Opiate Withdrawal

I take 20, 10/500 mg Lortabs, per day..I am not bragging...at all. Over 40 years old.
Tried to quit for many years, but have not had much luck getting past 12 hours of stopping. Taking 2-3 pills at a time. I do not have the money to go to a medical detox. Don't know what to do. My wife is addicted too. Both of our addictions resulted from injuries.  Can't seem to get past any withdrawal symptoms, not to mention the loss of energy-mood, only without for 12 hours once I try. Arms feel like Restless Leg Syndrome, or what I perceive it to feel like. I exist in a beautiful place, and very greatful for that, but we have spend so much money supporting our habit. I feel like if I quit, we'll end up with a divorce, but worth it to stop the compulsiveness. Tried to wein down with DRs help, but who am I kidding, I cannot take one of anything, like a "Lays" Potato Chip. Takes 2.5 pills just to get normal enough to go to work. Liver hurts constantly, Gone from 230lbs to 172lbs over the last few years. Bawling my eyes out whilst typing this but only from emotional pain.
If you know... then share with me the answer.
KBCO.

[hydro___fool]

Hang in there KBCO.  You are taking the first steps as well as letting out the emotional pain (crying).  It's okay as we have all gone through it.  The important thing is that you are here seeking support.  It has taken your life away from you and now you want it back.  So take it back!  Fight through the pain and through the pain and the results will be fantastic!   And of course....remove all sources of the medication so you cant return.   Stay strong and soon you will be posting 10 days clean...30.....60 etc.   One day at a time for now though.  

[kyle505]

Welcome. First, it's great that you are considering getting clean, but it will be a very difficult, if not impossible task if your wife is not willing to stop. Plus, it sounds like you have a readily available source, and that in and of itself is something that will derail you even before you start (as you've already learned).
I want to be supportive, but I also try to be very honest when I post on someone else's thread...If you don't stop you could very easily lose everything, including your health (the signs are already there). Ultimately, it is your decision - you are the one who puts the pills in your mouth, no one else.
Detox is hard, but staying clean is harder, and you have two huge obstacles to deal with before you can even begin the process.
Keep posting...We're here to help.

[Pat1956100]

So many people have come to this forum thinking that they were different and that there was no way they could quit.  So many of them were proven wrong and not only quit but they are racking up the clean days.
With the support of this forum you can do it.  Let us know when you are ready and everyone here will help you as much as possible.
Read as many posts as you can from other people who were so hopeless and afraid when they first came here.
If you want it, you can do it.
Keep posting.

[Pat1956100]

Has your wife talked about quitting?  If she sees you getting clean she just may want it too. Especially when she sees how well you will be doing.

[KBCO]

You mean it is not going to be really easy...imagine that. Anything that is worthwhile requires hard work. I appreciate your honesty. I have taken all the pills and cut them in half, to go through the ritual of taking them but cutting back. I quit tramadol this way after 7 years of equal dosage. I will also next week cut them in quarters or half again to try to ease the withdrawal. I tried cold turkey, but felt like I was getting ready to seize up. Any other suggestions. I have no problem with divorce if we no longer share the same "activities" I am an outdoorsy mountain man, she like tv. I have my 3 dogs to keep me busy.  I will give her the opportunity to quit too, but if she has pills around the house, it will be impossible for me to abstain.

[KBCO]

Feeling no joy, or depression, will be the hardest to get through. When does this part pass, how long till I feel better?

[jibi07]

Hi KBCO, i am on day 7 clean from percocet, the first 6 days were hell, crying, pain, cant sleep, all those wonderful WD feelings , emotions etc.... I had some doubts, but then i thought about all the crappy stuff the pills did to me, and i didnt want to feel like that any more.... they say that WD is different for everyone, but for me, today day 7 has so far been a great day, i cried this morning, but only because i was happy, and i felt good, i was able to walk a little further today, i smiled more, and people were noticing just today the already big difference from yesterday.................. so everyday does get easier, i am taking one day at a time, and filling in every minute of that day with something to keep me occupied until the next day, but if your wife is not ready to make this change with you, then maybe it's best you go somewhere while you detox, is there a family member you can go stay with ? Or is your Mrs ready to quit too? Might be easier to do it together.... in any event, in the few days i have been posting, there is TONS of support here, people care.... you can do this!! Good Luck