Hey bud, im goin soon, got the final interview done, there are alot of issues with my drug abuse, family history, mental and emotional abuse, the list goes on, im ready to take it on. I will post when im leaving for treatment, you guys are wonderful and if i could see you right now id give you all a hug..Im ready to meet my new person, whoever she is....God Bless...thanks sara, oxy, laurel, the list goes on...pray for me k, thanks...
HI......you got to get sick of the runaround chasing the high....and the desire to get clean has to exceed the desire to get high....as I have said many times the addict needs to change the very way we think to get well.....you will learn this in treatment then you must apply it to your life for the rest of your life for it to work.....where always a work in progress hang in there you have made the right decisions for you now just follow threw and you'll be fine good luck I wish you all the best in treatment we have had several members do really well with this approach the key to success is applying what you learn there........Gnarly
Well, i got all paperwork done with Counselor, and waiting for admission to Treatment. Yesterday was horrible, i hadnt had a pill for over 24 hours, feeling hopeless right now, i hate myself because i went out and found some pills. I was so tired of the headaches, and body aches, so my crazy addictive brain says, well, go get a couple pills so you can feel better. Well i did, and i certaainly dont feel better, i only have a few, so it looks like tapering till i can get checked in, why are we sooo stupid....i dont get it, i sure wish i could be stronger, i really tried, but i guess not hard enough, how do you guys do it....help im lost here.
Hi there, thank you for your post. I called the Addiction Counselor again this morning, kinda giving her a push to let me know when i can get in Treatment. It is through the state, and is on a sliding scale, so the cost would be next to nothing. But i told her i did not want to sit around and wait for 3-4 weeks, i need to go now (before i chicken out). I checked into an independent treatment center, and the cost is $20,000!!!! wow, cant afford that, even WITH insurance. So with some hope and prayers i can get in pretty soon. As of now, i have no support system at home like you, my husband is being anything but supportive. I am trying so hard not to use, but not working very well. Hopefully i will get some answers soon, and can go get help, feel very alone and lost. Will keep you posted. thanks.
Hi,... Antidepressants are not addictive, wannabfre2b, so don't have worries about becoming addicted to them. If your friend stopped suddenly taking paxil, she was going to experience some bad effects but only because you can not stop taking it at once.That's all, whereas clonazepan is addictive and i would take an antidepressant instead of a benzo, imo. Good luck :)
Breathe....just breathe. I am on day 3 and I feel for you. I called yesterday..number after number. Bottom line, no bed until Monday. Of course they advised I not go it alone at home...but for me, that is what I need to do. I am not alone, I am blessed with a support system, which is what all of us need. If you DO NOT have that at home, then you HAVE TO go somewhere where there is one, without a doubt. Our minds play wicked wicked tricks on us. Stay strong and breathe.....
I am in hell but fighting my way out, moment by moment. My thoughts are with you....
I just got back from appt with addiction counselor ($175!!!) I was only there for and hour and a half, we discussed all substance abuse issues, past history, etc. I am on a waiting list to go to treatment, may be 3-4 weeks before i can get in there. I have some horrible anxiety, like i said to her, so what do i dotill i can get in there. I will be going crazy with anxiety, fear, guilt, shame, you name all of them. She is going to set me with a doctor to help with some meds to keep me calmed down, she said anti-depressents, maybe some kind of tranquilizer or something. For one, i dont want to take anti-depressents, they are addicting too, i know a friend that takes them (paxil) and when she runs out she goes off the deep end, God, i dont need that, something like clonazapam would help me just fine, i dont need to get hooked on another drug!!! We talked about suboxene, and i said, NO to that too. So now its just waiting, im ready to go check in today......wait, wait.....and pray. well theres my update, any ideas out there?
Well I had an appointment with an addiction counselor today, but the weather turned and we have another blizzard, she had to cancell appt until wednesday morning. I was really looking to get the ball rolling, so have to sit and wait it out. My family is very happy im going(of course except my abusive husband), so try and live this out until i can get there, sounds like a good treatment center here in my state, so dont have to go far, and my sister is going to take me. Hope it will be soon. Ill keep you posted, and thanks for the prayers, boy do i need them.
Great choice and I know you will make it. I will be praying for you and God will guide you through all of this. Just remember keep an open mind and take away everything you can from the experience. God Bless---Rick
Hi everyone, i think i found the right place, its a chain of treatment centers, that deal basically with drug addiction, its called DrugStrategies, Inc. there is one not too far away, im planning on getting on that plane on Feb 14, and not looking back. I am going through some horrible stuff, getting a divorce is a big one. But i know if i am clean and sober i can do it (i can do all things through Him that strengthens me...) Im scared, but optimistic. Please send me some prayers. thanks to all of you, i'll let you know when im leaving, and hope i can make it till then. love you all.
I just wanted to wish you good luck on your search and your recovery. I really hope you find a treatment center and that you get good recovery care, care that you deserve. Please know you have my support and I am thinking of you!
Well day two, i have been unable to sleep, i keep thinking about, "is this the right thing to do, my crazy addictive brain is saying, "your fine, you dont need to go, its not that bad, you know, i hate when i start getting the "doubties". I have been searching for a good place to go that i would be comfortable, ( i know its NOT a vacation, but i dont want to be in a hospital, or even worse, a prison feeling) I havent been doing that many meds, in fact hardly any, and have really cut down on the beers. My sister said something to me that keeps ringing in my mind, "when the pain of the problem is worse than the solution to the problem, its time to do somehting about it". The state i live in doesnt have alot of options for treatment centers, if im going, i want to get good care, and a good recovery program, so the search is still on, if anyone knows of a good one, please post me, i have talked to the one in Florida, and it sounds awesome, but my funds are low and i dont want to be that far away (thats a long way) i evern looked at CA, CO, maybe even WA state, but to no avail. And then, it will be very difficult coming home, my husband is a pretty heavy drinker, (he doesnt use tho), but it will be hard. There is an NA meeting tonite and i have been putting that off too, but im going tonite, if just to listen. Any ideas of a good treatment center out west let me know,,,,,,im feeling very anxious today, but alot closer to the answer and my maker,,,,,he wants to know me again too.....God bless,,keep me posted, as i search. thanks..for letting me vent.
Rehab saved my life its not easy but you have to do whatever it takes to get your life back on track. And the tools you learn and AFTERCARE will help you to stay clean when you come home. So proud of ya for making this decision Good luck and best wishes ,,,,James
awesome choice!!!!!
U R doing the right thing..
And you ARE loved...
Brother Frankie.
HEY just wanted to encourage you to go threw with this many of our members have went this rout and I never heard a single complaint your doing the right thing here may God will be with you.......Gnarly
Just wanted to encourage you. I think is is a wonderful idea, especially if you have the resources to go. Like many that posted before me, take advantage of everything there and stay the full term to reprogram your brain and behaviors. God Bless
Hope all's going well. I've had to throw out abusive ex (chronic streetdrug polyaddict) so can try to reduce temegesic.H
You are now where I was last week. By speaking with the idiots on the phones at some of these places they told me over and over that there wasn't a bed for me and call back. This went on for a week until I ran completely out of any meds and went into seizures and was taken to the er. Blood pressure was a big factor for me. What they didn't tell me until it was to late was that if I had just gone to the facility they would have taken me. Ask this question when you are calling. Never once did they offer this info to me, the nurse I had helping or my insurance company that had to override many things to allow me to go. It's of little solace to hear that everything happens for a reason at this point of suffering physically and emotionally, however I'm home on day 6 now getting through it with the help of a new doctor that I got through the ER, a new attitude, a husband that now understands and all of the people on this forum that helped me survive (literally). It's not going to be easy whichever road you go on but like me it sounds like your mind is made up so don't be denied! Like anywhere, there are "know it alls" that answer the phones in admissions at these places that don't have a damn clue! Good luck and I, along with many others are with you in your struggle and will be here for you. If you need to talk, message me. Sincerely, Lewney2n (Renee')
This too shall pass..You will be happy and strong again..It takes a LOT of balls to do what you are doing. You will make it.
Posting to everyone, thought id give you an update, going to Florida to Treatment, not an option, to far away from home, so Im checking into facilities in my state. My hands are shaking as im posting, i am sooo scared. But buddy, i am so sick of being sick, having to take a pill to feel better, or slamming a beer, or pot, you name it whatever i can get my hands on. It has spiraled so much in the last few weeks, and if i dont get some help, i wont be around, life is good, i want to be happy again. As i said, i have tried over and over to quit on my own, i need some guidance, i just dont want to go to one of those places and just get locked up like a prisoner, i would go off the deep end. Im praying for Him to show me the right place, i have already called my insurance, they pay for 80% for substance abuse treatment. I have hit rock bottom guys, suicide is not an option, its get real and find myself again. This desease is to consuming, i feel like its taken everything from me, and gives nothing back. Please pray for me to find the right place to go to, within a week i will be checking in...I love this forum and all of you........you guys rock...
I'm on your side too. Whatever it takes to get clean is the right decision. You'll be a better person for having done it. When you get out be sure to come back here and let us share in your success. Good luck.
Wow! You are very brave and you can totally beat this! I looked into Rehab centers myself but chickened out. My mother discouraged it too, I suppose she is pretty overprotective..But I really admire you..You are going to beat it!!
Treatment saved my life and it can do the same for you! Good for you for making one of the hardest but one of the best decisions there is!
This is a great(and hard)decision. Good for you. Don't be afraid...I think it's just perfect.
Stay in touch here and keep posting until you leave.