pain pill addiction

[tammygirl30]

hello my name is tammy and i am new to this board. it was reccomended by another member here who also post on drugabuse.com.  i am addicted to lorcet as well as whatever i can get my hands on.  i plan to detox beginning monday for the fifth time. i get clean and always manage to fall back in it talk about tortureing oneself. the mental part is a ***** for me. anyways i really want to do it for good this time. it is very difficult for me, i work at home and have two small children to tend to. does anyone have any good advice for coming off these monsters and being able to stay off for good?  i really will need support through this, it seems the boards do me more good than anything else. thank you tammy

[kell737]

I was like you,  I would take about any pain (Narcotic) I could get ahold of  but I preferred Percocet.    One question I have.... What were some of the ways your quit the first 5 times?   I will be more than happy to support you.  This is the best choice you will ever make.   I'm not going to sugar coat anything......... IT SUCKS, ITS HELL, IT'S MOST LIKELY THE WORST THING TO DEAL WITH BY FAR!!   After you get through it it is the best feeling in the world.  Being able to say OUTLOUD that I am 31 days clean is wonderful!  

Another thing..... if you look through some of these posts you will find something called "Thomas Recipe" ... it's basically some vitamins and such that REALLY work with the withdrawls, especially the energy.   Keep in touch and let me know if I can help.  GOOD LUCK!

~Kell

[kell737]

Here is a post I cut and pasted from mrmichael about the Thomas Recipe I was talking about.   IT WORKS!!!!!!!!


The recipe helps some, doesn't help others. I have seen where many said it was a waste of money. Others have sworn by it. It is a **** shoot. Here is the original by Thomas....REMEMBER, IT IS BY THOMAS!!!!! NOT ME!!!!!

****************************************************************

Here's my tried-and-true do-it-yourself hydrocodone "cold turkey" detox protocol.

Supplies you'll need first:

As many Valium, Xanax, Librium or Klonopin that you can get your hands on.
--- first day off the lorcet, use enough Valium or whatever, to, if possible, sleep through most of the first couple days. Then start decreasing the dose until you're down to nothing in about 5 or 6 days. You'll have to do the math. The Valium or one of its sister drugs will help tremendously with the anxiety and, somewhat, with the body aches.

Around-the-clock access to either hot baths or a Jacuzzi.

--speaking of those goddamn mostly thigh cramps that seem to love to show up in the middle of the night, have that hot bath or Jacuzzi at the ready. Don't hesitate to spend the majority of the week in that hot water if it's what it takes to get you through it. You may be wrinkled, but you'll have your sanity. Don't underestimate what the hot baths can do to relieve the withdrawal discomfort. They really work. Heating pads between the thighs can help with those cramps, too, but not as much as the hot baths.

Brand-name-only Imodium (immodium) (over the counter at the supermarket)

-- if you're a normal hydro addict, you'll be getting the runs by no later than the second or third day off the lorcet. In my experience, it's an especially unpleasant variety. At the first impulse, take two or three and respond to returning urges with two tabs. It's important that you do it immediately.

L-Tyrosine (qty 50 of the 500mg caps) - an amino acid available at the health food store.

-- thanks spook for this info: chronic use of narcotics depletes the brain of several critical neurotransmitters responsible for well-being and mental performance and attitude.
Plus:
Bottle of 100 mg B6 caps

-- Spook says every other day, but my experience detoxing with this stuff says take 4000 (four thousand) mg. (8x500mg caps of L-Tyrosine) with two 100mg B6 caps every day for your "detox week" to provide your brain with the raw material it needs to replenish its stores of these neurotransmitters. Many feel the difference on the very first dose. ***Take it on an empty stomach, either first thing in the morning or at bed time. You can continue this regimen after the first week if it continues to make you feel good. I continue to use it every other day with very few exceptions.
Multi-vitamins (most junkies don't eat too well, so this one's just for good sense)

Anyway, if you want to do it yourself and have a chance of being free of all narcotics instead of getting hooked on methadone, one of the hardest to get off of, by the way, you might try my formula. (It's "battle-tested" and works!)
2ND. one,
you will not come right until you replace all the zinc/mag you have leached out of your body over the past few years - this is what 'hanging out' really is - it's your body craving zinc/mag (zinc stops cravings/magnesium stops depression). If you don't do this it will take up to 2 years to return to normal as the only other source your body has for zinc/mag is food and then it is in such tiny amounts it takes years to build up again. If you get a blood test done you will find your levels of both are way down on what they should be.


A typical tablet contains somthing like this:

Zinc amino acid chelate 75mg
Magnesium amino acis chelate 37.5mg
Vitamin B6 10mg
Manganese amino acid chelate 10mg
Viatmin A (1000I.U.) 300mcg

Grading your habit on a scale of 1-10 (1 being occasional use and 10 being long term methadone at 100 plus mg's a day) you should take the following amount for a period of one month then slowly reduce to a daily amount of 2-3 per day.

Habit scale/size - Number of tablets per day for a month

10 10
9 9
8 8
7 7
6 6
5 5
4 4
3 3
2 3
1 2
0 2

You will notice that I recommend you never go below 2 per day. This is because zinc/mag depletion was your original problem so you should give yourself an ongoing supplement to make sure it does not happen again. I now take 2-3 per day to maintain my health. I have had no failures with this treatment (everyone OK after less than a month) and have treated addictions (including my own) as varied as methadone and cigarettes. The cigarrete smoker reduced from 2 packs per day to just 5 cigarettes per day in a week without any discomfort. If you suffer any kind of 'hang out' just increase the zinc/mag dosage and give it a liitle longer to take effect (a week or so). Don't beleive all the bullshit about drug addiction you have heard - it's all **** - this is the real deal. The drugs themselves are not actually addictive but they do leach all the zinc/mag out of your body by increasing the metabolism of them creating a shortage that gets worse the longer you use unless you replace them while you are using in which case you don't hang out when you stop - you just come straight - this is true beleive me I have tried it as have a few other people I know and none of us sufferred any hang out when we stopped

[tammygirl30]

i usually just toughed it out. i would drink energy drinks (would help for about 30 minutes) and lots of water. i just laid on the couch and suffered it out. this thomas recipe, did you try it?? if so i will buy all those things tommorow!!! the anxiety and muscle tiredness is what killed me the most. i have the most active kids in the world lol. i loved the feeling after getting clean, the energy is awsome, that feeling of normalcy!!! my weakness is when someone offers me them when i am clean and i am having a bad day then i start all over. i cant just take one and leave it at that, once i start i cant stop.  i hate that about me, always go overboard!! how did you come off them?? i know there is no easy way out, but there has got to be something that can at least make it easier to function, i really dont want to lay on the couch for a week it isnt fair to my kids. tammy

[kell737]

I  quit cold turkey.  I couldnt taper because having the pills around me period I wouldnt take them for tapering.  Didn't trust myself. Yes, I tried the Thomas Recipe.  I didn't start it until about 8 days after being clean  but OH MY GOD did it help me.   It gives your energy level back,  of course the Imodium (immodium) defiantely helps!  I was absolutely impressed and very pleased with it.  I still take it everyday and feel pretty good.  It even helps with the depression!  Give it a try , you'll be so glad you did.  (I feel like a sales person)  HAHAHAHAHAHA


  I will tell you, it's not really cheap.  I paid 147.00 for everything on the list.    IT'S WORTH IT!!!!!!!!!!!

~Kell

[tammygirl30]

Well ill definatly try it.  thank you so much for your help. i talk to you more soon. my 2 year old just dumped a whole bag of flour on the floor so i must go. nice way to start my day lol. you are very helpful to me, i hope youll be around next week, i really will need someone through this, thank you tammy

[kell737]

LOLOLOLOLO! flour!   Been there twice in fact!  LMAO

I'm here everyday during the week in the evenings and weekends throughout the day on and off.  You can email me anytime though....   kell_nc737***@****   ....  If you have  yahoo instant messeger my screen name if   fl_gator_gal1    

Hope your day goes better after the flour.  God bless you!

~Kell

[4kids]

Hi! I am also new to this forum. I can really relate to you. I am taking 12 Vicodens a day and I really want to stop but I am scared to death of going through the withdraw again. I have 4 small kids and like you, I feel like I don't want them to suffer through my with draw. Not to mention when I go off the pills I can't seem to clean or cook or anything and then my husband gets mad. I wish I could get a week to be alone and get sleeping pills and just sleep through the whole process, but with 4 kids that is impossible. My family knew about my habbit before but I had quit for 15 days and then started again and now I am scared to tell them I relapsed. I am scared everyone will hate me or something. But I also don't want my kids to see me taking pills anymore. I think I am going to try to find an out patient detoxe center. I really need help and I am really scared!! Thanks for listening and let me know how things are going.

[Jessica5683]

Hey Girl,
I am 7 day's clean from lorcet. I only used lorcet and abused it for two years. What worked for me is this sight in knowing I'm not alone and I'm NOT a bad person for being an addict. The stories helped and seeing people go cold turkey and live through it really helped. I think for me, I wanted and needed to get clean. I think for me, If there was even a little part of me that really didn't care to get clean I wouldnt have done it. For me though its only been a week and yes I've gotten clean before anf failed but something is different this time around. Hang in there and keep reading the posts here I swear it helps and the people here are AWESOME and they dont bull **** around they tell it like it is which for me I need Jessica

[tammygirl30]

hi nice to meet you. yes ive said many times i wish i could lock myself in a room from everyone and suffer alone. it is impossible. ive relapsed 5 times already and i am very sneaky, but i have confided in my husband and he thinks it is all in my head.  that is difficult when you dont really have the support of the one you love and look to the most.  but at the same time i try and act tough and sugar coat things so it is no wonder he does not take me seriously. i have absolutly no help with my children, i still have to go on no matter what with them, sick or not. and when my husband gets home, he is too exausted to take over from working all day and he wants his dinner.  i can really relate with you on that.  i plan to quit monday, i cannot go into rehab, there is no one to care for my kids, and i dont want anyone to know.  hopefully this time i dont relapse, no.... this time i wont relapse. if your ready to quit, stick with me and well compare miseries. good luck tammy

[tammygirl30]

hi nice to meet you. yes, i plan on stopping monday FOR GOOD. good for you one week clean!!!  the boards have always helped me every time before, its when i thought i didnt need it anymore and stopped reading about others, that i would relapse, to me they are better than any detox program.  i have to stop, they are running my life, if i dont have anything i know my day will be terrible and i wont be able to accomplish what i need to accomplish. fake happiness is all it is. i remember the other times when i got clean the wonderful feeling of normalcy and the extreme energy i got. the mental part is the hardest for me, because i like the way they feel and i think that just one or two wont hurt because im "HEALED" i should have learned that that isnt the case after the second time around but i guess i like to torture myself. well take care and thank you for your support, tammy

[kell737]

Hi there.   4kids and Jessica nice to "meet" you! Welcome to the forum, you'll find a lot of help here.  

4kids, I read your post and where you said when you don't take the pills, you don't want to cook or clean ....  I was the same way!  Everytime I would have to go a few hours  or a day (was the longest I ever went without for 8 years)  I didn't want to do anything.  I got grumpy with my kids, my husband, and all for no reason.  Thats a BIG reason I wanted to come clean.

All three of you hang in there, it gets better.  TRUST ME!   I wish you all the best of luck and I'm here for you all!  

~Kell

[Bodymechanic]

Welcome to the board. If you don't want to go cold turkey or wean slowly off, I suggest that you get exactly 24 ultram. They are very easy to find. (Yes, I know this is a very addicting drug).  Take them as needed over the next 72 hours. DO NOT take any more than 24 pills.  This well get you over the worst of the physical withdrawals. There are many doctors and clinics using this same proceedure with good results. I think if you follow this along with some of the other suggestions you will be fine.  You need a plan for staying clean.  AA/NA or even rational recovery may be able to help you if you are committed.

Bodymechanic

[motox4fun]

So would I be just prolonging my W/D by taking a few Ultram?
Does Ultram act just like the hydro? I am in severe W/D right now and have been thinking about popping an ultram but I am scared that it will just increase the W/D time
More info please...........
James

[tammygirl30]

thank you bodymechanic, you referred this site from another to us and i took your advice, the people in here are awsome, i was taken in the first 5 minutes i was in here, ive got more posts in here in a day than i have all week in the other. you all have made me feel very positive about my desicion to quit. thank you. i found some ultrams from a friend, about 12 that should be enough im tapered down to about 6 lortabs a day so i am hoping withdrawels wont be as severe. i am also going to get a few of the things from the thomas recipe, i want to continue to stay healthy.  take care tammy

[Tuss-ex1]

I am also new to this board, but have found great help here.  I am entering day 3 of w/d (Tussonex, Vics, Lorcet, Percocet).  Yeah, it sucks big time, but it does get better.  I have made an appointment with a head doc who specializes in Substance Abuse.  I too want to keep this quiet, I will let you know how it goes.  I can realate to you husband issue, it is the same for my wife.  It is hard, I don't know maybe even harder, for them to accept what the facts are.  I have tried to talk with my wife about the problem, but she simple does not hear how deeply it has gone.

Just hang in there, what I have been doing is when awake and the desire is really strong to go and get more, I come up and read for a while.  The messages here do give you hope.  

One question to everyone:  I have not made it seven days straight in a few years... What can you expect on the other side of this w/d that currently has me feeling like ****...  I just want to have an honest picture of what to expect.

God Bless

[Septer]

I have been taking Vicodins for several years now (2-4 a day).
I have been off of them for Three weeks now.  The only reason I have quit is because I needed to use my money for other things (wife's birthday and the cometh of the tax-man - I am a late filer).  
The guy who sells me my vicodins hasn't been pushing me to buy as of late.  We are familiar with eachother and he knew I was going to be tight on money for a few weeks.  But, as you might be able to tell, I am not quite sure if I would say NO if offered some in the next week or so even though I know I want to get off of them.  I still get the nervous feeling in my chest when I think about it.  
I have been taking Wellbotrin SRs for Two Weeks now and getting ready to Switch to Zyban for quitting smoking.  I was wondering if these anti-depressants actually help with Pain Pill Withdrawls as well.
The soreness has not subsided yet.  And now that I have been informed from some of these posts I realize that the "Loosies" I had a couple of weeks ago wasn't a virus after all  ;)
Anyhow, it has been educational reading some posts.  
I just feel that I DO need something better than Zyban to help with Vicodin and Cigarette withdrawls.  I am too embarassed to ask my family doctor for tranquelizers and I have hidden my addiction from my wife and rest of my family for Years.  Any pointers on medications to take that help?

[JSmith02]

What's on the other side? You get your life back, with all the good, indifferent and bad. It's like going from a 2-dimensional world to a 3-dimensional one. It will be scary and wonderful at the same time. Everything and everyone will seem different. You'll seem different to them and they'll react to that. You'll have a sense of accomplishment and invulnerability. And now you'll want to use again. You won't be as afraid of the drug as you were, and you'll know that, with your system fairly cleansed of drug, that first hit will feel wonderful. One hit, and you're at square one.

What do you do to keep yourself from that first hit? Well, you already know you're an addict, so use your addict self to save your life. Get addicted to something else, something that will bring you closer to your life. I know not everyone on this board can do this, but this is what I do: I addict myself to aerobic exercise. I mean anything that falls in that class: fast walking, bicycling, swimming, jogging, stairmaster, cross-country ski, etc. All kinds of good things happen in your body during sustained aerobic exercise. It will suck at first. It will be unpleasant and sweaty. For the first time, you'll get a real sense of what bad shape you're in. Do as much as is reasonable. After your shower, relax and concentrate on that wave of relief that flows through your body. Among other things, sustained exercise causes the release of endorphins (our favorite meal). The next day, don't focus on the exercise. Focus on that good feeling you'll have when you're done. Focus on it the same way you focused on that drug high as you drove to the pharmacy.

The L-Tyrosine can help you overcome the post-opiate malaise. This is when it will be most useful.

None of us can stop being addicts. But we can take addiction and turn it from a curse to a gift by addicting ourselves to that which is lifegiving.

Now, for a group hug ... NOT. I draw the line there!

Thomas

[AlexisInTx]

I want to re-iterate what Thomas said.  That's basically the entire jist of what's on the 'other side' of withdrawal.  

I had a problem with the aftermath more than anything, and I think that staying real busy is the key.  Finding an outlet that allows you to feel a sense of accomplishment is something that's important to me, and exercise - that's probably what's made me stick with it so far.  Those endorphins produced with an intense workout session is addicting to me, so I'm making sure I work out 4-6 days a week.  Start slow, and work your way up.  It doesn't feel so good the first couple of times, then it becomes something to really look forward to.  Before I injured my back and started taking the pills, I frequented the gym daily - that really was my addiction, so trying to replace one addiction for another healthier one is the goal now.  I also have my husband for my support system, that's about it as far as the support goes, so I lean on him and he's been great.  It's good that you're looking toward what's on the other side - there is a honeymoon period after detox that occurs where you feel so awesome and proud, but when everything calms down a bit, there can be a hole left where drugs used to be (at least with me) - that space can easily be filled with constructive activities.  I've found that having a schedule to adhere to and not let my mind wander is also important, I've already relapsed once, and I'm determined not to do it again.

[Tuss-ex1]

Thanks for the encoragement.  Jsmith just had another of the hot baths how could I have not known about that!!!  I am in or around day 4 since the last time I used.  This is the time that scares me the most.  I have never made it to day 5.  It seems as the w/d symptoms finally are letting up, this thing (craving, hunger, need) drops like a wall in front of me...

I am not going to do it today... If I have to take it minute by minute then so be it.  I am honest when I say that having people to talk to like this is what is making the time possible, because believe me I know the time every walk-in clinc opens within a 25 mile radius.

Thanks againg everyone,
God Bless

[peaz]

Wellbutrin and Zyban are exactly the same thing.  One is prescribed for smoking cessation (Zyban) and one as an antidepressant.(Wellbutrin)  The nomenclature difference is for insurance purposes.  Some companies will pay for smoking cessation;others will not.  The usual dosage is 300 mg/day, but the pill comes in two strengths; 100mg and 150SR, which is the sustained-release.  Perhaps you need your dosage upped for quitting smoking?  It does help, but you also REALLY have to want to quit.  Peace--Peaz

[koalabear]

I am very proud of you and all others trying to get off.  You all are doing great, and it's beginning to sound like an epidemic on this board.  Keep posting!

I think others need to hear your feedback on how you are doing.  

Hopefully you are through the worst of your w/ds.  AND you are doing a great service to the people that need to know what to expect on the other side.

So, please, keep posting so we know how you are doing.

Leah

[thodam]

IVE been hiding my addiction for a while now , from everyone. Im trying to quit now , and am on day 2. ive read some of these postings, and i just cant believe how many people out there are just like me. Im very embarrased of my addiction. to the point of total depression. i was taking 2 days ago , about 4 10/500 hydro's a day. My story is pretty much the same. about 10 years ago i had a bad accident, where i went the a windshield, and broke just about everything. i was fine then at 18, but about 6 years later. i learned i have TMJ in my jaws. the pain was escruiating ,. and never let up. one day , a guy from work , threw a nice pretty blue pill, and said it would make the pain go away ...i ate it , and by god it was gone, for about 4 hours anyways. i then turned into the person,paying this guy for them . 10.00 a pill. about 200.00 to 250.00 a week to support my habit.,.. my financial staus is terrible now. im remarried and i dont want this hurting my marriage. i have to stay off these things. they are destroying my life. I just cant imagine me having something control me like this. i was always a very strong, and was always the leader of the pack. Now, i feel like a panicy crackhead on the prowl any second....guys i need help plse...anything you can offer me would be really appreciated ...thanks thodam

[Tuss-ex1]

Just hang in there...  There is ALOT of good info on dealing with w/d on this board.  

I too know what it is like to be hiding an addiction from everyone.  Coming to a group like this is good, use it during your tuff times.  Also, I have always failed when trying alone, but that is just me.  Use this board to talk about it...its funny when you bring it into the light of day it dosn't go away but it seems do able.

I am in day 4 so Let me know if I can be of any help... I will say a prayer for your success.  I believe you can do it.

God Bless

[JSmith02]

Addicts are never alone. We just think we are.

[Paige]

I just found this site, I can really relate to everyone here.  I am attending my second NA meeting tomorrow. It has to help. I have been in AA for a while, but it's the pills that kick my butt.  I can't take it anymore.  AA is great but I can not talk freely about the pills there, and that is what gets me every time.  I just can't get through the detox.

[thodam]

GUYS I REALLY APPRECIATE THE REPLY ON THAT ...IM GOING TO BE CHECKING THIS PERIODICALLY DURING MY WORK DAY , BECAUSE THIS IS WHEN I WANT THEM THE MOST , I GUESS BECAUSE THEY ARE AVAILABLE HERE AS WELL. ITS HARDER HERE THAN ANYWHERE ELSE. AND I KNOW NOW IM GOING TO NEED SOME BACK UP , BY TALKING ABOUT IT THROUGHOUT THE DAY...THIS IS DAY #3 FOR ME NOW ...IM ACTUALLY NOT FEELING THAT BAD RIGHT NOW ....IM ON THE IMODIUM (immodium) BIG TIME THOUGH. AND I WOKE UP AT 0200AM LAST NIGHT AND COULDNT GO BACK TO SLEEP. I CAN FEEL AND PUSHING OR BURNING IN MY CHEST THAT GETS UNBEARABLE SOMETIMES. BUT , THIS TIME I KNOW I WILL MAKE IT ...I JUST LOVE MY FAMILY SO MUCH , AND I CANT LET THEM DOWN GUYS....HELP ME ALL YOU CAN PLSE ...THANKS MY NAME IS DAMON

[Paige]

Good luck to everyone trying to start to detox today.  I really understand, I love my family so so much, I am just starting to detox tody.  It is only 10:00. I have some darvon in the house and I am already thinking about downing 6 and waiting until tomorrow.  This is about the fifth time I have detoxed, once in a rehap, all the other times at home.  You would think I would learn.  That is the insanity of this whole mess, I always think I can handle it and I never can.  I have a wonderful family, a wonderful life, I don't know how I keep ending up here.  I can not let them know again.  It just hurts them too much.  I have to do this on my own.  I took down the detox method recipe, I am going to try it. I hope something works.  I just don't think I can do this again.

[Tuss-ex]

You are very strong... on day 3 I was a complete basket case.  I will be thinking and praying for you today.  I have now made it to day 5 (this is uncharted territory for me).  The advice here helpped alot in dealing the w/d.  

Keep your head up and keep your eye on the prize...

God Bless

[Whisky]

I'm on day 5 (I think) for darvocet withdrawal - and I ache, got perpetual sniffles, sneezing uncontrollably and very little energy.  I was expecting another order of darvocets 2 weeks ago, but they never came; so I don't have any ... but if I did...I don't know what I'd do???  If they were delivered today - I fear I'd take a few...I feel useless...just horrible.....

[Paige]

I am on day one withdrawal from Darvon, same drug just no tylenol in it.  The sleepy feeling is uncontrolable with this withdrawal.  I can just fall asleep anywhere when I tried to withdraw before. I have about 35 darvon left, I just don't want to go there again.  I can't I can't do this anymore.  Some people say darvon withdrawal isn't so bad, but I don't agree.  I am going to try some of the tips I am finding here on the board.  Ie, the THOMAS stuff and the Imodium (immodium).  I just know I will need energy and to get the restless legs to stop at night.  That is when I always give in.  You have gone a few days now, don't give in if they come in the mail....don't even keep them.  It is a hell trap.  Good luck!

[Whisky]

Hi Paige,
It's rare to find someone else withdrawing from darvon or darvocette.  I did detox 5 years ago from vicodin/oxcycontin - had to go inpatient for that becasue it was very rough - I got a taste of those restless legs/anxiety and I couldn't deal with it.

But I haven't know what it's like withdrawing from darvocettes..guess I'm finding out now.  I must say, I dont have restless legs/anxiety - I'm guessing he clonidine patch (which has lowered my blood pressure to 90/60 ...is helping that plus I take klonopin at night.

But these flu-like symptoms are relentless; I'm wondering is it a flu or is it withdrawal; it cooncided with stopping...so..and the fatigue is overhwleming too; blood pressure affects that too, it's hard to stay vertical for too long (and I have things to do!!!).  I have a flight of stairs in my house - it's hard to walk up that, whew.

I'm hoping the darvos don't come in the mail - but I was actually hoping they would today which is a bad sign - if I can over a hump ... or feel fairly OK - I think I might just be able to flush them; right now it would be difficult....

Liza

[Paige]

Hey Liza, if they come you should fluss them.  It is not the flu, at least I don't think it is, I tried several times, sombie like state, every part of me gets weak.  Anyway, I wish I had that patch right now.  It is late and I am going to ripe my restless legs right off.  I can not believe I have not run up to that damn draw and down what is left, I am just scared.  I detoxed from other norcotics before and ended up in the hospital, I just can not do that this time, there is too much family trust I would be breaking.  I have to stick this out and until I just can not take it anymore, I need to save what I have.  I know, sounds crazy.  I am thinking about another hot bath but the water running wakes everyone up.  I have three kids, can't deal with them awake right now.  Ripe My DAMN legs OFF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
If I wasn't a recovering alcoholic, I would just get very drunk right now, then I would pass out.  I won't, haven't had any in two years and I am going to lick this thing too.

Good luck to you too, flush them okay, don't start over.

[Shame_for_pain]

I will tell you what I experienced; I cannot imagine why it would not work for you. I know it has for many.  Through a pain clinic, I was placed on Methadone.  Methadone has a 24 hour half life.  There is far less chance of addiction.  It is less likely to feed your brain the euphoria that makes you crave opiates in the first place.  If you take more than what you need to be comfortable, you will feel the euphoria; therefore, you have accomplished nothing.  Otherwise, unlike the well known opiate pain meds, methadone can be used to take you down gradually, without the suffering.  I was addicted to Oxycontin, and any other opiate I could find.  After reaching a 100+ mg daily habit, which was unsustainable, I asked for help through my personal physician.  I was sent to a neurologist; he started me on 80 mg. methadone daily.  I weaned myself to 10 mg daily in one year, with no suffering.  Due to my need for pain relief, I've gone back up to 30 mg daily.  It works.  There is no withdrawal torture as long as you don't jack up your dosage.  It also prevents migraine headaches.  Before methadone, I had at least one every month; after 17 months on methadone, I've had no migraines, and no cravings.
        If you are a person of faith, you can be assured that Christ will make a difference to an extent that cannot be expressed in words.  Otherwise, the methadone is the only way out, to my knowledge.  I've been fighting this war for more than twenty years.  Good luck to you.
Good luck!

[Paige]

That is what it is a damn war.  Don't you have to go to a clinic every morning to get methodone?  I heard very bad things about it.

[Paige]

I was just wondering how you were doing? Did they come in the mail?  Did you flush them?  Well I am a big talk, I ended up with a 30 tab refill, I just couldn't go through another night like that again.  I was going to ripe my f'in legs off.  I talked to my doctor though and he gave me some ambien to sleep and some vitamins to help with the exhaustions so I will try again tomorrow.  Once I get through this, I better never do this again.  Even as I type that, I don't trust myself, I am insane, 100% BRAINLESS :{ Well, I hope you are doing it anyway.  How do you get them through the mail.  Wait don't tell me.  paige

[Paige]

Horney.....I am too damn sick to be horney....I am sick as a dog!  You are lucky!

[GOD]

Hmmm....

Funny thing about the INTENSE orgasms in the first few days of detoxing. I think It's because we've dulled our senses so much with the drugs that when we come off them, everything IS more noticable. A little paper cut hurts like hell, and an orgasm seems to EXPLODE through your whole mind and body. By the way, I'm a guy, and I'd forgotten just how good sex could feel-- Especially when you squirt like a faucet when you ***... (one of the shitty side-effects of the opiates is that the old sperm-count goes WAY down. BUT, in just the first week off the drugs, it all comes back!)

Cheers to you! And enjoy yourself while it lasts!
Jess

[Imzadi258]

Well, I've been reading and thought I would post a comment. It all started a few years ago when I was prescribed Lortab for migraines. It went like that for three to four years just taking them here and there. Then my back started hurting and my knees starting hurting. I broke some bones in my back when I was younger and I weigh 290 LBS so my back and knees are shot. I met a man with a virtually infinite supply and at the time was making good money so before long I was taking 30 a day. My friend was taking 80 or so a day. YES...you CAN take that many. They just never worked on my like everyone else. The first time I took them for a migraine I had to take 30 MG.s and yes I count my dose in MG.s not in tablets. I hurt with them from constant W/D and I hurt without them from simple pain so I'm just....screwed. Well yall take care and I'll write again someday.

[BadBackAndBeyond]

Hi everybody.  I'm new to the forum.  I've finally admitted to myself that I have a problem with painkillers when my insurance wouldn't cover my refill (too soon) and I paid out of pocket for my vicoprofen to the tune of $75.00.  I've had 2 back operations due to ruptures at l4-5 and l5-S1.  I've been on pain meds before on and off without a problem.  But since March of this year I've been on them constantly.  I was able to quit for a month.  The withdrawal was hell but I toughed it out but then the burning pain in the leg flared up again.  Nothing kills the pain like opiates.  My doc called in the script and the whole cycle starts over again.  The problem is that I keep taking them after the pain is gone.  I run out, then I get sick with withdrawal so I have the doc call in a script so I don't have to go through it.  I can honestly say the only reason I stay on this **** is to AVOID withdrawal.  Hydrocodone withdrawal is pure f*cking evil.  Pardon my language but that's the only way I can describe it.  I can't tell anyone about my situation and my self-esteem is in the toilet.  I'm weaning myself off the Vicoprofen.  Hopefully I can quit this time.  Any advice would be appreciated.  Thanks for letting me rant.

[lisa65]

Hi. I am new to this board. I've been abusing pain medications for about two years now. It all started when i got my wisdom teeth pulled. I loved the way they made me feel. So, I started taking anything I could get my hands on.Now, I'm at the point where I need to take percocet in order to sleep at night. If I dont I have the withdrawl symptoms. I am an ordinary housewife and no one in my family has any idea I'm doing this. I want to stop, but i feel like i can't. I'm dreading the withdrawl symptoms. I just wanted to talk with people who understand what I'm going through. I would appreciate any advice. thanks.

[hillary5]

hey there and welcome...you've come to the right place.  we are all here to listen and help the best we can.  I see you've been using for 2 yrs.  how many were you taking per day?  right now basically you're taking them to prevent w/d's right? been there done that too ... What do you plan on doing and how are you planning on stopping?  do you have anyone at all you can tell? I mean if you were to taper off of these are you strong enought to take them as the schedule states? i know i wasn't.  Can you tell your husband? if not, why? you know they usually know something is up, whether its the addiction, they know. trust me .. my husband knew about it but my parents didn't .. i mean they knew i took pills but i don't think they realized the extent of it until i told them...they knew was just waiting for me to admit to how much and for how long...this explained my moods, my not wanting to participate in family functions and so on and so on ... once i started the suboxone treatment they were sooo happy. my husband and my 18yr old were too ... i have 2 other children that are 3 & 4 so they don't realize whats going on but eventually they would of known .. ya know?  anyways, try talking to him or a friend .. very hard to fight this all by yourself....almost impossible .. i mean you can come on here when you having a hard time and all .. let me know how many you've been taking and what your plan of action is .. you HAVE to WANT it to do this ... k? ... thx! peace! ;-]

[lisa65]

Hi. Thank you soo much for responding to me. I only have to take 3 at night just to stop the w/ds. I used to take more, but now I can go all day without them. I actually told my husband lastnight. he was very supportive! Turns out, he knew anyway!! I figured he did. But my parents have no idea. Im too ashamed to tell them. I have a 5 year old son and i reallly want to stop using. I couldn't deal with it if he ever found out. How long have you been clean? Any advice you could give me would be greatly appreciated!!! thx!

[hillary5]

hey there ... Well thats good that you've been able to get down to 3 at least .. you should be proud of yourself for that!!!! And yuo don't need to take any during the day to get thru .. thats good too!  You're going in the right direction. You just need to get those 3 down to 0 .. ya know?  Thats awesome your husband wz supportive.  It's funny we think they're going to be omg! and start ranting and raving and say all these mean and nasty things when it turn it's just the opposite.  

My kids were my reason for quitting....My oldest (18 ) knew about it and sometimes him and his friends would joke about it w/me .. need a vike momma bear? they would say .. used to **** me off cuz they found it funny ... they have no idea what its like and i hope my son realizes that it's hard and it's an addiction.  Doesn't matter that the doctor prescribed it and kept giving them to me, i got hooked! ... I just couldn't stand the thought of my younger ones growing up w/out me .. it sickened  me .. i cried everytime i thought about it.  I knew it wz wrong to take that pill when i wz taking them but i couldn't help  myself .. couldn't stop.   I tried c/t and it just didn't work for me .. i wz taking anywere from 10-15 vikes a day or up to 3 80mg oxy's a day .. sometimes i would snort the oxy;s .. that wz another lite bulb moment!  i was like what am i doing this for? am i that addicted? yes i wz

A friend told me about suboxone and i just didn't really believe that it would work and thought it wz a joke.  When i seen her after she started it 2wks later, omg! what a difference ... And she wz worse than i wz on the pills, if you can believe that ... but even after day 2 when i talked to her over the phone i could hear a big change in her.  She's been in rehab twice and has had a crack addiction too ... i figured if she can do it so can i ... Went to the same dr she did ( who is wonderful and now my pcp ) and started the suboxone.  I had to give him every detail of my drug addiction, fess up to alot of things and felt like a ton of bricks were lifted from my shoulders. That next day i wz like, i feel so normal .. don't feel f'd up - cloudy, lazy, emotional .. i felt like i did before i started the pills.  I have not taking a vicodin or oxy since apr 7 of this year. But suboxone does have a mild opiate in it....i can't explain how it works. one drug blocks the opiate but makes you not have the w/d's or cravings.  i am slowly tapering from 24 down to 8mg .. i'm still at 20mg and next month will go down another 4mg .. i've had a bout of depression this last month and a half and he didn't feel that i could handle going down and didn't want to risk it .. i probably could of done it since he  upped my paxil .. anyways .. thats my story. sorry to keep babblin .. seems like whne you start typing you just can't stop .. lol ..

how long have you been taking the pills and how long did it take for you to get down to 3?  you should be proud of yourself for that and give yourself a pat on the back .. did you taper to get there?

Do it for yourself, your child and your husband .. You'll wish you would of done it sooner ... good luck to you ... my daughter just got home from pre-school .. see what they learned today - this wk is fire safety wk ... peace! i'll be on for a while too .. ;-p

[jhiraqua]

I FEEL SO HORRIBLE. I HAVE BEEN ON ULTRAM FOR 2 YEARS AND FOUND MYSELF UP TO 10 A DAY. I RAN OUT SUNDAY AND DECIEDED TO GO C/T BUT LO AND BEHOLD COULDN'T DEAL WITH THE W/D SO WENT TO MY DR. TODAY AND GOT MORE. I'M REALLY DISAPPOINTED IN MYSELF BECAUSE I GAVE IN SO EASILY BUT I DON'T THINK I CAN TAKE ANOTHER DAY OF W/D'S OR PAIN. I FEEL LIKE A NEW PERSON WHEN I'M ON THEM. I SEEM TO SLEEP BETTER AND HAVE AN OVERALL SINCE OF WELL BIENG NOT TO MENTION THE INSTANT PAIN RELIEF. I THINK I'LL TRY THE TAPERING METHOD BECAUSE WITH EVERYTHING GOING ON IN MY LIFE AT THIS MOMENT I NEED TO BE ABLE TO FUNCTION. I JUST TOOK 4 AND PRAY THAT THAT'S ALL I'LL NEED TONIGHT PLUS SHE GAVE ME A MILD MUSCLE RELAXER. (GOD, I HOPE I DON'T GET ADDICTED TO THAT TOO!)PLEASE PRAY FOR ME AND ANY ADVICE YOU CAN GIVE IS SO APPRECIATED. I FEEL SO MUCH BETTER NOW THAT I'VE FOUND THIS SITE AND SEE THAT THERE ARE PEOPLE JUST LIKE ME OUT THERE.