Relapsed

I was going on day 20 or so and I relapsed.  What a waste of time.  I went through the w/d's cold turkey and suffered for 4-5 days.  I was starting to feel great.  Then the cravings came and I caved in.  I only have a few left, maybe enough for a week or so.  I guess I will start the w/d's all over again. But what will stop me from using when the PErcs become available again?

JOE

[FLaddict]

there you are.. was starting to wonder about you. now i know..joe, it happens, we are drug addicts.. now its time to make the decision and start again.. we are here for you.

[gjgjgjgjgjgj]

I appreciate everyone being here.  I feel SOOOOOOO guilty for relapsing.  I just don't know what is going to stop me next time meds come available to me.  I think that I felt I could handle them this time and take them one or two a day, but not every day.  I was wrong about it though.  I started out OK and in just a day or two I was using just like I was before I went COld turkey.  Now I have to look forward to the w/d's again.  I tried to tell myself before I used that the w/d's were not worth it, but it didn't matter because I was feeling so much better at the time.  

BTW--
I did get high the first couple of days.  Now it is like the old times.  I get high for 20 minutes and then starts the crash, taking more and more to feel good. SOund familiar?

J

[vicaddict]

Hey hun!
WOWWWWWW....Like I said there must have been SOMETHING in the water for alot of us.

Alot of us relapsed the past week or 2...how odd is that!?

You can do it again hun....I say that to you and i am scared as all hell!

But hey..we are all STILL here together, and we all will get through this.
We have to!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Huggs and am glad to see you back!
(Not glad you relapsed, don't get me wrong there!)
Huggs
Tracy

[gjgjgjgjgjgj]

Thanks for the words of encouragement.  Did I take that message to mean that you have also relapsed in the past?

It is SOOOO tough.  The guilt has taken me over.  I am now wondering if I will EVER get better.

JOE

[vicaddict]

Oh yeah, you guessed that one right! I was doing awesome on my last taper...gave my pills to my frind...but I caved in, went and got my refill w/o he rknowing and here I am again!

So there is you, me, nefresh, and buggsy who all relapsed recently. Was so odd to see everyone post TODAY with the same situation.
Poor bugs just had surgery so he was given pain meds and most definately needs them for sure.

Just wierd how we all came on today! But at least we are all here for each other!!!!!
Huggs
Tracy