please share about aftercare

[Kova]

Hi all,

today is the 4 week mark for me with no methadone, and i think because i am finally starting to feel somewhat "normal", i can feel my reslove weakening and that little voice over my shoulder whispering, "see!  you can quit any time you want!  so now that you are passed the hard part, how would it hurt to just pop a few before the long work shift today?"  so i am coming to the realization that it is indeed NOT over and that really the hard part is just beginning.  how to stay clean??

i know a lot of people have success with NA.  i have tried NA once and i really disliked the meetings so i stopped going.  the philosophy is cool, the spirituality and all that is fine with me, but i really got nothing out of hearing hard luck story after story.  this forum has been a great help to me and i KNOW i would not have come this far without it.  i have a private therapist whom i see once a week, but addiction is not really her specialty and she keeps trying to get me to go to NA!  so i'd like to know if any of you could share your experiences with me about NA or any other kind of after care so i can get some help.  it takes so much strength to ignore the little drug voice, and i don't know for how long i will be able to keep it up on my own.

with all the love in my heart,

Kova

[bubbles1096]

Kova, I totally see your point with the NA/AA thing and agree with you. I'm sure there are tons of people who have your point of view and experience that with NA/AA. I to drink occasionally, but I do not call myself an alcoholic, it can be done in moderation and not get out of control. I got into an agrument with a co worker of mine who regularly attends NA & AA  meetings and she told me straight up that I'm an alcoholic because I can't stop drinking (meaning you can neer drink again), basically saying anyone who drinks is an alcoholic. So, if I drink a Spanish Coffee on a Friday night to wind down with the girls (which we do the last Friday of each month), then I'm considered an alcoholic. I told her, look, I have a problem with pills, not drinks. She said I was in denial. I don't care for the who either can't or you are mentality, but hey, if it means other people need that focus not to use, well then by all means go for it. We all have to do what works for us and I respect that. I haven't drank in probably 2 months and my sister has a glass of red wine almost everynight when we eat dinner and I do not consider that to be an alcoholic either.

One thing for sure is this board has help me out in ways I couldn't begin to describe.I would recommend and have recommended this board to many people. I appreciate everyone's messages and thoughts, well wishes and opinions.

[Kova]

Thank you so much!  i have been saying to my therapist and all of my loved ones that this forum is a GREAT support team for me.  i would not have come this far without it.  these ARE my meetings.

Kova

[bandnmom]

I tried NA and didnt really like it myself. The only support i really have is this forum and the great people here. I have tried so many times and always failed until i found this forum. It was my life saver. Each to their own is what i say. Just find what works best for you and run with it!
Stay strong!

Jen

[Kova]

one BIG thing about NA is they are going to tell me not to drink alcohol and i refuse to give that up.  i have never abused alcohol.  i don't want to give up my glass of wine at dinner, especially now since they are finding all of these health benefits from it.  i guess i just don't see things as black and white as the NA groups do.  yes, i am an addict, but no, i am not an alcoholic.  it is possible to have a strong addicition to one thing and NOT something else.

thanks for all the responses!

Kova

[bubbles1096]

Pat yourself on the back for realizing it's a constant battle, even when you do stop. I've been 65 days now and I'm at my wit's end, this is the first day I've thought about actually using.  I would look into finding a therapist that specializes in drug recovery and substance abouse and give NA a try again.....but try a different group. Each group has thier own atmosphere and since they have different people going, each one is different. Also, figure out what keeps you from using and what triggers your use. Once you find successful ways to keep yourself busy and keep your mind of from using, stick with it and recovery goes in many steps and many stages, so depending on your lifestyle, age, health, career, family, some things may work at a moment in time but other's may not. Just realize and be proactive and take care of #1 (you)! Good luck!

[road2recovery]

I have not found the right meeting, i guess where i feel comfortable....I can't get myself to talk much....but with the addiction counselor i have no problem and got to the core issues with myself...But i do want to attend meetings, because i do like them, I think i would do better with a smaller group....i will not give up..
r2r

[Kova]

never heard of AODA.  is it available in the NY area?  my therapist keeps saying NA so i am not sure if she knows about this.

Kova

[fengirl09]

Why don't you see if your therapist could recomend an AODA therapist or counselor for you. Atleast then you would have someone who specializes in dependence problems. Most AODA counselors can get you into group meetings also. Atleast they do in my area, I know every area is different. It is worth checking out. The group meetings that I attend are at my out patient place, so the groups are only like 10 people and are lead by my therapist. I will say it took about a month to get in to the program though. It was worth the wait. Aftercare is such an important part of recovery. Find what works for you no matter how long it takes.
Good luck

[Kova]

so you don't go to NA meetings either?

[avisg]

I see a therapist with sub abuse training ,staying clean is the hard part and the forum is great but it cant be considered aftercare .Find something that works for you .The first time I tried to get clean I didn't get any aftercare I made it 6 months and relapsed now its been over a year so aftercare really does help.

[Kova]

you have not found the right one of what?  meetings?  did you ever get a sponser and that whole thing?  why did you not like the meetings?

Kova

[road2recovery]

I can totally relate...Aftercare is so important, and that little voice is telling you this...I see a therapist...She is in recovery herself, and that is what she specializes in....This has helped so much, and this forum..I have gone to both NA and AA meetings and just have not found the right one...But i want to continue in that direction, and add meetings to my counsouling.....I find as time goes by, I forget how much it hurt to detox, I NEVER want to go back to that life, so i know i need more aftercare...Find what works for you, good luck
r2r