Opinions on NA meetings

[Marce4]

I went to one NA meeting last year when I did my first detox...don't know if I had a closed mind or just not ready to admit my addiction but I was very uncomfortable there.  I found the same one in my area tonight and thinking I better go...went to an old website to buy vicodin...got off REAL fast...cravings seem stronger today! I know some of you do attend these meetings...what do you think??

[Marce4]

Doh!!!!!...I just reread your previous post...sounds like you recommend a meeting...it is very scary being a newcomer. Easy to speak on here, different when you are face to face with people....much more vulnerable! I am also afraid of seeing people I know..live in a very small community with very big gossip line!!!!!! (And I don't mean people in the meeting but people I know on the street!)

[beachtowel]

Hi Marce, your probably going to think that I am really nuts but I drive one hour, 60 miles to my N/A meetings. I live North of Detroit and drive to Bowling Green Ohio for a Wed. nite N/A meeting. The only reason is the group of people who attend the meeting and the Mediators that run it including myself from time to time. They also bring in guest Mediators from the Bowling Green, Perryburg, Toledo area. I feel that my sobriety is worth the trip.
I have been to around 40-50 meetings that I was very uncomfortable with or just didn't like the meetings.

[Marce4]

Not to be thick but you tried 40-50 different meetings and finally found one that you feel comfortable with?

[CATUF]

I go almost exclusively to AA meetings, even though I consider my main problem to be drug addiction. I have found NA to be too frequently a bit to trendy or something - almost like it was supposed to be this "cool" group, where being cool is the focus and Recovery was almost an after thought.  

I have been to some N.A. meetings where that is not at all the case.  In fact, I still miss the Tuesday Night NA meeting at John Mann in Winchester, VA, but I'm too far away (6 hrs) to hit that one any more.  That was a GOOD NA meeting - no cool click BS, just a lot of drug addicts serious about Recovery.  I have to admit, however, that my problem with local NA is that the average age seems to be less than 1/2 my age - I hate feeling like an old man.

EVERYONE is scared when they first start going to meetings.  It's a scary thing to do.  But an essential part of Recovery is being willing to be honest and let yourself be vulnerable.  I will say this, meetings don't really start to work their real magic until you go enough so that you feel like part of the group.  They can still be very helpful - you begin to see that you're not nearly as alone or unique as you feared and you hear a lot of good stuff.  However, until it's "your group" you're still just sitting in a room full of similarly afflicted strangers.

So, going to this-meeting and then that-meeting and then some-other-meeting is not the best way to go.  Go to enough meetings so that you can see what each is like (each meeting has its own personality) and go more than a few times to each.  The next step is to pick a "Home Group," which is just an informal designation meaning that you really want to be a part of that group (you don't have to apply or be accepted, etc.).  My Home Group meets 1 night a week and I never miss it, but there are 5 other meetings during the week that I go to regurally as well.

You should know that the regulars at any meeting really do welcome newcomers.  When they say "the newcomer is the most important person at any meeting," they really mean it.  Just be open, honest and willing.  

[Dpilot]

I go to AA mostly but attend NA about once a month. I'm with RLB, I find the people there easier to get along with, but if you can find a NA meeting that fits you that's great. I actually attend meetings at about 3 different AA groups. I go to a different one depending on what mood I'm in, that's how variable and different the meetings can be. I quit drinking a long time ago but and it doesn't bother me. Some of the people in the NA meetings drink and they're OK with that but I can't. I know if I drink I will drug too. I won't necesarily drug if I drink. Wierd? I would look at different meetings in different places, and look at different types of meetings. Notice how I said I? I can't tell you what to do. I can only tell you what I would do and what worked for me. Thats what good people at good meetings should do is just tell you what they would do, or did. If they start bossing me around and telling me what to do I would find another meeting. The exception to that is your sponser when you get one. I would wait a while till I got one, so I could know the people a little bit first before I picked one. Good Luck, meetings don't work for everyone but they do for me.

[Dpilot]

Almost forgot, how much time and trouble do you go through to get and use your drugs? "don't have to awnser that out loud, just to yoursef". Isn't it worth spending that much time and effort, maybe even a little more, to stay sober?

[relapse07]

Ya about doing more to stay sober. But my problem is deep down I want to be high pretty much as bad as I want to be sober. So therefore, I put very little effort to stay sober and better myself. My g/f tries to get me to go do stuff all the time but all i feel i want to do is just sit around and sulk at most play guitar.I just recently starting putting effort into drinking lots of water and eating right.I guess it's just really hard for me to give a damn about anything. I love my girl to death but sometimes dont even care if she is around.It sux. Hope you guys arent like that too and sorry if you are.
Jeff

[Marce4]

Thanks for the responses...I think I'm going to try and find an AA meeting.  Like CATUF said...I felt in the minority in that I was older (44) than most of the group...many were teens/20's and seemed very open. I just felt out of place. There were a few older men who were on drugs entire lives...stories were inspiring but I felt like I was a big wuss after hearing their stories...Oh a few pills...how bad could that be...well look where it's gotten me now!  I will never again look at degrees of addiction, they are all one in the same and are hell for each person going through this! Thanks again all!

[beachtowel]

Hi Marce,

Your 44 your very young I just turned 51. I still feel about 32 but when I look in the mirror and see all the gray I remember..lol
To your (thickness)...yes over a 6 month period I estimated about 40 different meeting places.
I ended up going to the first place i ever went to in Bowling Green 60 miles away.