first day on methadone detox...wish me luck!

[wolvey]

Hello all! This is my first time on any detox program, and I need all the support I can get! I have read through a few discussions on here and all of you have lead me to get help! Thank you all! I have been addicted to heroin, oxy contin, delaudids, roxy contin for 6 years now. Hope fully I can stay drug free after today!

[TysonRed]

Welcome and good luck with your journey. This is a great place to come to, it offers alot of wonderful support and advice from others with addiction struggles. I was on methadone for a long time, and while it did help me be more functionable, it also led to its own addiction problem that I eventually had to deal with. I can tell you one thing for me anyways, methadone withdrawls are much harder to deal with than oxy's and some people say even the heroin, its because methadone has such a long half life, so the withdrawls last for a long time. But Im glad to hear your taking a step forward in getting clean, I just wanted to warn you a bit about relying to much upon the methadone. If you ever are interested in any other alternative methods of getting clean just post whatever question you may have. Good luck with the methadone.

[wolvey]

Thanx man! I heard about the crazy w.d.'s of methadone, but thought what the hell,
even if I end up being a bit dependant on methadone, it beats spending 300 dollars a day on heroin or oxy! Plus not having to worry about chasing and being sick if i don't find anything is well worth it! I thank you and everyone for being so supportive! I am glad there are forums like this to help me get through it. Having a feeling of not being alone and gaining confidence with everyones experiences and answers! I love you guys!!! One question though, I am on 30mg right now because the doctor said he knows I am an addict and want a higher dose because of it. But really I just want a higher dose so my cravings aren't as bad. I feel ****** and want to hook up bad still. Not as sick but still not so hot! I think maybe 50 mg would be better for me. Any advice on how to get a higher dose? The doctor actually said I can try another clinic, but the doctor at the other clinic won't be in till Tuesday. I was wondering until then maybe I can persuade the doctor at this one to higher it.

[wolvey]

Man my dealers have been texting me saying "what happened to you?" "I got some bomb 80's" god they are predators! I am thinking about getting a new number but it's so inconvenient! I hope I don't fall into the dark side guys!

[diane001]

how inconvenient is it chasing drugs if you want to make a change in your life then you have to make a change in your life. i feel like chasing right now too. my cravings are bad. really all you have to do is call your phone provider and request a new number or just simply hit the F-YOU button. be strong

[sadinmichigan]

you think chasing heroin and oxys is bad...dude..you don't have any idea what kind of hellish w/ds methadone can cause..as far as thinking you need a higher dose...well i will just give you my opinion...you don't get the high off methadone that your used to...but honestly..your dose should be enough for you to get clean and not have w/ds...methadone builds up in your system so being on it one day..you are not going to have the full affect of it..methadone stays in your system about 36 hrs..your body only metabolizes about 80%..so the next day..you take your dose..and the same thing all over..give it a few days before you increase your dose..and I would just like to say..I am sorry that you are already prepared to stay on it for life if need be..that isn't quality of life...getting and staying clean takes work...and it's well worth it..so good luck..

[wolvey]

yeah! I totally just did the F-you button, but in a semi nice way! hahaa! I will stay strong, It just ***** because In my line of work its all around. The art/fashion world is a vicious one! Drugs all around and people just look at you as like they know you better! Like "oh my god your wasting your time! You love getting high so don't deny it!" I guess I just have to press the F-You button to them too when I face them. It's a test of my will. I WILL defeat them. I am soon gonna laugh at them when I actually keep the money I make of my paintings and modeling. Where as they are just gonna keep being broke and make art to support there addiction with nothing to show for it! I can't wait for that day.
But boy do I love getting High! I am not sick right now... but soooooo bored and can't seem to sit still to get any painting done. I got a photo shoot soon too and feel like I am going to look like **** without drugs....but thats stupid because I probably looked like **** on them! Hahahaa!

[diane001]

well, i ain't looking too hot today either but is there any way you can re-schedule

[wolvey]

Thanx sadinmichigan!
I know its gonna be hellish to w.d. off methadone, but I had to get on it because c/t was just death to me. I wanted a higher dose but not too high...but yes I am being told by several people to just wait a few days to see if i really do need a higher dose. I am not looking for a high off methadone, just to not be sick and crave as bad. To last me through out the day and night. I am a newbie at this detox thing so thanks for all the advice and wisdom. Thank you.

[wolvey]

yeah I am def. re-scheduling and saying I have the flu. I am gonna take some vitamins and exercise until then. But it's weird for this company they actually kind of want you to look like you have been using! They like skinny pale hipster kind of men. So who knows they might like the new me? Hahaa!

[diane001]

my daughter is home from school and needs computer. i'll check back later

[diane001]

can't find where i was before. it is getting confusing. the sweats are getting bad. and my stomach won't let me eat much. i am really dreading bedtime

[godezzofchaos]

I have been reading this forum for sometime now, and while everyone is usually VERY VERY supportive, many don't feel that Methadone is a form of recovery....I 100% disagree. I myself have been on methadone for a LONG time, I am on a MMT (methadone maintence treatment) and it was a lifesaver.  I have been on the same 150mg dose for MANY years and have a very successful career, and family life...methadone doesn't have to be a CURSE!  I have worked my program EXACTLY how it should be worked and have never touched another drug nor do I drink.  Unfortuantly, it sounds like your doctor is not well schooled on how methadone works.  Yes, you should start off on a low dose, but one does not even receive the opiate blockage until 80mg..therefore a person on a lower dose tends to continue to crave and is not successful in stabilizing.  Research has also shown that although many believe that staying on a lower dose will help them detox FASTER and EASIER..this is not true because they never fully stopped craving to begin with.

Once you have become stable and have rebuilt your life you can begin a VERY slow detox off of the methadone..so slow it is not noticeable..which is exactly what I do. I am SLOWLY detoxing just 2mg a week...that is MY PLAN and works for me.

Please don't everyone attack me either..I've heard it all, all I am saying is that my recovery is no less an accomplishment than anyone elses ( I stil had to make the decision, I had to change the people, places , and things I did)..I just wasn't sick, and that is what got me through. Now onto my new journey...GOOD LUCK WOLVEY!  If you have any questions..feel free to ask!!

[wolvey]

GODEZZOFCHAOS YOU ROCK! Yeah I looked into another clinic that is more reasonable and does not think I am asking for a higher dose because I am a junkie! I just know that my cravings are really bad and my withdrawals are even worse! The only reason why I went to this clinic is because the place I wanted to go originally did not have a doctor in on Fridays and won't until Tuesday! I was like you know I am going to hook up if thats the case! So I had to go to this clinic and the doctor was just not cool and said 30 is the highest and to take it or leave it basically. Ofcourse I took it because I was about to puke right there! Plus no money to hook up even if I wanted to. So I am going to have to wait till Tuesday to change clinics and be able to up my dose. Hopefully I can stay strong until then because I am feeling ****** and want to hook up soooo bad! Its gonna be 10 more hours until my next dose! AGHHHHH! God help me! I am going bananas! All I am doing is watching Bullets over Broadway by Woody Allen! How bored am i!? I really need something but know I can't! Don't worry folks! I am gonna stay strong tonite even though I probably am going to stay up all night and morning till my next dose! Wish me luck and thank you I love you all!

[godezzofchaos]

Wolvey, I"m wondering what stae you live in...I'm in Tennessee and they start us off on 35mg and then u increase every other sday by 10 mg until u stabilize..usually by 80mg. Then you increase as needed and if the doctor sees fit. They also have a test called a "PEAK AND TROUGH (sp?)" this tell the doctor how quickly your body is metabolizing the methadone. People with HepC always need a higher dose because their livers are bad and much of the methadone is just washed away (so to speak). Anyway, it wasn't until I reached 140mg that I was able to get through the day and night, I have now been 150mg for 8 years and began the VERY SLOW detox (could take a year or more)...but I know ME, just like you know you. Get your life together, take one step at a time and you can do it! There are MANY who don't agree with methadone, but everyone is different and each has to do what works for them!  Had it not been for methadone I would have NEVER gotten clean. I was a single mom, no family , didn't know a SOUL in this town and I could NOT lay sick..I had to care for her and put food on the table. So that was MY way.  I hope it works for you too..message me anytime with questions or if you just need support!  I MEAN THAT!  Hang in there kiddo!

[wolvey]

Thank you soooo much. I live in Los Angeles CA.
I think its just this clinic that I happened to go to first because it was the only closest clinic that I could get to in order to dose on time. It's called BAART clinic and the doctor there is real reluctant to give you higher doses. Maybe if I plea to him that my cravings and w.d.'s are still bad he might higher the dose. But I am sure the AEGIS clinic that I am going to on Tuesday will have the plan that you speak and have been on. I want to thank you again for your words and care. I feel so much more confident about this detox. After hearing your struggle I can def. get through this! You are so strong and been through alot! My heart goes out to you! And For the first time in my life I know what it feels like to WANT TO QUIT. I will def. take up your offer on messaging you whenever I need help! You and so many other people have been so kind and wise. I will not get through this without you guys! You guys are like my new family now! And if you need to vent about anything I am a good listener! Its the least I can do! Take care and wish me luck for tonight! Love you all! Thanks Godezzofchaos!

[godezzofchaos]

O u are so sweet, but I'm nothing special..just been there. Here's the thing though...I don't know about CA, but in most states clinics follow the guidelines mandated for their state. In other words, changing clinics might not be the issue if the state of CA only allows very low doses. Does that make sense?  For example, I know the state of RI only allows very LOW doses, while NY has some patients walking around 300mg.  While you are up tonight maybe you could google it and try to find out what the regs are in your state...knowledge is POWER!  Go in there knowing what you are talking about might help convince a reluctant doctor to see you are really wanting this to work!  There are many out there that don't fully understand methadone treatment and the benefits it can provide..so arn yourself!  I'm happy for you, and I'm happy that drugs like methadone exsist to help some of us take the FIRST STEP!  Methadone is only the first step to the rest of your life, my clinic has always stressed that the ultimate goal is to live without ANYTHING, but they know that it is an indiviualized process.  I sure hope CA is up to speed in the treatment of methadone patients. Let me know!  Keep in touch, I want to see you do this!!

[wolvey]

YAY! Thanks again! Knowledge is power! I am totally gonna do that...i can't sleep anyways! I will keep in touch and you WILL see me do this! Yipee!

[wolvey]

Okay I found out that CA regulations does permit temporary increases in dosages. A maximum of 180mg a day. Patients are also allowed to take home a 2 day supply of dosage after a successful two month dosing period. YAY! I am goin in tomorrow and letting the doctor know that I am still craving bad and w.d.ing bad too. I am gonna see if he can prescribe me 50 mg atleast so it can hold me for day and night. Today I  felt okay but started normal nausea shaking sickness by 5 this afternoon. I know i need to have the methadone metabolize first but I just want to be safe so I don't crave so hard I end up hooking up! We will see tomorrow.

[godezzofchaos]

Well that is good news, at least it seems CA understands that higher doses of methadone are needed to stabilize patients. After 140mg TN requires permission form the state, which many approve for (myself included) because in order for you to stabilize you HAVE to feel better and quit cravng..or it won't work!  I am proof of that. I have stayed on the exact same dose for 8 years..never increasing at all. Once you reach the level where you feel "NORMAL" from morning til night then you can begin to rebuild your life.  But you do have to increase in stages. Once you get to about 80 let your body adjust to that and see if that will hold you.  Like I said, it doesn't work if you never get stabilized, this is when people begin mixing other drugs with it...if it is truly working you will not craze AT ALL.  

I do want to warn you tho..methadone is great tool to get you started, but the only thing it does not do is help with the MENTAL aspect of being an addict, that is still there, so once you are stronger I strongly advise you to seek out the roots to your addiction and begin to conquer those demons one day at a time too. It has taken me many years to be able to be ready to begin my detox..do not let anyone decide for you..stay strong!  Getting take-homes will help ALOT.  I am fortunate as I only need to attend my clinic once every 28 days and the rest are take-homes...it was a long road to get to this point, I went everyday for a long time.  

You hang in there kiddo...you can do this. PLEASE BE CAREFUL DRIVING!  In the begining methadone makes many NOD and this happens ALOT when driving, so be responsible and if you know this is a problem for you have someone else drive ya!  K..gotta run to the office..will be thinking of you and wishing you the best!!

[Penelope14]

Going onto methadone is your choice, I feel methadone should only be given to people who have tried every other way and means of getting clean and who's lives are in serious jepordy, this also goes for sub to. To many people want to take methadone in order to prevent withdrawals, which I can understand as no one wants to feel sick, but the down side of withdrawal prevention is the fact that you havent gotton down to the real issue, your addiction is still their, only now it is covered up by a bandaid, so do make sure while your on methadone that you recieve aftercare, I recommend NA or AA. I have been on oxys, vicodin, percocet and at the end of my addicton I was on a high dose of methadone for 6 years, and 6 months ago I tapered off methadone, once the methadone bandaid was taken off I realized that I never really got clean at all, I still had all the issues that many addicts have, this is when I started to go to meetings & got down to the real issue, my addiction. I wish the best for you. Penelope

[wolvey]

Okay day 2! Kinda sucked that they did not let me get a higher dose. I am a first timer in methadone detox so they won't prescribe me anything higher than 30 mg. I have to be on maintenance for that. And from what I see, I most likely have to relapse for them to put me on maintenance which seems rediculous to me! I feel almost the same with a 30 mg dose. I know myself and feel like I need atleast 50 to hold me through the day and through the night. I don't know what to do. But hey maybe It's for a reason. I can live with this I think. It is just gonna be harder mentally. I can take the physical withdrawals now. 30 mg is barely enough to keep the sickness away and I think I can deal with the rest. I just have to go to AA or NA. Be strong and keep posting and answering on here. Thank you all for being here for me. I am gonna do this no matter what. This is not going to be easy and I knew that coming into detox. I am gonna prove to myself that I finally am gonna break free off drugs! Lets do this ****!!!

[godezzofchaos]

O OKAY..so I see, you have two different types of treatments there..maintenace and detox. I'm not sure if they do that here or not, actually I'm sure they will do it however you want. Wow, do you have to meet certain requirements to be maintenance?

I agree whole heartedly with you Penelope, that's exactly what I said in my previous post, that although methadone alleviates the physical trauma of withdrawls, you are still an addict and need to get to the root of the problem.  It's hard to admit that when you are on a stable dose and feel fine and function just like everyone else.  Methadone is great to begin the process...I don't look at it like bandaid AT ALL..just a way to help make the first step ..the hardest step. I think many people fail detox because the sickness becomes just too much, so methadone takes away that excuse and lets you begin to rebuild your life. (at least it did for me).

So what is the game plan Wolvey?  How long do you take the 30? And then what?  I've been thinking bout you..hang in there darlin..you can do it!

[mr.lucky66]

I've been on methadone clinics in LA and a few other states too. It can help you if you are really hard core and if you leave the "other drugs" and booze alone. let me say that againg,,METHADONE TX IS ONLY SUCCESSFULL IF YOU DON'T GET HIGH ON OTHER DRUGS, POT ETC. AND DON'T DRINK. You may need more meth but the doses they give these days are ridiculous. Most addicts don't need more than 80 mg-100 mg. to stabelize. Also don't become overly friendly with methadone clients. This caused me a lot of problems. all the best

[darkstalker]

Hey i'm back! Just woke up from a much needed nap! Okay the game plan is 21 days.
Thats the detox program I am in. I am gonna see how strong and comfortable I can make myself be with 30 mg a day. I think maybe day 5 or 6 I can begin tapering down?
I don't know. right now it is the cravings more than anything, so that is my main problem. So one day at a time, and keep thinking positive. Thank you Godezzofchaos for all your love! And thank you everyone else for you love too! I am going to get through this as long as I have great friends like you guys! Much love! Meow~! < Thats my cats saying thank you for helping me~! Hahaaa!

[mr.lucky66]

I hate to tell you but I've never seen this Ca. methadone detoxes work before. Most methadone programs in Ca. have them but most go back to dope or stay on meth. I can give you a lot of advise on Methadone and it can help if used correctly. all the best

[godezzofchaos]

Wow, sounds like MR.LUCKY66 has had the same success as me!  I 1000000% agree with you that methadone ONLY WORKS if you quit everything else!  I have had GREAT success with it, ut I have done EXACTLY what I am suppose to.  I have been on 150mg for the past 8 years and I am very successful and have a fullfilled life. MR.LUCKY you are also spot on when you say STAY AWAY from the others at the clinic!  This is not a social event..get in and get out, and don't tell people that you are on a clinic OR WHERE you go (the first time they get pissed at you, they call the clinic on ya!). I don't know anything about the detox program as I am on maintanence, but I do know that if you do not take a high enough dose and don't stabilize you are less likely to stick with it and stop using EVERYTHING.  Anyway, it was nice to read from someone something positive about it...btw, kinda confused..DARKSTALKER  I'm guessing you are WOLVEY?  You can't change names like that on me..I confuse easily!!!  LOL

[godezzofchaos]

Hey MrLUCKY..just saw you are from Melbourne FL.,,I moved to TN from COCOA!! COOL!!

[RANDO88]

After 5 attempts at methadone clinics & numerous relapses, I feel SUBOXONE  is far superior, even though the cost is high.