Oxycontine C/T day set

[Oxywannabeclean]

I decided to go C/T on June 13, picked the date and getting ready for the pain. My problem, I'm using more Oxy and now heroin. I tried to taper but the pain and anxiety was severe and the Oxy wasn't working like usual so I started with heroin again. Now I'm back tapering off the heroin again. Seems I do not have enough will power to taper, is this common to use more knowing I'm going to quit in 2 weeks? Any support would be great... I'm really afraid of quitting...scares the living *....* out of me. I'm up to 120mg of Oxy or alternatively taking 4 flaps (2pts) of heroin each day.

[Mikeinthesouth]

I try and try to look at where this **** leads us I look at people who have used more years than I have and see where it has taken them and I see some pretty usded up people out there still trying to use succesfully as if there were a such thing. Huh? Well it is like it won't get through sometimes yes logically it does and I understand itas I have not always beaten the odds in my life or I would be 100% able bodied which I am nolonger under that classification so I know the truth here there is a box with my name on it just waiting for me to leave this earth over this addiciton but to get that to sink in and make myself take it seriously sink in and take it and not be so self destructive and care a lil bout living one or the other has got be it I don't know why it is no big deal with me sometimes. Screws loose maybe who knows. Anyway I'll make my point we gotta look at where the **** this **** brings us where we came from where we are at and how much farther wer are willing to be in consideration to all ie financial, material, emotional relationship wise ( This is number one ) and physically. I am lucky still have all my teeth two cars on my face that the world can see that is and not much really else physical damage that I know of yet/ So in reality it is I think in actually seeing it for what it is and not what it can do for the short haul. I just keep thinking of how far down do I want to be which is so far not anymore.. Mike

[joann1975]

Best of luck to you! You have mad a great decision don't be scared you can do this... just make a plan and stick to the plan! -- JoAnn

[ILoveLukey]

I know where you are coming from. When I got my appointment with my addiction psychologist, I kindof went wild. I knew that this was it and that I was going to go on Suboxone and no more pain pills, so I did take more.......just as a "going away party".  I never had enough willpower to taper. That is why I went on the Subs. Quitting doesn't have to be scarey if you do all of your research, decide what is best for you and then stay with the plan.  It can be scarey but I am sure there is a good option out there for you that will work. Whatever you choose to do will take disapline (sp?) You really gotta wanna.  My best wishes and good luck to you.