Roommate is addicted

I'm not sure what to do . I just moved in with a guy I work with . He was complaining of a bad back so I offered him some of my vicodin I had left over from surgery in July . Not knowinf he had an opiate addiction until today. He called me at work and asked if he could have some of my vicodin again , I told him no, I had already gave him 25 of them. I went into the bottle today to  get one and realized he had taken 3 more after I said no. I confronted him and found out he is addicted to them. what do I do. I wont give him anymore and I have already hid them in my room where he wont find them. He has a history of drug abuse and addiction. He cant sleep he was throwing  up last night . He is miserable. I want to help him but dont know what to do

thanks

Tee

[allaboutmary]

Does he want to quit the pills or is he just out of them ? There are so many ways to get clean but none really will work unless he wants it. There are rehab's, tapering, cold turkey, drugs to help detox, N/A meetings etc.... This forum is a great place for information and support but again, is this his choice or just outta pills ?

[tee1972]

He told me he went to the doc to get medication to help with withdrawls . I'll talk more to him tonight when he gets home from work . thanks I hope we can keep in touch if I have more questions

[allaboutmary]

He is very lucky to have you in his life. The fact that you want to help him get thru this is great. We should all be so lucky to have a friend like you.

[notmenow!]

Fist of all you never offer a controlled substance to person, There is a law against that, I am sure you are aware of that. You had no Idea what kind of reaction he would have had, Maybe he was clean when he moved in with you, and you may have caused a relapse. If I were you I would feel pretty sh**y right about now.

Then there is another scenario, perhaps he burnt all his bridges at his previous place he was staying and was asked to leave. He may have brought up the subject in a round about way and you played right into his hands, You have worked with him a couple years and may possibly have a crush on him. Because if you had a regular boyfriend no way would he allow another straight man move in on his territory without a fight. You have his name check the sheriff's data base for previous arrests.

Finally if you do not want to get in over your head, you will ask him to leave, If he is truly an addict he will be seeing multiple doctors to get his medication or he will be using his check to pay for them off the street. The fact he told you he went to the doctor to get medication for the withdrawals should be enough to realize this guy has a problem and I can't get myself involved in a possibly dangerous situation. You know Tee addicts are the best liars there are, He could have just picked up his monthly supply of vicodin, Ask him what the doctor gave him to taper with and do you think I should hold them so you won't be tempted to take more, If he says no he hold them, Then you just moved trouble into your house, Throwing up is not usually a sign of withdrawal people throw up because they took to  many opiates and that sometimes causes the dry heaves, If he is miserable the next day its because he is dope sick. Next he will be late on the rent, You will be missing money you'll ask and he will deny it. I truly hope that I am wrong. But I am sorry to say the writing is on the wall.
But you can't help him your may out of your league!
DO WHAT YOU MUST! BUT DO IT QUICKLY ALL MY BLESSINGS--NOAH

[allaboutmary]

Wow, that was a pretty negative post to someone that came here to help someone. I don't recall Tee even saying he is female. Also I threw up during withdrawl (withdrawal) , everyone is different. Don't want to start anything, I just think we need more information from Tee before we start assuming so much.

[tammyk_40]

Re-read the post. Tee moved in with him. Stop jumping to conclusions!

[blueyz]

Sorry Notme, but that was pretty harsh.  

Most of us here are addicts.  She is not and giving a roommate a vicodin for back pain is NOT  a capitol offense.  Yes, against the law, but I'm sure there were a few broken in your active addiction.... We should be here for help, not judgements.  Glass houses my friend.  

[blueyz]

Try to get more information before making a decision.  You already know this isn't what you signed up for, but if he is wanting to get clean, a clean supportive roommate can help a lot.  I think we can help more when we know more!

Take care and you do sound like a very good friend.

[IBKleen]

WOW..Notmenow, did you get up on the wrong side of the bed? That was down right nasty, inappropriate and rude.

Tee, please keep posting and return here for help. There are many positive people who will help you if they can. Take care of yourself.

[notmenow!]

To all the that thought I may have been a little to harsh I apologize to Tee. But you did give him 25 vicodin's as you said. And its true if I was not concerned for you I would not have put it out there like that. And yes it is true addicts are some of the best liars ever, especially when they are using. My intention was to warn you about what addicts are capable off. Perhaps I responded the way I did because I had a roommate that was active and took me for $5000.00, Regardless I am not the type too sugar coat serious situations, Sorry but do you really want to make his problems yours, You are not prepared for this. Tee are you male for female and who's apartment is it yours or his? I ask this because the section in my post where I suggested that perhaps you had a crush on this person was somewhat  inappropriate

To the four other people who focused on my post instead of Tee's after slamming me. What words of wisdom did you all pass along to Tee?  I am a PM patient on suboxone for the last 7 months and that was after back surgery, Although my post was direct and to the point I still think It may save Tee a great deal of pain and suffering should Tee take my advise.

[FLbella]

WOW, that was super harsh!  

I have vomited from w/d's before simply because I missed a dose of my meds, not because I ran out... everyone is different.  

and NOAH... Why are you so bitter and judgemental?  You even hopped into one of my threads before asking me how I compare myself to addicts now with a snide attitude.  (I am only on narcotics for pain management, my addiction has never been with pills, but I fail in the alcohol department and I am a severe alcoholic).  Either way, your posts are not only discouraging, it seems as if you are harboring resentment and you shouldn't take it out on others that are here seeking help.

[blueyz]

Notme...a quote from your last post.

"To the four other people who focused on my post instead of Tee's after slamming me. What words of wisdom did you all pass along to Tee?"

If you read the thread, you will see that I posted to you and then in a separate post also responded to Tee.  Does this answer your question?

I am sorry you had a bad roommate situation.  I think alot of us have.  I know I had a horrible one and we was using meth and I didn't know it until later.  So I know what it's like.  We have the value of addiction experience and can help others WITH compassion, caring and understanding.  This should be a safe place to do that.  While the rest of society judges addicts, we can be there to help with a little bit of empathy.  I see your intentions were good, but a curt and judgemental response will not help.  

[tee1972]

Okay, We moved in together and no, I dont have a crush on him. He was working over the road and said he had bad back problems and did n ot have time to go to the doc to get his meds could I give him mine and when he got back he would go to his docs to get them back. How was I to know he was lieing or that he was addicted to anything. We drive limo together and we get random drug tested so I had absolutly no  reason to think he wouldbe on drugs. I understand what your saying Blue and I also appreciate you and  everyone else that is responding . I'm scared but we are both on the lease , I feel I should give him one chance then do something else . I feel really bad for him and want to help him but I dont want to get sucked in because his mom  says he has let everyon e down  in his life because of drugs. Wish I would have talked to mom before we moved in. I told him I felt aweful for giving him the vicodin and he said he would  have justr bought them, he said I saved him money, as he pays 5.00 for one .

I'm scared and  also feel sorry for him. WHATN DO I DO

[blueyz]

Okay...Now that I have more info, I would highly suggest you get out of this situation.  He is definately a drug addict.  I have let people use my pills before (long ago) and I knew they were not addicts.  But if he is telling you about seeing a Dr. to get a script and then also telling you that you saved him $ cuz he has to pay 5 bucks for them, then he's getting them from the street.  I can't comment on his pain because I don't know.  Many addicts live in legitimate chronic pain (myself included) and that is how a lot of us got to be addicts.  

I know you signed a lease, but go talk to your apartment manager.  Be honest if you feel you can.  I can tell you the apt manager would not want an addict in the complex...Bad for business and never know what undesirables he would attract to the property.  Be frank and let her know you had no idea this was happening until after the fact.  I have had to break a lease before for safety reasons and I was not penalized at all.  It's worth a shot.  Offer to them that you would like to stay and try and find a new roommate.  Or if he won't budge, you will have to leave.

Both of your names are on the lease correct?  Trust me, this will haunt you for a long time, ie your connection with him.  Background checks for jobs, loan applications, etc.  If he can't hold up his end of the bargain for payments for utilities and rent, it will reflect negatively on you.  

Many active addicts struggle with day to day activities such as GOING TO WORK, being dependable, financially unstable due to buying the drugs off the street.  Some will trade items for drugs (stolen goods, maybe from your house)...If any of this happens, your name WILL be involved!  I know this sounds extreme, but I've seen it happen over and over again.  I've seen unassuming roommates get their door kicked in by police on search warrants due to the crimes committed by the other person living in the house.  Also who is to say who he will have over?  Dealers, other addicts?  Opiates may not be his only vice (many are poly-drug users).  This could get dangerous.

I will share my roommate story in a nutshell.  I was in my early 20's.  Needed a roommate and had a guy referred to me by a friend of a friend of a friend... I checked out his referenced and confirmed his employement.  All seemed okay.  Within a month of moving in, I noticed odd behavior.  He would lock himself in his room for days, not go to work, lost his job.  His skin always had sores and he was a picker...He was hawking his belongings for rent $.  He never paid the utilities.  I finally kicked him out. He had racked up $1600.00 on phone sex (on my phone, in my name!) and said he didn't have the $ to pay it back.  (found out he was a meth addict)

Before he left I "found" the title to his car, which was a piece of junk, but worth some $ none the less.  He packed up and left me with months of unpaid rent, phone bills and utilities.  

Months went by and never heard from him.  Then one day out of the blue he called "pretending to be Steve".  Telling me my old roommate had stiffed him too on a roommate situation and had heard I had the title to his car.  Of course I knew if was my old roommate, (recognized the voice) but played along with "Steve".  "Steve" offered to meet and he would let me have the car if I paid him what the roommate owed him.    

I "agreed"  but had my own plan.  I took a couple friends that he didn't know and had them be look-out's for safety reasons. I "arranged" for the car to be pulled over in a traffic stop ( I have friends).  Waited until the car showed up (which was being driven by some dirtback junkie who told me he had been approached by a guy asking him to drive the car to me in exchange for $.)  The officer stopped him for a legit traffic violation, the junkie driver had no license, was on parole for drugs, had paraphanelia on him and said the guy (roommate) was watching all of this and was scared if he didnt show up w/ the money.  The officer told him he could go to jail (for a parole violation) or be on his way after he handed over the keys.  He chose option B and I drove off in the old roommate's car.  I sold it several weeks later and paid off the a s s h oles debt.

Ahhh revenge is sweet.  

I should repost this story for everyone...It's a good one!

I told that not so nutshell story to give you an idea of what CAN happen when addicts live under your roof.  

Good Luck Tee and keep us posted!

[tee1972]

Hello everyone,

well he came home today and seemed to be high, very happy and eyes are semi  strange . I snooped in his bag and found some  pill bottles . Oneo fthem is soma and has some girls name on it . I had soma and it was for bad headaches. what else is it for . is it an addictive drug.

I'm sorry you had to go thru that. Its aweful what drugs can make some one do huh ? I just asked him what he is high on and he said he smoked pot with a guy from work . I dont do any drugs so they are all bad to me .I'll keep you posted as to what goes on and how he acts

[notmenow!]

Tee, Soma is a muscle relaxer, they contain a tranquilizer called Miltown, they are addictive, If he takes to many he will lose his muscle coordination, The user acts as though they are drunk when not taken as directed this effect will come on rather quickly, If he is using soma he is more than likely mixing them with the vicodin as the two together produce a euphoric effect, for info on drugs go to website www.Drugs.com there you will be able to get information on any drug you want, As I said in my post for which I caught for. That this guy was trouble. It's funny about 90% of what I felt through your post was true. I never meant to offend you in any manner. I only tried to tell you what to expect- Have a good night and Thank God that you are not like your roommate.----------NOAH

[tee1972]

I appreciate every thing you have said and I think your right about him, I feel bd for him though. I'm putting  a lock  on  m bedroom door and like I said thefirst time he does nothave bill mon eyt, he is out .

[notmenow!]

Your were so right about his mom telling the truth about, Most moms try and protect their sons even if it means lying. This mother is so fed up that she put it out there for your benefit. So you can beat him to the punch. Now the urine's at work , as long as he has a script for the drug he's cool. He had his rent for Nov ?. When does your lease expire. I would not go to management without consulting free legal aid, Go over copy of your lease read the fine print first. In the mean time play it cool. Addicts are very unpredictable and revengeful. Everything is going to be alright just be patient and keep smiling. By the way you have a cool job!-----------------NOAH

[tee1972]

Noah,
Hello, yes, he paid november rent two weeks early. We just moved in together last month, the lease is a 6 month lease. We are renting a house . If I wanted to get him out I could . The landlord does not like him. He acts like the landlord is invisable when he is around.And won tlook him in the eyes so the landlord thinks he is strange. Also he started a fire outside ( saying he does not know how ) and caused damage to the outside of the house oweing the landlord 200 bucks to fix mthe damages. So I think if I told the landlord about Him, I think he would kick him out ..

I love the limo job its awesome.

Where you from Noah ? is that ok to ask in the forum ? Are you an addict or what

[notmenow!]

I CANT BELIVE IT I JUST TYPED YOU THIS REALY NICE POST ABOUT MY STORY AND I HIT THE ESCAPE BUTTON AND LOST THE WHOLE THING, I STILL CANT BELIEVE IT BUT I AM FROM FLORIDA. IN FACT CLICK ON ANY BLUE USER NAME AND IT SHOWS THEIR PROFILE. YOUR USER NAME IS BLACK . YOU MUST HAVE SET IT UP AS PRIVATE, EDIT YOUR PROFILE AND CHANGE IT TO BLUE THEN PEOPLE CAN EMAIL YOU AND YOU THEM . ITS DONE THROUGH A LINK SO NOBODY KNOWS EACH OTHERS REAL EMAIL ADDRESS WELL HAVE A NICE NIGHT TEE AND REMEMBER YOU WILL GET THROUGH THIS WITH THE HELP OF THE PEOPLE HERE ON THE FORUM----------NOAH

[tee1972]

Noah, Ok so when do I get my story. Now you have me curious . Its funny I come home from work and am anxious to see if you wrote me anything , I feel l ike melanie griffin in the movie " you've got Mail"    talk to you soon

Christy

[notmenow!]

I emailed you today I don't know ir you got it or not check your email on your computer, Are you and whats his name working this weekend try emailing me, just hit emial at top and enter my user name. Talk to you soon-------------------NOAH

[tee1972]

I cant email you , I dont have your email address , it wants me to put that in teh top of the  page . I got no email from you , Please try again ***@****

talk to you soon

Christy

Nope, not working this weekend. the Limo company isvery slow right now
ok, got to go . a friend just called and he ran out of gas. What a weenie

[notmenow!]

Christy, Hello I emailed you yesterday when I went to my profile and checked for outgoing messages you were there, If you point to my blue user name notmenow! you will see send a message, This gives you the option of sending me a message, So when I logged on at the top where it says inbox yours should have said 1 and if you tried if I sign on it will tell me how many messages. That's like the back up just in case you dont check your email at home what do you have email through yahoo. or hotmail of Gmail or dell myway I have then all but I prefer to use my dell myway and yahoo emails. Your statement were it says it asks for my email address, You enter my user-name, notmenow! medhelp has my email on file and will link it to what ever email you gave then when you signed up. Try that tomorrow as I am getting to tired to stay awake as it is 12:40am.
What ever happened with the soma incident, did he get realy messed up or did he take then as directed which is usually no more than 3 times a day. This is one mucle relaxer that doctors should only subsribe in small amounts like write for 21 tablets with 3 refills and write on script do not fill early, as some pharmacies will fill up to 5 days early depending on the schedule of the drug, I told you all drugs are scheduled 1 are illegal drugs like weed and cocaine, a 2 are opiates like percocet and oxycodone in all its different formulas, #3 like soma,xanax,vicodin,valium,and all the hydrocodone formulas, hyrdocodone you must know it the opiate in vocodin , all these medications can be called into the Pharmacy and allowed 5 refills if authorized, Opiates go for about $1.00 per milligram but that is top dollar. Would you believe that some addicts will pay $80.00 for a 80mg oxycontin which they either chew up and release 12hrs of oxcodone into your system which is highly addictive, as herion, thats why the contry people call it hill billy herion, Well thats the lesson for this evening, We have to fix this email thing , you may have to edit your profile to accept messages, although now that I think about it I  have a friend in AK their username is black like yours. I am going to get to the bottom of this . I'll write one of then and ask how you have to set up your profile , I too tired to spell check this , did you download the new google bar that spell checks anything you type no more word perfect,Talk to you soon-----------------NOAH













t

[tee1972]

Yup, I got your email and I responded to you , I hope you can get it . Talk to you soon


Christy

P.S. Thanks for the lesson

[tee1972]

I  just talked to my roommate and he is taking suboxone . He is one week into it . His doc told him that once he is finished with this treatment he will giv ehim a medication that will help him with a relapse. He said this medication mazkes it so he does not feel any high or anything when hetakes the Vicodin so he will not crave it anymore. Has anyone heard of this before


thanks to all

christy

[notmenow!]

Suboxone yes! It is a life saver in fact I have been on it for 7 months now following my surgery. How ever it is very expensive pharmacy price is about $6.29 a pill it can run into some big bucks, Between the DR visit and medication it could cost $1000.00 a month easy. has he shown you the pill it is orange rectangle with N-8 on one side. If hes on this he has taken his first positive step to recovery and a relief for you as it does block the effects of opiates to a certain level. Does he have health insurance? I hope. What is he doing a detox or something a little longer which is probably what he needs, To get more info for your self go to suboxone.com and read up on it. This is great news. Gotta go do some errands-----NOAH

[tee1972]

He does have insurance he said all he has to pay for is the doc visit his insurance pays the suboxone. He said the doc bill is 40 and thats all he has to take


I'm very proud of him

thanks noah

tee

[notmenow!]

the doc bill is 40.00 is that a copay because the average price for this specialty is about $150- to I have heard as much as 600.00, for the evaluation, And another fact is only certain MD can write for this medication as it requires a special DEA waiver, Say to him that your regular doc can give prescribe you the suboxone, He may be getting them off the street as well, I say this because he has such a history of being a snake, Ask the milligrams he is on the max is 32mg he should be on about
12-16mg and the soma in his system would have disqualified him if he did not have an rx, go to suboxone.com and do the MD locator and find the closest MD based on zip codes you enter yours and then they search for the closet in to you. it will ask how far you would travel but 50miles in. I hope what I'm thinking is not true. Has he shown you the bottle yet or said how long the treatment is,
I only suspicious because I want you to remain safe, talk soon------NOAH

[tee1972]

I will be back home in 5 days and I will ask him thoser questions, if he is lieing I'm going to be  really pissed at him, I"m going to go to that web site right now andf I'll let you know

[tee1972]

I cant believe there are 25 doctors that are certified to sell sub in a 20 miles raduis from my house

[tee1972]

I cant believe there are 25 doctors that are certified to sell sub in a 20 miles raduis from my house

[notmenow!]

you still need to do a  little research in terms for charges for treatments w/sub and do they take ins as i explained to you in detail in my message, I bet you dont find one that will treat you for 40.00 for real-Nealf--NOAH

[Savas]

You're both on the lease? that's a problem. Whether you like it or not, you'll be held accountable for anything he does wrong, damage or non payment wise. Your only option if it doesn't work out is to find a new roommate or someone to take over the lease, not an easy task. Legally, you're in a very sketchy and dangerous position. Is this a standard one year lease? Ar there any additional clauses?

Otherwise, it sounds like he's going to be given naltrexone, which is an opiate blocker. It does nothing to help with cravings or the psychological side of addiction. Most people just stop taking it and wait the day or two for it to clear their system so they can start using again.

Not to say he may not make it and stay clean.

Be very wary of sharing any negative information with your landlord. He may seem like your friend, but he's in a business relationship with you first and foremost, Remember, if this situation goes bad, you don't want to give him ammunition to use against you if you end up in court...

Also, you may want to check out in a roundabout way if the limo company has a problem with him being on suboxone. Some places won't allow their workers to be on any drugs, legally prescribed or otherwise. Especially drivers. That's a very sensitive issue in this country right now, what with a number of recent court cases involving accidents and sub/methadone patients being in accidents and killing other drivers on the road.