Overdoses

[Prospero73]

You don't see much about OD's on this forum.  Maybe because if you have extensive experience with them, you haven't lived to tell the tale.

Some thoughts from my morning run on types of fatal OD's :

1. Intentional (aka suicide)

2. Accidental (mistook 500 mg pill for 50 mg)

3. Unintentional:  

     a. Emotional:  too distraught to be careful

     b.  Hubris: I got away with it before, and I can get away with it again

[theeagle]

I probably have more experience than you can comprehend. Once I woke on a stainless table in an ER - they were intubating me so a machine could breathe for me -- a for sure out of body near death experience. None of my OD's were intentional - all were mistakes.  And they were huge mistakes!!

[gizzy32]

Eagle and I were talking about overdoses yesterday. I had 3 for sure, maybe more, but the last one was almost fatal and what made getting clean a lot easier. Not one was intentional, although at that point in my life I didnt' care if I lived or died, that was until I was on death's door and realized that's not what I really wanted. I have heard sometimes people have minor overdoses without knowing it?

[Prospero73]

These responses suggest that probably the vast majority of OD's are unintentional, i.e., mistakes.  Whether they are fatal or not depends for the most part on whether there is anyone around to bring you out of it.  In my son's case, the first three were mistakes, someone was there (at home), 911 was called, and he came out OK.  All I know about the fourth (and final) one is that he was away from home, and was taken, too late,  to a hospital by an acquaintance (source) who probably didn't want to deal with 911 people.

[tomskat]

I have had several OD experiences also.Like gizz, none were intentional..just stupididity on my part.They all sucked and am amazed i survived them!!

[10356]

I also have.. the last one I'm still not sure if it was intentional or just took the high to far.. but loosing my very thoughts the ability to write or even recognize the home I have lived in for 24 years was the most frighting thing I have ever experienced.. I could not sign my name or do simple math. that was 2 weeks my family was the most frightened and for this I feel most shameful but for this experience I finally received long over due counseling that has helped me to want to live 100% in the now.. lesa

[outotown]

all me i did it on purpose

[mom_of_two136]

I also did it on purpose. Luckly, I lived and I finally got the professional help I needed.

[lonewolf07]

I've tried to use OTC drugs to commit suicide.  Not proud of it - no way - but I did it and I'm sure there were other times when I'd take "just a few more".  When I had a heart attack recently, I promised the Almighty that I'd never try suicide again.  I don't want to die.  Presently, I'm in a rehab program for weaning or tapering off Xanax and it's SO difficult but I know I need help to deal with this.

[Prospero73]

All your comments are helpful to me, as I have an issue with overdoses.  Forty-six years ago, my father died of an overdose, combining sub-lethal doses of alcohol and barbiturates.  He was 50 years old, and alone in the house.  The insurance company demanded an inquest to see if it was suicide, and the ruling was that there was no proof it was intentional, so they had to pay (not much).  But I wondered for 45 years if he could have set it up to look like an accident, so as to leave some insurance for his family.

Last September, my son, aged 26, ODed on methadone.  He was in the middle of eating dinner, sitting in the living room watching Mad Men, five feet away from me.  When I noticed that he was lying back with his mouth open, I made efforts to rouse him, but he was out cold and not breathing.  I called 911 and, coached by the operator, did CPR until the fire dept. and paramedics showed up.  They brought him out with Narcan and other methods, and took him to the hospital.

He lived through that one, and two more, before his luck ran out April 21.  I did, however, get some sort of closure on my father's death, because I saw how fast you go under from respiratory failure.  You don't have time to call for help or do anything, and if you're alone, you're dead.

Everybody, please be careful.  When you go out this way, you have no idea what sort of hell you create for the people left behind.

[10356]

I'am so sorry to read of the tragic loss of your son.. my heart goes out to you and all that loved him.. lesa

[candothis247]

i'm so sorry for your loss. thank you for taking the time to share. vey sad and tragic.

[Prospero73]

I should have made more clear in my last post that I believe all my son's overdoses were unintentional.  He had some pretty realistic plans for what he was going to do after his recovery, but he had a tendency to underestimate his loss of tolerance during the drug-free periods, so when he relapsed he was at more risk than he realized.  When I read Baron Munchausen's account of his lengthy taper from a methadone maintenance program, I realized how much time and patience needs to be employed in getting off methadone, and my son, although he was pretty knowledgeable about drugs, was in too much of a hurry about recovery.

[melissa845]

Im sorry to hear of your sons loss.
I overdosed last year on my 18th birthday.
I was at this massive party with all my friends had way to much to drink then started on the drugs, there was a group of five of us that went upstairs and did alot more drugs, I watched one of my friends pass out cold on the floor in front of me. I couldn't do anything because a few minutes i too passed out.
If it wasn't for someone looking for us i wouldn't be hear today. I still dont no if i did it on purpose but i have been fighting an addiction for over 4 years i just took it too far that night.
I woke up in a hospital a few weeks later and was informed that one of the girls had died. I tried rehab after that but that didn't help. Ive quit and taken it back up so many times. But today i am proud to say that i have made it to 7 days clean and im hoping that i have the will not to give in again.

[gizzy32]

I am sorry about your loss. I just wanted you to know that reading this yesterday helped me. I had a rare craving and this story brought back memories of my overdose and gave me strength that I needed.  Ty for sharing this with us, I know it helped others too.

[10356]

Melissa congrats on your 7 days.. it took me 41 years and some real crappy stuff happened in those years.. You have your whole life open to you.. I have been clean 3 days shy of 7mo. if I would have done this in youth Gosh who knows what I could have done with my life.. I know clean you will do something with yours !! I'm happy and proud of you.. Addiction as you have found out is a life and death struggle.. I'm so very happy you choose life.. lesa

[kim715]

Prospero,I am so very sorry for your loss.My prayers are with you..

[dominosarah]

I too am very sorry about your loss......May you find comfort in knowing you are helping others with your story.........sara

[10356]

bump

[lonewolf07]

I wonder if MH would add an overdose forum?  There is a suicide forum but isn't used much.  The more I think about it, the more important I think the issue of overdosing is.  Just a thought.

[laceylucy3]

As an ICU nurse I have taken care of many overdoses. I have found intentional and unintentional usually differ by what was taken. If it is an OD on oxy,lortab, xanax, heroin they are almost always just trying to get really high. If the OD is on asprin, tylenol or heart medications about 50% want to die  and the other 50% are begging for someone to pay attention to their pain.