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One day relapse

Hi everyone. I didn't relapse, but I started thinking about what would happen if I did. Basically, I'm 12 days clean from oxy and I thought to myself what would happen if I took like 50 mg just one day. Keep in mind I used to do 100-150 mg a day. And I know, as you all know, the true answer to that question. But here is what I'm looking for an answer to : let's say you had a crystal ball and it told you that one days lighter use would not cause you to go full out again. Like as if you had a magical pass to do it once and never again. Not true o know, but please stay with me here - just pretend that were the case. If you went 12 days clean, and then did half of what you used to do, for just that one day, with no repercussions and no further use, would doing it that one day cause you to go through WD again? Would it cause you to have anxiety attacks? What would that one day do to you or would it have no negative post use affect? And I know this is a tough subject and I'm not secretively looking for permission. In reality it's the opposite. I had an opportunity to use today and chose not to. A chance encounter with an old friend could have allowed me to make that error in judgement today, but I was strong and declined and felt great about doing so. So instead of actually doing it to test the boundary, I decided to post this question here, and fulfill my curiosity this way. Trust me when I tell you that I am in a great place right now, have no desire to use, and I'm proud of myself for feeling this way. I'm really just curious and thought it would be safer to throw the question out here - not a popular question I know - rather than use myself as an experimental lab rat to get the answer.  So again, all things being equal, all cosmic intervention, all spiritual guidance, all karma in check, if you used half of what you did, for one day, after being clean for 12, and you were guaranteed to never do it again, what effect, if any, would that one day have on you.

Please don't yell at me for asking. I'm just sitting here, feeling like Captain Pholosophy right now, knowing that if you're not growing you're dying, and somewhat bored I guess. Thanks for listening.
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Avatar universal
If we were able to take drugs for one day, without the consequences of a relapse, we wouldn't be addicts! Then the question becomes "would you want to be a normie for a day and take drugs?" And my answer would still be no, because normies don't get that same rush that we get, so what's the point of putting that crap in my body? Anyways, as an addict I know that I can't even go there, because it takes me to dark places.
Helpful - 0
1742220 tn?1331356727
wind, very recently I had six mos clean and I did about 25 vics because I had access to them and then a few weeks later I did 10 vics and both times it fooked me up immeasurably.  not so much physically although I would say there were some repercussions but so much mentally oh I mean SO much mentally like SO so so so so much ... ugh what a super bad choice that was.  does that help? --meegan
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4522800 tn?1470325834
Hi..Ya that is why they say 1 is to many and a 10000000 is never enough..It will start the Pleasure part of the brain back up..It will play it again "Sam" Oh just one more for this reason or that..Like I say if we are going to walk on the coals we will get burned.I might be walking in 9 months from my drugs and over 8 years from booze..But guess what I can not even have a beer on the Beach..I have experienced how this will just start right back up..Like they say once a addict always a addict..But maybe some one out there can have control..Ha!! If they can my Hats off to them..You did good by not giving in..keep it up and try to stay away from so called friends that use..it only causes Triggers and that one I do know 100%.
Bless
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
lab rat here!   I've done your experiment many times.  It doesn't have an opening!  I spent almost 40 yrs lookin for it and there ain't one, the answer is always the same and i have been a very cleaver rat,   Jails, institutions, or DEATH!  AND I know many who have died and several who are in prision, worst yet are us who left our parents, spouses, kids, brothers, and sisters for these frickin pain relievers.  

Sorry mh mods!  I'm in a regretful mood tonight. I'll be good tomorrow. 5/26/13.  
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Avatar universal
Thanks - I was very proud of myself for not using. And I swear I'm not looking for an answer that will tell me its okay. Hard to believe I know. I'm really just curious. When you strip away everything we know about using "just once" and move it all over to fantasyland, would there be a negative effect? Who knows I guess. It's really not something I'm willing to actually seek the answer to by doing it. Honestly just curious. And I meant what I said - I'm bored right now. I don't feel like sleeping. Not tired. Just found myself thinking that's all.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Well look at it like this . If you did it once you might do it again . Im almost 8 weeks clean from 180mg a day and I wouldn't take a half a pill at this point . You were strong today by not doing it just be that strong everyday . I'm in loads of pain right now ans still WILL NOT take one . It's bad stuff !! I'm very happy for you for being strong in not using !!!!!!! Keep up the good work . I think the whole can I do it just one time is your brain and the devil pills talking to you lol ... Please don't don't it !!   ;)
Helpful - 0
5347058 tn?1381188426
Good job on passing up on using. That is a very hard thing to do. In answer to your question, I believe taking a relatively small amount of your DOC would set you way back mentally. The physical wouldn't be that bad probably. But we all know that it is next to impossible to just take one, or do it once. That's why we are all  here. Take care of yourself.
Helpful - 0
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