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4667286 tn?1357762574

Wanting to quit Lortab...scared

Hello, I am new here, and I am seeking advice. I have been taking Lortab for about a year now. I have suffered with migraines since the age of 13 (I'm 42 now), and have been on every med under the sun for preventitive etc. Well, I had a friend offer to give me a few Lortab to keep for said headaches, and at 1st, I only took them when I had a migraine. Well, I also have everyday headaches, so, I thought I'd take them for that too. Well, back then, I was taking about 20 7.5mg a month. Since then, I found someone to get them from, but I'm taking 10mg, taking 8-15 a day, whether I have a headache or not, and I'm going broke, as I am litterally spending anywhere from $600-1000 a month, and I'm tired. I'm tired of stressing, and I'm tired of being a closet addict. I have ran out a couple of times, and the stomach pain and illness freaked me out, as a matter of fact, I am having anxiety merely writing this, thinking about waking up tomorrow and not taking any, even thought I don't really get "high" off of them anymore.
My question, for those of you who have quit, how long did the withdraws last? Did you find anything out there that helped? Are there any supplements or anything natural that you have found to work? I am feeling desperate, I have no insurance and no real support to help me jump this hurdle. Any and all advice y'all have is greatly appreciated!
Much love, Shannon
16 Responses
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Avatar universal
I can resonate with you about not wanting to tell anyone.. My husband was informed by me and looked at me like I was crazy. He did not get it still doesn't .. He always said weren't you taking as prescribed? I didn't tell him about the visits to my Primary Care this past summer for hitting my knee with my vacuum and then the neck injury from the theme park.. Seriously it should have been Motrin 800 for the knee but I managed 90 Percs and the neck should have been a massage as it was tension but 120 Percs later.. My PCP would never suspect I present as the consummate professional and the master of disguise. But I knew that my daily allotment for RA of 2 Vic and 1 10 MG OC wasn't sustaining me I knew I needed to stop albeit 5 months later I stopped the charade as the desired effect was no longer being achieved and I did not want to be in to deep.  As for support my BFF called me out this summer I denied it to this day my husband knows and thinks its over and I am perfect. With that being said i find venting and getting support from this site a blessing.. My husband will here me typing in bed on my IPad and ask what I am doing and I just say reading and responding as he thinks I am on the Huff Post LOL.  He just doesn't get it and I feel my problem I won't shove it down his throught as he threw up from a Perc after a golf injury requiring a minor knee procedure.. I told him I would put the Percs away incase he needed them and fast forward 7 days they went right in my purse!  At this point, I can honestly say I am DONE with the drama of planning vacations etc around refills.  I went to my RA MD and requested my Naproxen and Plavix and didn't bother with the Vic or OC I don't want to be bothered chasing that anymore!  Good luck you can do it if I can as I overly dramatize my pain.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
That's great you have a person to talk to, she may have some tips for support in your area. I live surrounded by wilderness, NA is usually 3 or 4 younger people, not organized. I go to AA here. I was surprised how many there had or are having issues with pain killers. It's a world epidemic. More people die from prescription meds each year than cocaine, heroin, and methamphetamine combined. AA has changed a lot in the last 20 yrs, more tolerant of drugs. I don't know if they're any better where you live, but your friend may know. You're reaching out in every direction, I'm getting a good feeling about your success. Keep those eyes on the prize, it doesn't take as long as it feels like at the time.
Helpful - 0
4667286 tn?1357762574
I actually did get on the NA website here in my town, the meetings are way limited, and I have transportation issues. I too feel, like maybe I need more help, as I feel that my will power isn't enough to sustain me. So, I reached out to a former coworker/friend who has been sober for 2 years, also from the Lortabs...she is picking me up from work so we can talk. Other than on here, I have admitted to noone about my habit, & I am reaching out to her today, she is a great person and fought very hard for her sobriety. Even dialing the phone made me feel like I was going to have a panic attack, sat in the bathroom at work for about 15 minutes to regain my composure. Who would know that this could be so tough? Geez....
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Have you thought about 12 step meetings? Man have they made all the difference for me this time. I couldn't wean, or taper either. I even gave them to my wife and then found them. I could buy them on the side too. I think it's especially hard for those of us who get them on the street and can't just call the pharmacy and say no more. Dealers don't care, most of them are just trying to pay for their own habit. This time, I did what was advised, and I held the hands of those who had been through it. You can do it, but don't kid yourself. You couldn't taper alone, chances are ct will have those tempting moments too. I really would go to a AA or NA meeting and just listen if you want. I started before I quit and definitely went after. You'll want some aftercare support at some point, why not today, at least check to see where they are. Don't depend on your own strength, you don't have to do this alone.
Helpful - 0
4667286 tn?1357762574
Thank you for the positivity. I am trying to remain calm, it just really really *****...I know I'm not the only one who has gone through this, & it's helps to have input. I thought about weening down, but I couldn't do it, been trying that for over a month, then I would go right back to taking 2-3 10s at a pop, even though I really didn;t even get high anymore...it's the weirdest thig ever. I am remaining hopeful that I can beat this thing. I beat a terrible cocaine addiction, cold turkey when I was a mere 18, and I think I can kick this too, just gotta stay strong....
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Early on, when my dealer would drive by stalking my cash, I used to tell myself it's just my brain in detox. I thought of how my kid will smash his finger. His whole life and existence was focused and consumed in the tip of his finger. You would think he had been hit by a train. It's like his life is over and will never return to being pain free. I reach down and give him a hug and say, "It's just your finger, you're not dying." You know what, he lived and trusts that I was right. I'm sending you a big hug and saying, "It's just your brain, you're not dying." Life will be pain free again, trust me.
Helpful - 0
4667286 tn?1357762574
Thank you! I feel like I'm frickin' dying! I can't think, my body hurts, all I want is to call & get more! I keep telling myself that I will come out stronger for all this suffering, but I feel like absolute ****! If I could close my eyes for one minute I would pass out, I left work yesterday, & other than get up to have diarhea, I slept until the alarm went off this morning for work....I am ready to be through with this...feeling weak...
Helpful - 0
3176864 tn?1391555073
You are in the worst of it right now.  You make it though today, you can make it all the way.

When I was in it bad, I just took it moment by moment.  Music worked, walking a little helped.  Just stay hydrated.  Focus on the moment, and know each one that passes, is one you do not have to relive.
Helpful - 0
4667286 tn?1357762574
Well folks, today is day 2 1/2, no pills...I feel like absolute ****! I had to leave work yesterday from stomach cramps and diarhea. Today, I have a terrible headache, and can barely keep my eyes open, and I'm in a major brain fog...I'm ready for this to be over! All I can think about is calling my guy & stocking up, even though I don't want to. I don't knnow how long this feeling is going to last, but it *****!!!!!!!
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Wow ...reading all these comments, I thought I was alone in this situation...I need help bit I can't take off from work bc I care for my child and I am a single parent so I have to be in the house with her.. I am addicted to Percocet ....I take total of 50 mg a day..either 5s or 10s...what ever I can get...I started to buy them....I am so ashamed of myself and I need to make my life right....I can't do ct bc I have to work everyday... I will try to tapper but what do I do?? Please help me..I want my life back... For me and my daughter..she doesn't deserve this.....
Helpful - 0
2218783 tn?1357571081
I also Got My Pills on the street and I had many sources and at the end I only had one and it was really hard giving that source up But I knew I had to or I would never get off these demons.
I also knew that telling my family friends and especially My Boyfriend of 4 years was going to be hard he had No idea whatso ever. But once I told him and especially him its like the flood gates opened up and this big relief came over me because I ha knew there was no going back and thats your accountability,It was a huge huge step in my recovery and also group meeting once I started going it became important to me to take it all the tools and info I could get to help me through this and as the days past each day I woke up and I would not feel that dread, I always felt before worrying about pills counting them feeling guilty ect. You know the feelings I am talking about.
make your mind up read some post on here get your mind around it and set yourself up for success get the things you will need to get you through the Physical part Immoduim Water/Gatoraid. restless legs By Hylands help with your legs at night when they are heavy and twitching It helps take the edge off. At the bottom of the page is health pages look up thomas recipe very helpful. Most of all get a support system you need it right now. Try not to get yourself so worked up yes detox sux but its not as bad as we sometimes think in our minds . Yes it does sux and at times its like you feel like no way can i do this But YOU CAN just get through each minute each hour and it does get better I promise you. And you will feel better about just life no more pills chaining you down.
Helpful - 0
1970885 tn?1435860428
At this point the last thing you should be worrying about is being judged. That's just foolishness that your head is feeding you. You need to confide in someone; you need a support system. If someone judges you then screw them; they aren't worth your time. Telling my family (wife and kids) was the hardest thing that I've ever done. I'm the father - the rock - the provider - the one with all the answers - the one THEY turn to when they are facing life's problems. I was embarrassed, humbled, ashamed. And I was forgiven and loved and encouraged. They are now a very important part of my recovery. I would have relapsed several times without them.
"I keep telling myself I am strong...I can do this & I am confident that I can overcome this". Again, that is your addict's brain lying to you. Being strong or confident is nothing - this addiction will chew you up and spit you out if you start believing your own BS.  Cut all sources, tell your secret and get to aftercare. That's how you'll - not beat - but be able to live with the addiction.
Helpful - 0
4667286 tn?1357762574
Thanks so much for the quick replies, I am scared and basically alone in this. I have been getting the pills on the street, not through a doctor, so my 1st plan of action is to erase my source's number, permanently from my phone, as he is quick to respond, of course, as he is making a fortune doing what he does. I am so afraid to confide in anyone, as I don't want to be judged. I am human, I just have an addiction, but I am fearful of my family's reaction/disappointment, so I'm not sure how I will handle that aspect of getting sober yet.
I keep telling myself, I am strong, and a year ago, my life was fine without the pills, I can do this, & I am confident that I can overcome this. More than anything I am scared of the withdrawl pain. It's good to know that the physical symptoms will fade quickly. The mental addiction, is worrisome as well, as I mentioned, even the thought of not using makes my heart race, and I almost get weepy, like I am abandoning a good friend or something. I have tried to convince myself to taper off, on several occasions, but before I know it, it's like my mind takes over & I dial the phone and place an order without hesitation, which is why I have to loose the number, because it's almost like my subconscience dials without even any thought given to it.
Thanks for listening...I'll keep you posted, & I really appreciate any input or advice/support.
Helpful - 0
1970885 tn?1435860428
There are some things that will help, as conhall and Leave have noted, but the bottom line is you will have to go through detox, and considering the daily amount you've been using, the first three or four days will be very hard. I lovingly refer to my detox as my days in hell.
I don't want to scare you; I feel that being honest is important. You need to know what's in store so you can ready yourself, physically and mentally. Take time and read the posts on this site. I spent days here posting and reading. The good news is that in just a couple of days the hell will be over. Most of us did this on our own; hundreds of us. And to stress what conhall also said, before you start you need to cut your sources. If you don't, if there's any way that you can lay your hands on pills, then you will. Your head will start talking to you, things like "just on won't hurt", "I need some relief and then I'll continue", "I'll take just one so I can sleep".  Get rid of the meds or you'll be wasting your time. Keep posting.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Just wanted to add my support! Everyone is different but the worst of my wd were over in 3 days. I took multiple vitamins, b12 and stayed hydrated with water and Gatorade. One thing that really helped me was imodium. Not only does it help the tummy troubles it really helped me with the wd. I also exercised daily, did stretches, and took lots of hot baths with Epsom salt. It's not easy but it is doable if you put in the work. Wishing you the best!
Helpful - 0
2218783 tn?1357571081
Hi and welcome to the forum
WDs Last anywhere from 5-7 days and at the bottom of the page in the Health pages is the Thomas recipe and there you will find things you can take that will help you along during this time,
After you get through the Physical part you have the mental part which means your mind wanting them and its hard but you can get through it My best advice and what worked for me was 3 things major 3  #1 got rid of pill source IMPORTANT you must do this or when you are detoxing or even weeks after or months you will think I can just take one and if you know they are there then you most likely will and the cycle starts over again #2 Tell your secret ACCOUNTABILITY get support from your friends and family and also your doctor if you are getting them from Dr. Redflag yourself with pharmacy tell them you are addict and dont want narcotics anymore. #3 Aftercare I joined group therapy and got myself help this way You didnt become addicted overnight and going to meeting or group therapy will help you get tools to stay clean and do things that change the pattern with yourself so you dont relapse.  
You can do this It will be hard but everyday that goes by life gets easier and you will feel better no more guilt no more counting pills or stressing because you are low. Everyday that you are clean the light shines brighter and brighter.
Keep posting You will find alot of support on here.
Helpful - 0
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