day 4

wake up tmrw and i will be on day 4.....these last couple days seem likes WEEKS... glad to be this far...but please time pass faster!!  

[conhall]

Just think about Today dont worry about tomorrow or time I Know its easier said than done But just try and worry about the minutes you are on now. Not Tonight bedtime or even an hour from now Just right now this minute :) You can get through this minute right? They really do add up I promise small steps

[toothfairie]

thanks conhall!!  i'm trying to stay busy....well as busy as the laptop and tv are...haha  don't seem to have any energy yet....hoping that will come soon....it's a struggle just to brush my hair and teeth....let alone do laundry etc....Thank God i have the rest of this week off....i just pray i'll be able to go back to work next Monday...idk tho..

[Silkie55]

Your doing so good!!!! You got this girl! Lol

[toothfairie]

thank you my friend!!  i'm scratching thru each min!!  lol  bored as H@LL tho!!  no energy to do anything but crawling out of my skin!!  uggggg

[Silkie55]

Believe me I understand! Hey your not use to being home, working 2 jobs your on the go all the time! Ohh maybe treat yourself to a massage! Wouldn't that be nice and you could get out of the house a little!

[conhall]

Do You have NetFlix? watch a show that has like 10 seasons and it will keep your mind off this temporary fix but it does help . :)))
Minute by minute hour by hour No worries about Monday just today

[toothfairie]

yes silkie i work alot so i'm not used to being home all the time.....work mon-thur.....then 2-3 weekends every month with the military.....and i love that job.....was suppose to be on base this weekend for 3 days.....make me sick to have to cancel...but oh well, i did this to myself and hopefully i'll be back on base and in my office soon!!  just want to get myself well first!!  cant even think about going to work right now!!  uggggg

[toothfairie]

no don't have netflix but i have alot of shows DVR'd so i have plenty to watch...but i get so bored with tv now.....can't concentrate...so i keep coming on here to check the posts and boards....this really has been a blessing to me...all the people here.....i have been on YouTube alot watching diff clips and outtakes that make me laugh so that helps!!!  

[conhall]

YouTube is great also whatever you can do to keep your mind busy .
I also came on the boards alot also many people on here pulled me through when I was going thru CT Wds . It helps to write and read. The support on here is amazing.

[toothfairie]

it truly is!!  i looked at several diff sites....and kept coming back to this one!!  an angel def led me here!  so glad i posted that first post...i was so scared and so alone....and now i'm almost at day 4 and still scared but not as bad!  this place IS amazing!!!  i know there is a long road ahead of me.but with God and this site i think i will make it!!  and aftercare  lol

[conhall]

good morning  How are you doing ?

[toothfairie]

i'm here girl!!  tired from no sleep...noisy neighbors...but i slept 3-4 hrs i think.....diff stresser every day i think....thinking about this....or that....but i'll make it....when your head becomes clearer the repercussions of things you've done become very stressful...thanks for asking!!  sorry i unloaded there a bit...haha

[Pat1956100]

I know what you mean.  It can be so overwhelming but you are taking control of your life back and doing things to help.
You have done so well and I am so happy for you.
Start being proud of yourself for getting clean for you and for you son.
It isn't an easy thing to do and you are almost over the hump.
You did it girl, be proud.

[Sonrissa]

Hey Toothfairie! Welcome to day 5, I think, right? You are doing so great! Noisy neighbors suck! I have some too! They seem to think its OK to stand in the middle of their driveway at 2am and scream out their marital problems for the whole world to hear! They have woken me up a few times! Don't you just want to scream "Shut the Effff up! I am a Secret Detoxer and I'm in the middle of withdrawals, and trying to sleep!" LOL!

Take care, I hope you have a good day! Try to stay active if possible!

[Pat1956100]

LOL Sonrissa.  Yup, this is when you definitely need my pretend gun to shoot those creeps.  It worked for the annoying birds for me way back when.  I wonder if it would work for annoying neighbours.
I think we're going to need a bigger pretend gun.
I will work on it.

[Sonrissa]

LOL! I forgot about your pretend gun! Funny! Yes, it may be time to upgrade it!

[toothfairie]

hahahah Sonrissa.....i'm just glad i don't have any real guns around me or my ceiling would be bullet riddin!!  lmao!!  they just yell and laugh and party all night...3-4 of them....not even sure they all live there....anyway, i plan to complain (not that it will do much good)  but oh well....i need my WD REST PEOPLE!!  lol  

[toothfairie]

and Pat...let me borrow your pretend gun plz!!  lol  i've banged on the walls and the idiots thought someone was knocking on the front door...i heard them come down the stairs....hahahah made me laugh actually....stupid a@@  people!!  

[toothfairie]

and it's day 4 for me Sonrissa!!  wish it was 5....lol  and thanks for all your support!!  that last line you wrote secret detoxer....aahahahahaha!!  that's exactly how i felt!!!!

[conhall]

I Had a Noisy neighbor with a Dog That barked all Night! I actually went and knocked on their door at 2AM and asked DO YOU HEAR THAT! they said Huh I said Do You HEAR THAT ! they shut door and I have never heard dog bark at night again I must Of Looked scary! LOL :O

[conhall]

This happened when I was Detoxing I was Mean Ole B!tch!

[toothfairie]

hahaha i was afraid to go up there because there are 3-4 big guys.....lol and i don't have a filter on a good day much less now!!  i would have either been dead or in jail for trying to claw their faces off!!  lmao!  so i'm gonna do the chicken thing and report them to the office.....then security if it happens tonight....this is bull***

[conhall]

I was crazy woman I cant even believe I did that! But I was Detoxing and I was seeing RED! hahaha now when they see me they just act like I am not there they look away ;-) I must of scarred them all 115 pounds of me But I had that look Like dont mess with me :p

[toothfairie]

lol i know what you mean...i'd hate for anyone to see me now...that knows me anyway.....i took ROUGH!!  look like i've lost weight....eyes all sunk it....a hot mess!!  but i'm staying clean and the rest will follow!!   sometimes we just have to let our emotions out and too bad for whoever is in the path!! lol especially if it's someone that pi@@ed us off to begin with.!!!

[Colorless]

Just wanted to say "hi"...Day 4 .... woohoo!  I remember that was during the time that I would debate with myself on whether putting on my bra was doable or not that day!!!  Such an enormous undertaking!  And that would determine if I could consider leaving the house....leaving the house without the bra was not an option!  Gravity can be so sad..  Anyway, great job!  Keep on keepin' on.  Much love

[toothfairie]

thanks colorless!!  yes i know what you mean!!  haven't washed my hair in days yet but i've had tons of hot baths!!  and i've been out of the house twice to get supplies etc...only because i HAD to....it was so hard to do it but had no choice......