'OVER 30 DAYS, NEED SUPPORT

this is the first time i REALLY need you all this bad...Two of my kids have terrible colds..we go to the doctor and he gives them both the biggest bottles of Pancof, which i know what is in it...I am struggling....I need you all to help me right now..i have then in the cabinet but keep looking at them...This is crazy...I don't want to touch them , but i don't want them in my house.What kind of mom is this, they both need it..DANG..IT sucks.
i will not touch it , but why is it so hard???after over 30 days?
R2R

[hurtinunit]

OH don't go back.Your fooling yourself if you think you can just do it sometimes,you'll start the cycle over again.A friend at work today was telling me he has stock piled vicodin from knee replacement.He doesn't know I'm going through withdrawals.I won't ask him for some if you don't raid the kids stuff-DEAL?

[Inthedark&sad]

You seemed to have come so far.  Its the game our mind plays on us, it says oh just a little wouldn't hurt, remember.  But then remember the consequences and were it took you, tell yourself what ever you have to to stay away from it.  i.e. Its disgusting to take it from your children!

BTW, i have no clue what is in that medication, but in my two children, i found the best alternative to the docs who give out way to much medicine is wellness care.  Not all the bs prescreens for early detection, etc.  But for example... the chiroprator ( a good one)  Every signal sent to a nerve and imune system in your body travels through the spine.  If all the signals are operating correctly, the body has inate healing ability. I.e. God made us incredible.  Use this now after thirty days also, so your body will continue to detox and rid the poisons.  

The other note, "Raw" garlic is a bacteria killer.  If you can get your kids to have 1/2 teaspon twice a day, they will not get a bacteria sickness.  This cuts way down on colds.  I found if i added it to their mashed potatoes, garlic bread after its cooked. it went well. Now they believe its their medicine and will take a spoon right out of the jar for me.    This was also recomended by the chiro who believes the checmicals in medicines are toxic to the body.  Maybe you can preoccupy your cravings looking for better methods of staying healthy.  

[road2recovery]

DEAL....thanks for the post.....i don't want to go back.,,i have came so far,, but this is the first time it is my face..GOSH...BUT this is a deal or no deal??? what kind of money is on the board??
Just picking...There is no money worth me being clean
thanks again
r2r

[road2recovery]

omg---as a kid when i was sick my granny always gave me something with garlic in it..Your post makes so much sense..in pancof is liquid hydro'smy Doc..I will not lie here..i have taken my kids meds..What a sick addict i am or was..

But i just thought after over 30 days it would not bother me..S h it i was wrong..
BUT i will not
i am still fighing,,,thanks guys i need u all
r2r

[beachtowel]

Not sure are you married.......can he lock them up for you?

[alexandra fox]

You have done terrific to get to 30 days - in one way, that is a HUGE length of time to have not taken anything. On the other hand, from the perspective of breaking a many-year (I'm assuming here - many-month at any rate) habit, 30 days is just the beginning. Few reasons for the cravings:

BIOLOGICAL - I am studying science subjects at the moment, and what I am learning loud and clear is how the body likes to maintain homeostasis - blance - and how for months and months your balance was to have those drugs on board. The body remembers that, hence the cravings. Plus, neurons in the brain become downregulated after long term opiate use, and it takes quite a few weeks for the neurotransmitters to return to their righful amounts. Your receptors are simply wanting their neurotransmitters, and that feels like craving.

BEHAVIOURAL - Another perspective is plain old conditioning, for how many hundreds of days was popping a pill your daily action? Your system is conditioned to that, and it takes time for that to stop being the spontaneous urge. Its just the death throes of a very well ingrained habit.

Not to mention that your kiddies being unwell is probably stressful on you, and what have we done for so long under stress - take a durg!

What I am saying is that it is normal and expected to have cravings, and it is absolutely terrific that you are reaching out for help. God they can be so strong and overwhelming sometimes, so insistent, that the only way through is with the support of others. Hang in there, persevere, you are doing so well - I am such a wuss (australian word for coward, weakling LOL) when it comes to cravings, I admire your strength.

Alex

[NewLeaf]

My gut feeling tells me you can get through this. it is a test of your determination and decision to beat the addiction. Chances to pop a pill or use will always turn up and are always around the corner. It's what you do with it that counts and do you really want to have that conversation with yourself again about WHY, WHY did I do it AGAIN............if it were me, I would

Throw the cough syrup away or at least lock it up somewhere hard to get to and give the key to your oldest one, 22 right? You can always try some over the counter cough suppressant - as long as the coughs aren't that bad. How long have they had the cough, one week, two weeks or a few days? Tell the oldest  a little of what your struggle is or maybe about all of the struggle if you think she might understand. You never know, honesty has A LOT OF POWER, perhaps it will bring you a bit closer, believe me kids know when parents hide things and that can make relationships worse. Honesty generally brings about better relationships over time.Your call, easy for me to say and hard for you to do, but you have made it this far and you can keep on going, you love yourself and your family too much to be tempted now.... GIANT {{{{hugs}}}}  keep on posting if you have to

[johnnykelly]

I can identify, Its like a magnet, Liquid Gold. I am on my 4th day of detox from oxy.Last night my head felt like i had a brain tumor, Im glad I didnt have that product available.You stated you have 30days clean, CONGRATULATIONS !!!  PLEASE BE CAREFUL johnnykelly- cheers

[justlikeyou]

pancof restores health to your children,

and denies you any.

be strong and as soon as their better, flush it.

[road2recovery]

thanks, you guys, i have not touched it...I only gave my little one half of the dosage..Because to be honest here, i know what it is because i took it, when it was percribed to them..So i don't remember how the little one reacted to it yrs before i was an addict..I know she was little , but i was scared it would knock her out...so she did fine, and at least slept ..The oldest took her full dose, but still coughed all nite...I think she has bronchitis...
BUT here i am still clean...know what i am going ot pat myself on my own shoulder!!! LOL
As i am very proud of myself..I never had that feeling before..I mean i was proud but i didn't have it in my house....

NEW leaf--the oldest has been coughing for over a week..The little one a few days..But it is a very dry cough, that is constantly...And old time remedies you can give me??
I really don't want to give the kid much of that stuff...

or anyone with remedies i would love to hear about!!!
thanks guys....
love to all of u
R2R

[avisg]

Can you leave giving it to hubby . lock it up if you have to .  DO NOT TOUCH!!!!!!!! Hun , PLZ PLZ dont use it . I know what you are going thru I will send you a post in your med help mail girl.
Avis

[avisg]

ok I cant do your med help mail it will be in you other mail :)

[HigherPowered]

What helps me to get through times like hese is to remeber that these meds were given to someone else and to not think of them as narcotics but just as plain meds and that these people are sick and they need their medsYour kids don't know the diff. between narcotics or just plain meds the doc gave them. What will they think of their Mommy who takes their meds? What will they tell their  friends?

[wantlifeback]

I am so proud of you coming here for help, that was a great decision.  You are making the right choice to not be temped with this new hurtle, 30 days in and i know you will do the right thing.  You have helped me personally in so many ways and i want the best for you.  I look forward to being able to tell you my day 30..your support will be a big part of that day when it arrives. .Keep up the great fight...YOU CAN DO IT!!!  

[NewLeaf]

Glad you did take the "bait" and today I know you feel stronger for it.

When my girls were little and had coughs, a nice warm cup of chamomile & mint tea with lots of honey usually helped calm down the cough.Honey has some natural antibiotic properties as well as helping surpress a cough. Those Ricola lemon honey drops to suck on help too.  When I was taking care of my oldest grandaughter last winter she came to me with a persistent cough that wouldn't go away forever it seemed (her teacher even called me and asked me not to send her to school - it wasn't contaigous at that point either). So, I had her drinking "special" tea, gave her the drops for her pocket on recess, and bulked up her vitamin intake with Trader Joe's Dynamo Juice which has tons of extra vitamins she wasn't getting when with her mom.  
Was it you that sent me vial e-mail all the pics of your kids & doggie? When they came in so fast after I put my email on here I got spooked - chalk it down to computer age paranoia - Yesterday, I was cleaning out emails and actualy took a closer look at them and noticed they had your road2recovery name on them. I took the risk and opened the attachments..... beautiful family! All of you...  

[road2recovery]

thanks, isn't my puppy the cutest thing?? i adore him!!!  I am headed to the store and will get what you just spoke about...i think anything is better then the poison in that stuff..
Then i thought should i just pour it out in the drain?? BUT am i doing this for me or for them??
help me out her as a mother..My oldest was in a bad relationship that he was doing lortabs, even got her to do a few..SO she knows the feeling you get..Thank god she is out of that relationship...BUT she is a smart girl and i trust her,BUT scared she takes too much of it...But again am i doing this for me or them??
Thanks again
R2R
33 Days Clean.!

[NewLeaf]

So those emails were from you - my computer world paranoia was unfounded. Whew. Your doggie is cute.     : o}

You are doing it for you. Children tend to emulate their parents so if you are honest with your daughter about what you are going through and you stay clean, it is the best life example you can give her and all of them. So, while you are doing it for you, ultimately it is for them too.

On the cough thing, sometimes it was tea several times a day at first.

Have you ever talked to your kids about prescription drug addiction/dangers? I know as parents we tend to generally talk about the illegal drugs and not mention the other "legal" stuff. Perhaps if she knew how easy it is to become addicted to even the prescription opiates and that many, normal, everyday people get addicted unknowingly then end up on the methadone, suboxone road............. you get my drift.  Important question here is, does your husband or anyone else in your family know you have been walking down this road?   You can e-mail me if you want. NL



.  

[NewLeaf]

Hey my first post today should have read

Glad you DID'NT  take the "bait" and today I know you feel stronger for it.

[road2recovery]

yes, i knew that lol check your inbox

[NewLeaf]

Checked it.