heroin..

[delirious11]

so i've been an addict since i was 13, not anything serious until i was 17, and now i'm on my longest run of heroin and cocaine for over a year straight and have no idea why its been so hard to quit this time. in the past before i became a mother (i'm 22 and have a 2 yearold) i would quit cold turkey and suffer for a week. now i cant stand going 5 hours without almost committing suicide.. its to the point where i've lost my daughter to cps (temporarily) and in order to get her back i have to get clean within 4 months. i'm so scared i'm going to lose her for sure since i want to quit so bad but the pain is 10 times worse every time i get sick. i use about a half gram a day plus the same amount of coke with it (i shoot speedball) so i can imagine if i go any longer and my usage increases the w/d will only be worse.. i've been to detox twice already and subutex hasn't worked for me nor has the methadone clinic.. other than cold turkey, does anyone have any suggestions that would allow me to mask the w/d s and help me from ending the suffering the cowardly way? (don't worry i'm not really suicidal.. just sick of this never ending cycle..) i know all u addicts there know what its like so give me some feedback that i can stand! thanks..

[salsinator]

There are medically assisted detox programs out there, but some are quite expensive, but they work to keep with suffering from withdrawal to a minimum.  I agree with some of the other posts here, some kind of rehab would probably be your best option.  Not only are you killing yourself by doing very dangerous speedballs, but I cannot imagine the hurt from losing a child.  Please get some professional help so you don't have to go through this alone.

[mr.lucky66]

The last 2 posters make a lot of sense. There isn't always a drug solution to drug addiction . Sometimes people are better served by a CT with just some over the counter meds and some addicts really need something.  A lot people here seem like there are vicodin addicts and really don't suffer near the level of WD as a dope user and can get by with nothing. Different people can handle WD in different ways but being young helps a lot.There are other ways besides just straight sub or methadone but they cost$ . all the best

[daisy699]

This is a tough one,but like stated above DOABLE! I am 73 days clean today off of heroin and benzos so I know your fear of wd. Get your frame of mind back to when you were pregnant and stopped ct,in a sense you do need to get clean for your baby so think of it as your pregnant and absolutely cannot do drugs!!! I went to an inpatient rehab with very minimal methadone over a period of 4 days to wd. I also used a bit more than your habit and I did not suffer as bad as I had imagined!! I think the fear of wd keeps alot of us using and it's not that bad!! alot of it is truly mental and we freak ourselves out. If you have 4 mos to get it together I would consider another rehab,give it all that you got for your child!!!Good luck keep posting

[10356]

Hello and welcome to the forum.. I'm very sorry to read of the loss of your little one to cps due to your Heroin addiction.. I understand when you say nothing works except ct as a addict I would not be able to use a maintenance drug as I know I would also abuse that.. so you are left with wd.. a gram a day is not so bad and 1/2 of that is coke.. as you probably know stopping the coke really sends us into a frenzy of explosive emotions.. anger and what not. recognizing what is going on helps.. This is a very doable amount to wd from.. Yes there are things that you can do.. not to mask the wd I do not think that is possible but to ease them and make them bearable.. Hot showers/baths as often as you can valerian root for anxiety ensure drinks for protein gator aid to replace electrolytes and a product called hyland restful leg for the rls or tonic water.. Imodium a lot of determination and time.. You can do this.. you need to do this.. pick up some AA or NA meetings.. break the rig and drop friends.. You have a lot riding on getting clean so do not let fear stop you.. Keep reading the forum and reach out for support You can pick up a lot of tips on how to go about ct.. many will help you through the roughest part.. You need to get into the mind set that nothing will stop you from achieving your goal.. Your daughter is worth the suffering for 7 to 10 days as you are.. the worst will be lack of sleep in my opinion.. now is the perfect opportunity to face your demons and get this behind you.. Counseling as to why you picked up at such a early age would also be very beneficial. I have found this true for myself.. You have only 4 months to pull this all together.. No time like the present.. I do not mean this to sound harsh just that you have a lot riding on you getting clean.. do not let fear of being dope sick stop you ok.. I wish you well on your journey.. lesa

[grievingwidow]

With the heavy addiction that you have and considering it started at such a young age, I would think that a very long stay at a rehab facility may be your only option if you truly want to get clean and stay that way for good which YOU HAVE TO DO for the sake of your child.  I am surprised that methadone did not work for you, is it just because you did not the "high"?  I mean, it stopped your withdrawals didn't it?  

[kally1]

Try tramadol. It will help I have had friends detox from oc's and heroin with it. It's not a miracle but it breaks down into morphine in the body.  

[mtgoat911]

he sorry i missed this post if your still around please send me an email, we have several people here including myself who have detoxed off herion, i will check back with you tommorow