idealism and addiction

[penny1974]

So I have been thinking about those two little words on my medical chart. First let me say I'm so sorry if I word anything wrong. I'm not saying anything to be hurtful or judgmental. Im not the best at discribing sometimes. I'm a lover not a fighter. Lol
OK so I have accepted those words and thanks to you guys I understand it doesn't define me as a person.  I admit that I was in the mind set of how can I be an addict. That was bad and dirty and just bad. I lived a pretty sucluded child hood. Not exposed to much hardship or bad stuff. So I was a little nieve as a young adult sometimes still am. But  the thing I think is sad is the idealism ( not sure if that's the right word) that society has on addiction or a drug addict or any addiction. In the beginning I thought of an addict as (like in the movies) so yes when I saw those two words and panicked. Later though I looked again after lots of thoughts and realized it can happen to any one and it happened to me. We don't live in the movies but any situation isn't much different. An addict is just an addict. Society scares me. The way people judge. I work hard to not judge people but I'm not perfect and I know I have. Then I remind my self we are all human. I just wish there was more education on addiction and that people had a better understanding of the realty vs just what they imagine it to be. Sorry this is long and hope it makes since. I kinda rambled.  

[penny1974]

I have to tell every one thank you for the support. It has been a big help. And coming here to vent and get insure has been a godsend. I wouldn't be were I am today if I wouldn't have joined and learned. I know I would still be getting my script and living day to day taking pills to cope and who knows we're that would have lead. I don't want to know what my rock bottom looks like and just glad to be doing this now and not later. Thank you all. Trully, From the bottom of my heart.  ;)

[penny1974]

That is so good to hear.  Thanks for the info.

[Amroke]

Well it appears your wish may be coming true! We are starting to finally address the opiate addiction problem in this country now. I don't know if you've noticed but it's being reported on quite frequently in the MSM as of late. They are looking for a whole new approach and they're even doing stories on the types of people that get addicted. There's all different types but I'm willing to bet none are as horrible as on those tv shows or movies. They are exposing the reality of it. That it is your neighbor, PTA mom, your nurse, mom, dad, brother, sister etc. Putting a face to this new wave of addiction will change the way people view addicts historically. I'm so excited to see that the country is making headway with this. It's destroyed so many lives including my own at one point. Hang in there!

[VICourageous]

Penny. I do agree with everyone here, but I have to say something that kind of worked for me.
I picked up some Videos and alot of paper work regarding this Disease.
Could care less about anybody else not understanding it but my Family.
My Hub & Mom watched a few Videos and some of my Friends got some paper work on this. One thing was that it gave my Hub a understanding about all of this that goes on in the Brain. He in the Long Run kept supporting me as time went on & on and I was going to give up. He is the one who would remind me about the Brain and what it would do if I just gave in one more time. He was the one that kept telling or reminding me what the Drs said about how long it would take for my Brain to balance back and feel somewhat normal again..Never will I be 100% normal because I have this disease and normal to me was being High.
I do wish you the Best and just keep on doing what you know is right now.
AND if they do not Like it they can take a nice big Jump in the Lake..It is YOUR Life not theirs!!!
PS..Just remember everybody has some kind of skeleton hidden in the closet that needs to be set free so we can move on..lol

[kyle505]

Penny - what I've learned, and some it was a very hard lesson, was that those who have a problem with someone being an addict, disabled, having a different skin color - you name it - really aren't worth your time, so don't bother with them.
K

[penny1974]

Thanks for the posts. I think that's what I was also meaning which was I do get it and am finally okay with it. I just wish others were to and I do look forward to moving forward to being done. I welcome it and already feeling free of many things :)

[takingmylifeback2014]

I understood what you meant, and I was totally kidding lol ... I think Penny will get it!

[VICourageous]

Addict is only a Word!!
However Addiction is a Disease. Lots of people do not understand this Yet.
Just like when you say the word Cancer. You can get all kinds of different reactions from that Word.
Heck, since I have been on this Earth they have turned into throwing the Addict in a corner to where they know they need help now.
I have to agree with Kyle on this one..If you keep trying to over analyze all of this it is going to drive you crazy. I was doing that a bit way back when and the Dr told me that it does not matter why!!! Just Move on and keep pushing forward and keep one foot in front of the other. BUT...We do have to have some kind of Support..Doing this with me, myself, and I, gets us in trouble. Just keep your head up and walk with a smile.
Us Addicts are NOT Weak..WE are Strong!!! And we get Stronger & Stronger as TIME goes bye, but always on Guard!
Bless

[gnarly_1]

Hi Penny   first off addiction is a disease for witch there is no know cure... however it can be arrested and then recovery is possible.. know knowing this it takes the sham or sting out of it  like any other disease you need to treat it for addicts treatment is aftercare that comes in many forms a substance abuse counselor or a physicist that specialize in addiction or my favorite N/A,  it is free and if your willing to make a few changes you can live a normal and rewording life it is up to you  give N/A a try  I tryed all the others but inevitable I failed  N/A has given me back my life I have real friends that are addicts also the difference is we dont pick up if your like most addicts 1 is to many and 1000 is never enough please give it the college try go to 3 meetings when your comfortable speak no one will ask you to do anything  your a member when you say you are this will be life changing for you because one addict helping another addict is without parallel  I wish you all the luck in the world with your recovery but it will be up to you to do the next right thing......................................Gnarly.............................................

[kyle505]

After I wrote that I re read it and wondered how it would appear. I meant to show that addiction does not distinguish between hard working people and those living, for whatever reason, on the streets, as is the general public's common view of addicts.
And I've been happily married for over 33 years:) Thanks for the nice comment. Hope penny gets it.
K

[takingmylifeback2014]

Wow Kyle are you single? LMAO TOTALLY KIDDING!!!!
Good for you well done Sir you deserve it all ....

[onthefence]

there are no saints without a past, and no sinners with out a future.

[kyle505]

I own my own business. I live in a two million dollar house. I am putting three kids through college - all at the same time. I have two new cars and (my pride and joy) a new Harley Davidson Dyna.
I buy what I want to, go where I want to, and work when I want to.
Am I an addict - you betcha.  Have I been an addict for years and years and years? You betcha. Do the people who really mean something to me, who know that I'm an addict, care? Nope, not one little bitty bit.
You need to stop dwelling on this; granted, it's new and upsetting and all, but the only thing that means anything is where you go from here.
K

[jugglin]

"sober addicts have a high percent of awesomeness"...I love it!  I have met so many awesome folks here as well as AA. From one sober addict to another - ya'll are awesome.  

[nonights]

I love this weaver. Best part is now so far. But look out cause here you come. Better and better!

[weaver71]

Educating the public about drugs has become a large part of my recovery and paying it forward. I overcame my judgement of myself by being part of the solution rather than the part of the problem. Recovering addicts are real genuine, humble, generous, caring, loving people, perhaps a notch above those who never been humbled and reached out for help as addicts have to. Not sure the connection, but sober addicts have a high percent of awesomeness. Glad you are okay with your addiction, that makes me feel you are okay with mine. We have this thing. It has just kept getting better for me, this is the best part of my life so far, no exaggeration.