methadone clinic

[tinabe40]

i have been on lortab for over 8 years. i am prescribed it by my doctor however my tolerance level is so high i am buying so much off the streets we are gonna go broke. We have a methadone clinic about 40 minutes away, and I thought it would be better to use it to get off the lortab, which by the way, I have been taking between 30-50 pills a day, 10 mg..depending on what i can find and afford. I know it's alot, but now I am scared of the methadone program too. It seems it may be worse to kick later than weening myself off the tabs, but now I'm not strong enough to do that either. I have chronic back pain, and to tell the truth life ***** right now. God, I don't know what to do...try the clinic tomorrow or not. Here they offer methadone or suboxone, have to go daily, and one is $125 weekly, the other is $100. Either of those choices beat the hundreds I'm spending now. Plz help.

[tinabe40]

Thanks for the comments. I feel like crap and my back wont give up...

[freshstart01]

U can do it. I'm on day 13, yesterday I had a meltdown. But today not so bad. I took 10 s too. Yes, I'm fighting the demons..... Have not caved! Nor will you. Do it for yourself and kids and family. That's my motivation

[tinabe40]

well, im trying, but moving around is easier said than done when ur back feels like its breaking. Actually, I just want to sleep. Which I am getting ready to do in just a bit. I can walk some but not far...the pinched nerve in my back is not something that allows the right side of my body to feel good. I feel as if I have a screwdriver in my hip at times. I woke up crying my eyes out with back pain this morning. Ive been taking vits, potassium, gatorade, energy drinks, 800mg IB, and nothing is helping with pain or energy. Im trying....I'll keep trying.

[gnarly_1]

I agree with at the beach you need to move around as much as possible also go to walmart and pick up whey proten shakes it will give your body the building blocks to heal your brain
lots of amino acids and vitamins along with the protein recovery is a slow process but each day you gain your one day closer it will come in time hang in there and try the exorcize
.........Gnarly  

[atthebeach]

tina hun you have to make yourself move around the faster you start exercising the faster your endrophins will kick back in. push yourself. keep telling yourself you can. stand up and do 20 jumping jacks right now.get that body moving. so drive to the grocery store, the mall and walk around

[tinabe40]

thanks for the encouragement. I love hearing it. Im getting better with the physical stuff but those pills are calling my name. I think well could I take just one or two now instead of 9-10 and be ok. But my head tells me also that I'll so resent it. So for today...im fighting. I listen to music but the only true thing that helps is driving. However, Im tired so much that I lay down alot. But thanks to everyone for doing their best to help

[atthebeach]

Hey tina.
Get out and walk around.change the scenery.7 days is awesome. Pills are not the answer.
They got you in the mess you are in now.listen to some music. Get yourself out of your head. Keep fighting hun. Few more days. Step by step.day by day.you are doing it.
Keep the faith. HE is faithful. Do you believe it? Well then claim it and stand on HIS promises.
Hugging you my friend
Debbie

[tinabe40]

well, im wanting a pill right now so bad i can taste it. i feel like just one would at least make me think clearer. I don't know what i am going to do. I though at day 7 things would be better. I cant give up, but i feel like ****. Ive cried all day.

[t_nuh_had_nuf]

To Tina 40 from KY- This is TEENA 45 from KY (on oh border) You are gonna be ok. Try hot soaks they are they only way I made it thru. I got on the done when I was 40-BAD move!
121 days clean. I know it sux but you can do it. Peace TEENA
Happy belated bday!

[tinabe40]

Im detoxing off of 50 tab 10s a day. Im on my 7th day. I slept all night with ambien. I woke up in the most severe pain ever. MY back is KILLING me! The pain is incredible. I can't think straight. I can't eat anything but rice. I eat vitamins and potassium. some energy drinks too.
Thanks for the encouragement, but it's getting harder.

[gnarly_1]

HI  I just want to encourage you to keep going this is going to take every bit of perseverance you have and then some....Devin intervention therew Jesus got me threw when I had no more fight in me cry out to him he hears those that ask for his help pray to hime to eaz the shaking I hakted that partb to but it all part of getting off this stuff your doing good just remember we do this /......''just for today'' make it threw each day the best you can
your wining this slowly but thats how methadone goes if I can do it anyone can
I had a 16 1/2 yr run on narcotics 6 1/2 on methadone my withdrawals where brutal
but day by day it gets better are you sleeping yet ?? it took 2mo for me to get a desent nights sleep that and the energy crash is a bit much but a lot of ou have made it just take it for granted your going to be sick for a wile but onvce you start to dsee the light you will run after it good lucvk and God bless.....Gnarly//////keep poeting  

[tinabe40]

if the internal shakes would quit...then maybe id feel better.

[atthebeach]

hey thanks for checking in. congratulation you are on the 6th day. great job. keep fighting the good fight. you are making it. you should be starting to feel better. have you been eating,exercising, make sure you are pushing the fluids.
keep praying, so glad you have support it is so important.
keep the faith, HE is faithful, to bring you through.
praying for you,hugs
debbie

[tinabe40]

well, the physical wds are still awful. Im sweating, shaking..etc. The foggy feeling in my head hasn't let up. I feel like crap. But, im going to do this. Thanks for checking on me. I went out of town to a friend's house for a couple of days. She's a counselor, and helped me quite a bit.

[gnarly_1]

HEY its been a few days how you feeling are you still here with us btw happy 4th of july
just checking up on you.......Gnarly

[conflictedx]

I think you made a great choice by not going to the methadone clinic. You're at the point now to where you're getting past the physical w/d's.....watch for your triggers and try to avoid places that you might get the pills from.  Addiction is strong and it will test you.  You can do it if you really want it though, its definitely a life long process.  

[atthebeach]

hey hun wanted to check in and see how you are doing? physically,mentally,emotionally and spiritually? how long are you going to stay with your mom?
please make sure you move around, take some walks, do jumping jacks,
i am praying for you to be strong and to be healed
sending hugs and blessings
debbie

[jewlz2626]

4 days for you, 4 days for me! We can rejoice together :) Congrats! I know it's a HUGE deal for me after 10 years of this crap! Keep on truckin!! Julie

[tinabe40]

Woot! Woot!...4 days for me...and I am feeling better everyday. Scared of a relapse just because i now recognize Im an addict..yes folks...an addict who can't be trusted just yet. But Im taking this one day at a time, and I am armed with support, and vitamins, and potassium. I am going to be clean..I can feel it.

[vicki595]

Tina-  I just read through this thread. Good for you for getting away from the pills!! It gets better, you have to know that.

In the meantime, take care of yourself. Be sure to keep up on your fluids! Dehydration is a huge concern during detox along with low blood sugar so be sure and eat!

Take some vitamins and minerals. You need potassium,magnesium,calcium. Get yourself into a hot bath!  Get some HylandsRestful Legs at Walmart/Walgreens. Post back with any questions or problems,okay?  You're doing a great thing here.

Happy Birthday!

[tinabe40]

thanks...take care.

[azaddict]

Good for you not getting more pills. Hang in there, this is the best birthday gift you can receive.

azaddict

[tinabe40]

Im with you...day 3 and im so scared of day 4 and 5. I don't know exactly how to feel becuz my w/ds aren't as bad as normal. But, Im spending so much money...we are about broke. I can't believe this but my addiction is bad. I really want some meds right now, but have no money to get them. I did have a way earlier and didnt, so Im hoping tomorrow will be day 4 for me. Im lost, and need to find myself again. Good luck to us all...

[azaddict]

I can't do this anymore it has to stop. I've been sick so many times, waisting my life away.

I'm now on day 3, it's tough but what choice do we have. Losing everything , jails, institutions or death...