Look, I am biased about this, but I happen to think that the best way for you to figure out what your fears are is to go talk to someone about them. A well-trained professional psychotherapist will be able to help you figure out the questions to ask yourself in order to get in better touch with "the inner me."
I assure you if I had money , I would love to see a therapist perhaps I'd be more willing to do that right off the bat, then come to online questioning site... hmmm?