beer vs. liquor

[nd]

I am a beer drinker. I drink light beer only, and I usually drink about 1 case of beer on the weekends. I am currently trying to limit that to 12 beers every other weekend. My question is; what are the harmful side effects of light beer compared to hard liquor or even regular beer?

[mimijo61]

For the last year I have been on meds for depression and anxiety.  I've started drinking pretty heavy.  Only beer but like you all say alcohol is alcohol.  The thing is I didn't drink when my children were young and my brother passed away 2 years ago of colon cancer.  It was very hard watching him go.  My biggest problem is that my husband consantly harps at me about my drinking even though I have done very well the last 2 weeks.  However, he took a huge cup with Mt. Dew and hard liquor on a trip and packed beer "for me".  I didn't ask for it.  Last night he said lets for a drive and packed beer again.  Then later that night he asks me what drives me to drink the way I do.  I kind of feel like he is setting me up to fail.  He said I should go talk to someone but I don't think he realizes that if and when I do that our marriage of 27 years will probably be over.  He find fault with most things I do around the house from cleaning to cooking.  He has a huge "beer belly".  He talks about my "drinking problem in front of me around our friends"  I even heard one of them say that my husband was an enabler but it went right over his head because he can't possible be the reason.  He partied and I do mean partied most of our marriage while I stayed sober and responsible.  I just don't know what to do here.  I know I need help but I feel like I'm getting blocked.  He even says I'm on "nut pills"  Is that being supportive?  
I would appreciate any thoughts.

[J.B. to Brian and Vicky]

I've been hearing about this Dr. Gooberman for several months and always thought that it was just a matter of time before he got put out of business.  Quite a few of us here just didn't like the sound of his methods.  Too bad seven people had to die to make a point!  He supposedly made the statement that these people would probably have died anyway as a result of their addiction. What a pompous ass!  J.B.

[Gina]

Thanks to you too. It means so much for people to stand by you. I read an article (I put Methadone in Search box and then clicked on the TexNAMA site)about Dr. Lance Gooberman. It stated that prosecutors began their malpractice case against the south jersey addiction treatment specialist whose unorthodox cold-turkey method of treating opiate addiction cost the lives of at least 7 patients according to the states complaint. He works with Dr. Bradway and they stand to lose their medical licenses if an adminisrative judge finds against them in a trial expected to last until Feb 28. The article is too long to type but that's why I told you how to find it. I guess my girlfriend was right on the money. They have been discharging their patients without providing for adequate after-care. INTERESTING READING!!!

[Gina]

Thank you so much for your kind response. Imagine me being an inspiration...I wrote the book on the way NOT to handle things. What I jusy read from you was a "high" in itself.

[J.B. to Brian and Vicky]

It's tough some times when we get blasted by our loved ones, and maybe we do deserve it.  I do believe it does come out of love though.  I'd probably end up blaming them for being indifferent or more enabling eventually.  Anyway, situations like this surely do get our attention and we can manage to benefit from the experience.  Or we can get pissed and take it all out on ourselves and get loaded again.  Thank God we have the choice not to do this sh*t anymore!  J.B.

[tom to Tara (and that J.B fella)]

I second J.B.'s advice. He is more qualified than most to give it. ALANON was founded specifically for people in your situation, particularly where alcoholism, genetic predisposition and family dynamics and co-dependencies come into play. I'm sure you've investigated court-issued restraining orders and despaired of their relative futility.

I have a 36-year old step-son who drinks and acts like your brother, and we have not been able to do much more than bar him from our property, place a block on our phone and threaten to call the police if he shows his face. To him, his family is simply a cluster of victims he periodically intimidates into giving him "get lost money."

Our "Family vacations" necessarily coincide with his jail terms, the longer, being, of course, the better. I wish I could tell you it gets better from here.

Myself, I am addicted to narcotics - prescription pain killers and the like. The violence I have inflicted upon my family has come in the form of emotional neglect caused by the self-absorption of my addiction, together with the financial hardship of paying my many doctor, rehab, urgent care and pharmacy bills through the years.

I cannot imagine what or where I'd be if I could just climb into my car at any hour of the day or the night and drop into the local 7-11 and order a bottle of Percodan or Demerol tablets as easily as a six-pack of beer! The only lucky break I've gotten in the thirty years of my drug addiction is that, for whatever reason, I simply get no satisfaction from alcohol, physically or psychologically. I have never understood why, but I thank the good lord for dealing me that one life-saving card. Otherwise, I sincerely believe I would be, at best, a pile of ashes in some mausoleum urn somewhere in Southern California,  or some sorry family story surfacing only by accident when the wrong picture album got opened at one family gathering or another.

J.B.'s drawn the "straightest line between two points" for you on this one. It's hell to live in fear of one of your own. But you're not alone. AlANON will help. Give them a call.

Here's a link you can click on right now, Tara, for their web site. It's a place to start anyway. Don't forget us if you need someone to talk to. J.B.'s the best and the wisest you'll find on this forum and you can count on him seeing your post the same day you leave it. Take care. Don't let anyone lay a hand in anger on you, family or not.

http://www.al-anon.alateen.org/

[Gina]

It's funny how you mentioned that you weren't going to get loaded over a situation. Two days ago I went to my dr. (who knows nothing about my addiction and has given me scripts for narcs in the past). I went there to get NON-NArcs for my back pain that comes and goes. While in the office waiting for him, I heard the nurse whispering to another nurse and then to the dr. I had a feeling it was about me. They left my chart on the desk beside me so I opened it. Sure enough, there was a note to the dr FYI Patients husband called and said pt. has trouble with pain meds please do not give her any. Husband doesn't want wife to know he called. Dated 1-3-01. I was so furious, hurt and embarassed that I was shaking so bad. I took the note out since they were dumb enough to leave it by me. The dr. comes in and lokks down his nose at me. He checked my heart? made me bend over to check my back and said take tylenol. At this point I didn't want a f%$#&** thing from him. But I said and if the pain gets worse? He said Advil. I said thank you very much and have a nice day. I come home and my stepson had a csrd from his mom in the mail. He opened it aand left it on the table. (She is very evil and nasty so there hasn't been any good communucation bwtween us ever). She signed the valentine card with Love, Mom (your one and only drug-free). I thought I was going to lose my mind. I wanted to use so bad...but made up my mind that I would prove everyone wrong and stick to my program After I settled down, I realized my husband did this out of love for me..He has never done anything like this in the last few years we have been dealing with this. So I am a better person today because I think I am a little bit stronger. I will not be returning to that dr. I f it had come from me Iam sure he would have respected me, but now he looks down at me. Just wanted to share.....

[J.B. to tom]

Thanks, Tom, your post just gave me a big boost to keep going for another day!  This morning I had a confrontation with one of my own family who said that I was a loser.  But you have to remember that people who point fingers at you have three pointing back at them, right?  Well, I'm not going to go out and get loaded over it the way I used to in the past. J.B.

[Vicodin Gurrl to Dan]

Amen to Gina!!!!!...Your story above was extremely touching, and even though you dont know me, I wanted you to know that I find you to be so incredibly strong and brave.  What a tough growing experience/lesson you got through without using anything but your HEAD (and heart as well).  Im giving you a standing ovation...Keep up the HARD work...you can do this!!!!  You are my inspiration...

[J.B. to Tara]

That's a good question. All I can say is that it gets worse the longer it is allowed to progress.  Twenty years ago I was wondering if my life could possibly be any worse due to drinking!  Obviously it has gotten much worse over the years.  I watched my own father's decline for years and felt that I could not possibly get down that far.  Ironically, I eventually did!  I became the person that I despised the most in my life.

I know that you are hurting and confused right now.  There is no easy way to deal with your brother.  What I would do is contact ALANON and talk to several people about this problem.  Believe me, they definately have the experience and solutions that will allow you to cope with your father, brother and mother.  If nothing else, you will gain some self esteem in knowing that you at least tried to make your life better.  J.B.

[Tara to anyone and JB]

Hello

My father is an alchoholic, luckily my mother removed us from that situation as soon as he became violent.  Now my little brother, he is 20 years old, is going through the same things. He is an extremely violent alchoholic.  Only I found out today that he is going to have another baby.  The last one had major problems and is finally healthy but my brother and this girl keep drinking/smoking.  The last time I saw my brother was when he got released from jail on charges of assault w/a deadly weapon.  I took him home and he stole from me (like many times before), and punched holes in my walls.

My question is, my father has been drinking heavily, mostly beer for over 20 years and has gotten quite a bit of brain damage and can barely walk.  My brother has been drinking heavily for 4 years and drinks hard liquor.  How long is it before he is in my fathers state.  Also, if he is this bad now, what can we expect from him later?  He is so unpredictable that I am so afraid of him, I call the police everytime he contacts me but my mother would really like to find a way to get over her fears of him.

Tara

p.s. Hi JB, just wondering how your feeling, almost another week clean, congrats!

[Barbara]

It does not matter what sort of alcohol you drink, even mouth wash has alcohol and is abused by some alcoholics.

You appear to have the signs of alcoholism and should consider getting detox treatment for it. It is up to you to admit that you have an alcohol problem. We cen not do that for you. It is your choice, you must take resposibility for yous own actions and decisions.

[Dee]

My dad died in 1979 from cancer of the stomach lining, needless to say, it was a very painful way to go, but, fast, 6 months from dignosis to death, he was an alkie,big time, his choice of drink was Seagrams 7 straight up,he worked for the post office, back then working for the PO was considered a big step up, he would come home so drunk that when he opened the car door he would fall out..cops used to bring him home,I know that the whiskey is what gave him cancer, but back then the doctors didn't really connect it as they do now...as JB says alcohol is alcohol in any form..the damage it causes is horrendence,
JB, my prayers are with you...

[tom to J.B.]

my good friend, in my depression of late I've neglected to congatulate you on your decision to go opiate free. May a warm wind be at your back and carry you where you want to go.

My god, J.B., I didn't know you were waiting for a liver transplant. God, how could I have missed this fact in our many posts?

Please accept our prayers for you're recovery, J.B. Take are and give my best to Marty.

[J.B. to Brian and Vicky]

I've talked about my liver problems from time to time but maybe I should have been more vocal about them.  Yes, opiates were always my drug of choice but I filled the void with alcohol for years.  After all it is legal, cheap and for the most part socially acceptable.  In my opinion it is also the most destructive of all drugs in our society.  Then let's add nicotine to the equation and it gets much worse.

For me, healthwise, alcohol has been by far more destructive to my body than anything else that I've used.  And that is more fact than personal opinion as far as I'm concerned.  Prayers are desperately welcome for those of us that have the "dual addiction".  Thanks, Tom, and please be well!  J.B.

[J.B. to Brian and Vicky]

Blood test results are difficult for most of us to interpret.  I tried to compare mine with yours and got confusing results which I don't know how to explain.  You would be much better off letting those professionals who are trained in this field advise you.  My own blood test readings can be so screwed up that my MD has to refer me to a hematologist at times.  

I feel that you need expert, hands on advice and treatment with your problems.  Please seek medical help as soon as possible.  That's probably the best advice anybody here can give you.  J.B.

[J.B. to Brian and Vicky]

There are so many that I'd have to type here all day!

Probably, long before you have any serious symptoms, blood tests will show abnormal liver and kidney functioning.

In my case the major symptoms are fatigue, joint pain, general weakness, mental confusion, vision problems, high blood pressure, gout, neuropathy, water retention in the lower extremities, impotence, depression, spider angiomas on the chest and neck, malnutrition, anemia, low platelett count and angina.
Is that enough for one person?  Plus I have hepatitis C which was either caused by using IV drugs, unprotected sex or a blood tranfusion while I was in the military during the Viet Nam era.

Three years ago I was given 18 months life expectancy but obviously I am still here.  Abstinance from alcohol has helped a great deal but came too late in my case.  Hope this helps you!  J.B.

[Frankinscense]

I am a sustance abuse abuse councelor and have completed many courses and seminars on the subject of drug and alcohol abuse, and JB has said just about all the facts in brief on alcohol and the liver. Anyone that is in question about alcoholism should have a thorough blood survey to determine how much damage has been done to the vital organs.(liver,pancreas,heart, red blood cells etc.) Not to mention the delicate balance of serotonin,dopamaine,and other neurotransmitters that have been disturbed due to drinking a  'solvent'. Alcohol is alcohol no matter what the vehicle or method of getting it into the brain. Good Luck! Dan..
                                                                  JB greetings! How are you doing my friend with your abstinence?
Do you know about methadone and liver functioning? I think you do. I think possibly that you might find some useful info about methadone and liver functioning under a website called Doctor Column 5. I found it while doing a general search using "methadone" as my keyword. My best to You my Friend. Dan..

[Shiny]

i had a blood test done. Here's what it showed, in the way of being abnormal. My WBC was 17.2 (normal is 4.8-10.8); MCH was 33.0 (normal is 27.0-31.0); platelet count was 422 (normal is 130-400); SEG-% WAS 80 (normal is 40-74); lymphocytes-% is 15 (normal is 19-48); urine specific gravity is 1.025 (normal is 1.016-1.022); urine ketones is 15 (neg. this had a * I don't know why); urine mucous threads is 2+ (none); and SGOT/AST is 14 (normal is 15-46). I had this blood test done when I went to the emergency room with stomach problems (I had a ulcer). I don't do much drinking except on Sat. nights also I take narcotics and over-the-counter Max Alerts. I don't have any problems going to the bathroom but sometimes my sides hurt where your kidneys are located. Maybe Dan would have some answers, isn't he a doctor? I am worried.

[Shiny]

What are the signs of liver or kidney disease?

[J.B. to Brian and Vicky]

Alcohol is alcohol in whatever form you chose to embibe.  I'm not bragging here or making light of your usage but when I was drinking normally, I would easily drink a case of beer per day and often drink it with Vodka shooters.  Now I am waiting for a liver transplant. Some days I think that death would be kinder to me than living with all of the problems of end stage liver disease.  If you even suspect that you are alcoholic, quit now!  One indicator for you:  Does anybody else in your family have problems with it?  My own family has a history of alcoholism.

Good Luck to you!