Positive

Today is day 3!  I am staying positive.  I did 1/2 hour exercise video yesterday!  That made me feel great.  I am embracing the way I am feeling, because, it simply is what it is!  My body is not agreeing with my head, but I am forcing my head to agree with my body and it makes it so much easier.  JUST DON'T FIGHT IT!  FEEL IT AND KNOW IT WILL GET BETTER.  THIS IS ALMOST THE ONLY WAY OUT!  THE OTHER WAY IS DEATH!  IT'S OUR CHOICE!  LET'S KICK IT'S UGLY *** AND GET ON WITH OUR LIVE AS CLEAN PEOPLE THAT HAVE FEELINGS THAT ARE F'D UP LIKE EVERYONE ELSE IN THE WORLD.  IT IS OK TO FEEL!  

I WISH THE BEST TO EVERYONE!  DON'T LET THIS **** GET YOU!  I AM NOT!

[gnarly_1]

KEEP ON pushing forward your attitude ROCKS and thats everything when your doing this you will succeed just be ready to dig deep when all is not so rosy but I just wanted to tell you you are doing great it all what you make of it everyday we get up look in the mirror and make a decision on what kind of day we willl have those that are successful look beyond there circumstances keep up the good work and you will be out of this mess b/4 you know it good luck and God bless......Gnarly    

[comfortquinn]

That you for your wonderful words.  I am feeling kinda crappy and it's cool!  I like what you said about, "I will be out of this mess b/4 I know it!"  So true!  Just had to prepare myself for this and just be positive!

[Innerstrength67]

Congratulations on day 3. Wow, you are doing awesome. I have 27 hours and your inner strength is giving me hope. It's such a deep personal decision to walk away from a pill obsessed life. But knowing there are people out there like you, I have hope!!! Thank you for posting.

[comfortquinn]

Today is day 4!  I am not gonna lie, it was a bit hard last night!  I got through it!  Now, I GET to get through today and stay POSITIVE at the same time.  I read that after 3 days of not taking any Suboxone, that is when it gets bad, but the worst usually last a week at the most.  Then you gradually get better!  I just believe in embracing how I feel!  I may have lost my job over this, but I feel that my life is more important right now.  I was so worried last night about telling my boss the truth!  I told her today and she said she would get back to me.  What ever happens life goes on!  I am blessed to have a great family that will help me to get by until I get this under control.  IF SOMEONE OUT THERE IS AFRAID OF LOSING A JOB OR SOMETHING OR SOMEONE, YOU HAVE TO PUT YOURSELF 1ST!  LOVE YOURSELF!  
ALL I KNOW IS I AM DONE.  I DID PAIN PILLS FOR 15 YEARS AND THE LAST 5 MONTHS OF SUBOXONE.  I AM DONE!  

I AM DOING THIS ONE DAY AT AT TIME.  ONE MINUTE AT A TIME.  I LEARNED TO HOW TO BE IN THE MOMENT AT THIS WONDERFUL REHAB I WENT TO, BUT SOMETIMES IT IS HARD WHEN YOU ARE FEELING SO CRAPPY.  YOU THINK "IS THIS EVER GONNA END?"  IT IS GOING TO END.  IT'S ALL OK!!!!!!  
TRY TO JUST BE IN THE MOMENT, DON'T FOCUS ON THE FUTURE UNLESS YOU HAVE TO.  I FIXED MY FUTURE PROBLEM, OF MAYBE LOSING MY JOB, BY TAKING CARE OF IT, BY TALKING TO MY BOSS.  

THINGS ARE GOING TO WORK OUT.  BEING IN THE MOMENT AND FEELING IT AND OWNING IT IS WHAT IT IS ABOUT!  IT ISN'T GOING AWAY!  SO FIGHT IT AND BE HAPPY WHILE YOUR DOING IT!  IT'S WORTH IT!  

SERIOUSLY, ONE DAY AT A TIME!  DO EXERCISE!  PUSH YOURSELF TO DO THINGS YOU DON'T REALLY FEEL LIKE DOING!  YOUR GONNA HAVE TO DO THEM EVENTUALLY.  EXERCISE BUILDS YOUR METABOLISM, SO THAT WAY IT WILL GET OUT OF YOUR SYSTEM FAST AND YOU CAN GET ON WITH YOUR LIFE.  EXERCISE IS ALSO GOOD FOR DEPRESSION, ANXIETY AND YOU WILL SLEEP BETTER TOO!  SO, NO MATTER WHAT YOU ARE FEELING LIKE.  PUSH YOURSELF, YOU WILL BE GLAD YOU DID!  I AM SO POSITIVE AND YOU CAN BE TO, IF YOU "CHOOSE" TO!

[spanky595]

     Good work, stay with recovery and your life will get better.

[gnarly_1]

GOT to say your attitude ROCKS and this is all about attitude it makes the difference between discomfort and suffering also really helps your recovery those that have a good attitude and dont complaine heal faster and get well quicker so you off to a great start hang in there now the next step get yourself to a meeting feed the mental side of this thing aftercare is not optional it is a critical part of recovey so plug in some where become pro/active in your recovery you can do this good luck and God bless.....Gnarly

[Jimmy1975]

Hello and welcome ! Congratulations on your decision to take your life back ! Fifteen years is a long time and I commend you on your courage ! If I may ask how much were you taking before you started your taper ? It will be really nice to follow your journey and I hope you stay with us ! All the best to you , Jimmy

[comfortquinn]

I was taking 2- 4 milligrams a day for 5 months, then cut down to 1mg for about 5 days.  I know that's not very long.  

I just found out I am not going to lose my job!  It's not the greatest job, but I need it and I thank God that they are understanding of what I am going through.  If they weren't, I WOULD STILL STAY POSITIVE!  

I believe in the end, if you just do what is right, things will go right for you!  I see it all the time!

[comfortquinn]

You are so right about the aftercare thing.  I used to go to so many meetings high, thinking I was gonna get better, eventually.  Like some kind of miracle was gonna happen.  I CAN DEFINATELY, SEE THAT I AM GONNA NEED THEM NOW AND I WILL TAKE IT ONE DAY AT A TIME!!!!
I am looking back and seeing that the suboxone that I was taking did help.  I felt calm, but not foggy headed and that help me to focus on the GOOD in life and all it has to offer.  When I tried to just detox off of pain pills, I was so foggy headed and got so discouraged and would always run back to them.  I GAINED A POSITIVE ATTITUDE WHILE TAKING SUBOXONE.  I AM GOING TO KEEP IT, NOW THAT I HAVE IT!  

EITHER WAY, WE HAVE TO STOP OR WE WILL DIE OR END UP BEHIND BARS.  LOONEY BIN!  ETC!

Thank you everyone for the encouragement!  I hope you all stay positive!  WHY NOT?  WE CAUSE SUFFERING BY LETTING **** GET TO US!!!  LETS MAKE THE "DECISION" TO NOT LET US SUFFER MORE THAN WE HAVE TO!!!  GOD BLESS!