Xanax WD. Day 11-4 plus Lortab reduction.

[Soonerdean]

What a roller coaster.  Today is day 14 for me and I've been all over the place with these symptoms.  This past Friday was day 11 and I felt pretty good and thought the worst was behind me.  Saturady (day 12) was horrible.  I woke up with an anxiety level I've never experienced, pain all over my body, foggy brain and pounding heart and did not sleep much that night.  Sunday, (day 13) I woke up and once again felt pretty good all day.  Last night around 6pm a little anxiety did return, started running a fever and then some depression set in but for the most part all of it was tollerable.  

Today is day 14.  I did not sleep at all last night, body aches have returned, crazy anxiety with depression at the same time, very irritable so I'm staying away from people as much as I can, constipation, cold/numb hands & feet and a slight but irritating headache.  I've read several articles stating the worst days are typically days 5-10 then the symptoms will tend to subside gradually.  I just find it amazing the ups & downs of this process and how this little white pill has come close to wrecking my entire life.

To make matters worse..I'm also on a extreme Lortab taper/reduction program.  I've been taking five 10/500 Lortabs a day for the past 6 years for a pinched nerve in my back.  Last Thursday I woke up and said ENOUGH!  I cant continue taking these type meds.  I've reduced my daily intake by 5mgs a day hoping this would not cause me too much agony on top of what i was already enduring...so far so good.  I have 40 tabs left until my next script is due to be filled so Im hoping I'll make it.  I just decide that I want my life back so I grabbed onto sobriety and am holding on for dear life.   This has been the most difficult thing I've ever done but I keep reading posts of people who made it do 21 days and they say they feel wonderful.  That is my inspiration and what is diving me to get clean.  I've never abused my pills, never called in for an early refill and my pain is legit.  I'm tired of pill counting and depending on these little white devils for daily survival.  So far I've been able to face these demons and am fighting as hard as I can.

I get these waves of self-loathing where i become so mad at myself for not being physically and mentally tougher.  I loved how these meds make me feel.  Anytime things became stressful I INSTANTLY went for the pill bottle and for a few hours they took the stress away.  I just cant believe I did that and now I'm paying the price.  Thanks for listening to me ramble.  It does help to be able to log in and just write things down and know that there are others just like me fighting the same battle.

I'm fighting this all alone as I've tried talking to my wife about this but whenever I do she instantly changes the topic.  I'm just scared to death that she has lost all respect for me.  Wish me luck.  I'm gonna keep giving this demon the finger and keep fighting for my life.    

[Soonerdean]

Thanks for the kind words.  

I took 1mg Xanax XR nightly for a little less than a month.  About the middle of week 2 I began to notice some serious changes in me like bouts of bad depression that came out of the blue and lasted several hours.  I called the doc and she said not to worry and suggested I increase to 1.5mgs nightly but I just did not feel comfortable with that.  About the middle of week 4 I was a mess so.  Could not get out of bed, severe brain fog, no energy, urination problems, gained 15lbs and extreme depression.  I knew xanax was the reason so I quit cold turkey not knowing exactly how potent this particular med was.  Other than Ativan that was given to me while in the hospital...I've never taken a benzo on a regular basis like this...I sure wish I had researched this med before ever taking that first tab.  

Quitting xanax cold turkey certainly was the wrong thing to do but now I'm so far into detox I'm just not willing to go back and undo all this hard work.  And yes...adding in a narcotic withdrawal has been nothing short of "HELL" but I had a decision to make.  

Over the past 10 days I've learned a lot about GABA, how xanax changes the chemistry in your mind and how difficult xanax is to come off of.  I wish I had done this research prior to taking that first pill.  Anyway....tomorrow is another day and I know I still have some work to do but I'm committed to this.  

I'm just SHOCKED at how a small does of xanax can do so much damage is such a short amount of time.  I've felt bad for so long that I'm actually getting used to it.  

Still givin it the finger!

[donewitis]

Well, all i can say is I do now how you feel. I'm now at 44 days clean from oxycodone..and I did a short taper with them..tomorrow I have an appt to see Dr about tapering the xanax. Because of the dual dependance and maybe my health problems have drawn out the w/d process for me..I don't know for sure but anxiety is still a major factor, so just want you to know that many of us understand.
I don't know if you tapered and if so, how long a taper on the xanax? I was informed that though wth opiates there is no need for tapering that with xanax there is a possibility for seizures. I hope and pray that you will be feeling better real soon. My story is somewhat similiar..in the sense that I did get meds for legit reasons initially and then became dependant and stayed within the script, not looking for it elsewhere. I say this humbly, only but for the Grace of God.
Keep us posted, ok?
btw: Good for you, taking control of your life...as i've heard said here before "This is a marathon not a 100 yard dash."..or something to that effect. Your wife, I imagine is scared for you, for your marriage, and doesn't know how to cope, what to do. How could anyone if they have never experienced it, right?  I could never have understood unless I'd been there. That's why this forum is so helpful. Everyone has been there in some way or other. Maybe if you showed your message (this forum) to your wife and the responses?, she may very well want to become more knowledgable and then maybe be a supportive spouse. I believe that would make this fight for your life a little easier. Just a thought.

[gnarly_1]

hi welcome to the forum .....I dont know your whole story but I hope you tapered the xanex and that stuff s u c k s going off ....I came off 4mg over about a yr taper and it still was ruff if you just go off your gaba receptors are going to go nutz for a wile you could be in for symptoms for over a month .....I know you want off eveything but I would wait till your done with 1 b/4 you start the other your going to have your brain chemesty a mess here what ever you decide we will support you im just trying to give you sound advise benzo are a bi t ch to kick now your throwing nacotic withdrawals in to....your a brave soul
good luck and God bless......Gnarly