cocaine use

[Ishtar83]

I have used ( and still do ) cocaine on an almost daily basis for the last 3 years now. I work out daily, (6 days a week ), run 3k daily, run marathons once a year, am a vegetarian, take my vitamis daily and faithfuly, do colonix, yoga, kickboxing, the whole healthy active stuff. I would say that I use coke primarily to be lean and shredded. I don't smoke, I quit alcohol ( I was a big drinker, which I quit recently due to blackouts ). All this time with cocaine I never experience the 'high' everyone is raving about, even when I used it the first time. All it gives me is this ******-up heart-racing thud in my chest and a friggin' headache. Nothing more. No pleasure at all. But I do feel guilty when I miss a line after each meal, fearful of gaining weight if I do so. Will somebody explain my behaviour towards cocaine use, please? Not even my physician can give me a direct scientific and medical answer other than cocaine is bad for me. My personal trainer parroted my doc's advise, but noting concrete.

[mariposa99]

First thing that jumped out at me in your post was how the cocaine use was connected to body image issues. Eating disorders like, bulimia, anerexia, overeaters, overexercisers have a strong link to the drug they choose to use. It can numb the feelings, bad body image feelings and experiences in life that have brought you to a long stint with cocaine. My good friend has suffered eating disorders her whole life. Two years ago she stopped drinking, and sees her struggles with alcohol and eating disorders as all part of the same disease. Need to numb something...whatever it is. I don't want to make assumptions about you at, but take maybe take some time to think about coke and weight/body issues may go hand in hand for you.

My friend still goes to AA meetngs and opens up about all the drugs she used to accomplish that in the past, alcohol, starving, binging and purging. I know therapy helped her as well.She is in an awesome confident, sober modd today. It makes me so happy for her. That's down your road too.

[lovemypillhead]

wow--ur super lucky! what did the doctors at the hosital say?  

[john229]

I am 22 years old and last week I ended up in the emergency room after having a heart attack. Thank to my friend that drove me there fast I'm still alive. All the tests showed that it was due to cocaine. I was a chronic user the past year and I was doing cocaine almost every week 2-3 lines each time to stay up and study. I never thought it would be so dangerous cause I have always been strong and healthy and I'm only 22. All I wanna say is stay away from the drug, you never know when it will be your turn. It is not a matter of if but a matter of when. Do not underestimate cocaine.

[Givitup]

I am fairly new to this site but not to addiction.   I think I always wanted all the scientific explanations as to my condition hell, I wanted a blood test to prove it!  But then I got the answer plain and simple ... I'm an addict.  We can pick it apart but it's pretty simple. It sounds like you might be an alcoholic and instead of drinking are "using" cocaine.  I am a recovering Alcholic (7+ years) but do struggle with a small amount of pain medication daily (2).  Why don't I comletely quit, same reason, I'm an addict.  What kept me from Alcohol for 7+ years was AA.  They say putting down the drug or drink is just the beginning because they are just the symptom.  

[Ishtar83]

I am afraid enough already.

And humbled by the things I read people here in this Forum have endured, or currently struggling with. My shrink attributes my cocaine use to me being a control freak, narcissistic *******, insecurity, chasing the rush, etc...But none of these professionals ( docs, shrinks, personal trainers ) are able to tell me the truth about cocaine. Probably afraid to lose business with me. Better to fire them all. People here are in real pain, dealing with real -life ordeal and braving it all still.

Courage, Hope and Light to All.  
To:

[Ishtar83]

I am afraid enough already.
And humbled by the things I read people here in this Forum have endured, or currently struggling with. My shrink attributes my cocaine use to me being a control freak, narcissistic *******, insecurity, chasing the rush, etc...But none of these professionals ( docs, shrinks, personal trainers ) are able to tell me the truth about cocaine. Probably afraid to lose business with me. Better to fire them all. People here are in real pain, dealing with real -life ordeal and braving it all still.

Courage, Hope and Light to All.

[Shattered]

At Least you have a sense of humor!.. Don't mean to scare you but your heart can only take so much pounding.

[Ishtar83]

Cocaine- Badly Needed Warning Label

" Sure, cocaine has many reported health benefits, such as the ability to dance for hours, fleeting, chemically induced happiness and street cred, but have you considered the pitfalls? Research has found that cocaine may also induce shrinkage of bank account and other parts, Wall Street crashes, a grossly inflated ego, taste for 80s music and instant assholism. "

HK Magazine
Nov07 issue

[MICHAEL_777]

I appreciate the advice and have been doing just that for about 5 days now.  I am undergoing spinal decompression and have about 15 treatments left.  Hopefully, they work and I haven't spent a bucket of money for nothing.

[Ishtar83]

I read your profile, and this is an attempt on my part to return the favour: I read about your back problem, and I don't know if this can help - try a chiropractor. I did. Though the reason for my ( past ) backpain aint as terrible as yours, I almost feel brand new. Here in Hong Kong, the chiropractors are known to help even with slipped disc.

[Ishtar83]

****. Now am scared.

[MICHAEL_777]

Having a strong heart only prolongs the inevitable.  My cocaine use was during my most active part of my life.  I was in peak physicall condition as bull riding requires that.  The heart is a muscle and if overworked, it will give out.  The physical conditioning it's receiving from training is healthy, but the rapid pulsations you get when on coke are not.

I'm glad to hear you're quiting.  Use the extra money for diet supplements that you can take after you eat.  Those can take the place of the line.  Love and Strength to you!

[Shattered]

Eventually your heart will explode with the work outs and the coke usage..either that or your a definately a prime canidate for an aneurism..

[Ishtar83]

I cannot express how grateful I am for this answer - the first ever honest one I got. I will get off coke then. But one more question: am I not better off than most cocaine users as I have a stronger heart due to my above-average workout regime? I know that the average user is a club-fiend, couch potato, and/or alcoholic ego-maniac. Just asking. The heart-stopper thing sort of frightened me.

[MICHAEL_777]

Sounds to me like the endorphines your body is producing from working out is overriding the coke.  I'm no medical expert, but that would be my guess.  It's amazing how our body can create such a powerful substance on its own.  Try researching endorphine production and see if it matches the way you feel.

Get off the coke!  You don't need it and there are other healthier ways to supplement your dieting.  Coke is not the answer.  That heart racing feeling is going to end up being a heart stopper.  Trust me, I know from experience.