crack cocaine

[Missy]

Is there any type of drug than can help with the relapse of crack users, to decrease craving. We have tried N/A and i have went to Nar-Anon. He has relapsed 2x since summer....before that he was clean for 2 yrs.  He was a user for about 7 yrs before that. He claims that he craves alcohol first...after he drinks he craves the crack cocaine.....he presently goes to AA, which i am not to sure how much good that does....any suggestions???????

HELP ME PLEASE TO SAVE MY FAMILY!!

Missy

[Alyssa]

I was looking for some answers to "saving" my own family and I just need to ask you why don't you leave? I have been dealing with this for two years and I am depressed and can barely function in day to day life. I'm not the addict he is. I don't have to stay and hurt myself and my children. So why do we stay?

[Kathy/wildone]

Missy & Alyssa
Please go to a Alon meeting, you don't have to say anything, nor pay anything, just sit and listen if you choose, you both might find some answers there,.......Alyssa was right, it is not your problems, but to learn how to deal with them if you choose to stay or leave ( your hubbies), I will gurantee  these meeetings will help you, that is what they were base upon, finding ways to "help" ourselfs first, and then facing the reality of our journey in life has taken us, with the substance, and if anything, if you don't make a good choice now, how will you teach your children too?.....<please don't take that as being nasty, I have walked in the same shoes you have>
May happiness and peace of mind find you,
Kathy/wildone

[Ricky Crutchfield]

I am 39 I have a drug problem  I have been fighting this war for too long . I

[Gabriel]

KEEP FIGHTING THE FIGHT YOU WILL WIN.

[PW]

My husband has been smoking crack for about 7 years.  We have been together for about 2 years.  We have been fighting his addiction daily.  He has never stayed off of the crack.  He is in trouble with the law for bad checks.  He has really been making an effort to stay clean.  He has gone 10 days without smoking.  He says he does not even crave it anymore and I have nothing to worry about that he is through with it.  After smoking for so many years is it possible for someone just to stop like this or is he just fooling me and himself?

[Tammy]

hello I need help too my husband has plenty of money so he's crack usage has never hit rock bottom he thinks he is a great husband because he pays all the bills and keeps food in the house i never want for anything except my "Husband" the one who promise to love and respect me!!!!! evertime he uses he has an excuse I'm always mad or I gave up on him when reality is he gave up on us and he's self I knew my husband had a problem with crack before i married him but he was clean then & together we was going to fight this addiction. But it has not worked out that way about a year after we was married he started again not everyday not even every week but when he did it was hundred of dollers even thousands and for hours he doesn't come home even all nite sometimes but to him it is "NO BIG DEAL" I'm sittting home going crazy thinking all the worst things and he comes home like he's been at work for 8 hrs i should be happy to see him and in a strange way i am because i know he's not dead somewhere but i have let my anger go so many times and for maybe a month or so he's clean being the best husband I'm really confused because I know leaving him is the right thing to do but when you marry it is for better and worse and doesn't that mean fighting with everthing you got to keep your vows when is it ever time to give up on your marriage?

[cmd192007]

Let me just start off with saying that i do smoke crack, im 19 years old and have been smoking for 2 years off and on. Me being in denile and obviosly being 19 years old, i dont have the money to support a 100 dollars of crack everynight. But what i do know is that even though people stop smoking crack left and right, there needs to be a reason for them to do that. I always seem to start smoking again when i feel lonely and deppressed, but every time i have stopped was because i had someone there to tell me the consequenses of my actions. The best thing that i can tell you Tammy, is that if your husband has not stopped for you, is either because you have not told him what could happen with your relationship or that he wont quiot untill you do leave him and he notices when he hits rock bottom what hes lossed. You may think that i dont know what i am talking about because of my age, bust trust me, its best for your relationship to set boundries and leave him. Either way its the best for both of you.

[grievingwidow]

I know you probably did not realize this at the time but you posted a reply to a message from 2000, seven years ago.  This has been a problem since our forum made some changes last week and many people have been doing the same thing. Please keep around though and check our active posts.  Go to the top of page and click on forum and then click again on the Addiction forum in second paragraph.  

Thanks

[beachtowel]

Hello and welcome to the forum....

You mentioned you used N/A and Narconon........then you mention he really craves crack when he has been drinking...........

An addict has to obstain from all drugs and alcohol is a drug........what did you do at N/A and Narconon did you bother to even listen........

he needs 90 meetings in 90 days........talk to a drug counselor even inpatient drug rehab.........
Addiction is one of the worst diseases in our world today........and until people start treating it like a disease addiction will thrive for many years to come.......

[taryn13]

I am 34 yrs old.  I never seen Crack till last year when I met my boyfriend.  It has completly ruined my life.  I have been smoking for over 1 yr now... I have gone so far in debt & lost so much.  He has been smoking 4 yrs & is the greatest person when not on it but he won't quit.  I say every day that I am not doing it anymore.. I am so tired of making someone else money & I never have none... then he will take us right to it & once he lights up & give in... how can I stop this madness??  I am fine as long as I am not around it....  is there any help to this or is the only way to leave him????

[pleasehelp07]

From my experience with a crack head, I lived with one for 11 years, stole everything but the kitchen sink, i am sure there are people out there who can stop BUT they have to want it, from my experience crack heads will take you down with them everytime if you let them what i done after 11 years was tired of seeing my kids hurt and i kick is *** to the curb, he cried and pleaded with me "i dont have no place to live" well thats not my problem, what was my problem was my kids and not seeing them hurt no more, he chose to let his self get like this so he can live like this, we spent 1000.00 of on rehab 4 times aa, na ,ca, nothing why becuase he didnt want to quit he enjoyed the life of feeling 10ft tall and bullet proof. so fine you want that life live it by your self buddy well guess what happens, crack got control of him once again and now he has a perament place to live, where ya ask in the prison systems, he let it control him and now is doing time for 2 counts of arm robbery and theift over 10,000 so i hope he can be straighting up when he gt out in bout 20 years. all i can say is let him/her go.

[CATUF]

Run away.  Don't walk, run (fast).

If you think it's bad now, stick around someone who's still using and you'll be seeing worse.   It will get worse.  It ALWAYS gets worse.

Most folks in Recovery will tell you that they had to completely avoid all People, Places and Things  associated with using.  Completely.  All of 'em.

Grab hold of the moment of clarity that allowed you to see this for the madness that it is.  Get away from it now.  Those moments of clarity often don't last too long - it's more than just a possibility that next week (or tomorrow) you be thinking "Why did I think this was madness? This isn't so bad" and it will just keep getting worse and worse and worse . . . and you'll care less and less and less . . .

Get away and get clean while you have a chance.  You're running out of time.  

CATUF
DAY-786

[taryn13]

Why does it have to be so hard.  You finally find someone you love so much but they have this demon on them.  I have asked GOD to open my eyes to things and they are starting to see things that I didn't want to see.  You hold on to the good in the person but when the crack man comes calling they change into that other person that thinks of ways to get more money to get more crack!!  Like I said before I do fine till I get around it then I give in to the temptations.  I want to get away from it, it makes me so angry at myself for all that I have lost because of it in last year.  As everyone else has faced he did stop and everything was great, but when he ran into someone it started all over again, the dealers ring the phone off the hook...  I feel so used sometimes and such a fool....

[self doubt]

I am living with an addict.  I see in some of the comments on this sight that I am not alone.  Much of my daily problems are shared by many.  I am glad to know that I am not alone, but also sad that we ALL have to go through this.  I think I came to this page for answers as to how I can solve this problem but I already know that if he is not wanting to change nothing will change.  He too when sober is a wonderful husband and father but when he is in need of a fix nothing or no one else matters.  It is sad that I have no one to talk to but some strangers on a web site that I chanced up on but it actually feels good to let it out.  I have been fighting this war for 8 years and I am ready to waive the white flag and quit now, but I feel so much confusion on whether it is the right decision.  My children love their dad more than anything in the world but they do not deserve the pain of the uncertainty daily and I don't either.  Does anyone know what it will take for him to wake up and get help or is the best choice for my family (me & my boys) to find happiness is pack up and run?

[Dave W.]

I feel for you. I was once a coke addict for 10 years,including alcohol. I just
kept using almost every day. Got arrested twice,but that just made me find
another dealer in a safer area to go to for more years. I did have this addiction
when I met my wife. She just thought I drank alot,but eventually she started
to wonder where all our money was going.I kept part of my pay from her,
to support my habit and gave her the part of the check,which she always
thought was the whole thing. I did hit rock bottom as far as work went,since
I was always hung over and strung out. My boss made me go to rehab or get
fired.Went to rehab as he said,but beleive it or not,I have stopped for weeks at
a time,just because I could and did want to. I never really went through he bad
withdrawls like most everyone does,it was the fact that I didn't want to stop
for good. Never hit complete rock bottom,that's why I never really had a strong
reason t make me quit. My wife was mad when my boss called her and said
what problem I had and what I had to do or get fired. That was my awakening.
I didn't want to lose my wife or job,so I made up my mind that I was going to
do this for them and most of all,myself. I did want to quit,just never had a desire
or opportunity to have someone front me the money for rehab. It was a total
success,because I knew if I didn't go get clean then,that I would never do it and
probably end up overdosing or killing myself in the end. If I were in your shoes,
I'd tell him you will leave him if you don't get professional help,and that your not
kidding.If he says no,leave for as long as you need to,until he wakes up or when
you see that he really doesn't need you. It's a very ,very hard thing to do,but it's
what you need to do to save not just him,yourself too. Good luck and God Bless.

[Wchloe]

I am 51 years old and my husband and I used a lot of cocaine in the 80's & 90's.  I went back to college in the early 90's while working, and there was simply no more room in my life for any drugs.  I quit just b/c I was sick of drugs!  After all, all drugs do is stunt your growth, and mask the real world.  Unfortuntely, my husband didn't stop and by 1999, he collapsed and was taken to the hospital in an ambulance that the neighbors called.  He flatllined 2 times, he ended up with kidney failure and had to go on dialysis for 3 months.  Thank God, his kidney function returned, but it took a full year for him to recover.  I was told at the hospital that he needed to go to detox, but my husband convinced me that his near-death experience was better than any detox program, and I believed him.  He stayed off cocaine for almost 6 years, but then, suprisingly started using it on the weekends, along with drinking.  Recently, he stopped for 8 months, but now he's back at it again.  He locks himself in the bathroom / bedroom for the entire weekend and does coke all weekend.  I am at my wits end, and I don't think I can take it anymore!

[Dave W.]

I feel for you. I had a horrible 10 year battle,but did get forced by my employer to
go to rehab,which I did and got clean. The hardest part about Coke,is that it is
always in the back of your brain,making you think about doing it all the time,
even when you've stopped. He needs to go to a rehab that uses the use of
niacin,the drug bomb and a sauna for at least a month. What it does is get all the
toxins out of the body,it's the bits of the toxins left in the body that are like making
you always need it. Once the toxins are out of the body,the cravings stop
completely. Hope this helped and God Bless.

[NOTACRACKHEAD]

Once a crack head always a crack head!!! Know from watching my family members all of my life. If your kids are important to you as you say they are, THEY WILL COME FIRST. TAKE THEM AND RUN. You can't help someone that doesn't want to help themselves. Your kids deserve a better future other than to be taught that using drugs is acceptable. EVEN WORSE THAT ENABLING A DRUG USER IS A WAY OF LIFE. To sum it up, "TOUGH LOVE"!

[yetanothernewmember]

please don't take this the wrong way but, try to imagine this:  you're combing the internet for information on the addiction, reading other people's stories, learning about different approaches, discovering support groups, etc.  through one of your searches, you stumble upon this website.  as you read the postings, you notice a lot of similarities between what the posters have experienced and instances in your own life, particularly the effects addiction can have on relationships with significant others.  you reflect on your own relationship, what has  happened, what could happen.  no one wants to be in a relationship that isn't satisfying and fulfilling and certainly one with an addict often times is not.  "run, don't walk".  "tough love".  "save yourself".  "get away".  it's tough for you to read this because you just simply don't want to believe that your situation is this hopeless.  it's even tougher to read because YOU are the addict.  maybe you are currently fighting addiction but looking, wanting, hoping to make a change.  you're praying that everything you've ever read or been told is true, that you can change, you can get your life back, you don't have to feel any worse about yourself than you already do.  

please don't take this the wrong way, but reading these postings makes the future of an addict looking to recover seem a little more bleak and little less worth fighting for.  if anything in this posting seems unrealistic or unlikely, just trust me.  it's more than a possibility.


p.s. - this is in no way an attempt to censor or place restrictions on anyone's opinion or their right to express it when and where they choose.  i firmly believe in entitlment to one's own opinions.  it is simply meant to provide another perspective within this forum.  thanks.

[Ketchup75]

Hello all. I am reading all these comments and I've got tears in my eyes. I have been with my fiance' for about 4 1/2 years and we'vve had our problems but this is the worst thing I have ever experienced. He lost his job at the end of June and apparently that's when he started smoking crack. I knew he had snorted coke here and there at parties & was not happy about it and wasn't shy about stating my distaste and disgust with the behavior. As a drinker, I think it kept me from seeing what was coming. Now it's 2 plus months since he's been using habitually and he owes everyone under the sun money. 2 weeks ago he stole my debit card and ripped me off for $460. (this on top of what I've had to pay back to others he has burned/the loan he took out on his truck) He confessed it to me a couple of days later and was very remorseful and upset about it all. I truly belive he no longer wants to use and he is so beside himself with guilt and disgust. However, I don't think a week of being clean is going to change anything. Trying to convince him to check into an "in patient" rehab is going nowhere. I am tired of crying and missing work trying to fix him and his mistakes. I am scared and unsure about what the future will bring. I just needed to vent. I am so worried that there may not be a light at the end of the tunnel but a train that will wipe him/us out.

[Dave W.]

Sorry to hear about your fiance's issues with Coke. As far as you trying to
get him to go to a rehab,I hate to say it,but he has to be the one to want
to go and get help,no matter how much you,or anyone wants him to go.
You will just be beating yourself up,in the meantime. The "Addict" needs
to want help. It's a shame,but it's the reality of it. Just look at the show
"Intervention". How many addicts are forced into rehab,against their will
practically,just to fail. If they truely don't want help,at that time,it just
won't happen,until unfortuneately,something serious happens,and makes
them want to do it on their own. I'm truely sorry for not telling you the
things you would want to hear as support,but being brutily honest,is
all I can be. God Bless and hope you can somehow make him see,that
he really should want to do this,not for you,but for himself,too.It's the only
way,sorry to say.Peace.

[NOTACRACKHEAD]

Please know yje last comment made was not to discourage a crack head from getting help. It was only to tell you that if you are in a relationship and they don't want help then you have to count for something. Yes crack is a disease. It breaks my heart to see someone fall to the death grip of this disease. You also have to realize they have a choice. Don't ever start. If you or someone you love has an addiction professional help is needed. An addict can't quit on thier own. They have to have will to quit. They have to want to help themselves or nothing you do or say will make a difference. They have to leave all bad habits alone in order to get away from crack. Alchohol, prescription drugs and other street drugs. They have to get help or you have to leave. Save yourself. If they can't admit there is a problem then they are not ready. Good luck!

[0cean]

Hi...... I have been using crack for 4 yrs. i want to quit its ruining my life. some weeks im smoking a 8 ball to myself a day. i started always smoking with ppl. but now i just like to smoke by myself. some days i feel like i have it under control. then i dont know what happens. its like i remember that feeling.... the high. and I'm just smoking again. i dont know.... i just dont know......

[0cean]

Yea i can relate. That what its like for me. See i havent been able to talk to anyone about this. i worried to go to the dr. i dont think anyone really understands what i mean when i say its hard to stop. i was checking out that baclofen used to treat muscle symptoms caused by multiple sclerosis. do you really think thats what i need???

[Jessie26]

Hello everyone..... I have been dating an addict myself as well. Reading these posts brought tears to my eyes, I think it's because I know I have to leave him.  I can't go on any longer like this. Day in and day out wondering if he is going to go out and do this stuff. Waiting up hours when he is. Going crazy out of my mind!!!! Not to mention how depressed I have become. Never in all the obstacles that life has thrown my way have I ever felt so sad.  Maybe I should mention a few of my experiences, hypothyroid, lupus ( that means the faituge, hair loss, arthritis, nauesa, dizziness, chest pain, etc) o and ya when I was younger was perscribed a med for acne and now have scars on my shoulders. After all this and more I still had a smile on my face and was just a happy person. Not anymore!!!! His addiction has taken its toll on me and all I wanna do is spend my days crying.  Writting this I wanna just let it all out, but I'm in school now sitting in front of the teacher trying to look llike I'm doing my work. Ahhhhhhh I cant take this Sh** anymore!!!!!!

[0cean]

You know i am trying my best to fight my addiction to crack and i have no support group. i can only imagine what you must be going through. you sound like you would be a great person to provide support to him you know, kinda like helping him take the steps into a new direction in a life the both of you can be happy with. but i think he has to want to stop and only then can he be helped. as for me myself i'm not even sure how to get help. i have never really started talking to anyone about it. i find it hard to speak about it, like ppl will judge me or kinda jump to some sort of conclusion. i wish your well on the out come and hope it can be a positive one.

[0cean]

I was checking out that baclofen and it dose cut the craving. but i need a precription for it. i have never seen a dr. about my addiction. i have never till now spoke about my addiction. i was thinking about it last night how my life has become so comsumed by this "devil". and i just went out and got another 8 ball. its just to accessible to me. i need help. but i dont know where to turn. who to ask. i want to stop this maddness.

[helplessly in love]

my ex boyfriend, who i'm madly in love with is using coke. i know all the teribly things that happen people when they use coke and how it screws you up, i just want him to stop. he does oxy cotton too. i'm helpless. he is going to drop out of high school and he is only a freshman. i need help. how can i get him to quite using coke and oxy cotton and get him to wake up. i love him but i can't stand knowing he could die. he has been smoking weed for 3 years and drinking for 2. i love this boy, but he needs to wake up. can someone please help me. my email is ***@****
PLEASE HELP ME! I'M DESPERATE. I NEED ADVICE AND WISDOM TO GET ME THROUGH THIS. CAN ANYONE HELP ME.
thank you, alexa

[FLaddict]

Girly you are too young to be dealing with this stuff... you need to forget about this boy and move on.

[helplessly in love]

its not that simple. i'm crazy about him. i've known him for two years and everytime i see him i melt. its just become so crazy lately. i know i should move on but everytime i try, i can't. do you know how i can get the coke to stop? please help me.

[FLaddict]

Honey, its hard to get someone to quit doing drugs, they have to want to stop. i would hate for you to put all your energy into something that is impossible and you will waste the years of being young. All you can do is support him when he is ready to stop.. until then you can try to convince him but he will probably just push you farther away.

Good luck to you..

[helplessly in love]

ugh. i know its hard but i would do anything for this boy. i want to tell his parents but i don't want him to hate me. and i 've been looking alot into what can happen how he can die if he drinks alcohol and does coke at the same time, and i know he is a heavy drinker, so i'm really worried. should i just talk to about it? or should i tell him that until he straitens up i don't want to be in his life, but when he is done screwing up his life to call me? or something like that? thank you so much FLaddict. ur reallying helping me. i haven't talked to anyone about this problem and it feels so good to get it off my back.

[FLaddict]

you could try the approach of  'when he is off the drugs to call you" maybe that will make him realize that his drug use affects the people in his life. you could ""anonymously" tell his parents. send them a letter or something..
It does help to talk about it... there are meeting called Naranon meetings, they are for friends or family members of drug addicts. you could see if there is one near you get support for yourself so you can help him when he is ready. they have a website you could google it and see if there is a local one for you to attend or the guidance counselor at your school may be able to tell you about a support group.
The best thing you can do is just be there to support him when he is ready but don't let him pull you into his negative world stay strong.. my husband was so supportive when i was ready to quit taking pills, he never judged me or put me down and now i have been off for 4 months and he is still amazing..
you sound like you have a good head on your shoulders for your age.. your parents should be very proud of you. stay just as you are, don't try to fit in, be yourself..

I hope I helped some, i know this is frustrating..

[helplessly in love]

Well people like you make me smile even when everythings wrong. and ur right it is very frustrating. but just like you stopped i know he can. and i'll make sure to look up that sight and see what they can do for me. i thought i was hopeless. i'll always suport him and just like your husband i don't judge him, i think he is making mistakes he'll regret but i'm going to stick by his side until he wakes up. when there are so many great things about some one, i can never see a reason to give up. i've tried drugs like oxy cotton and pot, but i never did it again. i'm proud of myself and my parents don't know this, but someday i'll get the courage and tell them. I guess if he doesn't quit and i tried to help i won't feel as bad as if i didn't try to help and something bad happens. i may possibly send them a lettter or maybe even make a call, i just can see some i love ruin there life. Thank you so much.
if you have a myspace look me up. my email is party baby 22 @ aim . com   hopefully that showed up just take away all the spaces. and thats my e mail. or if u have some time, maybe you could talk to me? thats only if u have time and want to. I've got piles of homework so i'm heading out, but thank you so much! i'll be on tomorow so hopefully hear from you. its nice to have someone who understands and has been through something like this.
thanks, alexa <3

[FLaddict]

Your welcome Alexa..  my email is in my profile if you need someone to talk to..

I have been there done that as far as being your age and doing drugs and being boy crazy.. so I do have some experience there for sure. i also worked in a rehab center for 3 years. And ran NA meetings in a teen addiction facility for a few years on and off.  Young people your age are even harder to try to get them to see the light so you have your work cut out for you with your friend. They think they are invicible and that nothing bad can happen I too was like that when I was a 16 yr old heroin addict. But I finally got clean from that and will have 8 years clean from heroin and hard drugs on the 16th of this month. I had a run with pills after I had surgery 2 years ago.. and i couldn't stop taking them so now i am off those too. Have hope for your friend if you believe he can quit maybe he will start to believe it..

[drekimash]

doesn't this seem like an endless fight?!! to all of you who are married or in love with an addict, i know what you are going through. my highschool sweetheart of 13 years is a crack addict. has been for about 4 years that i know of, and he just admitted that a few years ago - I had always thought it was marijuana and bars. He has never done it in front of me, thankfully out of respect for me and my daughter. But so many times we have seperated over this, only to get back together and try something different. He has got involved with a Men's Ministry and a rehab class at our church. At first it was going well, but here we are again -- ANOTHER relapse. He took my car a few days ago, and I haven't heard from him since. I am so sick of this disease. But what do you do? You are SUPPOSED to stick by your other half through good times and BAD, not just give up. But, I am not able to help him anymore, no matter what i do, he keeps going back. We have a 10 year old daughter and she is having to miss gymnastic practices now when he wants to just take the car and leave, its like he forgets we have a life too! Thanks for letting me vent. I am glad I found this site.

[Troublex2]

There are ways to help him but he has to want to be helped and who is he really without the drug.  People change when they use.  I think the worst thing to do is walk away but talk to him sober and tell him how you feel.  Tell him you will be there every step of the way to his recovery

[Wchloe]

What the majority of people say is "the addict must want to stop or it will NEVER happen" - that is the truth.  It is all up the the addict, but we can at least not be their enabler.

[Jessie26]

I have a hard time understanding my b/f and his addiction. I know thats its tough to quit, I know he has to want to quit,(hold on he tells me he wants to quit) I know I need to support him and I do all of this, yet he still insists on telling me lies. Oddly enough, I know every single time he is out using. With just one missed call I know. The knots in my stomach begin, another missed call, how much money does he have on him? Then when he finally answers, his tone is different. If I see him in person, he looks different. His pupils are dilated. Yet he can look me straight in the eye and tell me he hasn't taken any drugs. All I can do is laugh at that point, cause its a big joke!!!!! Then he tells me he WANTS to quit. Well, if thats true then why hasn't he. What is he waiting for????? I tell him he doesn't want to quit, if he did he would have already..... apparently I just don't understand his disease. Maybe I don't, but one thing I do understand and that's the power of the mind. If he truly wanted to quit he could! Thats the bottom line.I am still with him, to this day but feel like our relationship will inevitably end. I have made this very cler to him and he just keeps telling me he wants to quit. Last time I checked I didn't have STUPID written on my forehead.  I feel like he takes me for an idiot. You want to quit then QUIT!!!!

[byronh]

i had been smoking for a few months.crack is very addictive.when i looked at myself and what i had become that made me stop. you have to get sick and tired of being sick and tired.

[meem50]

Crack took me from being an affluent legal secretary to a homeless bum in 2 years.  On October 25, 2006, I quite and haven't gone back.  I sure hope it isn't true what you said about "once a crack addict, always a crack addict."  If it is, I might as well go use today because it hasn't been easy and, if I''m going to use again anyway, I might as well start today.

How could you say such a thing to people looking for hope?  I have a message of hope.  I had to lose everything I ever had before I hit bottom, but there was no one around to encourage me (or threaten me) to stop.  I think it is like that for most addicts.  When I think back on where that drug took me, its like a nightmare - dark and gloomy- frightening!  I will never go back there again!  To those of you in despair because of the addict in your life, you will probably have to leave your addict.  That will be one of his/her consequences, but it will be a big step toward that person's bottom.  Don't help him/her prolong their own misery by enabling them (and you) to stay sick.  Believe it or not, my brand new husband of 6 months (a Christian I met at my church), is totally hooked on crack.  That foul demon has found it's way back into my life.  I am terrified, so am preparing for the enevitable.  I will have to leave.  I can't save him from that stuff.  But I can save me.  May God comfort you all and give you strength.

[meem50]

I did crack for two years.  I loved it at first.  I had a lot of money and a lot of credit in the beginning so I used a lot.  It was really fun.  Part of my addiction was the fun of getting my pipe ready and buring the screen and making a pusher.  i liked cooking my own too.  I'd spend hours perfecting my method.  I loved the adrenalin rush of going to pick up.  Sometime during the second year though it changed.  I was always scared - no, paranoid.  If we were inside, like in one of those cheap motels we would rent just to use, I always thought there was a hole in the wall and somebody was watching us or the cops were going to bust in any minute.  When we were smoking on the street at night (stupid) I'd see things that weren't there like the light bar on top of a cop car.  My boyfriend used to just light up without bending down under the dash to hide the light.  It drove me crazy!  Later I started thinking there were some wierd living organisims crawling around under the skin on my arms and legs and I'd pick and pick to get them out.  I have scars all over my arms and legs from that.  I couldn't wear short sleeve shirts for a whole year.  We always used glass pipes and I started thinking that the glass was melting and it was in my throat or that little pieces of glass mixed with the smoke was all over my bedspread where I would sit and smoke for hours and that it had permeated the skin you know where.  My paranoia got worse and worse until there was absolutely no enjoyment from smoking at all.  It was terrifying from the very first hit.  One time I was smoking alone in my van on the street.  Suddenly I heard helicopters going around and around, which wasn't really unusually in the area I was in, but I heard the megaphones and footsteps right outside the door.  I lay motionless on the floor of the van for what seemed hours until I didn't hear anything anymore.  When I finally looked out, there was nothing there and nobody around.  I still don't know if anybody was really there or not.  We got rolled up on more times than I care to remember during my using days.  Somehow the cops only took my boyfriend.  I never went to jail.  The reason we were outside alot, by the way, and why I was using in that van is because I lived in it.  I had all that money because I had sold my house and was using all my equity, my inheritance from my mother, to buy dope.  When it was all gone, I started on the credit cards.  When they maxed out and I couldn't pay the bill, i started pawing stuff or trading stuff for dope.  In the beginning all the dealers loved me.  I was treated with respect.  By the end of the second year, I was just a dirty, homeless crack head and they made sure I knew it.  

You guys who are still using and "liking it," listen to me.  You are going to read stories like this over and over and over.  Do you know why?  Smoking crack is not like going to the neighborhood bar for a martini.  This is an incidious drug that will chew you up and spit you out no matter who you are.  It changes you, it controls you and it ruins everybody who touches it eventually.  It might be too late for you.  You might have to lose everyting before you will be willing to reach out for help.  You need to see that drug for what it is:   a hideous monster, an evil demon, Satan's tool - or simply a chemical that can and will have a devestating effect on your health, your life and the life of anyone close to you.  To this day, when I think about using, I get that adrenalin rush and I have been free from that stuff for 2 years and 6 months.  But I'm sooo afraid of ever reliving that nightmare that I have been able to resist it with relative ease.  Stay away from this drug at all costs.  Don't touch it.  

[Greatgreebo]

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Greebs

[stephison]

Please Help.  I have been married for 9 years.  My husband is addicted to crack cocaine.  You don't know how hard it is for me to admit this.  He has been addicted for about 8 years.  I believe he has gone a year without using, but it always come back to haunt me.  I now sit here at home on Friday (his payday) with a sick feeling in my stomach wondering if he will be home with any money left in his pocket.  This past year has been the worst.  I have had to go to a dealers house and collect my truck that he left for collateral for drugs that he had fronted.  I have had to sneak on someone's property and literally steal his truck for the same reasons.  I have had multiple things "stolen" from the house by him and traded for drugs.  We have two beautiful children and I know that they need a more stable life.  However, I can't help but feel that if I leave him either he will get really bad and I won't be strong enough to say no.  I could really use some guidence.  I hope someone is still reading this.

[timetochange]

I have been a crack addict for 4 years and I am sitting here, at my mum's house having been told by my wife she does not want me home until something changes. I have read a lot of your comments and found them useful. Crack is an incredibly enticing, but ultimately destructive horrible drug. I am so ashamed of where the drug has taken me - I have begged, stolen, lied, deceived, broken promises. I learnt to hate myslelf - from a confident man with a wonderful life to a pathetic, immoral sex and crack addict that lets prostitutes into his house, dresses them in his wifes clothes and ends up begging for drugs when they are all finished. And then I ask for my wife to have me back? Yes - the drug has made me insane.

[Jay10000]

I hate crack. I hate the drug so much. I have only been smoking for 3 months a couple of times a week, and I consider myself an addict. This is how deadly this drug is. I am so scared of the potential to lose control of this drug, that I quit, and have not smoked in 3 days. It's NOT worth it. The awesome 3 minute high is NOT worth the days, weeks, and years of pain. ANd definitely NOT worth that health problems associated with this junk.

[gizzy32]

Jay this is a really old post. U can post your own question if you want. I just wanted to say the good news is you have only smoked 3 months, the bad news is it will still be hard to quit. If ya wanna talk about this send me a pm or go to top and post a question. I am a cocaine addict and for awhile watched some people close to me get involved with crack and it will take you down quicker than you can imagine. This is probably the best advice you will have gotten, cause your life depends on it right now, get some help now cause you can stop, 3 months from now you will have reached another level and there is no turning back, please believe me. Wishing you luck man, hope to hear from ya.