Hi. I've been with my boyfriend for a while now and shortly after we started dating, I realized he was drinking heavily again. I knew when we met he had been through 12 steps and had been sober for almost a year. Then he started drinking and for 3 years he was constantly with it in his system, lost three jobs, ended up living with his mom, then on the streets, in the halfway house, and back with his mom after a failed attempt back in society. and racked up a $50,000 medical debt from being in and out of the emergency room. Supposively now he has been sober since february, has a steady job, and we are living together. I'm just wondering if we did this all too soon. Last month he got a cold, so I went to the store and got him some nyquil (stupid me). Since that week, I don't know how much he has taken, I just know he's taken it every night. I also found a bottle of wine stashed in the closet. He carries a lot of shame with drinking and it's drove him to lie about any form of it. When confronting him about it, he tells me not to worry. He says he just had a glass of wine, and takes the nyquil to sleep. I know his true problem is with hard liquor, when he has a sip of that, he cant control himself, but I'm worried that wine and nyquil will drive him to stronger stuff. Also I believe there are many underlying psychological reasons that he needs to take care of.
My real worry is that our life will spiral out of control again. I cant go on living everyday with the burden of constantly wondering if my boyfriend is going to be alive when I get home. He says I expect the worst because I've only seen the worst. I also worry that the acetaminophen in nyquil mixed with alcohol will do unforseen damage to his already messed up liver. I don't know how to confront him. I cant proove that I know what he's doing without snooping around and showing him the evidence he leaves. Then he just gets mad because I'm going through his things. I don't want to be taken like a fool. and I would rather what he's drinking and how much than be left in the dark.
Am I just paranoid? Is the nyquil and wine not part of his drinking problem? I can tell he's not drunk during the day, which is a huge improvement, but he wont take my suggestions of melatonin or valerian root or kudzu. I just don't want things to get out of control and I want him to be healthy, happy, and safe.
He is lucky to have u...there is alcohol in nyquil...isnt there? not sure but it could trigger him to crave alcohol....sweety..until he is ready to be sober..u can not make him...does sound like he is moving forward...and he is not in denial///that is positive!
He definitely should not be using the Nyquil. Yes, it's got enough alcohol in it to start him off drinking full scale again. You are right to be worried about the acetaminophen & alcohol combo. Unfortunately, if they convince themselves that the Nyquil is harmless they start to take more & more of it & at high doses it is VERY damaging to the liver. The wine as you already know has to go. When I was drinking (I was into vodka) I used to tell myself that a little beer was OK because I only abuse hard liquor. There are just SO MANY lies we tell ourselves & others that care about us. I would confront him, but not in an angry manner. Instead, make sure he knows that you are speaking up out of love & concern. May God bless you both.
I couldn't sleep tonight because when he got into bed, his breath smelled like liquor. But I've been wrong before. I don't know how to talk to him about my concerns without driving him into more shame, and deeper into his habits of hiding. :(
The lies we tell ourselves////can we can them and save them on a dvd? LOL...lies/denial/all of it leads nowhere...we do it...but why? i guess for an excuse to do something we know we should not do....understanding this cycle is so important
I would not mix alcohol with Nyquil. That can be dangerous. Can damage liver I think and I heard that when you "combine alcohol and ANY downer (Nyquil, in this case), you run the risk of seizures, coma, and death."
Also, you shouldn't mix NyQuil with Tylenol. Tylenol is a brand name for acetaminophen. You should look into information about a drug before taking it, prescription or not. Under the label of NyQuil cold/flu it mentions that you should not mix NyQuil with acetaminophen, because NyQuil already has quite a bit of it in it.
Also, you can read up on Nyquil Liquicap and find out about allergic reaction symptoms as well as a list of drugs that can have an effect on Nyquil Liquicap
Here's a very informative site about Nyquil Liquicap that lists serious side effects, etc
"Avoid taking diet pills, caffeine pills, or other stimulants (such as ADHD medications) without your doctor's advice. Taking a stimulant together with cough or cold medicine can increase your risk of unpleasant side effects."
"Do not use this medication if you are allergic to acetaminophen, dextromethorphan, doxylamine, or pseudoephedrine, or to similar medications such as other decongestants, diet pills, stimulants, or ADHD medications. Do not use this medication if you have used an MAO inhibitor such as isocarboxazid (Marplan), phenelzine (Nardil), rasagiline (Azilect), selegiline (Eldepryl, Emsam), or tranylcypromine (Parnate) within the past 14 days. Serious, life-threatening side effects can occur if you take a cough or cold medicine before the MAO inhibitor has cleared from your body.
Before taking acetaminophen, dextromethorphan, doxylamine, and pseudoephedrine, tell your doctor if you are allergic to any drugs, or if you have:
alcoholism or cirrhosis of the liver;
heart disease or high blood pressure;
a thyroid disorder.
If you have any of these conditions, you may need a dose adjustment or special tests to safely take this medication.
FDA pregnancy category C. This medication may be harmful to an unborn baby. Tell your doctor if you are pregnant or plan to become pregnant during treatment. This medication may pass into breast milk and could harm a nursing baby. Do not use this medication without telling your doctor if you are breast-feeding a baby.
Artifically-sweetened liquid forms of cough-and-cold medications may contain phenylalanine. This would be important to know if you have phenylketonuria (PKU). Check the ingredients and warnings on the medication label if you are concerned about phenylalanine."
When I first had a BIG alcohol problem, I was drinking huge amouns of vodka. Subseqent relapses never involved 'strong' drink, just wine and beer because I figured that was less of a problem and would be easier to stop. Now, whilst it's true that I never got into such a terrible state drinking the weaker drinks, I still ended up in a bad way. I'm of the opinion that once you have an alcohl problem, any kind of alcohol is going to be bad news for you so to say 'I just had a glass of wine' is a nonsense really. Alcoholics don't just have a glass of wine, if there's a bottle, they'll drink it. It goes with the territory. If the bottle you found was open, I bet it was empty.
One other thing, I used to bare faced lie about drinking even when challenged by my wife because she could smell it. Somehow, I regularly managed to convince her she was wrong - but she never was. So when you say you've been wrong before, maybe you haven't.
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