Aa
this forum
I am so exhausted. I know I am at the least.2 weeks clean from opiates...I am more like just about 3 weeks in, give or take a couple days. As I stated in one of my other post.....right now, the days are not as important to me as how Im feeling is. I was really doing well, but today feels like I am back at day 3-4 or something around there. Its just awful. Sure is discouraging. I fought so *** hard to even get here, I just dont think I have anything left to keep fighting this hard, it just seems hopeless again. I found some old tramadol that I had, I am soooo tempted to just take a couple to see if it takes the edge off, and gives my body some relief. My entire body is hurting and aching, its just sore as heck. I can hardly do anything but sit and lay, and everytime I get up, I can hardly stand up strait to walk. its terrible. Im starting to feel like I wont make it, and what am I working towards. At the same time, I know definitely that I do not want to go back into that pill life, I swear I dont want it, but at the same time, I want and need this to be over, and I need to feel better, this is just too much to handle. I feel like ai am losing my mind. I pray to god I dont keep feeling like this, it gives me no hope of getting to be normal again......will I. I just dont know if I will make it. Oh and b4 anyone even tells me, yes I have started attending my church, and yes I have na planned for this week. I have had to overcome an addiction b4, so I am very familiar with na meetings, and I also remember that, attending all those meetings did not help or change how i physically felt, no discredit to the na meetings, I do feel like they help mentally, but, they did not help my physical. It takes soooo much energy to even deal with self from minute to minute that I just dont have anything left, it feels useless. I just need to feel better. This can kill you, yes I know it can and will kill you if you continue to use wrecklessly, but so can this process to get off the pills too. I am just speechless......just speechless, and talking about it does not help.....?????
Thanks for the encouraging words.....I did end up getting a lil busy for the day, it did help. well its getting late, so I guess Its back to the hot epsom bath for tonite, and prayers for a better tomorrow. Im hangin in there. rI been having bad headaches too, I am just in awe of allllllll the aches and pains just everywhere, this is sooooooooo much torture. I cant believe Im even making it thiru every day like this.
Hi.....well recovery comes and goes early on this is not uncommon just know it will get better the ''pink cloud'' never last to long at least you got a break form it for a wile now is the time for a meeting dont put it off and get rid of all the pills you have in the house... and keep posting for support.....................Gnarly............................
COMMUNITY LEADER
If there is some sun in your area go out and soak some up. Are you taking any supplements? Those help too. You should be turning the corner real soon here so hang tight. I know this part is no fun. You can do this~
Glad you decided not to take the tramadol....hope you got rid of it, too!
It doesn't have to be a long boring day.....it's time to get your mind off yourself and how you are feeling. When I was a kid and would say I was bored....my mom used to tell me I needed to get my mind off ME and go help someone, or busy my mind. It works! And in this recovery process, our attitudes are EVERYTHING....90% of it really. Positive not Negative food for our minds. Cause our bodies believe everything our brains tell them.
Even if you physically don't feel like doing something....feed your MIND and re-direct your thoughts. Plug in some music, watch something funny, call someone, go to a meeting, reach out to someone behind you in the recovery process. Or force yourself to take a walk in the sunshine. Just sitting around thinking about ourselves is miserable, I agree. Give it a whirl girl, ok?
It doesn't have to be a long boring day.....it's time to get your mind off yourself and how you are feeling. When I was a kid and would say I was bored....my mom used to tell me I needed to get my mind off ME and go help someone, or busy my mind. It works! And in this recovery process, our attitudes are EVERYTHING....90% of it really. Positive not Negative food for our minds. Cause our bodies believe everything our brains tell them.
Even if you physically don't feel like doing something....feed your MIND and re-direct your thoughts. Plug in some music, watch something funny, call someone, go to a meeting, reach out to someone behind you in the recovery process. Or force yourself to take a walk in the sunshine. Just sitting around thinking about ourselves is miserable, I agree. Give it a whirl girl, ok?
Thx for your encouragement, Im still trying, and no I decided not to take the tramadol. I did post about my condition on my other post. Im posting like my brain is feeling huh...just all over the place. Well I just feel neutral....not happy about anything, just a limp puppy, dragging around with my head down. But Im not using, and I am hopeing that I find my joy soon. Well here goes another looooonnnngggg boring day. Im just lost......just dumbfounded.
Your handle is "Satan can't have me." By taking the tramadol, you will be had.
You don't have to fight. You just have to keep existing. One more hour. Just look at the next hour. That's it. Let go and stop fighting your reality so hard.
You will feel better. This is our payback for all the quick fixes we've taken. Just keep existing and it will pass. There's no way around it. And yes, you'
re at the end of the physical part.
You don't have to fight. You just have to keep existing. One more hour. Just look at the next hour. That's it. Let go and stop fighting your reality so hard.
You will feel better. This is our payback for all the quick fixes we've taken. Just keep existing and it will pass. There's no way around it. And yes, you'
re at the end of the physical part.
Please do not give in!!
That Weakness & No-Low Motivation or Energy is the end of the Physical. The Mental will come & go and this is when you need them Meetings.
PLZ no looking Back! Move Forward and Up! This will not kill you, as YOU are almost there.
Bless
That Weakness & No-Low Motivation or Energy is the end of the Physical. The Mental will come & go and this is when you need them Meetings.
PLZ no looking Back! Move Forward and Up! This will not kill you, as YOU are almost there.
Bless
Keep on keepin on.
Are you eating a clean diet of fruits, veggies and lean protein?
Taking vitamins?
Drinking plenty of fluids?
Getting sunshine and exercise?
Keep the faith.
Play some uplifting Christian music.
You are doing awesome.
Taking the tramadol will only lengthen your detox and withdrawal symptoms.
You are not alone in this.
Sending prayers of healing and encouragement,
Debbie
Are you eating a clean diet of fruits, veggies and lean protein?
Taking vitamins?
Drinking plenty of fluids?
Getting sunshine and exercise?
Keep the faith.
Play some uplifting Christian music.
You are doing awesome.
Taking the tramadol will only lengthen your detox and withdrawal symptoms.
You are not alone in this.
Sending prayers of healing and encouragement,
Debbie
Have you tried Tylenol for the body aches and headaches? Please don't take the tramadol. You don't need it. You will get better, I promise. Hold on tight and just ride the waves. I think we have really bad days and then they get good again. Pretty soon they will all be good. Try taking a hot shower or doing something to take your mind off how you are feeling. It is so much a mental game. Take deep breaths and try to calm you mind. I am rooting for you! I know you can do this!
I felt like **** mentally as well til day 26-27, then I felt it let off of me, I actually got 6 hours of normal sleep on day 27, still have depression and so much stress and my motivation/energy is off and on. Though Im slowly relearning that, that's life!!! I know the w/d are making me a little more tired than I should be, and all the small symptoms add up to one big problem (still withdrawaling). That's just life got to learn to face it head on, and that's why I'm doing day by day.
Point I'm making is, when I was around 14-25 days I thought it was never going to let up! So your not alone I was glued to this site in hopes of comfort. Your gonna be alright you will just ride it out. You deserve a clean life, obviously you realize that as well you've already GONE 2-3 WEEKS!! Don't stop now, this is where people RELASPE it's this feeling that mental fog and depression and just unhappy that makes so many relaspe and its what I found to be the toughest. I can relate to you more than you know!! But you need to flush all your pills. were getting sober lets just get sober for awhile and then see where to go with a sober mind. I really hope you ride this out please ride it out.
Il get back on I a bit to see if you responded
Point I'm making is, when I was around 14-25 days I thought it was never going to let up! So your not alone I was glued to this site in hopes of comfort. Your gonna be alright you will just ride it out. You deserve a clean life, obviously you realize that as well you've already GONE 2-3 WEEKS!! Don't stop now, this is where people RELASPE it's this feeling that mental fog and depression and just unhappy that makes so many relaspe and its what I found to be the toughest. I can relate to you more than you know!! But you need to flush all your pills. were getting sober lets just get sober for awhile and then see where to go with a sober mind. I really hope you ride this out please ride it out.
Il get back on I a bit to see if you responded
Hang in there honey! yes it ***** and yes it seems like you will never be normal but you will! I promise....I just started feeling "normal" this week....I smiled at a sunset, I laughed at my dog, i ran across the yard....just for the fun of it......a month ago I was so much worse....and I battled insomnia and fatigue and depression and pain and then abdominal s### but I see the other side...maybe just glimpses but it is there....and you can get there too! I have read your posts and I know you can do this....just dont take any meds...dont do it...just get through today and see how tomorrow feels....im here with you
Im terrified to even take the tramadol, but at the same time, I just need some relief. I am suffering sooooooo bad. This is too much. Dear Lord, please cand I just not feel like this. Will I be well again anytime soon??? It sure does not feel like it. I feel like this is permanent. How can this be. I dont even want to live in my own body. This process is killing me. I know I probly sound absolutely nutts, but that is exactly how I feel. I cant.....I just cant live like this.
Im crashing again....this is just pure ****. There are no words for all of this, it is insane, and can cause a person to go insane. Anxiety is back full force....omg, Im speechless...just speechless. I dont even know what else to do with myself. headaches......this is just horrible. Why is it that I feel like im back at day 1. This is a horrible existence. Either way, your in ****, if I continue the pill life, or if I quit, at this point it feels like, and looks like Im doomed either way.......its so sad, just pitiful. Im completely lost. idk if I even have the desire to keep trying to make it. Life is awful, why am I even on this planet. This is pure ****
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