Where are you Brian? *Open Forum*

[GOD]

Brian- I was concerned that the last time you posted here, you were detoxing with Methadone. Please give us an update! It's been like 4 or 5 days since you have posted.

Everyone try to have a pain-free day!
~~~~Jess~~~~

P.S. this is an OPEN string, so if you have something different to post (any comments or questions) please feel free to write whatever you wish.

[hippy]

good morninng to ya jess, is this post for real.
or loaded with sarcasim.
in any event i have not seen the brian post. last i read
he was on some ungodly high dosage of meadone.

it's turn the clocks back time, here in the east.
the leaves are doing there thing, turning colors.
it was nicw to read chatahan, and her comments
yesterday, very interisting, her link of lack of faith with low self esteem, is someting i will dwell upon.
as far as the steps go , i always like tyo here about them,
i have been across this country finding people who  know
about the 12 steps.
the steps  simplified

1 accept the truth
2 have faith in the truth
3 commit to the truth
4 examine the truth
5 share  the truth
6 want the truth
7 be the truth
8 find the truth
9 recover the truth
10 be aware of the truth
11 live the truth
12 give the truth

peace!@!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[PING]

good morning: hope everyone is doing better. i want to ask one little question, does age make any differnce on getting off oxycontin? i havn't been on it but a few months, but i was on percocet's for 5-6 yrs heavy, would i just be getting off the oxy, or will the percocet still be in me also? i am doing pretty good with my tapering. thanks very much.
                                             lee.

[hippy]

hey , lee
age does not matter , oxy is a lot stronger and
when detoxing off them it is more uncomfortable
than perc's, which is no picnic to withdrawl  off
of.
so in any event , the good thing about the oxy is you are not killing you body with the acetametphine(tylnol)
when ever you decide to kick get rthe receipe and just do it.
peace !!!!!!!!hope you are not in any pain today

michael

[mrrstracy]

It has been a while since Brian posted. In his last post, he was going to the same methadone clinic that I had gone to before and they are constantly increasing your dose! They did that with me for 2 years. I am also concerned about him.
Has ANYONE heard from CinCee??

Tracy

[hellbent]

Age effects so many things, it will most likely greatly affect your recovery time from opiate addiction. You won't recover from a strenuous workout as fast as you used to, nor will you recover from painkiller addiction. That's just the way it is and there isn't much use worrying about it: no way you can ever get younger.

All Oxycontin is is oxycodone. All Percoset is is Oxycodone and Tylenol. They are the EXACT SAME DRUG. With Oxycontin, you just get alot more of it.

[athena]

Hi tracy
I have read everyone of your posts.You seem like a strong person and really put forth an effort to help others.i wish you luck in your recovery.I hope you are able to get your children back with you.
I too have been really worried about Cincee.i hope she's ok.Cin,if your lurking,please let us know how you are.

pixi

[mrrstracy]

Hey, I just noticed something on the posts by our friend. On your posts you have the J and the S capitalized. He doesn't,the latters are all lowercase, so it seems as though he's using variations of the names now.

[mrrstracy]

Thank you for the encouragement. I know one of these days he'll slip up and I'll find him. But until then I have to stay strong and keep optimistic. We haven't come this far to give up now!

[DIRTBAG]

Happy Sunday, I have been looking for ya pixi I changed my name to peagrave but I can't figure out my password, I want to thank you for the words of encouragement you gave me before all the **** hit the fan on the web site and now ith looks like we are getting back to helping each other, I'm so glad about that, keep posting you are a very positive person and I need some of that Peace to you and everybody else I'm off to softball its 11 am and I popped 5 vicodin so far, all I can say is its beter than 7 is it okay to say this stuff I don't want to make anybody mad at me Peace peagravel

[athena]

Happy sunday to you too.yes,5 is better than 7 .You will make it.the hardest part for me was admitting that I was just taking out of habit and I wanted the energy.Now I have a pinched nerve in my back and afraid to take pain meds.lol You seem to have made a very good friend in mrstracy.I feel bad for deserting everyone,I just wasn't sure who I was talking to on here anymore.I finally realized that it really didn't matter if even 1 person felt better because of my encouragement.i just cant get away from the nurse mentality.lolI hope you enjoy the game.keep your spirits up and keep fighting the battle.

pixi

[suzieneedshelp]

I speak to him on yahoo often.  As of yesterday he was fine.   Still on the meth.  Feeling good about it apparently.  He is not on here cuz of all the accusations he says.  Thx,
Suzie

[GOD]

Suzie~~

I just wanted to say "Thankyou" again for that relaxation tape. I listened to it for a half-hour this moring, and I think It REALLY helped with some of my pain... You have a WONDERFULLY relaxing voice.

I'd better stop before someone asks us to take it elsewhere!

I'll call you tonight.

~~~~Jess~~~~

[Francoise]

Are you all aware of the new Bup formulations, one called Subutex and one called Suboxone?

I'm in touch with someone who is using it to detox from heavy oxy use. She's in the second week and reports no withdrawals.

Is anyone here using this new formulation? (I understand it's available only in injectable form right now, but a sublingual form is coming soon). All information would be appreciated.

Here's your link to an info page about these newly approved drugs for detox/maintenance:

http://www.fda.gov/cder/drug/infopage/subutex_suboxone/default.htm

Many Thanks,
francois

[mrmichael67]

Thanks Francois.  They approved it on the 8th of October.

[Thomas02]

At last: the hacker unmasked!

How are you, my friend? I've miseed you. Getting some bites on your web page?

Thomas

[hippy]

hey all, how's life.
life is good here on my end.
not in any pain, no depression.
i am back to work, been haning with my wife.
the tree s are looking so nice with all the colors.
i love this time of year. so glad i am clean and
able to enjoy it.
good oto see the fourm back on it feet.
i miss goldenbears post.
also where you at skipper, i hope not shoveling snow.
jess how are you doing with your pain.
groovy how are you doing on this beautiful sunday.
i hope you computer bugs are under controll.

gwh, where are you hiding , last  i heard you were
off the oxy's and had taken a few vikes.
it is always good to hear your positve comments
so where are some of those positive inputs.
ya got to give it away to keep it.

so to all i hope everybody's feeling good.

i spent many a sunday night thinking , well this was not the
week i was going to get recovery, i was always writing
off the day as a loss and was always looking to the future
for recovery, one day it dawned on me there are no tommorows,
recovery always begins today, i was alway going to quit smoking this sunday, or start lifting weights next week, or start going to church next sunday, my thinking was flawed  by thinking
everything was going to happen in the future,
ive come to realize that recovery begins TODAY, QUITING SMOKING
CAN ONLY HAPPEN TODAY, GETTING IN SHAPE STARTS TODAY,
RECOVERY IS ABOUT DOING WHATS GOT TO BE DONE TODAY.
THERE ARE NO TOMMOROWS,.
this coming from and addict who lived to many wasted days living in the morrow.
it's the old wise saying SEIZE THE DAY. DON'T WASTE IT/
I HAVE WASTED TO MANY DAYS WHEN I COULD HAVE BEEN DOING SOMETHING POSITIVE.
my 2nd x wife came back to live with me when i had a year clean,
and each day i woke up by noon i just knew that this was not the day our relationship was goig\ng to get back on track, so i wrote off the day as a loss. after doing the same thing for 30
days , she left. looking back i would do things differntly
i would do something to make it work instead of waiting for
something to happen.
dead wood floats down stream.

[OxyDout]

I got a promotion last week!!! I'm now an Inside Sales Manager which along with a lot of repsonibility comes a big Salary Increase!!! Either way i will not have much time to screw around on the internet, too much work to do.......... I appreciate you always asking about how things are, your one of the most sincere people on this forum and I appreciate it.  As far as using goes, I haven't used, the last time i said I used a couple of vics was the last time I took anything.  My day consists of work, work and work, then the gym........ I suggest going to the gym, it gives you a very much needed natural high.  Good luck, I'm sure I will post every once in a while, but like I said, I have been given a lot of responsibility and I'm being watched like a hawk because I'm the youngest person in this facility who has become a manager........ very flattering yet very nerve racking, wish me luck, and thanks again. Talk to you soon.

GWH

[hippy]

good luck/
nothiing less expectated from an addict,
we strive to be the best,
a  talented lot we are.

peace!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1

[OxyDout]

thanks, they just sent out an official memo,.... this week is sort of the interum, nothing too time consuming or difficult, but next week will be very challenging.  I wanted to ask how you have been, work,drugs or lack of drugs, family life.....? let me know how you are.

gwh

[OxyDout]

THAT WAS DIRECTED AT YOU HIPPEE, SORRY.......

[hippy]

sounds like good things are happening in your life.
as far as myself, life is very good, we have been in the new house now since late july,  a big beauty of a house.
my sons mid terms are all great, which is good news
he has to keep a  b-plus average, to keep his scholarship.
as far as drugs go , im clean, i never drink.
i only hang out with people who are clean.
im doing great with pain, no pain at all.
i still take the receipe everyday,
i love to watch footabll, collage and pro,
i coach basketball 8th graders, that is a blast.
im like the only coach they ever had who does not yell and scream.
of course the parents love me because of that.
they all write me cards thanking me. for  being so kind.
and then i tell them i used to have coaches who would yell and scream at me , and that  it never did any thing but hurt.

peace!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!all the luck in the world with the new gig.

[FINISHED?]

I've got a question...
Everytime I've posted a question or comment, it's gone within a few hours. Why is this? Are my problems not adequate enough for your site? Are my comments or concerns not valid in the eyes of the "recovered" or recovering? Am I doing something to make sure that what I post stays for only an hour or two as apposed to the others that are archived? I guess there are different levels of addicts & I'm not fortunate enough to be high enough (no pun intended) on your scale to validate my questions with a returned comment or answer. I guess that your "support system" is only for those that have established themselves in your eyes. I don't actually expect any returns on this seeing as that has been the case thus far...but I thought that for the short time it's posted, somebody may have an answer.

[groovygirl]

If you read the posts further down, you will see that there have been some problems here lately.  Many posts have been deleted...not sure why, but it happens to others...not just you.

I cannot remember ever having seen a post from you, but I would not take the lack of responses personally.  I think maybe people have stayed away from newcomers because of all the trouble lately with some weirdo posting unders other people's names.  I had to change my name, because he had been using it...not sure how he did it.

What's your question?  I'll try to help you if I can.

[diso]

Hello everyone,

I have posted here a few times under a different name but felt it was best to change my name with all the recent problems.  I have primarily in the past just a question here or there.  I have started a methodone detox today for a Oxicontin 140mg a day habit.  I have been abusing the drug as I snorted about half this amount each day.  I made several calls last Friday to various drug centers in my area to inquire into programs available.  The only thing I could find was a methadone detox run by the state.

I know very little about methadone.  I really don't know how effective/ineffective it is in helping a person come off opiates.  I would really appreciate some information if anyone could offer.  I am mainly concerned about two things: 1) will methadone work or do I stand a high chance of just getting addicted to it; 2) are the day to day decreases in the amount of methadone a slow painful process or is it a relatively painless taper?  I hope this questions are specific enough.

Here is my story.  I was introduced to oxycontin in April 2002 by a friend who purchased it off the street.  At first, it was just a weekend party thing.  20mg would nearly knock me out.  But I loved the "high" from snorting it.  I soon learned from this same friend about a local doctor that was pretty liberal in prescribing oxycontin if you had proper documentation.  I have a back and neck injury that have bothered me for several years.  My neck is in worse shape than my back with several severe herniations.  I had an MRI done a couple years back.  These injuries flair up from time to time but are not debilitating on a daily basis.  The flair ups, however, are intense.  This was all I needed to get into the doctor and get a prescription.

At first, I totally justified my visits.  I thought to myself, "I have a documented injury and I am being prescribed medicine for it."  I was first prescibed about 20mg of Oxycontin and 20mg of oxycodone a day.  This quickly increased to 40mg of oxycontin a day.  When I first got my presciptions I honestly couldn't use everything I received.  It made me sick.  Over time, of course, my tolerance increased.  I am a walking contradiction though.  I haven't asked my doctor for a higher dose of pills because I believe I would be lying to him so I now buy my shortfall each day.  In other words, I use my prescription in about two weeks and then spend about $100 a day thereafter on my habit.  I haven't told anyone my full story until now.

I feel so ashamed.  Mostly, I am ashamed because many of you here suffer from severe pain and have not abused the meds like I have.  You are victims of merely following doctor's advice.  I started abusing and have only myself to blame for where I am.  My wife knows about my prescription.  She does not know about my abuse.  I don't feel like I can tell her everything.  She would be so hurt and disappointed in me.  She knows I am addicted just not the extent.

It is time for me to quit.  I have been reading posts here for weeks.  I have so much respect for so many of you here.  You are heroes in my eyes.  I am scared about methadone.  I want to be done I don't just want to shift to a different drug.  If that was the case I wouldn't do it.  I would just finally get my prescription increased from my doctor.  I have tried to taper in the past, I just lack the strength.  Methadone seems like a good alternative because it is dispensed by someone else (and I honestly don't know where to get anymore of it).  I have been told that it won't do me any good to take any oxys now because the methadone will counteract with it.

Would I be wiser to do a taper with the oxys with my wife dispensing (she would then need to know the whole truth)?  Or is methadone a good way to go?  

I will start posting more now because the commitment has finally been made to quit.  I would really appreciate any information, thoughts, etc that anyone could offer.

Thanks in advance.

[FINISHED?]

First off, I witnessed the nonsense that went on with this "hacker" & saw how quickly people turned on one another. That was a little discouraging to me. You all seemed to have quite a community going on with each other before that. I would be accepting of that as an answer to my posts being deleted if I hadn't posted before the interuption from a moronic hack. The fact of the matter is that I left a few small questions/ comments long before this & had the same outcome everytime. I find it hard not to take it personally. I see frequent users of this site raeching out & finding a hand everytime. The few times I reach out, I get DELETED! I am battling a vicodin es addiction that I have tried time & time again to kick. Everytime I get 2 days in, I refill. I have access to this drug & started using it responsibly for numerous surgeries & injuries. I know I'll need pain management meds for the rest of my life but my tolerance has grown so high, they just don't work the way they used to. I've gone from taking 2 a day to 10-15 a day in a matter of 3 years. I refuse to go on this "oxy" or whatever that stuff is simply because of the horror stories you've all had. I want to get clean but not at the price of my being able to walk. I'm a 29 year old man & I would like a some what pain free existence but taking that much medication can only hurt. I was curious as to how long I would have to stay clean & hurt severly to lower my tolerance back down to 1/2 a pill 4 times a day? I honestly DO NOT take my meds to get a "high." I take them to get by. It may sound like a good excuse but I have gone 125 days without meds & suffered the withdrawls only to start up again to function in a normal fashion. I know that I need them for pain & not for a reason of psychological dependence. How safe are the alternative meds such as oxy or any other?

[hellbent]

First, this is an addiction forum. It's not for people who are in pain and don't abuse their meds. I have been coming here for awhile, and have seen maybe one person who is a legitimate, non abusing pain patient.

My OC habit was 10 80's a day, 800mgs, every day. When I was nearly homeless and dead, I was able to finally do a taper that took me to about 500mgs a day. Then, I did a 21 day methadone detox. It certainly helped. I still went through an awful period, but I was cold turkeying off klonopin simultaneously.

If you do try to taper, you MUSTY start swallowing your doses. This is THE ONLY way you will be able to taper. You can cut your dose amount dramatically, today, just by doing this.

I have almost 6mos clean and have a life again. You can do it.

[diso]

Thanks for the quick response.  I actually took my first dose of methadone this morning.  I guess I am just scared about whether I made the right choice instead of a taper.  I know first hand that what you said about taking oxys orally will dramatically drop the amount I need.  I switched over to doing half and half about 2 weeks ago and the past 5 days I have snorted nothing.

As far as the 21 day methadone detox you went throuh, how was it?  Could you feel the reduction each day?  Your oxy consumption was quite a bit higher than mine.  Am I reading your post correctly that you did your detox from 500mg of oxy per day?  How much did you decrease the methadone?  The clinic I have gone to wants me on a 60 day taper in which I drop 1mg every other day.  Do you think this is too long/short?

Thanks for the comment about us all being in practically the same boat here.  I guess that's why this is such an important place for me.  I really feel that there is a depth of understanding that is impossible with others who are not addicted.  I think it also forces me to be absolutely honest.  People can see through bulls*&t here a mile a way.  I have become so accustomed to lying to myself and others.  Telling the full truth oddly feels real good.  Thanks again, and a huge congratulations on becoming and staying clean.

[Waking up]

I have chronic bach/hip/cocyx ang leg pian. I was taking 30mg of methadone per day. Today my doctor changed my meds to 90mg of
ms-cotin. Can anyone tell me if i will have any wihtdrawls or anything to that effect, i kow that methadone is a lot stronger. any comments woul be greatly appreciated.

                                    waking up.

[groovygirl]

Hi - I'm sorry I don't have an answer about the deleted posts...don't assume the worst tho.  Today was the first day I saw a post from you, and I answered it right away.  The same would have happened if I had seen your earlier posts.  Let's chalk it up to weird computer flukes shall we?

The real issue is your pain problem.  I think it takes a long time after a habit such as yours to bring your tolerance back down...maybe a year?  Do you have a doctor you can talk with honestly about this?  Oxys are a GREAT pain med if you can take them responsibly.  Plus, you don't have to worry about the acet eating away your liver.  There is also the Duresic (sp?) patch, which is very hard to abuse I think.  I don't know your diagnosis, so I can't say what alternatives would be best for you.

Your best bet would be to talk with your doctor as honestly as possible.  If you are taking huge amounts of vicodin (which you are - I had the same habit, but more like 20+ per day), you are KILLING your liver...seriously.  There are much better alternatives.  

Are you sure you aren't taking the vics for any other reasons than pain?  My habit started from pain, but quickly became just plain addiction...there's tolerance and then there's addiction.  Figuring out what's what is the first step.  It's a hard thing to admit to yourself let alone anyone else.

[mrmichael67]

One person who is a legitimate pain patient not abusing their meds?  I guess you don't read close enough.  The vast majority are abusers, yes.  But, there are more than one.

[hellbent]

I began with 50mgs done daily. I was taking 500mgs Oxy daily at this point, and while it seems like I might have needed more done' to match my Oxy done, I felt fine. I blew it maybe 5 times in the 21 days, and took a few OC 40's. I didn't really start feeling bad until I got to 10mgs a day. By 5mgs a day, I wasn't feeling very good.

I am slightly aghast that you are on a 60 day program for your habit. I think it might be dangerous to stay on done' for 60 days. 21 day is a standard detox period. I don't know how long it takes until the stuff gets into your bone marrow (and it does), but 60 days is awhile.

I went down 2-1/2 mgs a day on my detox. I wanted out after 21 days, as I learned how bad done' addiction can be (I learned that it is much harder to get off of done' than oxy, once you have been on done' for awhile.). I had no interest in getting addicted to methadone. The point was to exchange, for a short time, one substance with the other, without developing a full blown horror addiction to the one. What is the point if you are just getting addicted to a substance that is harder to kick than the one you were already on?

I was willing to take some pain, and this is crucial. If you are looking for a free ride out, your expectations are going to put you into methadone maintenance. Keep letting us know how it's going.

[hellbent]

Excuse me, but was I even ******* talking to you?

I said that "I HAVE SEEN ONE PERSON...."

Please note the "I HAVE SEEN maybe one person" in that sentence. This is MY EXPERIENCE *******.

The whole point being that 1 Day not feel he/she is in the wrong place. Before you jump down someones throat at least have a goddamn point. Sheesh.

[groovygirl]

Why do you attack people like that?  Can't you have a conversation without calling people names? People here disagree all the time, but not many do so with as much hostility as you.  

[hellbent]

And if you've been here awhile you know that this is the second time in the probably 200 posts I've made where I have ever responded with hostility. However, in this case (the case being a completely pointless and dare I say borderline insulting post by mrmicheal), I felt it was warranted, even necessary. I have also held my tongue as he has dispensed suspect medical advice regarding methadone all over this board (the others who stood up to it were driven off the board by his "supporters"), and that pissed me off too. Perhaps I took his completely unnecessary post as an opportunity to hit back a little harder than I needed to. Sorry if I upset anybody, and I'll try to ignore the flamewar that is sure to follow.

[diso]

Thanks for the second reply.  They started me out with 30mg.  I actually felt pretty sick after taking it "woozy" in the head and a little sick to my stomach.  They said it might wear off before I make it in tomorrow but it sounds like if 50mg a day was fine for your 500mg a day habit then 30 should definitely hold me over (if not be too much).  I'm afraid that I am looking a little bit too hard for a painless ride.  I think I will take your advice and work towards a 30 day detox at minimum.  Do you know how long it takes to get into your bone marrow?  I have read that the withdrawal symptonms from methadone can last weeks not the standard 5-7 days for oxys.  Definitely don't want that.  I really wish I could find someplace that would allow me to give Buprenorphine a go.  I don't know who to even call.

Your post reconfirms my fears about methadone.  I DO NOT want to get addicted to it.  I just want off the OCs.  Thanks again for the input.

[hellbent]

Hey. I would definitely reccomend coming down in 30 days, or less. Find out if your clinc or wherever can furnish you with some clonodine patches for when you stop. They will lower your blood pressure and help keep anxiety at bay for the first 1-2 weeks. My clinic also gave me 50 trazadones, which are an old-school anti-depressant but help with insomina. I was supposed to take one a day, but took them all in 5 days :( It did help with no sleep.

Finally, some benzos could help, as long as you aren't already taking them, and you only stay on them for 2 weeks or so. 20mgs of valium every night can make the ride easier after you finish with the done'. For now, work on getting through the done' as quickly as you can.

Also make sure to schedule some time off life when you get off the done' Take 2 weeks off of everything if at all possible. This is your life on the line. Short term resposibilities don't mean squat. Get clean no matter what.

[GOD]

As you can see, nobody has deleted your posts, and MOST of the people here are helpful, and are eager to share their experiences with you. Many would also like YOUR advise when you are ready to give it! Anyway, you described your usage of Vicodin at the level of 10-15 pills per day. That level is about average on this forum... There are many here who take WAY MORE than that, and some who take much less. As Mariposa mentioned in her post to you, Oxy Contin is not necessarily a "Bad" drug. It comes in many different strengths, and is a VERY EFFECTIVE pain-releiver... (IF TAKEN AS DIRECTED) As long as you aren't crushing and/or snorting it or shooting it up your veins, you wjould barely even get "High" while on it. The WHOLE point of this drug's introduction was to stop people from taking 10-20 vicodins per day for pain, when all they were doing was destroying their liver. The problem with Opiates is that to give a patient the same level of pain relief over an extended period, the dosage MUST, unfortunately, be evelvated from time to time. If 15-20 Vicodins "Lets you function" (and that is not a high dose considering the fact that you have been on this medication for 3 years, right?) - in other words, your pain is under control, and you are not "High," Wouldn't you prefer to just take 2 pills per day? One at 8 am, and one at 8pm?
That's what you would be prescribed if you were on Oxy Contin. 1 40Mg in the morning, and one at night. And the benefit would be that you would be giving your liver a rest. The level of Acetamenaphen you're taking in your vicodins is doing almost equivalent damage to your liver as if you had a bad drinking problem.

It is nothing to be ashamed of if you do have a need for an effective medicine for pain control. If it helps you function, that is the WHOLE point of taking a medication. You will remain active and productive in society, not to mention "Better" to be around as you wont be in constant pain! Your attitude will be better...

Anyhow, I hope you consider what Mariposa and I have said in this string!

Hoping ALL have a decent, pain-free night-
~~~~Jess~~~~

P.S. I've had many inquiries regarding my new "Handle" here (Jesse@Medhelp). I would like to note that: NO, I am not on the Medhelp staff. I'm sorry if it has caused any confusion. I changed my JesseSarpy account to the new one because of all the "Fun" around the board lately.

[mrmichael67]

Are you bringing up this Cleanman **** again?  He attacked me out of no where.  I also know quite a bit about methadone.  A lot of people who post here about it have never taken it.  Some have.  If someone doesn't know about it, they shouldn't comment on it.  It serves no useful purpose.  I made a very true statement about you not reading close enough because if you did, you would know there are more than one person.  And you saying there was only one was insulting in itself.  Maybe you should take the "hell" out of your handle because that is all you seem to be.....bent.  This isn't the first time you have flown off the handle at someone and I am sure it won't be the last.  Tough guy!  Wow, it takes some serious balls to talk to someone like that over the internet.

[mrmichael67]

Benzo's and trazadone at the same time for the same thing?  Good advice.

[mrmichael67]

Notice you said "borderline".  It wasn't an attack.  But, the next post from you sure left nothing to the imagination.

[mrmichael67]

The people who left?  Who, Cleanman and Aussiebabe?  The TWO and ONLY TWO people that jumped on me then?  If that is the way you felt, you should have spoken your peace.  I am sure anyone who is familiar with what happened then could agree that they weren't exactly tactful.  And, that is being very kind.  You have no idea of what I do and I have no more time for your insignifigance.

[puma]

First to address finished,

Hello, and welcome to this sometimes steamy forum. As you see it doesn't only take a hacker to set the stage for frustration to explode.

I really don't know if your posts were deleted, but I notice whenever I sign on I don't see my posts unless I open the column I responded in previously, then everything is there. I think the data is compressed because of all the usage. I don't know if you tried going into the columns and still were not listed there.

Second, the forum was deleting some people because of the hacking and unfortunately the way threads are set up, innocent posters also were deleted. I have seen your posts before however.

I don't know much about your type of addiction, that is why I observed but remained quiet. I will give any support you need however, I don't think anyone should be left out (swinging in the wind) so to speak. After the onslaught of rage on this threa, I forgot what you asked. I no nothing about Methadone, but alot about alcohol and benzos. Oh, I forgot, Codiene and Ultram as well. How soon we try to forget.LOL

Never mind the arguements, you need to take what is helpful and supportive to your needs and leave the rest for others to read. I hope this helped in some way. I am sorry I don't have a solution to your addiction. I'll read it again and see what I can think of.

The best person to ask would be Hippee, Skipper, and Thomas2 for experience with the hard core opiates and detox. They have more experience under their wings than I do. Please except this as a welcome and keep posting. If your name is deleted again, try droping the question mark, perhaps that confuses the computer, who knows?

Take care a good luck,

Chatahan


P.S.- There must be something in the planetary phase today or something. I woke in a terrible mood and I see a few others woke up that way as well. All in good fun I hope, let's not take things so personally and seriously please. We are all in the same boat or we would not waste our time here. Love to all.

[groovygirl]

Looks like you let him get to you...you shouldn't.  He cannot have an argument without being crude and insulting, so why bother?

[OxyDout]

just wanted to say that aussiebabe and whoever were definitely to say the least "not tactful" they were actually kind of disturbing.

[hellbent]

No more time for my insignificance? Oh Mrmichael, I'm gonna be shedding tears for days after that one. That just hurts me all to hell.

Quit popping off at people for no reason, and you might get along a little better. Sorry Pal, not everyone will sit idly by as you vent your anger at yourself on them. As far as your advice on methadone being very poor and generally sucking, there were more than 2 people who were on you for it, but it doesn't really matter now. As far as me being a "tough guy" on the internet, what the ****? Don't know where you got the idea that I was trying to be manly or tough or whatever, as I never said anything to that effect. Perhaps hiding behind a keyboard and talking tough is something YOU have a problem with...yes? And perhaps you are projecting **** onto someone else yet again?

I will say that I would have no problem at all walking directly up to you and saying anything I would say here, while looking you straight in the eye. Can you say the same there bud?

[OxyDout]

Speaking for myself only, I have had great success with Methadone, I never used it for longer then 5 days, but non the less, I had incredible results, the first couple of times I slipped after the methadone detox but only because I couldn't hack it mentally. Methadone allowed me to detox pain free, there were no withdrawal symptoms..... good luck.

gwh

[hellbent]

done' helped me immensely as well, for a 21 day detox. Without it, I would have been flopping around like a fish going cold turkey from a ton of Oxycontin. However, people who take less than maybe 100mgs of oxy or hydro should really think twice, in my opinion, about using it, and people who are taking less than 60mgs should not even consider it, unless it's for just a few days.

[OxyDout]

I agree, I was taking about 200mg of oxycontin a day, I only used Methadone for 5 days........ I used 2 40mg wafers, that was all I needed since I wasn't taking in as much oxy as you were, I believe you said you were up to 800mg a day, is that right?

[hellbent]

Yea, 800mgs and 10-15mgs klonopin a day. Christ I am glad those days are (for today) behind me. Thanks for asking.

[earlygrayce]

you've been on this board a while and the source of much inspiration for a guy like me, even though your addiction was much more severe than mine. so i must thank you for that.

but being on that much oxy and klonopin at the same time(i assume that was through a 12 - 15 hr. day), how did you stay awake. was it just tolerance? i remember taking 6 vikes and a klonopin and barely being able to kepp my eyes open. i would think pure oxy + the benzo would sedate you much more than that small amount of hydro and the benzo.

just curious. like i said, your recovery is an inspiration.
stay well.

[hellbent]

My addiction started with 4 vikes a day. I moved to percs when I found a reliable connect. Then I found Oxycontin. I remember when 1 40mg OC would last me a whole day. Several years later I had to eat 2-3 80's when I woke up in the morning just to feel halfway alive...

I started the klonopins in anticipation of my big "taper". Problem was, I failed over and over again trying to taper off, but like a fool kept purchasing klonopins and eating them. When I finally quit OC's, my benzo habit was pretty serious.

I used to nod off alot. My nice down comforter is swiss chesse from cigarette burns. I also used to wake up with vomit going into my lungs. This happened quite a few times. Life was terrible in many ways, but the sickest thing is that my mind still tells me that I was having fun back then sometimes.

Anyway, I'm as amazed as anyone else that I somehow lived through it. There has to be a god, and grace, cuz I couldn't do that on my own. Thanks for letting me reflect a little. It helps.