scared to death

My hubby just left, on a plane, 3000 miles away from us, he is going to try and detox off of perc 30's.  I know I can not do this for him, I know he has to want it for himself, but it is all I think about.  He left because there are to available here, couldn't get clean with them being around, the people ( dealers ) being right here.  When he left his system as so screwed up he couldn't even urinate, so I sit here with our children worried out of my mind.  What do I do now?

[vicki595]

All you can do is take care of yourself. You need to be strong for those children. He'll take care of himself.

You could go to an AlAnon meeting and look for addiction support groups in your area for yourself and for him,when he comes home.

Also,just be supportive of him as you are now. This is rough.

Good luck-

[wanting2stop]

Hey there,
He needs you the most right now. As a user myself we all know wherever you go, the pills or drug of choice will be available. I suggest you tell him to come home and support his decision to stop. It will take time and baby steps..

[gnarly_1]

Wheres he going a detox center or a friends home or mabe mom and dads the detox is no fun but it is only the beginning of a long jurney back he's going to need aftercare to make it less the 10% of the people how try to get clean make it 1yr without aftercare....now there are good free programs out there both N/A  and A/A offer 12step programs that work if you work them
if not that there are conslors and therapists that speslize in addiction but in order to do this he is going to have to plug in somewhere support is critical  as an addict we need to change the very way we think to survive ,,,,,getting cleen isthe ez part staying clean takes work I hope this give you a better idea of what your up ageist and what it going to take to make it threw good luck and God bless......Gnarly    

[helpforhubby35]

he tried, really tried here, he went 4 days, 4 days of utter hell, cold sweats, hot flashes, vomiting, the shakes, anger, crying, depression, and we really thought he had come out the other side, but of course the demons are always close, and to be honest this is not our first rodeo ( 15 years of marriage ), but this time is different, he has never been "drug sick" as he calls it. So he made the choice to go, and yes I know and he does also that no matter where if you want it bad enough you can find it, but he went to stay with a family member that lives out in the middle of no where, tryng to make it a harder if the urge arises.  And the worst part is like almost everyone else on this site, it all started with a prescription, he hurt his knee, and he still has another surgery to go thru, so we have to prepare for the pain management after that as well.

[LeaAnn807]

Hi!  Here is the problem I see.  We can all "get" clean.  When he comes home, he will have to be around the pushers and dealers, and honestly it won't be any easier to say no then.  I know that the WD seems like the hard part, but it really isn't.  Staying clean is much harder.  

For you, I would suggest Al Anon.  It could really help you to deal with his addiction in a healthy way for YOU.  Let him deal with "him".  You deal with yourself and the kids.  

I do give him big kudos for doing this.  I'm just letting you know that it's not over when the detox ends!

Good luck! : )

[helpforhubby35]

I love my wife we've been together 15 years. Please give her advice but please don't tell her to not help me I need her and my kids. I LOVE THEM so much and need them in my life. Anyone that can offer advice for us, or live in the Bellevue Wa..  We can us any help or words encourage THANKS TO EVERYONE FOR THERE HELP..........