm day 6 clean now after a 3.5 week taper off percs and fentynl patches. Everyone's advice is right on here...

1. Write down your taper schedule
2. Listen to your body
3. Take care of yourself, eat good, flush your body with fluids, exercise if you can, etc.

NOTE - I'm no doc but have went through this a couple of times so my advice is just personal experience.

I found that I could jump off my taper when I was down to 4 1/2 pills each day...1st couple of days were a bit rough but exedrin helped.  

Lingering effects:

1. Emotional but realize that is my body changing again
2. Sleep - I take a couple of Execdrin PMs for sleep eac night - definitly helps

Do I miss the opiates? You bet but I began exercising on the 3rd day off opiates (I wouldn't exercise while on them) and just as I set goals for tapering and getting off, I set goals for exercise now...former jock :-)


The best feeling and I'm sure many here can attest to this - your life is not revolving around a pill.  You can go anywhere and do anything without worrying if you're covered .. LOL...I remember that vividly.

Take Very Good Care & Good Luck,

Nick

[penallen]

for some reason I have found myself reading about your addiction. I  to am an opiate addict, but there is hope I have been in recovery for 7.5 months. After an 8 year run on pills, pain patches,the strogest of strong. As long as you have access to these pills you will never be able to get clean no matter what! I cryed at night, i didnt want to live like this no more, i to couldnt get out of bed w/ out pills. It was at the point were i needed pills just to feel normal. If you are truly as bad as you say you are you cant do it by yourself. I was able to get into a womens recovery services in santa rosa california, I was able to take my daughter w/ me. If your husband is willing to do what ever it takes to help you, like mine was than you should check into a rehab, truly if you want to fell physically and emointally,spiritually better this is the only way!!