whitie..... Gotta say I love how u put things into perspective.... It is so true and to consider the circumstances it is ONE HUGE AZZ GORILLA!!!!!
I plan to lean on all and show my pride in the end..... I am a proud man and even more proud that I have prevailed addiction in many ways in my life.... You see, I was a speed addict for many years and overcame that.... Then, it was my weight (which was the whole reason I used speed to begin with)..... And I have prevailed that!!!!! It's all in how we decide we want to live or want to die!!!!! I know that most everyone is going to understand that using a few valium and some flexeril is ok, but I still know that the valium is an opiate and trading on pile of dung for another isn't going to fix it!!!!! I have a great support in these forums already and I also have great support around me to keep me accountable... Ultimately, i am going to be accountable for myself but will lean on all that I can to get there....
You guys that have been there and stay with the forum to help others out are the GREATEST!!!! I know it your way to help tame the dragoon and it really works and gives you such a sense of where you were at and where you don't ever want to go again....
Yeah Bro, I read a lot about TJ and did it as right as I thought I could by going to a Doc down there and then going to only the most reputable Rx down there..... NEVER, NEVER AGAIN THOUGH!!!!! This made me feel like the days I was transporting speed from one house to another.... Everyone was watching me and knew exactly what I was doing..... Even though I know it's not that way, you still ridicule yourself in that manner.... Man, I thought I left that **** long behind..... It really made me feel sick about the whole situation....
I WILL PREVAIL THIS BEAST AND YOU CAN COUNT ON THAT!!!!!
Thanks again and I really am enjoying all of you sharing your thoughts.... It just lifts my head a little higher and makes me feel like I got someone to talk to during all this.....
YOU GUYS ARE A GODSEND WHETHER YOU HAVE BEEN HERE FOR ONE POST OR 5,000.... IT TAKES A LOT OF COURAGE TO SHARE YOUR STRUGGLES WITH THE REST OF THE WORLD.....
THANKS SO MUCH!!!!! I AM TRULY GRATEFUL!!!!!
You can lean on me anytime you need to bro, I know what its like and I do promise things will get back to normal. but it takes TOTAL dedication and time.its alright in my book to use a few valium or flexerils to help you get through the first few days. but thats it, because valium is very addicting too,flexeril is not. thats why its the first thing they prescribe to people.
watch out what you get in TJ......... not trying to scare you, but many tv episodes on the half arsed junk that comes out of there.
you got the right attitude, so far. If you want your normal life back its only going to happen if you study your enemy well and prepare yourself for a war, and wars are not won in a few days. be ready and fight for your life. that 800 pound gorrilla on your back is a coniving crafty SOB.......he will play mind games with you. let him know you already know whats comming and dont give a rats @zz what he tries to do to your mind.
you can win this.
and on a side note, I have used this forum as my support group, like you I work alot and droping $5000-10,000 on rehab was not an option. but now I am saving alot of money compared to what I spent on the pills. there is also a certain sense of pride, in doing it yourself. I now know that I am stronger than that gorrilla, but hes off some where wondering what happened after getting his @ZZ kicked. so far. ah, that does feel good especially when he bested me all these years.
hi, i sure hope someone comes on here and talks to you about those patches. i don't have any experience with them but i do have a HUGE problem with vics. you sound so prepared and mentally ready for this hard process. i am a firm believer that our minds are more powerful than anything, with a good attitude this can be beat. i think you just need to get at that point in your life when you say enough is enough and i can tell you are there (as i am too)
best of luck to you, stay with the site you will get some good advice getting off fentanyl.
Hey Whitie,
Thanks for your comments as all encouragement is much appreciated! I am NOT taking anything that has not been prescribed to me at this point.... I did go to TJ to get some valium and flexeril to try and combat the w/d's.... This is the first and only time I ever plan to do that!!!! I was so scared coming back across the border with them that I wonder if it was worth it.... Just don't know where to turn as if you re-read my post I am having problems with my doctor's even contacting me.... I have not been abusing the prescriptions but will have to say I am an addict as I sometimes (here recently) have been looking for that euphoric high from them.... My plan is to not prolong this any longer than this weekend as I am just trying to gather as much info as I can to make this as easy of a transition as possible.... Just don't want to go into this unprepared and fall as I feel I already did.... I know it was based upon the Dr.'s suggestion but anyone can make it if they choose.... This is why I feel I failed..... I am really preparing myself and looking forward to having my life back!!!!! I have dealt with addictions in many sorts in my life and have prevailed on all of them.... It's just mind over matter.... HOW MUCH DO YOU DESIRE BEING CLEAN!!!! For me it's EVERYTHING!!!!! This is why I am getting very much involved in the forums so I can discuss and lean on ALL OF YOU!!!!
Thanks again so much for your words of wisdom as experience is everything!!!!!
you can do it,if you really want it bad enough the patches are strong stuff, though. many horror stories on those....... the longer you are on an opiate and or opioids, the harsher the Wd's will be. so I would suggest you quit now, before you wind up even worse. best to prepare yourself with the facts, that way the mental end of it will make sense.
I am about 70 days clean from a methadone/norco addiction,with methadone being hardest wd I have ever experienced. plus I had to work like you are going to have to. if you could get a weeks vacation, that would be suggested. if not,tell you are sick as a dog or you got food poisoning.......what ever. the first week is going to be hell, the second not as bad,third things are some what back to normal. I think I came up with ten wd symptoms, that occur.some take it better than others.........it explains why people relapse,because it sux bad and takes a long time to get back to normal.
the dealer with the benz,that is selling the fent pathces,is sooner or later going to kill someone with those or get popped,then they will be in club fed,and not the benzo!! you might want to stay FAR AWAY from them......
Thanks so much!!!! This is going to be my lifeline as you would say.... Got a lot of support around me and I am really trying to plan this out.... Having a plan of attack is the only way to make it!!!! If you just go by the seat of your pants there is a good chance you are going to fail..... Not saying that others haven't been able to do it that way as everyone has there own way of hitting bottom and refusing to be a slave to the MONSTER anymore, but I know myself well enough that I need to really plan this out.... I am the type of person that it's all or nothing!!!!! Thanks again and I will post everyday..... Just went to the 12mcg patch and am looking forward to NEVER seeing one of these things in my life again!!!!!
EVERYONES SUPPORT AND SEEING THE SUCCESS STORIES IS JUST THE MEDICINE I NEED!!!!!
Im just showing some support. You seem to have a positive frame of mind. Stay determined and you will make it through. You know what to expect so just take it head on and you will win. It just take time and strength. Hopefully your doctor will call back and you can discuss some meds that will help a little. Clonidine is supposed to be helpful with the skin crawling, etc. Other than that the Thomas Recipe is good. And support. You know your going to feel like he11. But you should ALSO remember that it wont kill you and it wont last forever. Stay on the forum. Keep posting and sharing. Sometimes it helps just to know people who are, or who have, gone through the same. Best of luck to you and God bless.