Oxycontin addiction... Feeling hopeless

[TecK415]

It all started about two years ago, just a 40mg pill once or twice a week. After a couple months it became a daily habit, and here I am. I was up to about 100-120mgs a day. This is hard to write... I never thought I would need a drug just to get through the day. I work and take a few classes so I don't really have the time to quit cold turkey,(the thought of that also scares the hell out of me). I've been trying to taper down for the past few months, but when ever I have gotten close to the end I have caved in to the addiction. I was up to about 100mgs a day again, and just a couple days ago I went straight down to 20. I'm clammy, aches every where, and my emotions are uncontrollable. I have work tomorrow but I really have no idea how I could do it without gong up with the dose again. ugh... So I was wondering about suboxone, I've heard about it, but not from anyone who has actually used it. I don't even know where to get it! No one else knows about my oxycontin use, so I was glad to find this site. Can someone tell me what they think about soboxone?  

[TecK415]

For the mental part do you mean the cravings? All I know is that it's  taking all the strength I have to stop my self from going to get some pills right this second. I don't get it, it just makes me depressed when I take them, all I can think about is how much of an idiot I am for doing it. It doesn't even make me happy, yet I feel that I need it so bad...

[worried878]

Suboxone taken for a short time can help with the physical withdrawal...but the mental part has been the hardest part for me and that part lingers for a while...if u take suboxone for a long period, it is addictive and u would be facing withdrawal from the sub..it is a stong opiate and not to be taken without fully understanding it and considering all options

[TecK415]

Thank you for the quick replies. Yes sunnyOne, that is what I'm afraid of. Taking suboxone to quit, just to become addicted to that as well.

[worried878]

If u go to the health pages at the right under DISCUSSION you will see some articles on buprenorphine/sub...I tapered and quit so dd not take it..i tried to taper alone and was unable to do so successfully and had to hand my pills over to a friend to dole out to me each day and then i quit...i was working as well...tapering slowly is easier than dropping so much in one day like you did but it is still a bit uncomfortable...someone on sub will post soon and help u...people who are on high doses who can not quit by theirself or who have relapsed often usually are the ones who choose it.   good luck and keep posting...there is alot of support here