Needing support from Tramodol withdrawls

[pillsnomore]

Seeking support from any and all while going through the hardest thing ive EVER had to go through! Thats getting off this devil pills called TRAMODOL...... Im stopping pretty much cold turkey from 36 pills a day(yes what ive worked up to) to pretty much nothing at all. I really am looking for support and understanding from people in my shoes or who have been there!!! Going through this is the hardest thing in the world, but believe it will be much easier with friends who "understand"!!!!!

[pillsnomore]

AHHHHH When will I EVER sleep again? GRRRRRRRR

[pillsnomore]

David..... How wonderful is that? For those words to really stuck with you..... I love my children more then anything on this earth, but after being in such a "fog" for so long I never realized that they really never had their "real" mommy!!! I always thought I was doing the best for them... However i was SOOO wrong!!! Do you know how long its been since mommmy really LAUGHED with them, Played with them without really "being there"!!! Oh how I see it now! And the number 1 thing i see now is that I was the most SELFISH person in their lives to worry about Me all the time! And its so true..... How could I be soooo selfish and leave them here without their mommy!!!!! This wonderful change has finally made me realize not only am I the number 1 person that loves them the most, however I am one of their number 1 person they LOVE the most also!!!!  

I also want to say I am here if you need me... Anything at all!!! If you need a friend or just need to talk, you can pm me...... Having the strength and support of all the wonderful people on here is whats keeping me going!!! What a blessing for such wonderful people like you...... And better believe im going after my life..... ALREADY takin it back!!! Im finally getting to be the sweet, caring, loving, fun, energetic woman I always knew I was!!! Just had a ruff obstlical to overcome, WHICH HAS ONLY MADE ME A BETTER STRONGER WOMAN TODAY!!!!
CONGRATS to you as well..... How very PRoud you should be:)) Keep smiling friend

[hiskidd]

Your post made me tear up missy! :) "...To leave my children...without the number one person who loves them the most..." hit me where I needed to be hit. I've been depressed enough at times to want to leave, but I will hang on to your words and am making a new start today with my mindset. I too want to live... to really live "and give them the best of my life." (That's a quote from "Lead Me" by Sanctus Real. It's a cool song all about family.)

Anyway, I'm here if you need me. You sound really good. And another great thing going for you is that you are young! In ten years, you will still be young. Go after your life. It's yours. Take it!

in Him,

David

[pillsnomore]

Hi!!! Thanks so much for the prayers...  It has been one heck of a journey let me tell you.. I had only tried detoxing 1 time before and it didnt go to well.. I literally thought I was gonna die!!! This time however is soooo very different... I knew If I didnt make a change real quick things wouldnt go to well for me!! Im taking this as my last and final chance to LIVE LIFE AGAIN....

I have been doing the exercise thing as well... Yesterday the 4 of us went for a walk with the dog. THe weather finally getting alittle nice here helps alot. The sun really works wonders I believe.. But yes I totally agree that just getting up and moving really does a body good...

Wow 3 little ones, and one on the way.. What a blessing that is!! See you to have soooooo very much to live for sounds like. This time thats what totally made a difference for me. All i had to do was think about my beautiful children and how SELFISH it would be for me to leave them here on this earth without the number one person who loves them the most. My children and husband are my entire WORLD!!!! Im living every single day for them from here on out!!! These past years I never realized how i hadnt really been there for them. Mommy was always in a fog however I never knew that!

To enjoy life again is the most amazing thing on earth... THe little things I have sooooo taken advantage of..... Such as the smell of this wonderful fresh air, the sounds of my boys laughter, the beautiful stars in the night, the beautiful stars at night!!! Everything is so ALIVE again for me!! I will and am doing this, for I know life is soooo much more fafilling and treasured..... The past is just a memory to me, and hopefully very soon a FAR memory to me!!! TODAY IS BETTER THEN YESTERDAY AND TOMORROW WILL BE EVEN BETTER THEN TODAY.........

Thankyou my friend for the care and the extra encouragement I sooooo very much need and appriciate... God Bless You :))

[hiskidd]

Hi! It sounds like you've been on quite a journey! I'm praying for you, literally!

You've said a few times that you've been here before (detoxing), so you know that the physical is doable then the mental really kicks in. I was wondering if you were able to exercise at all, maybe just walks around the block or on a treadmill. I was able to get on a treadmill today after a time off because of a cold, and it made such a huge difference. I only walk about 1.25 miles, but that time of getting my heart rate up for at least 20 minutes helps me feel better, think clearer, and even deal with my back pain better. The depression and anxiety really subside after about 10-15 minutes in, and it starts me on more positive trains of thought.

Anyway, I have 3 kiddos too, and one on the way (my wife is due in July :) I know - not "think" but KNOW you can and will do this. This stuff will be so far in your rearview, and Go will bless you. He already is :)

Take care and be encouraged!

David

[pillsnomore]

Day 6 Today.... Started out very energetic!!!! Feeling alittle down tonight!!! Things have been soooo wonderful for me, but just kinda feeling alittle depressed now..... Achey again, and kinds sad :(

[pillsnomore]

And today is day 5 for me...... Im just so giddy and been smiling ear to ear with happiness!!! All the emotions and senses you get back are just CRAZY!!!! Ive been doing awesome besides a few symptoms still here and there.. Wanted to know if anybody going or have gone through TRAMODOL withdrawals ever have problems with their eye sight being blurry and not being able to focus? And also having the "sneezes" ALL DAY LONG!!!! Just a couple weird symptoms Im experiencing now!!!!  Would like to know If im not alone..... But other than that ITS ANOTHER WONDERFUL DAY!!!! Everyday has gotten better!! And better believe Im soakin up EVERY min of it!!!!! :))

[pillsnomore]

And today is day 5 for me...... Im just so giddy and been smiling ear to ear with happiness!!! All the emotions and senses you get back are just CRAZY!!!! Ive been doing awesome besides a few symptoms still here and there.. Wanted to know if anybody going or have gone through TRAMODOL withdrawals ever have problems with their eye sight being blurry and not being able to focus? And also having the "sneezes" ALL DAY LONG!!!! Just a couple weird symptoms Im experiencing now!!!!  Would like to know If im not alone..... But other than that ITS ANOTHER WONDERFUL DAY!!!! Everyday has gotten better!! And better believe Im soakin up EVERY min of it!!!!! :))

[pillsnomore]

Goodness all the senses you get back are so unbelievably AMAZING!!!! Feeling the warm sun on your face, hearing the birds chirping, smelling the fresh spring air, Oh how ive missed the LITTLE THINGS IN LIFE!!!!! TODAY IS BETTER THEN YESTERDAY AND TOMORROW WILL BE BETTER THEN TODAY!!!!!!!!!   :))

[pillsnomore]

Its all you wonderful people keeping this spirit ALIVE!!!!! I cant take all the credit..... lol Thanku for people like you:))

[Dav125]

Keep that spirit alive! Thats great!..:)

[ImDONENoMore]

You go girl!!!  Congrats on the 4 days because it IS a big deal!!  :)

[pillsnomore]

WHOOOO HOOOOO DAY 4!!!!!! To me day 4 is a HIGE accomplishment! Being I havnt missed 1 single day with taking my trams in the past 5 years..... Is it uncomfortable? Absoulutely it is.... But Today is better then yesterday, and tomorrow will be better then today! I can only go forward in feeling better, NOT WORSE!!! The aches and pains are MUCH more tollerable!

Ive even been pushing myself to "get up" and do something. Whether its a small tast for just 10 min.. It helps, it really helps alot! Getting your body moving, and occupieing your mind is the best thing to do! I have even found that even though you dont want to get up let alone go out, that if you go for a car ride, just for 10 min it really does wonders....

Its so unbelievable to me how "1 little pill" can take away so much of your life!!! I always thought i was on top of the world, that i could do anything while "running" on the pills. I thought i was invisible I guess..... But once you get out of "the fog" so I call it, then You start to realize just how Worthless you were.... Its so nice to finally be "present" in my familys life just in these past 4 days.. Even though I still dont feel all that great, Im very much enjoying the things in life that have been taken for granted for such a long time!!!  And I will keep enjoying everyday from here on out!!!!!

[pillsnomore]

Thanku sooooo much for the comment!!! Its awesome how our possitive words have made u think about dropping the trams!!! I started out years ago with the regular 1 or 2 tabs once or twice a day, and after so very long i had to keep "uping" my dose to control my pain... Well needless to say after 5 years on the "devil pills" i was up to 30-40 50mg trams a day..... Ive been sooo unblievably fed up with living my life this way anylonger... So i put my foot down and threw them all away!!! It is the hardest most painfull, uncomfortable thing ive ever done, but sooooo worth it!! If you are having throughts of stopping now with only 3 or 4 tabs a day... PLEASE DO IT!!!!! It only gets much much worse....

I am still very uncomfortable during these withdrawals, but having the right attitude and the help and support i have found with this site is a god send!!! I have come to realize just how "important" I am to this world, and expecially how important I am to my husband and my wonderful boys!!! So not only am i doing this for myselft.. But the 3 most wonderful men i have TO LIVE FOR!!!!

Good luck to you and stay strong.. Were all here for you if you need us:))

[ImDONENoMore]

You are SO right - you do have to become your own best friend during this time - something we should have done a long time ago huh?  But it's true - I often say we should treat ourselves the way we would our favorite person in the world.  I definitely agree with you on that one!  And I did respond to your note - so check your inbox when you get a moment!  See you soon! :)

[pillsnomore]

We really do have soooooo much in common!! Crazy world isnt it? My husband is my number 1 support! But man oh man is it very comforting to know I have somebody out there that is "all the familiar" with my life!! My husband is wonderful, but hes never had an addiction of any sorts. So as much as he's helping me through this and keeping me oh so strong, he doesnt acually "know" what im going through. I mean he oviously see's the physical part of what im going through, but has nooooo idea otherwise! And to have somebody who does is soooooo comforting to me:)

And I totally know what your talking about with my husband being so proud of me!! For these past few days, I have been told how wonderful i am, how truly proud he is of me. And he hasnt stopped.... It makes me feel so unbelievably strong, and u know what? makes me feel just as proud! Praise really does work wonders!

I am def trying the epsom salt today! Thats one thing im not worried about "using" to make me feel even alittle better! Thats great advice thankyou.... Yup im forcing myself to eat well, good nutritious foods, being I havnt in so long! And its soooo funny you say that about your husband calling to make sure you were eating... Mine has done the very same. The little reminders to drink water, the texts or phone calls during the day to "check on me" and remind me of the little things i must do!!!

I am staying very strong, and will hang in there for I know what i want out of life now!!! And its to be a better wife, mother, daughter, sister, and friend to everyone i care so much about!!!! Expecially to myself..... whos finally gonna start thinking about me a little more everyday now:)

[ImDONENoMore]

True - we really start to appreciate everything again - and my husband was the same way.   He was so great, especially those first few weeks as he would do the shopping for us and make sure we had plenty of healthy juices in the house - the smoothie nutritional drinks, yogurt, rotisserie chickens, basically just the healthy and the comfort foods.  I remember I was actually in bed those first couple of days and he would keep checking on me - and leave glasses of juice on the nightstand for me so when I woke up it would be the first thing I would take in.  And he would call a lot to make sure I was eating - SO sweet.

As I said, we are very lucky and with these great husbands of ours.  I was so grateful for his support and that support only furthered me along as I was getting well.  And I also remember how proud he was of me and actually, still is.  That only strengthened my resolve as I know your husband must be doing the same for you - along with those precious little boys of yours!

I think it's so sweet that he left those notes for you - and he's SO right about the water thing - the more you drink the water, the more you are ridding your body of all the toxins.  And I also found the epsom salts (shower or bath - with showers I would just use them as a "scrub") - but I remember reading how those salts help rid your body of the toxins too through your skin (our largest organ).  And they also provided a lot of pain relief for me too.

I'm SO glad you're getting through this slowly but so well.  Hang in there and stay strong!  I'll look for you in a little while.  :)

[pillsnomore]

OMG...... Thats to weird! You know I used to be the girl who had to get 8-10 glasses of water everyday. It was very important to me, and I also craved it alot! But in the past i dont know how many years, i would maybe drink a half a glass a day. If that!! I would mainly have my coffee, or energy drink!!! Hardly ever had water.... So yes it is soooo funny how these simple things are so great again! My husband is the greatest too:)) I woke up this morning and he had already left for work, and I have about 5 notes placed around the house that reads "drink water"....  It really will work I think, because everytime I see one i wanna grab a bottle of water for sure!! Im very fortunate to have such a wonderful man.... see all the more of a reason to get my life back!!!! WOW today will be a good day i believe! No im not feeling great, but my attitude is and my minds made up!!!!!!! Thankgod for another day  :-))

[ImDONENoMore]

Definitely!  Back to the basics right? Isn't it funny how these simple things are so great again?

[ImDONENoMore]

Absolutely - the clarity that comes with getting clean allows for changes to your lifestyle in all kinds of ways and that includes taking better care of yourself!  And I too lost a lot of weight taking this poison - weird that you should say how you could live on a piece of fruit for the whole day - ME TOO!  And my appetite returned big time after I quit - and that eventually balanced itself out too.  But they say any opiate robs our body of a lot of nutrients so eat as much as you can - your body is probably starving for it.  So it's all good!

[pillsnomore]

OH and LOTS and LOTS of water!!!! Something i failed very much to think about before!!! Its soooo amazing what alittle H2O will do for you :))

[pillsnomore]

Thanku for the advice..... once again! Its really weird this time around, I havent put anything what so ever in my body to help with anything... The last time i went ct(which was only once in the past 11 years) i was looking for any and everything to help me through the hell that came with it... This time i havnt wanted anything! Ive totally kicked the pills and havnt taken anything to lessen the symptoms! I have been taking vitamins and eating very well! Something I havent cared to do in these past years. I have always been a "tiny" girl, but from being on this nasty drug for so long im even smaller! I have lost about 30lbs on this nasty drug. Going everyday with noooo appitite what so ever. I would usually grab a peice of fruit and have that the entire day...But now oh my!!!! lol I accually have an erge to eat! So yes the foods and the vitamins is all im doing! Starting to really "care" to take care of this body.... After all its the only 1 ive got, and if I want to be here for my wonderful family, then by all means I better start taking care "of me" for once!!!!

[ImDONENoMore]

Melatonin for sleep issues helped me a lot - maybe not so much in those first few days but it did allow me to sleep a little bit (sometimes only a 1/2 hour at a time but as I'm sure you know it was better than nothing!) so maybe they would help you too?  And I agree - the senses returning was so amazing.  Glad to hear you're hanging in there and staying strong!  And I bet it is really amazing to be able to be so "present" for your boys.  They are VERY lucky to have you!  :)

[pillsnomore]

Well today is day 3, oviously I had a restless, sleepness nite! But im hanging in there. Acually last nite i motivated myself to just get up and do stuff. I did dinner last nite, and the cleanup, helped my boys with their homework, and ever got to sit with my little men and read books last nite.....  HOW WONDERFUL IS THAT!!! Of course im still feeling absoultely terrible, but you know what? Last nite was the first time in I dont know how long that I had acually a clear, non foggy head..... Its sooooo amazing what u take for granted, such as smells, touch, taste, sight, and Most of all for me was the LAUGHTER from my children..... Today will be a good day!!! Crappy yes, but 1 day closer to getting my WONDERFUL, BLESSED life BACK:)) And just to hear that laughter of my boys pushes me EVEN harder to get back to "me" even more so.......