beachtowel

[dfr3]

wow 18 months, you sound wise way beyond your sobriety!  i know when i had 5 years really clean and sober no drugs and i did that 4th step i really thought i would never drink again, and since drugs were not my choice of drug i never thought i would get hooked on them.  i had dabbled but always went back to my drug of choice alcohol.  but as i found out the addiction will find any way it can to get in the door.  going thru w/ds i thought wow a drink might help, i called my sponser she said pray. it worked,i didn,t take a drink but wow the thought was so strong.  i know people in the program who talk a good game but i know them outside the program and they surely do not preach what they speak!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i was one of them spitting sobriety when i was popping pills.  but i love that saying TO THY OWN SELF BE TRUE!  i am a great liar and manipulator and i know i must change me in order to stay on the right path.  thank-you for being so active and i like the softer side of you!

take care and thanx for sharing
lol
jill  

[beachtowel]

Hi Jill,

Your the fourth person who commented on my softer side.....I guess I should by some posh puffs I am turning into a sissy...........

I too was a great liar and manipulater just as many addicts are it is the nature of the beast........

I got into recovery really strong and not by my own choice a judge Mayberry was the person who really kicked my in the ass.........

Its funny how things turn out I am hoping to be admitted into U of D Mercy with a major in addiciton studies....

I want my CAC and CAC1

I enjoy speaking very much maybe I can counsel someone young and get through so that they won't stay in and out of addiction for years and decades...

Thank you for your kind words.......

[fishmeal]

Dfr that was really well written.  You touched my heart.  Yes our disease is doing push-ups just waiting for us to come back.  It's funny, (or not so funny), how this disease progresses whether we drink or not.  Maybe it’s just because we’re getting older and can’t handle it as well…. I just don’t know.  People have said that heroin addicts that come off the wagon, have a high propensity to overdose because there tolerance is back lower and when they get a little the addiction takes over.

Also, You really brought into perspective the saying, “To Thy own self be true.”  So true.  When I first started AA a million years ago, I was so shocked to see that these people had faults!! That a few of them were down right dishonest and would steal your car. Heehee ~~~ The same goes with Christians we all fall short.  How many times have I lied to myself thinking, “this will be the last one.”  Nice Post Dfr .... got me thinking.