Why adoption?

[Leonie2109]

Hello,
I'm going to a high school in the Netherlands and my teacher want me to post a question on a forum, so I can learn something about that question. I like to know more about adoption, because it's a big subject and there's a lot to talk about and a lot to learn about.
I like to know how adoption exactly goes. So, how long does it takes until you can see the child. And why do people choose to adopt a child from another country, and not just from your own country?
I also like to know whats the big reason people adopt a child.
Thanks!

[suzi-q]

Hi, I am an adoptive parent.  I adopted my daughter from China.  My husband is not able to have children, so I immediately thought adoption before any kind of fertility methods.  My cousin has 4 adopted children from Korea, and for some reason, I just knew this was my calling...There was never any hesitation nor any longing for a biological child.  It felt like it was "meant to be".  First, we considered adopting from Guatamala, but decided to go with China because of all the little girls that get "thrown away" because of the one child policy.  I started my paper work for adoption in 2004.  At that time the wait for adoption from China (after your dossier is completed) was 6-9 months.  Now the wait is up to 2 possibly 3 years.  In order to adopt, I had to get police clearance, health records, finance records, and finger printing....it cost a heafty sum of money to have it all notarized and authenticated.  We also had to have a home study done by a social worker.  She met at our house the first time and checked out the home.  Then she interviewed my husband and me separately and then once more, together.  Once all this is completed (took us about a year becuase we had to wait 12 weeks for our fingerprinting to clear!...they were backed up!).  This is your dossier.  You include pictures of your home and your family and why you want to adopt from China.  This is sent to China and the wait begun.  In January 2006 we finally got our referral.  It showed a picture of our daughter and a medical record that was written in Chinese.  We had to have everything translated and then checked out by a doctor who deals will adoptive children.  Then we decide if we accept or deny our referral...the moment I openned the envelope I immediately fell in love.  I didn't care about any of the paper work and just went through the formality and sent back my acceptance.  Then I had to wait for permission to travel.  I traveled to China on March 17 2006.  I held my daughter for the first time on March 20, 2006.  I was in China for 12 days while we waited for all paper work to be completed...baby's visa, adoptive papers, etc.  I then came home with my China Doll. We had to have one more home visit by the Social worker a year after my daughter was home.  We also had to re-adopt her here in America so she can have a birth certificate from the USA.  They had a nice ceremony over in China at the US Embassy which declared them all as US Citizens!  I cried!

I adopted a child because I wanted a family.  I went overseas because I didn't want the hassle or heartbreak of anyone ever showing up on my front doorstep asking for their daughter back.  In China, these children are abandoned, and I can sleep at night knowing she is truly mine.  I do know, however, quite a few people who adopt even after having their own.  Some families have just so much to give and want to have big families and give to those who are less fortunate....

I hope this helped answer your question!

[HarleyHarlow]

I was adopted when I was a baby, and you have to be eighteen if it's a closed adoption.

[starladarling]

I adopted from the US and while so much of my reasons and requirements were the same/similar to the story above, we went with the US because of a few reasons.  We have asian relatives and had thought about china.  we weren't old enough though- you have to be at least thirty and I was 25 at the time.  After doing a bit of reading, I decided I wanted an infant and so often with other countries you do not get a child that's just been born.  For my first I wanted to experience the WHOLE thing (or as much as I could at least).  We were at the hospital hours after our daughter was born, and would have been there for the birth if we could have gotten a flight on time.  We spent two days in the hospital with her birthmother and are forever greatful for that.  We spent ten days in another state waiting for all of the paperwork to clear and had the continued homestudies before finalization clearing that we were fit parents.  Most amazing day ever was the day it was fully finalized.  Things were finalized on the birthparents end within three days.  There was a waiting period before rights could be signed away but once thats done she could show at my doorstep all she wants but my daughter is mine in ever way.  (not that i worry about her doing that though quite honestly.)  In addition, while it is an open adoption, the birthparents do not have our address or last name.  I had a good relationship so we do have email and had cell phones too but I know either of us could get in touch via the agency if there was a need.  Adoption from here is not like the movies and news make you think.  If they reported all the happy and normal stories no one would care so like they don't report how many people lived each day; but rather how many were shot or injured or whatever... they don't report how many happy adoptions but rather those few and far between problems if that makes any sense.
I love my daughter so much, but it's not healthy to live in fear, but even moreso, I have no more to worry about than any other parent does for the safety of my child being abducted I was assured.
I am forever thankful for adoption and the family it has brought me.