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Is There A Way to Find Her?
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Is There A Way to Find Her?

So, I was wondering how much it would cost and how much it's worth to track down a half-sibling that was given up for adoption?

I am 20, from Iowa, & my dad had a child with someone other than my mom about a year before I was born.

It wasn't his choice to give her up for adoption, either... I believe he broke up with the biological mother before finding out she was pregnant, and she signed her rights away.

So, somewhere out there, I have a half-sister that is only one year older than me. My dad talks about her all the time. wishing she would come looking for him. He doesn't believe there's anything he can do, but I'm determined to prove him wrong.

One reason it is necessary, regardless if relationships are established or not, is because my dad has a kidney disease that he passed on to me, and could have very well passed on to her...

So, if anyone out there is able to side with me and point me in some sort of directions, I'd really appreciate it. My dad deserves the relationship he was cheated out of, and I want to help him realize there are ways around things (hopefully and most of the time).

Thank you.
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Hi,

I just went through the process of finding an older sibling.  My parents gave him up for adoption when they were 16, so he is my fully biological brother.
First off, its strange that your father wasnt involved with the adoption process even if they were broken up...same thing happened in my situation, my dad broke up with my mom but still in order to make the adoption final they had to track down my father and have him sign. Both my mother and father didnt want to give him up for adoption though, they were forced to by my grandma.  But just think, in your fathers situation, you may not have even been born if his girlfriend were to have kept the baby...
First off is it a closed adoption? Im assuming it is since you have no information.  The way i obtained information for my brother was actually not legal....we had my grandma (who is a police officer) sort of demand information from the town hall in which the adoption took place....the clerk who gave his name was actually not suposed to by law, but she did.
From there we searched through facebook and white pages and got numbers and stuff.

Considering you dont want to do things the illegal way, I think you would have to contact the birth mother.  She may have some information...
Also something to think about is the fact that she may not want to be found...I found my older brother and have been sooo blessed to have developed a great relationship with him...but on the other hand, a week or so ago i went to contact my biological grandmother (who gave my mother up for adoption) and she very much did not want a relationship with us.  It was very heart breaking to me becuase I had my hopes up so much.  Im not tellign you to give up hope by all means, just remain open minded.  It definitly is possible to find her! Good luck, and keep us updated on your search!
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I had a good experience with The Alma Society.  You can check them out on the internet and give them a call.  Everyone is a volunteer and those I worked with were excellent.
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