xanax addiction

[Doris102]

I have been on xanax for many years,never thought for a minute i would get addicted.
my panic and anxiety attacts are awful, i cant function without xanax.
the doctors kept me on this drug all this time, i know i have to get help.
i am starting to count my pills now,this is so awful.
last week i was running low,asked my doctor for more,he rufused,the pharmacist
filled it.
the doctor was so incinsitive,told me to cut back.how can i cut back,when my body craves it.
i am now taking 1 mg ,the directions say to take 1 every 6 hours...what a laugh...
i take 1 about every 3 hours. when i get company or have to go to the store.(ETC)
i have to take another one,sometime i take 1\2, but it last only about an hour.
I recently lost my husband of 33 years,I am so heartsick and lonley.its just me and my 2 dogs.
i have 3 grown sons,they dont know how to cope with me.i am also a grandmother of 4.
how did i get myself in this mess???? when i talk on the phone,i get so nervous talking,i have to tell them i have to go.
getting to nervous to talk.I dont know how much longer i have in this world of ours.
but i would like it to be somewhat normal. idont know how to kick this awful addition.
I need HELP NOW !!! I should have done something about this years ago,
I didnt, so now im in limbo and want off this up and down roller coaster im on.
PLEASE !! CAN ANYONE HELP ME ?????

[MYM1985]

My name is Maggie and I am an epileptic, I am 27 yrs old, I take Keppra 1,500 mg a day and 700 mg of Lamictal a day. I take xanax 4 mg @ night. I started off with 2 mg and then I myself took it up to 4 mg @ night. I want to quit, when I know I am running low I get mood swings, get very irritable, I need help any advice?

[butterfly75]

i was addicted to xanax and have been clean for over 4 years now.  It was so hard to do but I was just determined to get off and made my mind up to start a taper and stay with it.  I also had read that they are testing melatonin for possible help to get off of benzos.  I took it and I think it helped me somewhat.  Every little bit of help you can get you need to take.  Good luck to everyone, I am praying for you all.

[bpaigek]

I am 17 years old & not an addict at all. Thank you all for letting me see that drugs do not help in any way. Im young & turning 18 soon. & im also engaged. Thank god i didnt turn to drugs for saddness.

[sadinmichigan]

I am praying and praying for you!! You can do this and I know it is hard..our minds are so powerful and you have to get that mindset..YOU CAN...YOU CAN..and we will all be here for you..You have so much heartache right now ,reach out to all those around you too..One thing I have learned by being on this forum is that people are caring and willing to help..Much love to you Doris..Lisa

[malenurse57]

You can do this ! It will be hard but it is possible. Remember I can , I CAN, I CAN

[Doris102]

thank you so much for your response.
I always say i cant . it is so hard, i am trembling right now.dont know how im going to make it .
somehow some way.
thank hun

Doris

[sadinmichigan]

First of all I can't help but notice that you constantly say you CAN"T do it!! You have to my friend..I know the loss of your husband is terribly painful but no amount of xanax is going to help that..Since you can't get them filled for 8 days you are going to have to cut them back...I'm not sure how you should split them up But honey..You are going to have no choice..Have you sought some sort of greif counseling?? If your Dr. gives in to your increasing need of xanax..he is doing you no favors and truthfully there will never be enough..I wish so badly I could take away your pain,,you are slef medicating and for that pain there will never be enough meds...You CAN help it!! and you CAN do it!! start by telling yourself that..Please know that i care..but you are the one that has to really pull it together in yourself and start to do this..

[Doris102]

i just counted my xanax.!!!! i have enough to last me 4 days.
my refill isnt due yet. i called the pharmacist,he  told me they cant refill  for another 8 days.   WHAT  AM I TO DO ..???
i know my doctor isnt going to let me have more. i talked with him 2 weeks ago.
he told me then,,i have to cut back.that i am over using...I cant help it..!!
my body is crying out for at least 5 per day...i cant sleep,because i lay and tremble
and every nerve is jerking. i cant function at all.
PLEASE TELL ME WHAT AM I GOING TO DO.

ever since i lost my husband,my mind and body has been a wreck.i miss him soooooo
much.    WHAT TO DO. WHAT TO DO.

[cubfan70]

Doris DO NOT take klonopin to get off xanax!!! I was taking 16 xanax a day in the height of my addiction and when I told my doc I wasn't remembering days at a time, all he did was put me on klonopin which were WORSE!!! not only did I have blackouts, but for some reason I would CRAVE opiates and go to any lengths to get them. I was totally out of control. I SWEAR those pills are a HORROR story all by themselves. I'm so sorry about how you are feeling, but as we all know, we're using these drugs to "feel better" and they only make it worse and they cause so much more heartache and trouble when we get addicted. I will check in daily to see how you are doing. Good luck, I'll be here if you need me. Peace

[Sajonna]

Doris,

I feel for you on the loss of your husband.  Really I do.

In the early 80's I was assaulted and beat up badly.  I started to have panic attacks.  I did not see a shrink until 1984 when my dad died suddenly. The panic attacks really set in then.  I was Rx Xanax and it saved my life.  I never abused it.  I only took what was prescribed.  I also saw a shrink regularly to talk about things. I was able to use the Xanax for a short time (.50 mg 1-3x a day as needed for panick attacks).  Somedays I did not leave the house so I didn't need to take them.

In 1988 my mom died suddenly (these were all natural cause deaths too--but neither parent was sick from a disease.)  Panic attacks set in again. This time I could not leave the house at all.  I went to a different shrink and they insisted that I take .50mg 4x a day.  This made me too tired. I asked if I could take them as needed like before. They said they work better if I take them round the clock. I switched shrinks.  Went back to the original doctor.  She laughed at that prescription.  She told me in no way was I ever to take that amount round the clock of this drug.  I respected her. I told her I was very depressed and could not leave my house without anxiety.  She put me on an anti-depressant for about 6 months. But she also told me "It is normal to feel depressed after what happened to me".  She insisted if I were to keep taking the meds I would have to see a psychologist.  So I did for about a year.  After about 6 months the shrink insisted I go in for a hormone test.

Come to find out, it was my hormones all jacked up. One of my ovaries was not working and the other barely functioning.  Plus I had another female problem going on.

So don't be so hard on yourself for taking this medication Xanax.  Perhaps you just have not found the right doctor to treat you.  

Were you getting the Xanax from a regular doctor or a psychaitrist? Please go talk to someone. Losing one's husband is a big loss.  

And please do not just quit those Xanax.  I was told never to do that if I was taking them round the clock.  In my case I was always able to go several days without any.

Hope you get help soon.

xoxox
SJ

[christos24]

I was once addicted to xanax as weel, unroescribed and takigna roudn 4 mgs at a time. I did that along wtih opiates for a good two years and decided to go to detox and clean up my life. My suggestions sis to get ona  long alsting benzodiazepine, such as clonazepam, which i used, or valium(diazepam), there are a few otehrs but these are the amin two used in this sort of thing. In getting off xanax it is better to use a long lasting benzo and at least feel comfortable and be anxiety-free. Clonazepam is pretty stronga dn ina f ew months with the help of a doctor you should eba ble to ween of benzos completely I was defintely able to and with very ltitle discomfort. Everyone sis different so you amy react differently but this is my experience with xanax addiction. I am also on a suboxone maintenance treatment plan for oxycontin and heroin abuse and addiction. Both clonazepam and suboxone have been life savers in regaining my will to live. I had given up hope and now i am happier and healthier than I ever was before.

[ladyboop]

Doris,
      I sent you a message, Check your inbox, top right of the page...


                Lady

[Doris102]

I need help... Is there another way to fight depression without taking more drugs???
I have stopped taking my anti depressants, i dont like the side effects.they are awful.
than kyou for any information.

Doris

[Moosiegirl]

Hi,

I am so sorry you lost your husband and that you are dependent on Xanax. Ouch! I lost my Dad, and I became dependent on Ativan, and I couldn't get off it by tapering, and I wound up in cold turkey detox. Never even try that! What you really need to do is go to the website, benzo.org.uk and download a copy of the Ashton Manual. It will tell you to switch to Valium, the longest-acting benzo and to taper off it very slowly. I have Graves' disease, and I became accidentally addicted to Ativan, and now I am in the midst of a slow taper. It is really quite horrendous, but at least I can taper off that drug, whereas, with the Ativan, this was impossible for me. Considering switching to Valium, but first find a benzo-wise doctor in your area.

MoosieGirl

[sadinmichigan]

i just have been thinking about you..I really hope you find a competant Dr. who understands the nature of this drug..I know how bad xanax w/d is and I had no idea that they were addicting when I first started taking them..not until I decided to flush them..I was in the e.r by the next day unable to breath thinking I was having a heart attack..I didn't even think to tell them in the e.r that I had flushed them until hours later..as soon as I said that..the dr gave me ativan in my i.v and i was fine pretty much right away..He looked at me and said ..You are addicted to xanax and don't ever do that again. I did wean down very very slowly and felt little discomfort. I know everybodys experiences are different. I agree how horrid they are to w/d from IF you do not go slow..for you as I said before might mean 1/2 of a1/2 of a 1/2..you know what I'm saying..it could literally mean a crumb..I eventually had got to the point where I forgot to even take them and I was just done..(from 7mg.day-for 1 1/2 yrs) but total I guess it has been longer than I thought..6 yrs or so..You can do this but I believe you are going to need help.  I am so glad you are posting...we are all here for you..xo your friend..Lisa

[toomanytimes]

I love to hear when a person has a great dr like it sounds like you had to help you get off the xanax-too often they are not so helpful getting off as they were getting you started.  Also hats off to you for sticking to that taper plan for so long, thats awesome!  And also great example that it CAN be Done!

[Needhelp59]

You can do this.  My marriage is fine; however I have to admit that if my husband had not made the effort and gone to the doctor to discuss my abuse, I would most likely still be using them.  It was tough, but you can do it.  If I can make it, anyone can.  Stay on here for support - the people are great!!

[Doris102]

hi there, i am so glad to hear from you,this is a great site,glad i found it.
i am so sorry about your marriage,that hurts big time.
i am so glad your off of this drug xanax,is hell to know your addicted to a drug.never thought i would be one of them.
thank you for your kind words,i need that.  im going to see what i can do to
get off this drug.
many thanks
God Bless

[Doris102]

hi there,
yes,this place is awesome,thank you so much .i am so glad your off the pills.
you had a good doctor.i am taking alot more than you did, sorry to say,you were taking 1/2 of what i take. i only wish that i was taking that little.
i need another way out of this mess,get a new doctor,or counseling or something.
i have to look into that.
thank you for welcoming me here. that means alot to me. i have been under so much stress.
take care and many hugs

[Doris102]

Hello,
i am so glad to find this site.so many wonderful people here.
I am also so sorry about your husband.i know that i am not the same
since i lost my wonderful husband. i cant seem to accept it yet.i hear that it
takes time....for me its going to take alot of that.
I can feel your pain, my heart goes out to you.we have to just hang in there
together,and do the best we can.
please take care hun

[Needhelp59]

Hi Doris,

Please talk to your doctor.  I too was on xanax for years.  It got so bad that I almost lost my marriage.  My husband spoke with my doctor and when I went in for a visit he talked to me and set up a taper plan.  It took months, but it worked.  I have been off them now for almost 2 years.  I took lexapro for a short time afterwards, but now I am on nothing.  PLEASE do not give up.  It is doable and with guidance you can come off with minimal withdrawal.  The dosage I was on was lowered like 1/8 mg. every few weeks.  Feel free to PM me if I can be of help.  God bless.

[Doris102]

hello ,
thank youso much for the advice,this is a great site to come to forhelp.
those that are going through as me,either they have conqured itor trying.
you cant believe that my so called friends have left me since i lost
my husband.i guess they dont know what to say. it a shame people do that.
i get lonley,my sons cant be with me,as they have there own lifes to lead.
i have taken more xanax since loosing my husband, i never thought in a million
years that i would get hooked on a drug.
i knoweveryone in here is supportive,i thank them for that.
i do need help, because i cant do this alone.i have to find professional
help.I thank you so much for your response.
hugs to you

[Doris102]

hi there,
thank you so much and for the invitation to the pm.that means alot to me.
yes it has been hell since i lost my husband.i still cantaccept thought
that he he is gone. im up all hours of the night,cant sleep,or eat.my 2 dogs
are my comfort,thank goodness for them.
my doctor should have never kept me onthis drug for so long.
i cant leave the house without them.i am taking more since i lost my husband.
that is why i am running out to soon. i have to find a drug place to get some help.
this is a great site to come to.am glad i found it.
thanks again for your support.
sending you hugs

[malenurse57]

Just remember you can do this. I have 2 scriptures that have helped me.
1. If God be for who can be against me.
2. I can do all things through Christ who strenghtens me.

Good Luck and God bless.
"T"