Tollerance, Physical dependence, addiction.

[beentrying2quit]

I have fought, screamed, kicked and cussed out loud for the past 6 months trying to quit these damn hydros.  I do have chronic pain and I've been taking up to 5 5/500 tabs for the past year and have slowly worked it down to 1-2 tabs a day.  

The past year 5 months I have been scared chitless worried I'm an addict.  I just read a post explaining the difference between tollerance, physical dependence and addiction and that post has litterally saved my life.  I'M PHYSICALLY DEPENDENT!  I'm trying desparately to get off the damn things but cant seem to get past the last pill.

The post I read stated that "physical dependence is the result of physical changes in the brain.  It is not a matter of willpower rather actual physiology."  THATS ME!

My question is...can this problem reverse itself?  Today I only took one 5/500 pill but cut it in half and took the first half this morning and the second halp mid afternoon.  It made all the difference in the world...my anxiety went away, the cold sweats/chills went away and I was able to focus.  I just cant believe my body still reacts this way at this low doseage.

By the way..the post I read was by "wait2long" and it has been the most helpful post I have read in a long time.  Proof that this forum REALLY does help people like me.

I LOVE YOU FOR THAT!

[wait2long]

I am glad this information was so helpful to you...and i sincerely appreciate the kind words....thank you, you just made MY day....XXOO

[cdentata]

I posted that original thread question, although I am glad not to be technically an addict, I still don't like the "dependance".  This is how I got "dependant" and what led up to pain management.  

I have a very physically demanding job (wildland firefighter) and I had to take the pills to make it from my bed to work and back again.  I spaced them out so that I would get the most relief in the afternoon when everything started to seize up.  I was constantly afraid that my boss would search my company truck, but I had to work.  I was out trying to help a woman fix a fence and I felt a shock from my waist to my hamstring.  I jumped and asked the lady if the fence was turned on, she said it wasn't an electric fence...I looked down and pulled on the fence again and POW!  I got back in my truck, drove straight home and took my meds...they couldn't touch the nerve pain.  That is when my doc switched me to "Combunox" or oxy+ibuprofen.  NUTS.  I then said, I can't do it anymore, I have to get this problem fixed.  He did the calling for me and found the surgeon.  She fixed the problem, but her staff are dumber than a box of hammers.  I didn't like being dependant on the pills to live through the pain.  I didn't like the feeling of "missing them" when I started to taper.  In other words, I feel your pain (no pun intended).  

And I most hated calling in to the pharmacy to ask if a script was called in.  That was humiliating.  I would be trying to stretch the script past the due date and had to just take the full amount prescribed.  I finally figured out that I had to "stay on top" of the pain to keep it managable, not try to play catch up.  My doc closes shop on Friday (small town); but kept me "comfortable".

I really feel like I am in the short rows now.  The nerves have been released in my back and although I am still on a cane, I can at least sit now.  Being reassured by my doc that the Ultram wasn't the Grim Reaper and I wasn't psycho or physically addicted, helped ease my conscious.  But I have to remember that the threshhold between the two can be crossed if I don't take the meds just for pain.

Since you are in chronic pain, see a doc and have it evaluated.  It may be an indication of a serious illness.  There may be a better med out there for you and you wouldn't need the hydros.  If you are truely dependent it wouldn't be hard to switch.  I mixed and matched tons of times.

For me Lyrica was the worst drug I have ever experienced.  I actually had a one in a blue moon side effect...hallucinations.  I thought it was an acid trip.  Bizarre.  Neurotin caused me to gain 25 pounds in 6 weeks.  The TENS unit was a real b98078th.  I hated it, I hate electricity.  I grew up on a farm and hate electric fences.  When one doc, not my PCP, told me to try it; I did and it got quickly sent back to the place from whence it came!

I hope this story has helped someone.  I know it is far from unique.  I just wanted to express that although I am "dependant" and soon hope to be out of pain and off even teh Ultram, it is not a cool place to be.  My doc said staying with the low dose of Ultram for up to 3 months wouldn't really be a problem, it isn't even a controled substance...only as prescribed though.  So I still have to watch myself and not take anymore than the bottle says on the bad days.

[wizzow]

i've been trying to quit for about 5 years.  i would kill to get by on even 5 5's a day.  my mom would be so proud.  i take on average about 8 10's a day.  i would say it's more of an embryo than anything else.  if you can break a 5 in half than please, i beg you, never ever take one again.