Aa
i really need help
hey guys i just joined this board i help to get great help i about 48 hours ago stopped taking hydrocodone oxycotin and percs not all at once but i average about 8-10 blue watson 5 40s every 5-6 hours , everyday for about 18 months , i realised today that i cant beat the problems im having untill i beat the main one which is the evil pills that killed me , i dont work anymore im 22 years old i lay around on pills all day and play concerts at night im in a very large rock band that i cant disclose because people would be writing it somewhere . but i love my father more then anyone in the world and my addiction is so bad that i consistintly have stolen money from him , i have searched friends medicine cabinets and tried to find free hydros all the time , i was doing ok today on my 2nd day and my legs hurt so bad on the top of them my arms are not as bad , but i took like 5 adderall 20 mg today with some friends , i can control myself good with like weed beer even cocaine i stopped fine no withdrawl i never was majorly into anything like i am now , these things are goin to make me end up dead cause of the deppression alone , i cry about not being anyone who i think i should be please someone any advice for me to get through this i have no medical so i cant go to a rehab , my friends and family ignore it even after i tell them they just say clean ur life up or get out , there so blunt , it kills me everyday. is there anything i can do to take the pain away atleast !!! and also can i take the adderall for withdrawling ? i feel it helped . Thank you to anyone who will try and help me , my carrerr and my family is on the line and i just turned 22... thanks guys and gals
Hi. I am addicted to sleeping pills ( zimovane and flurazupam). I also have developed a dependency on alcohol and have been smoking since I was 14. I have indulged reacreationally in illegal drugs in my twenties but that has stopped now. It all started with an abusive relationship about 4 years ago and has spun out of control. The truth is I would rather be asleep than be awake. I have stopped several times and gone through withdrawal. Tommorrow I have decided to got to NA and really go for clean. Today, I took four flurazupans and a bottle of wine. I am scaring myself. I want to stop but I just feel so alone. Can anyone offer me advice?
im sorry 4 responding so late after u posted this but i just seen 4 1st time,and i read and had 2 talk 2 u.my pilll habit is as bad/worse thn yours and i say started suboxone 3 days ago and for the 1st time since i cant remember,i have glimmer of hope.this addiction we have is crippeling and will ruin the best people.my grandad and parents r my world and i would never betray them but when i was pill sick,i stolw their pills and lied 2 get money.all the shame on top of the addiction eats me up.this life we have is miserable and it has 2 eventually get better if we try.noone deserves this life.i wouldnt wish pill addiction on my worst enemy.stay strong and although i dont know u,id like 2 b here 4 u
Welcome to the forum.....
I was much younger than you when I started on your path with even stronger drugs than your taking.....
At age four I was begging God for his help with personal emotional problems that I was having at home and all I ever got was his voice mail.....
I begged his help for many years afterwards and still all I got was his voice mail with no call backs....
Maybe you take drugs like millions of people do......
The pleasure of a kiss, a bowl of favorite ice cream, and a compliment may all be related to a rise in dopamine levels in the normal person's brain. Drugs of abuse also boost dopamine levels. When a person takes a hit of crack cocaine -- or a drag on a cigarette -- the drugs cause a spike in dopamine levels in the brain, and a rush of euphoria, or pleasure. While it's not the only chemical involved in drug abuse, experts have come to believe that dopamine is the crucial one.
Or some like me take it to escape the pain of their reality, to run to a safe place of euphoria....so the pain will go away.....
What ever your reason you know in your heart what your doing the real question is the courage to stand up to addiction.......
Were all seduced by drugs there a lot of fun in the beginning but as time passes and addiction takes over the fun now becomes very hard work and often deviant and criminal.....
Your 22 yrs old and your a grown man if I may be so bold to tell you honesty between a father and son is a rough business at times especially in these types of conversation....I believe even with my father he hated my addiction so bad that he could not differentiate me with my addiction......he looked at them as one so we were never able even after his death of cancer at age 75 ever repair the damage between us......
Hopefully your father is different than mine and if you go to him for help he might get mad but still do the right thing and as a father help his son....this is very personal with me and I want you to know I understand this much more than you will ever imagine......
Go to him and get into an inpatient detox its only five days of your young life....
Then go directly into an inpatient drug rehab.....
Recovery is very difficult and very hard work....do you have the fight with in you to be totally honest and get to recovery......
Your in a very scary place I've been there I pray that your father loves you dearly as his son and only wants the best for you....your 22 so your young enough to not have burned that bridge to the ground yet......
Young man the ball is in your court its time for you to either sit there and feel sorry for yourself keep sitting home and doing pills or going into every medicine cabinet at every house you visit or you can go to your father and look him in the eyes and tell the truth..........
Good luck, this will take tremendous courage on your part and your addiction will try very hard to stop you, dont' let it.......
Good luck..........
I was much younger than you when I started on your path with even stronger drugs than your taking.....
At age four I was begging God for his help with personal emotional problems that I was having at home and all I ever got was his voice mail.....
I begged his help for many years afterwards and still all I got was his voice mail with no call backs....
Maybe you take drugs like millions of people do......
The pleasure of a kiss, a bowl of favorite ice cream, and a compliment may all be related to a rise in dopamine levels in the normal person's brain. Drugs of abuse also boost dopamine levels. When a person takes a hit of crack cocaine -- or a drag on a cigarette -- the drugs cause a spike in dopamine levels in the brain, and a rush of euphoria, or pleasure. While it's not the only chemical involved in drug abuse, experts have come to believe that dopamine is the crucial one.
Or some like me take it to escape the pain of their reality, to run to a safe place of euphoria....so the pain will go away.....
What ever your reason you know in your heart what your doing the real question is the courage to stand up to addiction.......
Were all seduced by drugs there a lot of fun in the beginning but as time passes and addiction takes over the fun now becomes very hard work and often deviant and criminal.....
Your 22 yrs old and your a grown man if I may be so bold to tell you honesty between a father and son is a rough business at times especially in these types of conversation....I believe even with my father he hated my addiction so bad that he could not differentiate me with my addiction......he looked at them as one so we were never able even after his death of cancer at age 75 ever repair the damage between us......
Hopefully your father is different than mine and if you go to him for help he might get mad but still do the right thing and as a father help his son....this is very personal with me and I want you to know I understand this much more than you will ever imagine......
Go to him and get into an inpatient detox its only five days of your young life....
Then go directly into an inpatient drug rehab.....
Recovery is very difficult and very hard work....do you have the fight with in you to be totally honest and get to recovery......
Your in a very scary place I've been there I pray that your father loves you dearly as his son and only wants the best for you....your 22 so your young enough to not have burned that bridge to the ground yet......
Young man the ball is in your court its time for you to either sit there and feel sorry for yourself keep sitting home and doing pills or going into every medicine cabinet at every house you visit or you can go to your father and look him in the eyes and tell the truth..........
Good luck, this will take tremendous courage on your part and your addiction will try very hard to stop you, dont' let it.......
Good luck..........
hi sweetie...
i am not an addict, but i have a son very close to your age who is. he will be 21 in september and is a recovering crack addict...19 months. i know the emotional pain you are feeling...but i do not personally know the physical pain.
i have been here since february and i know that there are many things you can do to help with the w/d's...but i do not feel qualifed to list these...dont want to tell you the wrong thing. i do feel safe in saying though that taking adderall is probably NOT a good thing.
it is still a "wee bit early" for some of the ppl here...so hang with us and you will get the help you need soon. i can tell you that there is not a "one stop cure all" for what you are experiencing...so you are going to have to go through the pain for a few days. but the end result will be so worth it...your life is worth it.
right now...at this moment...you need to just concentrate on yourself. what you have done to others...specifically your father...can be put on the backburner for a while. there will be plenty of time for you to make amends to him and i am sure that his love will help him understand and forgive you. so put those guilty feelings aside and lets just concentrate on you right now, ok?
just a question...is it possible for you to enter an inpatient rehab? of course this would mean that you would have to probably admit to your family that you have a problem first.
huggs,
kim
i am not an addict, but i have a son very close to your age who is. he will be 21 in september and is a recovering crack addict...19 months. i know the emotional pain you are feeling...but i do not personally know the physical pain.
i have been here since february and i know that there are many things you can do to help with the w/d's...but i do not feel qualifed to list these...dont want to tell you the wrong thing. i do feel safe in saying though that taking adderall is probably NOT a good thing.
it is still a "wee bit early" for some of the ppl here...so hang with us and you will get the help you need soon. i can tell you that there is not a "one stop cure all" for what you are experiencing...so you are going to have to go through the pain for a few days. but the end result will be so worth it...your life is worth it.
right now...at this moment...you need to just concentrate on yourself. what you have done to others...specifically your father...can be put on the backburner for a while. there will be plenty of time for you to make amends to him and i am sure that his love will help him understand and forgive you. so put those guilty feelings aside and lets just concentrate on you right now, ok?
just a question...is it possible for you to enter an inpatient rehab? of course this would mean that you would have to probably admit to your family that you have a problem first.
huggs,
kim
Hey All, quickie about me....4-80mg oxycontin 4-40 mg oxycontin plus some 15 mg oxycontin for break through per DAY! (on average day for the last two years). Stopped last week and spent one week going through the ususal hell. Sure, I can quit, I do it all the time when I run out! This time I stopped on my own and even flushed my supply away. Can you believe that? The reason, I was sick and tired of NEEDING that ****, and tired of my wife calling me an addict and also just wanted to see if I still really needed the oxy. And I guess, most importantly, wanted to prove to MYSELF, that I could stop. I was hurt in an accident at work over two years ago, and still have severe pain from it, which it will never go away. I have found several ways to stop the pain and suffering from opiate withdrawl. One way, and the best in my opinion is to go to a Dr and tell them about your "problem". I have found that many will help you if you are up front with them. I asked them for methdone. Depending upon your intake, taking the Meth will ease your pain and suffering. For me, day one: morning 40 mg noon 10 evening 40 mg. This for two days. Day three: 20 mg morning, noon 5 mg evening 20 mg. This for two days. Day five 10 mg morning no noon dose evening 10 mg. This for the remainder of the seven days. You still will suffer with the usual lack of sleep, watering eyes, legs that just hurt and feel like lead. You will also not want to talk to anyone with your voice or go outside. Try to keep the room dark for the first week and plan on doing nothing. After the first week, start going outside in the sun and doing the things that you like to do. Stay away from your old triggers or things that make you want to use....Keep posting on this board! Many of you may not agree with this method, but, it works for ME, plus, I had a Doc that was willing to help me. Option number two....COLD TURKEY! I have done this before and really think it is the most difficult thing a person can do in their life! How? My way as follows....PLAN AHEAD....Get some anti-diarrea medication from your local drug store, along with at least a case of gatoraid or OJ. Also some type of food that is bland and can be prepared in the microwave or just eaten out of the rapper. Enough for a week or two. Pick your withdrawl day and if you can, make it so you do not have to do anything much at least for the first 4 days..... OK, day one, you stop your drug of choice....Hmmm, you do not feel that bad the first day, lets say you stopped the night before.....Drink much of your fluids and eat as much as you can....Go to bed at 8 or 9 pm....You will wake up sometime in the middle of the night or early morning feeling like ****, making **** in the toilet every hour or so....It is a little over 24 hours since your last dose. Flop about in your bed or lay on the floor and watch tv, or try to sleep till the morning. Day two morning....You will not feel like eating or drinking (all of this has been my experience by going cold turkey by the way). You will sweat and tremble, your stomach will be in knots, nose and eyes running, hard to breath and you will feel like you have the worst flu you have ever had. Try to drink some gator or OJ. as often as you can. More than likely, you will be pooping thin foam or having stomach cramps very often. Start taking your anti diareah meds at the onset of the thins. The feeling of just wanting to lay on the floor and not ever getting comfortable lasts for about three days after the first 24 hours! For me, I find it hard to eat for about three or four days! Just KEEP HYDRATED by drinking fluids. This is the most important thing. After four days of pure missery that involves sweats, chills, vomiting (sometimes) crapping out your guts, wet eyes, running nose, leg pains, poor or no sleep, no appetite not wanting to speak or see anyone you WILL start to feel better!!! Yes, it does stop. You will be able to eat a little, you will see the light at the end of the tunnel. Each day after day four should get a bit better, and after day seven or so, you will be able to function and actually feel like a human and not a car wreck victom. Your pain from what ever the reason you are taking the meds will still be present, but you will not feel like you are dying any more. That is if you are taking the meds because of an injury like I am. That is the he-man method for getting off of the evil but necessary in many situations opiates. Again, this is how I did it in the past. I tried the vitamin thing and it did not do a thing for me. I have also heard that if you can get some sleeping meds during the process, that this can help. The main thing is to decide if you want to stop the meds, because if you are not stopping for YOU, you will not succeed. If you take meds that are prescribed and you just take more than you are supposed to, dont do it....take them as prescribed by the doc, or not at all! Or, if you want, give your body a break for a week or two, or a month to check and see if your body really needs the meds. I hope this helps and if it does, I will feel good....Take care....
I've only been here a few days, I am working on day 5. It gets better, I know you feel like **** now but hang in there.
This is a good board with good advice so stick around.
This is a good board with good advice so stick around.
I am right there with you. i was taking 30 vicodens a day today is my first day with-out my meds i am going cold turkey only because my husband thru out my pills by accident. but hey i hear withdrawl will not kill you so that was comforting for me.
good luck and there is oldtimers hear who have great advice!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
it also helped to just read past post too.
good luck you can do it
good luck and there is oldtimers hear who have great advice!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
it also helped to just read past post too.
good luck you can do it
There are so many ways to quit. Rancid....the adderall is definately not a great idea. You are just self medicating and replacing one for another. Unfortunaltely we have to go through some discomfort to get us back to where we need to be! Can you go to a DR. to help you detox? C/T is an option, you feel like you have the flu for several days and the mental part is tough but it is worth it. Tapering is also an option but you need a lot of self control to do this. Someone here that has successfully tapered can give you a schedule but you have to decide if you are able to do this. There is subuxone which is a narcotic antagonist I believe....some have also been successful with this route but I don't know how realistic this is for you if you don't have ins. Methadone has been used, but again, the w/d from that I have heard from many here is very difficult so the replacement route really needs to be done under the supervision of a Dr.
You are so young and have so much to look forward to, don't let these drugs take you down! Many are here to help you! LIZZIELOU has a lot of experience seeing the havoc this wreaks on your life and the lives of those who care for you! I'm sure many others will post with suggestions so keep posting here and you will get lots of encouragement and support!
Marcie
You are so young and have so much to look forward to, don't let these drugs take you down! Many are here to help you! LIZZIELOU has a lot of experience seeing the havoc this wreaks on your life and the lives of those who care for you! I'm sure many others will post with suggestions so keep posting here and you will get lots of encouragement and support!
Marcie
i would like to thank everyone that has been so nice to help me out !!! its goin on about 50 hours and its starting to really hurt inside my legs at the top it feels like a knife is stabbing them , ive been taking adderall bc i dont think about it as much but i am goin to the hospital in about 40 min with my room mate to see if i can get medicine to help the withdrawls , ive never my whole life been addicted to anything as much as a lil pill somenights i would wake up at 4 am and i was so pumped to take 10 blue watsons it was like it had a holiday i dont even get up to go to a job at that time but for the pills i loved the feeling i loved my problems bein numb , but now i look around and i feel like ive lost my college money my rent money my dads rent money and anything i had to do i did so i would never withdrawl , like i said this is close to 2 years everyday taking massive amounts of tabs , someday if no tabs were for sale if buy oxycodone 40 mg footballs blow 6-7 of them in one day and beg my dealer for my tabs ! its getting hard all !! its getting hard
i know im to young for this i dont even wana do them anymore its to the point its causing between 50 to 100 dollars of eating loer tabs every 5 hours , ive taking money from my father who is the greatest man alive to me , he never understood where the money was goin i hide my addiciton so well that people cant tell unless they see me eating the tabs , right now my legs are hurting so bad it feels like someones punching them , is there any medicine i can take so i can feel better , is adderall a safe withdrawl medicine or will it affect me more ? im trying to find out what i should do this very second i can not sleep or eat , im almost embarassed of this its silly over pills . but now i have to stop no matter what for everyone around me the things ive done will never be taking back but if i start fresh now atleast it was only 18 months of my life and i know never to do anything like this again , Day 1 18 months ago - drink 8 beers take 2 7.5 , day 45 drink 10 beers eat 3-4 10's loer tabs every 6 hours , 18 months later day ??? my life is upside down , no money, no gf , friends dont wana be around me cause of it , and all over a lil pill i just gotta stop this pain
pills...depression...up...down...medicate...feeling good...crashing...pain...pills...depression...up...down...medicate...feeling good...crashing...pain
do you see the cycle? so many ppl self medicate for the depression they are feeling...hoping to numb the sadness...when in reality, they are only adding to the depression...making it worse. hence the need to medicate.
you are only 22 years old and already you are killing yourself...slowly...but killing yourself...your body...your mind...your life. while in full blown addiction your mind is unable to fully process what you are truly doing to yourself.
you can stop this cycle...it is possible. are you ready to committ to this? if you are, you have come to a wonderful place for help. there are many options you have to get through this and some of the most supportive, informative, and all-giving ppl...addicts just like you...are here to help you. there are ppl here who are wanting to quit...deep into withdrawals...and many with significant clean time. if you will stay with us...they can help you get through this.
what do you think?
huggs,
kim
do you see the cycle? so many ppl self medicate for the depression they are feeling...hoping to numb the sadness...when in reality, they are only adding to the depression...making it worse. hence the need to medicate.
you are only 22 years old and already you are killing yourself...slowly...but killing yourself...your body...your mind...your life. while in full blown addiction your mind is unable to fully process what you are truly doing to yourself.
you can stop this cycle...it is possible. are you ready to committ to this? if you are, you have come to a wonderful place for help. there are many options you have to get through this and some of the most supportive, informative, and all-giving ppl...addicts just like you...are here to help you. there are ppl here who are wanting to quit...deep into withdrawals...and many with significant clean time. if you will stay with us...they can help you get through this.
what do you think?
huggs,
kim
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