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Avatar universal

tootough

I am at the end of my rope.  This methadone detox is kicking my a**.  22 days, and a week ago I felt b etter than I do now.  is it my imagination or are the muscles and tendons of my arms under where I shot up(no heroin since 6-2-07) feeling like the only way to  make them feel better is to punch them lightly(sometimes  not lightly)?  Am I still sweating one minute and colde the next.  It is not this bad everyday.  I was better this afternoon.  But every time I think it is getting better it gets worse.  When is the end to this misery. I was on methadon e full time since stopping heroin 6-02.  First 60mg then down, for the last 3 weeks, 10 to 5 to 2.5mg.  I thought it would be manageable.  The thought of vitamins or supplements makes me want to vomit.  The thought of a cracker or noodle makes me want to vomit.  I've had the runs for 20 days straight.  I'm tired and who can tell me what to do.  I can't make a meeting yet, though have no doubts of the theraputic value of one addict helping another.  This forum is all I can muster.  However, it is the best thing i've found by far.  Thanks so much.  i'll do just about an;ything to feel ANY better, but I have my resolve and I won't go back to heroin or methadone.  I NEVER WANT TO DO THIS AGAIN.  Ive detoxed from heroin several times, but was up and moving after 10 days, on a long detox.  This is different.  Almost too much.
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Avatar universal
woke up ok at best, and 4 tums and 5 bites of breakfast later was vomiting hurtfully.  But then I had a good day.  Really.  Double doses immodium, pelegrino and some mashed potatoes got me to my nap.  Maybe today the end to this is in sight, knock on wood.  Hope you're all doing ok!  
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Avatar universal
thanks and bless all of you! 3 weeks ago i just went off perc's ativan t3's celexa and clonozapan! It;s beena trip. It's true what you said about just being normal. Years ago, it was never this hard, but as i get older and my mind and body are changing, its harder to come back. It;s done a number on my memorie. The weird thing is im feeling im coming out of a 10 yr. blackout. all my surroundings are 10 yrs. older. 'even me'........this page has saved my life.
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Avatar universal
you guys are my solace.  A better night than day, that's how it usually is.  No luck here, except what you said, the need and push to feel normal again.  I know it's coming but the morning's can be tough.  And afternoons.  etc.  Every day is better, to anyone reading with fear about it.  It is getting better, just SLOWLY.  Keep it up.
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Avatar universal
Thanks and Bless you ( all )  too...
i can say Good Luck but it hasn't a thing to do with luck...we find ourselves in a place we want out of...( addiction)...our strength comes from that desire to be ourselves ..( normal again , eh!! ).....perhaps thats the lucky part ....to realize how terrific  feeling normal is....
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Avatar universal
Thanks your post is very helpful.
We no longer can dabble in anything.

Bless you
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Avatar universal
pain meds my drug of choice let me go all over the place then to methadone....untill i got so tired of the BS....i walked in the clinic on a monday told my counselor i wanted off....she said "we have a program to detox" and explained it...i said no...."wednesday is my last day"...and it was hell.....i got up to go to mass everymorning ( catholic)...7 AM....went back home...undressed and laid in bed till the next morning....john lennon said it was harder gettin of meth than heroin... it is very do-able...and you will survive...and feel soooo very much better.......it does take time....the physical then the mental....the opiate erge will never leave....don't let yourself be fooled into thinking you can "dabble with a perc..a vic... or a this or that"....it ain't gonna happen....you'll fall again and regret it....stay strong....stay focused....enjoy your life....the hard row to hoe is well worth the effort....i believe in a higher power...it still is hard .... but you have to pull from every supportive strength you can find
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Avatar universal
TooTough and exhostage
Hang in there.  I'm starting day 2 completely off 22 or so vicodin a day.
Pretty Achey, and my stomach is making the strangest noises ever!
Hot then cold, sleepy, then restless.

both you to can do this.

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Avatar universal
THANKS>  I am rooting for you too.  Oh you don't know the peace your words offer me.  30 days, good for you.  maybe it's not too tough, maybe I am.  These moments of strength only last a moment, but it makes it all get to the next day.  Thanks again.
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258986 tn?1237947507
Today is my 30th day of methadone w/d, I am so sorry for you and know how hard this is, but you can get the rest of the way if I can tootough, it is getting better the last couple of days but i know what you mean by sometimes it is worse first. the thing that really helped me is immodium so get some and get relief! I could not take vitamins yet either. The thing i learned about 'done w/d is it does not matter what mg you were taking it is still going to be a rough ride for about 30 days and sometimes longer. But i am so glad you quit and i am truly rooting for you.
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