Not Again!

[catmagnet]

Does anyone honestly know the difference between alcoholism and a drinking problem? My hubby has been an on and off drinker for years, he just called me and has been banned from yet another bar in town. I'm going to worry til he gets home now. I know most people do drugs, does anyone know about alcohol? I don't have a problem with it, so I really don't know.

[worried878]

complicated and diverse opinions on that topic...i have come to the conclusion that if the substance is affecting my life in a negative way on a regular basis...it needs to go from my life...now this could be alcohol if i got  a dui or 2...fired from a job or 2, a wreck or 2...things causing problems also like violence or discord at home....if .myi boyfriend even starts causing me so many problems in my realtionship that it affects my job, my friends, my kids, my own happiness...then he has got to go to!  lol  fine line between the defintion of a alcoholic and a social drinker...with the pills...did not feel i had a problem until they started affecting my life negatively...controlling me...if drinking or drugs are controlling me...i feel i am an addict

[bobby139]

I'm suppose to be asleep hehe but thought I'd put my two cents in....
I agree with worried, if it is interferring with your life in a bad manner of anykind its bad.
and will get worse, my husband drinks every day and is so proud of himself now if he drinks only a 12 pk but usually drinks itleast a 30 pk every eve.... So it will get worse try and get your hubby some help now...
bobby

[catmagnet]

I think he probably is an alcoholic because it does disrupt our life, but he doesn't drink every day

[catmagnet]

Well, he's not quite that bad now, but he was able to put down at least a 12 pack when he was younger. He stopped for a long time then started back up again for no apparent reason.

[catmagnet]

I know it's really late and the alcohol forum was completely quiet, so I thought I'd ask you guys your opinion.

[worried878]

alcohol is a drug as well...u were not out of place...we were talking in group...u have your weekend binge drinkers who dont drink all week...functioning alcoholics who drink alot everynight but dont get bad hangovers and make it to work and nver miss a day,,,then you have the ones who drink once in a blue moon but when they do all he11 breaks loose...then you have those who 2 drinks every night and even drink alone...??/subjective and depends on how it affects them and those around them i think

[Rose703]

My hubby has been a drinker since he was 17 years old!! Here's the thing with him though. He has about 6 beers per night, but is never mean, always gets things done around the house, and has never ever been late even one time to his job for any reason. I think it really all depends on the person and how they handle drinking. If his drinking is causing issues between the two of you then you should address it with him.

[GoingToMakeIt]

If he is getting banned from bars. He is not handling his liquor well. This is a sign that his drinking is more than social. I would reccomend a book, "Seven Weeks To Sobriety". Also go to their site which is health recovery dot com. It may give you some insight and help. As you are probably aware. His quitting has to come from him. But you can help him see that he has a problem.

[catmagnet]

Thanks for all the suggestions, guys. It's hard enough to deal with myself and have to deal with him also. He's gonnahave to make a choice- I've never given him an ultimatum, I don't think I'm going to do that yet, after all, he's been patient with me, too, but he does need some help.  cat

[GoingToMakeIt]

Good luck.

[reviewer]

Hi there. I was reading  your post... I lived with an alcoholic for years.. It was my first marriage.  I tried to do everything within my power to get him to stop.. I would throw the beer out, I would hide the money, ( I slept with my billfold under my pillow at night), I got seperate checking accounts ( he forged my name on the checks).  I gave ultimatums,, nothing helped.  I finally put him out of the house because I saw what his drinking was doing to our two daughters who were just little at the time..  That was the hardest thing I had to do beside telling my husband now that I have a drug problem..
He will have to do this on his own.. he has to admit he has a problem before anything else.  My ex. would drink beer all evening long, I never saw him drunk.. but it was still affecting his life and our families lives..
You can be supportive of him, but dont support  his drinking.. there is a difference.  
Hang in there, stay strong..