Triggers!

[PurrfectlyKrazy]

As some of you know my husband and I have been through hell the last year.  He's had 2 major surgeries, back to back, radiation and then chemo.  He's at about 50% now I think.  He's also back in the hospital.  He made it the longest this time (due to congestion in lungs)....but everytime he gets it ...well it is back to the hospital.  This is ONE of my triggers.  I have to do SO much in addition to being at the hospital practically non-stop.  I don't want to even explain how many mistakes I've stopped from happening from my being at the hospital so much.  My pastor has been calling daily to support me....and, as explained before, only 2 NA meetings in area per month.  I need some extra support for aftercare right now.  I don't plan on taking anything...if anything my emotional state of mind is a wreck.....I don't know how much longer I can be so strong for him,  Any suggestions???

[devisatedandscared]

How are you today sweetie...ive been keeping you close to my heart...please update when you can...hugs

[lulu747]

I swear I responded to this earlier today.  Did it get erased????

In any case-
I hope you are getting some much deserved rest this night.  Much love K-
You are in my thoughts and prayers-

Bless..
Lu

[devisatedandscared]

I'm so sorry your going thru all of this. Your a very strong person, I know that. I agree with the others, you must take frequent breaks. I'm so glad your sleeping at home. My son has had 3 open heart surgeries, and I slept bedside for weeks at a time. It was so taxing on me. You definitely need to take advantage of all the support available at the hospital. Ask a nice nurse that you like...they are amazing tools to get you what you need. Don't be afraid to tell them your situation, and how your feeling. I promise they will help however they can. I completely understand how stressful it is being in the hospital and worrying about every little detail. Try and have faith, I know its terribly difficult, as it was for me too. I'm not sure if it was a blessing or a curse to have the medical knowledge I do. And if your anything like me, your questioning everything. I have been praying for you both. Keep posting...love ya

[Sonrissa]

Hey Purrfectly, I'm so sorry you are going through all of this. Stress can really impact your health. It sounds like you have found a good solution with the AA/NA meetings at the hospital. I believe that most hospitals have patient advocates. You might check and see if your hospital does. Then you can talk with them about the issues with your husbands care. A patient advocate will represent you and your husband, and help to ensure he is getting the proper care. Also, try to get yourself outside in the fresh air for some walks. Truly it will help to clear your head, and relieve stress. Plus, it doesn't cost anything. Take care. I'm keeping you and hubby in my prayers.

[luvdolphins58]

Does hubby suffer from chf. Is this why lungs get congestion. Do u watch his diet do u cook with no salt at all. Besides that. When ever I'm in hospital for chf. Im like 3 or 4 people a day but only few minutes at a time. So please take care of u first. Only reason I say stay longer if care there is substandard. If thats great go take care of u. Again my personal experience. Praying for u.

[PurrfectlyKrazy]

No money for pampering...not even to eat out....unfortunately.  I settle for a kitty cat and a book :-)  I do come home to sleep at night otherwise I would be crippled!

[Jinx_777]

just make sure you take time for yourself during these stressful times.
you don't have to be at the hospital all the time and can take a little time for you.  whether that be getting a massage, doing a little shopping, eating at your favorite place, movie, whatever you enjoy.  
when things get stressful, instead of thinking of a pill, pamper yourself and then hit a meeting.
i know when i am in the hospital, i don't really like someone there all the time because i feel like it is rude to sleep or watch a show.  lol

[Ejm7263]

Great. GOD bless you'll & I'm praying for you both. Healing for your husband.

[PurrfectlyKrazy]

Thanks everyone.  Unfortunately the internet service at our hospital is not the best but I did talk to the social worker who came in to J's room and she told me they had an aa/na meeting there 3 times a week so I'm able to make use of that.

J should be home by the weekend or Monday at the latest.....this is something that occurs occasionally when his chest gets congested then, because of his history, they do every test known to man before they let him out.

My doctor has also put me back on clonidine (I used to take for blood pressure).  He's wanting to make sure my pressure stays steady and it has the added benefit of eliminating cravings (if any).

All in all can't complain...now if I can just avoid the hospital myself...on my 4th course of antibiotics for the diverticulitis.  If it doesn't clear up will have to go on i.v. antibiotics.

[dominosarah]

You are overwhelming your brain right now.  That creates alot of chaos.  You spoke of stopping mistakes made at the hospital......I am not sure what you mean but if it is something to do with the care of your husband you need to talk with someone at the hospital about this.  That is not your job to make sure they are doing their job.  It's that accountability thing.  Have you made some friends at NA?  Call them and see if they want to get together for coffee or something.  You need to give that brain of yours a break......

[VICourageous]

I understand your situation very much! I was on this site day in and day out for almost 2 years. Most of the MH Family on here supported me & really alot when I hit my 16m as my Family was dieing all around me. They kept me together. Plus I had to UP my Support..NOW last month I had to go to the hospital and found out I had 2 blocked arteries over my heart. One has a stent but the other is still blocked. At 23 months I have been a mess..I mean worse then I have ever been..SO what I started to do was look for more and more Support in anyway I could. I decided I needed Church based NA. I am going to grieving groups, I too have the preacher call and I do meet with some of the church...on & on...BUT there are them times we are left alone in our own head..That succckkksss!!! SO I do call some clean friends that I met on here too. I wish I could talk to them all in person. It is hard but you have to keep in touch with others..NO MATTER what or where you do this. I sure do wish you the best and my Prayers go out to the Hub as well..Just stick close to your post as well. Everyone on here are Angels..
Bless

[Ejm7263]

I am going to AA. In 7 days I have found people in just my position. We have an NA meeting about 30 minutes away and I go there to but the AA people have years & years of experience, strength and hope for me. It never occurred to me they would accept me, I don't drink, never wanted to. They don't care. They told me if I wanted to get better & live different they would live & support me. I'm praying for you & your husband. I'm new to this group & so grateful for all of you.
There are also some online NA/AA meetings & what my generation called chat rooms. Hang in there. GOD bless you.

[pinkgirl73]

SMART Recovery does in person, online voice and online chat meetings.   Its hard when you live in a small area.

[weaver71]

Have you tried AA. NA barely exists here as well, but I found that many in AA had a stint with opiates, injuries and surgeries made many alcoholics here understand, even if they didn't get hooked, but many did get addicted and had to detox . AA is every day in most places and often more organized in small areas. It's worth checking out. Bible studies, local gym, group therapy, private therapy, are other places you might find more addicts. Use you phone, call someone in the NA meeting, meet with them or find a sponsor. Read bulletin boards and the web, there are a always addicts looking to support each other. Does your pastor know any addicts at church, start your own group?