if anyone out there can help me im desperate.
i have been with my boyfriend for 6 months now and we are inlove, we always talk about our future together and were both 18. when we first met by a mutual friend she told me he used to be really bad and do some drugs. i took the chance and the first couple of months hes been amazing never high, or weird. there were once or twich a month he would act a little different, he then told me that we was taking oxycodone. he got it from his dad because his father is dying of cancer. i believed him and helped hi stop and he did. he has been good for about a month now but recently he started sellng heroin and cocaine. I DO NOT APPROVE OF THIS AT ALL. I kept telling him to stop and am doiong everything i can. then i see hes starting to get high again, in a discription his high is - small pupils, itching, vomiting, dipping out, acting very silly, not remembering things, no sex drive and sweating. he goes upstairs for a about two minutes, then he comes down and hes high. i asked him numerous times if it was heroin he was doing and he says no and that hes snorting percocets. then one day when he was selling i round a unused syringe in his bag. he told me it was for his friend. This is killing me i find myself worrying and not sleeping over this. it is crazy to think that i dont know what my own boyfriend is consuming, please somebody answer my questions. is it percocets? is it heroin? if he loves me then why would he lie to me? will he ever stop?
Hello. Sounds like to me he is doing all of them. If he's selling heroin. He is doing it. No question about it. Lying is the number one defense we addicts learn. Nodding off or "dipping out" is a total sign of heroin use. You shouldn't aprove of it and if he keeps lying and he's not willing to change, you should get out while you can. You both are so young. He can only fix himself. You can't fix him. I would be worried your feelings for him could get you trapped in drug use and addiction with him. Just something for you to think about. From what you mentioned about him. Seems there is alot going on about him that you don't know. He needs help, professional help. So sorrry..but you are so young..don't let this trap you.
I don't know enough about heroin but I heard the high is longer and you nod in and out. Percocet high, snorting or not is usually a feel good chatty good mood high ..unless you take too much ..then you just want to lay down,,, (my experience)
I know you love him by the way you talk. He doesn't NOT love you. Once addiction has set it consumes a person. Hopefully he is not at a point where he cannot stop.
I'm not going to predict the worst.
Let him know how you feel. (preferrably when he's straight). Let him know verbally and maybe even a letter so he can re-read it....Be supportive if he wants to quit. If he does , send him here..we will help all we can.....
thank you toboth of you we have so much together and i would hate to leave him i cant fathom it and everythign is hitting me so hard right now. money, drugs cancer its insane i need anyone to help i just dont know what to do anymore i might need professional help aswell. somthing deep in my gut is telling me its heroin and he lies but im not stupid, i think a letter is the best thing to do, thank you.
I don't want to seem too pessimistic but if you stay in your present situation something really bad is going to happen to you. Believe me it is no fun when the cops kick your door down and hold a gun to your head while they tear your place apart. Or when your BF's "clients" come over and hold a gun to your head while they steal all the dope and money. Or maybe something even worse, like watching him overdose or seeing him get sent to prison.
In my experience, he won't stop until after the really bad thing happens. Some people have to experience it more than once before they realize they need to stop getting high. Do you really believe that the syringe you found was for his friend?
Ask yourself if this is what you always thought love should be like. Did you imagine it as you described? A guy with no sex drive that lies to you? Is that love?
I think you should put yourself first and give him an ultimatum. Either he goes to rehab and gets sober or else you are going to leave. I am sorry for your present situation but I honestly think you can't help him by yourself. He needs professional help, but first he has to want to stop using.
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