Aa
I need help. :(
I like painkillers no im not addicted i dont go out looking don't sell my first born dont abuse them when I have had them I just like them. hydrocodone oxycodone. they make me feel good not like maaan im so high right now just good. ifeel happy I can focus, ihave energy, I sleep better, I have more patience. and the biggest one is im not in pain. I have a muscle spasm in my lower back that causes my lower spine to be too straight the only idea my doctor has is sticking a giant needle in my back which is a problem for me(needle fear). anyways im not sure what to do any advice?
Not everyone loves the feeling of being on painkillers, but if you do, you are at risk of becoming addicted. Don't make the mistake other addicts make of telling yourself that you're different, and that you won't develop a problem, that you'll stop before it becomes a problem. Everyone starts out that way. We all thought we could handle it. There's something about the receptors in your brain (genetic) that is a fit for the chemical you're using in the opiate, and it just fits. Makes you feel like you're on top of the world.
However, it's a complete and total sham. It doesn't last, your brain and body get used to it, and you need more and more to get the euphoria. Your life changes, subtly at first, and as time goes on, things start to revolve around the pills. The pills make things happen, they make you sharper and more social and more friendly, and you can get a lot done with them in your system. But without them, you drag along, miss the energy, the happy place you get to with them.
Eventually, you lie to get them, and you have already been sneaking to take them. Nobody knows how many you take, and your life begins to seem really fake. As time goes on, you grow to hate the pills and yourself, the slave you've become to them. They're the first thing you think about in your day.
You have to get really, really sick of yourself, your pill-counting, and your conniving thinking in order to get more pills, before you're even willing to look at the issue, let alone talk openly and honestly with someone else about needing to do something and stop the craziness.
Some very smart people have been down this road, so don't think it can't happen to you because the drug does your thinking for you, my friend. Stop minimizing your affection for the painkillers. You sound to me like you're on a slippery slope.
However, it's a complete and total sham. It doesn't last, your brain and body get used to it, and you need more and more to get the euphoria. Your life changes, subtly at first, and as time goes on, things start to revolve around the pills. The pills make things happen, they make you sharper and more social and more friendly, and you can get a lot done with them in your system. But without them, you drag along, miss the energy, the happy place you get to with them.
Eventually, you lie to get them, and you have already been sneaking to take them. Nobody knows how many you take, and your life begins to seem really fake. As time goes on, you grow to hate the pills and yourself, the slave you've become to them. They're the first thing you think about in your day.
You have to get really, really sick of yourself, your pill-counting, and your conniving thinking in order to get more pills, before you're even willing to look at the issue, let alone talk openly and honestly with someone else about needing to do something and stop the craziness.
Some very smart people have been down this road, so don't think it can't happen to you because the drug does your thinking for you, my friend. Stop minimizing your affection for the painkillers. You sound to me like you're on a slippery slope.
Well i must say I don't agree with what they have said because if ur talking about cortisone shots, those r painful and literally every person I've ever spoke to about them haven't had anything good to say about them. Now as for the fact that ur on an addiction forum I won't call u an addict before ur willing to call urself an addict because u have to want help before it would ever work anyhow . Do u believe truthfully that ur an addict and u need help cause if not then this conversation should b over however if u feel that u r then I've got a few helpful insights for ya. :) !!! For one thing if u take a vitamin everyday for a year and then all of a sudden for a week u don't take that vitamin guess what? Ur body will react and there is a difference between physical addiction and mental addiction and so on and so forth. So even if u only take one or 2 Vic's regularly then of course ur body is gonna react. Duh!!! But u and I both know that ur craving that " feel good" feeling all the time now and when u don't have em u feel slow and sluggish and u don't even wanna talk but when ur on them u feel productive and energized and no body pains to stop u. However, ur body feeling pain is a good thing cause it's ur body's way of telling u what's wrong or that the pain can explain different things but I u block those feelings then how would u know something was wrong? U wouldn't because ur used to getting high and talking till the sun comes up by discussing the weather or politics or religion ect ect !!!! Lol lol bottom line is that u need to speak with a doctor and explain ur situation and see what they tell u and don't take one doctors thoughts cause I know 20 doctors that are clueless about addiction. They may have went to medical school and they can cure ur bumps and bruises but I promise u addiction is something that u have to go through to understand fully and if u don't feel safe and comfortable with who ur talking to then ur not gonna b honest and 1st u have to b honest with urself and then with a doctor. Try a detox center or perhaps a methadone clinic. Both of those places have access to a ton of information regarding addiction an all the people that work at those places are very familiar with the way an addicts mind works and the best part is u won't have to feel like u gotta lie cause they are completely confidential and lord knows regular doctors tend attach a sign to file that follows u so that everytime in the future no doctor wants to treat ur cold cause they swear ur " drug seeking" and that's funny in itself considering the 5 Vicodin they give u at an er after sitting there for 5 hrs isn't worth it to 99% addicts cause they can find more and better on the streets but they treat u like a heroine addict no matter what u say so I would stick with those that understand what ur going through. Sorry about my writing that's half txting and my iPhone isn't as smart as it thinks it is an u can tell by the spelling lol .... Good luck and if I can help in the future please get ahold of me. Also, I don't obviously have all the answers so get to a professional ( wink wink) lol
I agree with julia m a--I loved the feeling too. If you're really hurting, get the shot--do NOT turn to drugs. I've been on fentanyl 50mg patches for 3-4 yrs. I'm trying with help of pain mgmt to get off them as they no longer work at all. She's cut me back to 25mg patches 1/3days in place of 50mg 1/3days. Also, I got some compounded cream to rub on my knees. I have a bad total knee replacement in 06. The pills may feel good to you now, but at some point you'll have to stop them, after taking higher and higher doses to get that "feeling". PLEASE don't turn to the pills. I'm scared to death about getting off these patches. I also get shots in my "good" knee every 3 months--the shots hurt, but suck it up and do it--GOOD LUCK.
MEDICAL PROFESSIONAL
You are here on the Addiction forum exactly because you know that you are well on the way to becoming addicted to opiates. You also know that if you do not stop now, it will be close to impossible to stop later.
You need to see a pain specialist. Ask to go through physical therapy. That is usually very helpful for back pain. Epidural steroid shots are very therapeutic and not liking needles is only an excuse to continue to use opiates.
You need to see a pain specialist. Ask to go through physical therapy. That is usually very helpful for back pain. Epidural steroid shots are very therapeutic and not liking needles is only an excuse to continue to use opiates.
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