What shall i do?

[lostdreams]

I'm totally lost, i was addicted to heroin for 8 years, none of my family knew about this but i'm sure they suspected. I went through my 'turkey' a year ago without any help and it was pure torture as i had to try and hide it. my problem now is that my head feels like it is going to explode, i'm now constantly thinking about heroin again and i just want to talk to my family but they would disown me, i'm sure and i couldn't handle the rejection. To be honest i dont know what point i'm trying to put across here, i think i just need some moral support, lol, can anyone help me please?

[lostdreams]

Hi all, i am soooooo grateful for the support u have all expressed without even knowing me! I will keep posting. One thing that really brings me down is when you hear people saying "once an addict, always and addict" i honestly think to myself 'i hope that isn't true' i cannot go through this for the rest of my life. Anyway, i'm gonna keep my head up high and hope this feeling passes. Thank you ALL again. XXX

[10356]

Hi welcome to the forum I'm an ex Heroin addict myself also moved to a new town to get away from it, I've been clean going on 3 decades you can do this!!! I remember that period of my life vividly (not easily forgotten) Having know one to talk to about it is difficult but you will find on this forum a lot of support. My family knew about my addiction but it was not something we talked about. Keep reminding your self of what life was like when you were using mine suck$d always searching for the next fix. I stole from my family, stores  what have you. Being clean a year is wonderful CONGRATULATIONS you will find the more time you have under your belt the further the craving will be......... And the withdraw yikes you don't want to experience that again and as you know one fix leads to another not worth it at all. keep posting someone is always around willing to talk. This to shall pass take care.

[random288]

Please please please go talk to someone, don't give into these cravings for I feel you will if you don't go talk to someone.  It is never good when evil hides, what I mean by that is you will feel free if you are able to get this out in the open.  I am not an addict, but my ex-fiance is a heroin addict and he has been battling this for about 3.5 years...we just broke up last week, and he is trying out patient rehab again(not sure if that will be enough) anyhow we were to get married in 3 months and I just found  him using again.  I actually was asking him what happened and how this happened again, he said he was feeling very depressed and couldn't stop thinking about using again and then one day he did and of course he couldn't stop!  

You need to go to meetings and seek out some professional help.  You may be surprised at your family if you open up to them.  I was so scared to tell my family that he had a problem, they had helped me plan this beautiful wedding, in tough times your family will help you in ways that you never imagined and you will feel very free from opening up to them.  If you aren't comfortable telling them it's heroin, as I was not comfortable with that either, maybe just tell them you have a serious drug problem and you are seeking help and you just want them to be aware of it or something.  My ex never liked meetings but he has started going again, he said some of better then others but he has realized there is something in each meeting that helps him through.

Please seek help, brighter days are ahead...

[dove3053]

You can always find support here. It's a sad thing but many people don't get family support and I never suggest anyone telling their family because of this. Some family members can handle and deal with it while others just freak out. Have you tried NA?
I went to AA and it was very helpful to me. While this forum is good it's always nice to communicate with people face to face.

You should be proud of yourself for going cold turkey and stopping. It shows you are stong willed, so don't forget that. It's people like you that always impress me.

Stay stong.

Dove

[worried878]

Posting here is great support....do you have a NA group in your area that you can attend...it helps alot too

[VOsRose]

I'm sorry for what you're going through right now.  Find some information on PAWS and read up on it.  It will help you understand why you're having such strong cravings right now.  I, too, and an opiate addict.  My DOC was pills, but I was taking an inordinate amount of them daily and my last detox was very similar to c/t heroin withdrawal.  In fact, the Dr. told me I was the 2nd worst detox he had ever seen...and he had seen many.  

If you can't find a support group (either within or without your circle of friends and family) then this is a great place for you.  It's a great place even for people who have nothing but support surrounding them.  You will meet many, many people here who are going through what you're going through, have gone through it, or are facing going through it.  You will help yourself by helping others.  It's a wonderful medium and there are some wonderfully awesome people here.

Hang in there and realize this is just a window in time and will pass.  Good luck and keep posting!!

Rosie

[gizzy32]

this is one of the best support groups around. as long as you reach out and when cravings come, stand up to them, post on here, anything but use. i do understand why you want to keep it hidden, but trust me that is not a good thing. if you can't talk to family or attend N/A, at least post and vent on here when you need to. im glad to see you doing the right thing, drugs steal us from ourselves and our life.

[VicUser]

Post often. There are many wonderful people here that will talk to you and help you get through the bad times. I consider the people here true friends and would be lost without them.

[lostdreams]

Hi again, no i've never received any support, no-one really knows i've had to hide it so much!!!!!!!!! I've moved to a new town to help me stay clean but having know-one to talk too is killing me. I've cried so much this past couple o days i think my eyes are now dehydrated,lol. I've thought about about looking for some 'aftercare' but it all comes down to keeping it hidden from the people i know. hey, thanks for your support, it means so much to me.
Xxx

[gizzy32]

although i never used heroin, coke was my doc and i know what it feels like when cravings bring you to your knees. so glad your reaching out for support because we all need it. have you attended N/A meetings before?? aftercare is very important, but you have already accomplished so much, you can't turn back. please stick around here.

congrats on your clean time, wish you the best of luck, just never go back please