how you changed

I have seen how my husband is so different than the man I met less than 10 yrs ago. Made me wonder if those changes are pretty much the same with all addicts, generally speaking.
Other than the obvious ways such as lying to cover up your use and physical ways like how did your drug use change you? Did you realize that you were different? Did you deny to yourself or others that you had changed at all or blame changes on other things such as age, health, etc?

[gizzy32]

My drug use caused me to lose hope and something happens when you give up on life. I just stopped caring and that is so out of character for me. From that came anger, depression, and a complete lifestlyle change. I knew I had changed, but i convinced myself i could change back while using, but that was impossible. I was NOT the person I really am on drugs, it messes with the head and at the time most of us don't realize how bad it is until after we quit. The good news is with abstinence and good recovery plan, we do heal and change back to who we really are. Interesting post.

[kim715]

I knew I was different,but I was in so much denial when I was using. Like Gizzy said I too was NOT the person that I really am when I was using.Addiction doesn't define the person we truly are.I look back now and even I find it hard to believe that I did some of the things I did.Although I know I did them, even now sometimes the reality of it all is still hard to swallow.I've got over a year clean now and I'm back to being the 'real me' again.,24/7.I was a liar,cheater,manipulator and I showed no common sense.With all the drugs I would put in my body sometimes in a 24 hour period,I'm surprised I'm not dead and with all the ways I went about getting the drugs it's a miracle I'm not in prison.I blamed my drug use along with the changes of my personality on anything and anyone I could,except me of course.When I started blaming me thats when I had to take a cold hard look in the mirror and thats when I started making changes for the better and steps towards recovery.

[dominosarah]

Plain and simple.......I blamed EVERYTHING on everyone else.......not anymore......now i am responsible for me.