The battle is on

[freshstart01]

20 days of norco ( weened for 7) days prior to c/t . Im having social anxiety. Down. Clouds, and cravings. Today su cked! I use to b so out going , happy before pills , during,  but not now. I was the strong leader. Now I'm frail - weak . Does this go away? Down and out
Kim.

[freshstart01]

He doesn't know I took a few or 1 a day for a few days. Since it doesn't make me act different, he can't tell and I can't tell him. He would be disappointed to no return. It just took a little of the depression away. That's why I saw dr and told him- why he gave me wellbutrin . I just want it to work. The depression was horrible. Is I should say. I haven't taken a pill in over 24 hrs and feel okay-, just want this to be over. I read somewhere we can have an Endorphine Deficiancy, thus equalling depression when we stop. Believe me- I ran, ate good, took amino acids, ate chocolate, had sex. Still was down in out 21 days into sobriety. Could not stay awake at work. So I found a few ( again) stash, and took 1 pill for 4 days. It evened me out. Not great high mood, but just enough to get by. Would struggle at night at home with energy. So my plan is to take new medication. I know it takes sometime to kick in- the anti depressant that helps dopamine receptor and cravings, and pray it's over with. It's all mental. Cloudy days. No pill today. And no aftercare. It's just not an option to me. I slowly got myself into this mess, and I have to slowly get out on my own. ... Thanks for kind words again.

[atthebeach]

hey kim,
i just on another thread you started wellbutrin. that could take a couple weeks to work, so give it time. were you ever able to set up some counseling or attend any support groups? have you been going to church? i want you to have as much encouragement and support as possible. is your husband being supportive?
you can win this battle. addiction is a war for your mind,soul,spirit,emotions and body. you have to be the victor. please pray and ask the LORD to help you fight this battle. it can be won.
keep the faith,
debbie

[gnarly_1]

NO WITHDRAWALS but it will mess with your mind and now your brain chemistry has to start fresh this is not ez to do its why we recamend aftercare so strongly it helps you avoid these pitfalls that are so common as an addict you need to change the very way you think and reason.....most people need help doing this the help is free for the taking it can make or break you.....for now pick yourself up dust yourself off and move forward with your recovery
good luck and God bless.......Gnarly

[freshstart01]

I shouldn't have much withdrawal right?

[freshstart01]

At 21 days
I caved. Took 1 pill . Then another pill the next 2 days. Doesn't get me high. Just energy. Starting over. No more pills. I found 4 more. Yuck. Cravings and fatigue. Starting fresh again!

[gnarly_1]

well you can start feeding your brain what it needs to heal I am a firm believer in good nutcian and we cant eat enough of the good stuff to get there so supplements help
I started on whey protein shakes you can pick up a 2lb can up at walmart for 15 bucks
its loaded with amino acids along with vitamins as well as the protein .....I only wish I had found out sooner about this the chocolate flavor is good you just mix it with a glass of milk drink 2 a day this is not a quick cure but rather the building blocks on what your brain needs to heal it really dose make a difference its gradual but noticeable ....liquid b complex helps with energy and if you got the extra money you can look up the amino acid protacal and get the specific aminos....I found the whey protein shakes worked good and its cheep cheer up I realize a dark cloud has settled over your camp but it will go away I promise its just going to take some time try the shakes you will be surprised good luck and God bless.....Gnarly    

[freshstart01]

Thx gnarly. I feel depressed. Still no energy. Anything I can take for motivation/ energy? My brain is sad. :(

[gnarly_1]

HI Kim glad you posted .......you go threw phases as you go threw this you will have you good days then some not so good days its pritty normal from where your at .....try not to get discouraged you will start to feel better again but fro the first 90 days your brain chemistry is going to be all over the place its just the way it is and with it your emotions will be up and down to.....I wissh there was an ezer softer way but for most of us we ride the roller coaster
up and down the best thing you can do is exersize eat right and put some form of aftercare in place to help you threw the hard times keep posting for support we all want to see you make it congrats on 20 days clean thigs will get better trust me once you start living in recovery life can be a beautiful place again so chin up dont drop your guard and just keep doing what your doing if thinks get tuff add more aftercare it really dose help with the mind games good luck and God bless........Gnarly